Married Men

by Carl Weber

  “No, you was right. These drinks are strong. I can feel this one already.” She took her napkin and wiped her forehead. “Hurry up so I can leave.”

  “Sure, I’ll be right back.” I smiled as I went to the bar.

  When I returned, Diane’s head was down on the table. I shook her to see if she was awake. “Diane,” I whispered, shaking her again. She didn’t move. I looked around the room to see if anyone had noticed what had happened. Nope, most of the early-afternoon crowd was up front at the bar and none of them were paying attention to us. The only people nearby were the two brothers in the booth in front of me, and they were my frat brothers, Walter and Jeff.

  “Yo, y’all, she’s out,” I whispered.

  Like clockwork they stood, grabbed Diane under the arms and carried her the ten feet out the side door of the bar. Within seconds we were all in my car, headed down Jamaica Avenue on our way to the Budget Motor Inn on Rockaway Boulevard.

  “Think anybody saw us?” Jeffrey, the larger of my two frat brothers, asked. He looked back to see if we were being followed.

  “Nah, ain’t nobody see us. I was watching the whole time.” I grinned.

  “Good, I love it when a plan comes together,” he laughed.

  “Hey, Walter, how’s our guest doing?” I turned my head quickly to see if Diane was all right.

  “I don’t know, man. She looks awfully quiet if you ask me. You sure she’s breathing?” Walter, the more paranoid of my frat brothers, leaned over and pressed his head against Diane’s chest, cupping his hand over his ear. I’m sure he wasn’t doing anything raunchy, but I didn’t like the idea that he was so close to copping a feel from my best friend’s wife. Besides, Diane was just the type of woman Walter liked.

  “What the fuck are you doing, Walter?”

  “I’m trying to see if she’s breathing, goddammit!” He sounded nervous as he placed his head back on her chest.

  “Well, is she?” It took him a few seconds to answer, and that made me a little nervous too.

  “Yeah, she’s breathing,” he sighed.

  “Good, now get your hand off her titty.” Walter snapped his head back, sitting up straight.

  “What did you give her anyway?” Jeff asked.

  “It’s called night-night. The white boys in the clubs call it the date-rape drug.”

  “Isn’t that shit dangerous?” Walter’s voice was all concern.

  “Nah, it’s safe. I went on the Internet and checked it out.”

  We pulled in front of Room 103 of the Budget Motor Inn less then ten minutes after we left the bar. I jumped out of the car and knocked on the door while Walter and Jeff quickly carried Diane from the car. My other frat brother, Biggie, opened the door with a big smile.

  “Man, this is gonna be funny as shit.” Biggie stepped aside so that Jeff and Walter could carry Diane into the room.

  “Look, don’t be gettin’ no weird ideas. We just gonna do what I told y’all and get the hell outta here.” I gave Biggie the eye and he smiled. “I mean it, man,” I warned.

  “Yeah, well, let’s just pray she don’t wake up. We could all go to jail behind this shit,” Walter reminded us.

  “Will you calm down, Wait? She ain’t gonna wake up, and we ain’t gonna get in trouble. Now prop her up on the bed so we can get started.” Walter walked over to the bed and sat Diane up straight.

  “Should I take her clothes off?” Jeff asked, smiling.

  “No! Hell, no! We can do exactly what we need with her clothes on. Damn, y’all some perverted mothafuckers!” I shook my head. I knew these brothers were gonna have to be kept in check.

  “You calling us perverted? Who came up with this idea?” Jeff laughed. I ignored him and turned to Biggie.

  “Come on, Biggie, let’s get the show on the road.”

  I reached down into my little duffle bag and found the Polaroid camera I’d brought. By the time I read the directions and looked over at Diane, Biggie was standing next to her with his johnson hard as a rock about six inches from her open mouth. If you didn’t know she was passed out, you’d swear she was about to deep-throat him. And that would be one hell of a feat considering they didn’t call him Biggie because of his height. The man had a johnson the size of a baseball bat.

  “Yo, Jay, you gonna take the picture or what?” I watched the way Biggie held Diane’s head and suddenly I was starting to think this wasn’t such a good idea. Just looking at Diane knocked out, with her mouth open and Biggie’s thing so close, made me a little uneasy. But then I started thinking about all the shit she was talkin’ about Kenya and me at the bar and I thought, Fuck that bitch.

  “Yeah, I’m’a take it.” I snapped two shots then waited for Jeff to pose himself on the other side of Diane. I snapped two more. By the time we were done, we’d taken some of the freakiest pictures you’d ever wanna see. Phase one of my plan was complete. Diane was about to learn firsthand what happened to Wil could happen to anyone. Now all I had to do was get her back to her car safely and figure out the best way to get these pictures into her hands so that she’d stop torturing Wil.

  43

  Kyle

  That was it. With one swing of the judge’s gavel, I went from being a married man to a divorcé. I glanced over at Lisa, and when we made eye contact, both of us looked away quickly. I rubbed my hands over my face, trying to stop the tears from welling up in my eyes, but it was useless. I’d had more than my share of bad days in the past year, but this was by far the worst.

  I could barely remember how this rift between Lisa and me had started in the first place. I watched Lisa walk toward the courtroom door, followed by an entourage of family and friends. Diane turned around and gave me the finger with a smirk. It took all I had not to flip her the bird myself. Thank God Lisa had enough class to grab her hand and chastise her. I couldn’t tell what she was saying to Diane, but I’m sure Lisa put her in her place. Damn, even after what we had just been through, Lisa still showed me respect. That was one classy lady. I had really fucked up. Seven fucking years down the drain and I had no real explanation for my failure.

  “You okay, Kyle?” My friend and lawyer, Greg, patted my shoulder and handed me a tissue.

  “No, Greg, I’m not okay.” I was still staring at Lisa as she disappeared behind the door. “I just watched my life walk out that door.”

  “You mean your wife?”

  “No, I mean my life. Lisa was my life, Greg. And like an idiot I wasn’t smart enough to realize it until it was too late.”

  “Yeah, I know, buddy. I know.” He patted me on the back as we left the courtroom. “Come on. Let’s go get a drink. I have some news that might cheer you up.”

  Greg and I sat down in a booth in a small Irish pub called Dwyer’s, about two blocks from the courthouse on Hillside Avenue. He ordered a beer and a burger. I wasn’t hungry, so I just ordered a Dewars.

  “Okay. What’s this big surprise that’s going to cheer me up?” I doubted seriously that any news would help at this point unless he was about to tell me this was all a bad dream and it was time to wake up.

  Greg looked at me and smiled. “The city finally made an offer to settle your false arrest lawsuit.” I stared at him. He didn’t realize it, but he had just reminded me what had set into motion the destruction of my marriage.

  “What’s the offer?” I asked, but interrupted before he could answer. My cell phone was vibrating. “Hold on a minute.” I flipped open my cell phone. “Hello? Hello? Goddammit, Val! I know this is you.” I was really starting to get annoyed by all the bullshit phone calls I’d been getting. I didn’t have any concrete proof, but I was sure it was Val.

  “You all right, Kyle? Anything I need to help you with?” Greg looked a little concerned.

  “Nah, man. Just someone I know acting stupid. Nothing I can’t handle.” I didn’t want to explain what Val had been doing lately. Especially since Greg had warned me about dating before the divorce was final. “So what kind of offer did the city make?” I tried to
sound enthusiastic.

  “Believe it or not, three hundred thousand,” he smiled.

  “I thought you said their initial offer would be about a hundred thou?” I asked incredulously.

  “I did. Somebody big must think they really fucked up.”

  “Take the offer, Greg.” Greg flinched, and looked at me like I had three heads.

  “What d’you mean, take the offer? It’s their first offer. We might be able to squeeze seven figures out of them and still not go to court.”

  “Take the offer, Greg,” I repeated seriously. He stared at me with confusion, and I could tell he was disappointed. But I was not in the mood to explain myself to anybody today. Not even my old college roommate.

  “Any particular reason why?” he pressed.

  “Yeah, because I said so.” I’m sure I surprised him with my attitude.

  “Kyle, do you realize that after I get my third, you’re only gonna get two hundred thousand dollars out of this?” He spoke like I was mentally deficient.

  “Yeah, Greg, I do. Matter of fact, take out a pen and write this down.” Greg did as he was told but he still looked disappointed. Without my interference he probably woulda cleared over three hundred grand for himself. That’s a lot of dough to take out of a lawyer’s pocket, especially a lawyer you call a friend.

  “Outta the two hundred grand, I want you to put forty-five into each of my daughters’ trust funds. Then—” Greg interrupted.

  “You sure you want me to do it that way? Maybe we should set up new trust funds for your kids. The way your divorce decree reads now, Lisa’s the administrator of all existing trust accounts for your kids. Besides, maybe you should use this money to buy a house.”

  “Trust me on this one, Greg. I’d mess up the money for the girls before Lisa would. And as far as me buying a house, I’m not ready for that yet. I’m comfortable right where I’m at. ” Greg was silent, but his expression told me he thought I was making a big mistake. I continued my instructions. “I want you to open college trust accounts for ten grand for each of Jay, Wil, and Allen’s kids. Make sure the mothers can’t get to the accounts, especially in Allen’s case.” Greg shook his head a few times but continued writing. I know he was too through with me.

  “What should I do with the remaining money?” he asked flatly.

  “Put it in a blind trust for now with me and Jay as the administrators. Just between you, me, and the wall, Jay got some girl pregnant. I’m just trying to look out for the baby like I would do his other kids.”

  “Very honorable of you,” Greg sneered. He obviously thought I was a complete fool.

  I left Greg and his attitude about a half hour later. Once he wrote down my instructions, there wasn’t any need for me to stick around listening to him tell me how stupid I was. Hell, friend or not, he was working for me. I headed over to my Jamaica Avenue store, and when I arrived, I didn’t say a word to anyone. I just went into my office and shut the door behind me. I poured myself a drink and gulped it down, hoping to rid myself of the pain that had become my life. I was drained, and I felt like I was gonna collapse at any moment. I lay down on the office couch, squirming around until I was comfortable. The stress of the divorce, Ma Jackson’s death, and the lack of sleep I’d had lately were really starting to catch up with me. Within minutes I dozed off and probably would have stayed that way till morning if it wasn’t for a knock at the door.

  “Kyle, I’m getting ready to leave. You okay?” It was Sharon, my store manager.

  “Yeah, I’m okay. Go ahead. I’ll lock up.” I glanced at the clock. Damn, it was almost 7:15 P.M. I’d been asleep for nearly six hours. I sat up and rubbed my face with both hands. When I looked up, I was staring at one of my wedding pictures. I felt like I needed to cry, but I couldn’t.

  The phone rang and I picked it up.

  “Hello?”

  Whoever it was didn’t answer, but I could hear Luther Vandross playing in the background. I spoke one more time, then hung up when I got no response. I picked up my briefcase and keys and locked up the store. I headed over to my Highland Avenue apartment and was glad to see Wil’s truck parked out front. At least with him home I’d have someone to talk to. I figured once I took a shower and changed, I’d head on upstairs to his place to see if he wanted to go to the Ponderosa in Green Acres Mall for something to eat. They had one hell of a buffet over there, and the big man loved to eat. I was pretty hungry myself Plus I really needed somebody to talk to. Wil’s about the best listener I know and this was a subject I know he’d wanna talk about. Especially since he and Diane were headed down that divorce court road.

  When I stepped off the elevator, I was immediately hit with the wonderful aroma of Caribbean ox tails coming from down the hall. Mmm, mmm, mmm, that shit smelled so good I could almost taste it. And the farther I walked down the hall, the better it smelled. When I finally reached my apartment, it took me about two seconds to realize the smell was coming from underneath my door. As bad a day as I was having, I had to take a deep whiff and smile. Only one person I knew could make ox tails like that, and that was my mom.

  I’d told her and my friends that I didn’t need or want any of them to come down to the courthouse. In my mind the divorce was something between Lisa and me. At least that’s the way I felt before I saw the entourage Lisa walked in with. That’s when I realized I’d made a big mistake and could have used some moral support.

  I guess my mom decided that if she couldn’t come to the courthouse, she’d show up at my house and cook me dinner. Even though I was a thirty-six-year-old man, it felt good knowing that Mom would fly all the way up to support me. My mom lived in Florida with her new husband Joe, who I couldn’t stand. It wasn’t that Joe was such a bad guy. It’s just that he was a bad guy for my mom and I hated the thought that he was always trying to replace my dad. But that’s another story.

  I opened my door expecting to see good old Mom stirring a pot, watching Who Wants to Be a Millionaire? on the TV Instead I was greeted by dozens of white glimmering candles and Luther Vandross on the stereo. The small kitchen table was set with two long white candles illuminating the very elegant table setting, highlighted by a dozen white roses in a white vase. Speaking of roses, on the floor was a trail of rose petals that led down the hall to the bedroom. I walked over to the stove and lifted the lid off one of the smaller pots. I was tempted to reach in and take a taste when I saw that it was spicy cabbage, my favorite vegetable. Spicy cabbage and ox tails? Someone was going to a lot of trouble to impress me, and by now I was pretty sure it wasn’t my mom. The rose petals and the candles were a pretty sure tipoff to that, and the Luther Vandross on the stereo was a dead give-away.

  “Val! I know you’re here.” When I didn’t get a reply, I put my briefcase down and angrily headed for my bedroom. It had been quite a while since I’d seen Val in person. But what I saw next made me put aside my anger and take a deep breath. Some women look nice in candlelight. Others look good in lingerie. But Val? Let’s just say Val had it goin’on as she lay on my bed wearing a sheer white baby doll nightie with feathers around the edges and a matching thong. To say she looked breathtaking in that candlelight was an understatement.

  “Hi,” she purred. “I was starting to think you weren’t going to come home.” She reached over to the ice bucket and poured a glass of champagne.

  “What are you doing here, Val? This is breaking and entering.” I folded my arms across my chest to show my displeasure, but I must admit it was getting mighty hard to be angry with a woman who looked so damn fine. She got up off the bed and walked over to me. The sway of her hips and breasts was even more enticing than ever and she knew it.

  “I’m here to apologize, Kyle,” she said in a sincere voice, handing me the glass of champagne. I smiled. As much as we’d been through, I had to admit it was good to see her. I thought she hated me, and for her to take the high road and apologize was truly honorable. Hell, I could totally understand her wanting an apology from me.

&n
bsp; “Apologize about what? You don’t have to apolo ...” She took her finger and placed it on my lips to quiet me.

  “I want to apologize for the way I’ve been acting lately. Especially the phone calls. It’s just that I missed you and I needed to hear your voice. I’m sorry.” She took a step closer and kissed me. I didn’t resist, so she did it again, this time parting my lips with her tongue.

  “Come on. I wanna show you something.” She grabbed my hand and led me into the kitchen where she lifted the lid of the big pot. The smell that came out of it was to die for.

  “About a month ago I called your mother and asked her for the recipe to those ox tails you’re always talking about. It took me a while, but I finally got all the ingredients to make some. You’d be surprised how hard it is to find freshly slaughtered ox tails. So when I found them I figured I’d come over and make you your favorite dinner. Kinda make up for all the trouble I’ve been causing you. Oh, and just so you know, I didn’t break in. I used my key.” She took a spoon and dipped it into the pot, offering me a taste, which I gladly accepted.

  “Damn, that’s almost as good as Mom’s.” I took the spoon out of her hand and dipped it in for another taste.

  “Well, thank you. I’ll take that as a compliment. Why don’t we sit down and eat? I’ve got a long, exciting night planned for you.” She licked her lips then lifted her head for a kiss. I gave her exactly what she wanted with no regrets. After the day I’d had, what she was offering was like a breath of fresh air, and as long as she didn’t mention Lisa or the divorce, we were straight. At least for tonight anyway.

  We’d been eating, drinking, and talking for the better part of two hours, and both of us had a little buzz. She’d even managed to make me laugh a few times, which was no small feat considering my mood lately. I was on my third plate of ox tails and about ready for a little dessert in the bedroom, especially since Val had been teasing me by massaging my inner thigh with her bare feet all night.