Married Men

by Carl Weber

  “Mothafucker, if you don’t get your fucking hands off my wife, I swear to God I’ll kill you!” I didn’t know about Malcolm, but Jay’s tone scared the shit out of me. I wasn’t afraid for my own safety. He’d never hit me in seven years, but I was definitely afraid for Malcolm.

  “Malcolm, go in the house,” I pleaded.

  “I told you. I’m not going in the house without you.” I turned around with an attitude, ready to curse him out. I hated what I was about to do to his ego, but if he didn’t realize it was for his own good, too bad. It was better than a beat-down by Jay.

  “Look, Malcolm, go in the house or go home! I’ve got to talk to my husband alone for a minute.” My eyes locked on his and I guess he knew I was serious, ’cause he turned and went back in the house without another word.

  “I’m telling you right now! I’m not standing out here if you can’t act civilized,” I warned Jay.

  “Aw’ight, I’ll be cool.” He took a deep breath and wiped his eyes. “Do you love him?”

  “I’m not sure I know what love is anymore. But I like him. I like him a lot.”

  “What about me? You love me?”

  “Yeah, Jay, I love you.” I wasn’t sure I should be admitting that, but I’d already said it, so I continued. “I’ll always love you. But that don’t mean we should be together. It’s time to move on.”

  “Why? If you love me and I love you, why can’t we just get rid of him so we can have our family back?”

  “You know why.”

  “No, I don’t.”

  “Do you remember what I asked you before you left?”

  “No, all I remember is you hitting me in the head with that vase.”

  “Well, I do. I remember it like it was yesterday. I think I’ll always remember it.” I let out a pathetic laugh. “I asked you if you loved her. And you said yes.” The memory still hurt. “Now I wanna know again. Do you love her?”

  He looked like I had caught him off guard with that question. Guess he wasn’t as scripted as I expected. He didn’t even have an answer. He just stared at the ground. Which was an answer in itself, as far as I was concerned. But I still wanted to hear him admit it.

  “Come on, Jay. It’s not that hard. It’s a simple yes-or-no question. Either you love her or you don’t.”

  “Yes, I love her,” he finally said.

  “That’s what I thought ...”

  “But I love you too,” he added quickly, though his tone was a little less convincing than before.

  “No you don’t. You don’t love me. You never have.” I took a few steps closer and stared him dead in the eyes so he would know I was serious. “I don’t know what happened between you and that girl, Jay. But I do know you came over here more out of loneliness than love. I’m falling in love with Malcolm, Jay. I might not be in love with him yet, but he’s a good man and I’m gonna give him a chance. You’re still in love with that girl. I won’t take you back out of pity just because you broke up. Now if you ever cared about me, you’ll give me a chance to fall in love.” I turned my back on him and went in the house. Thank God he didn’t try and stop me.

  Epilogue

  Wil, Allen, and I walked into the Roadhouse Bar together for the first time in six months and we were all greeted with handshakes and smiles. I must have heard “Where’ve you been,” or “I thought you were dead,” twenty times as we made our way to a table in the back where Jay was waiting for us.

  I have to admit, it felt good to be back in our old haunt. Since my release from the hospital, I’d spent most of my time with Lisa and the girls trying to make up for lost time. What time I had left, I’d talked the fellas into spending most of our free time at Benny’s bar instead of the Roadhouse. I’d - been avoiding the Roadhouse like a plague because I didn’t wanna run into Val. But word had leaked back to me that she and her ex, Terrance, had gotten back together and moved to her hometown in Virginia.

  “Damn, just like old times isn’t it?” Wil smiled.

  “Yeah, I guess,” I glanced over at the bar where Val used to work. Deep down I was gonna miss her. We’d had a lot of good times. It was just too bad things had gone so wrong between us. Truth is I had no one but myself to blame for that whole fiasco anyway. I shouldn’t have messed with her at all ’til I was sure things were over between Lisa and me.

  “What’s wrong, Jay? You look like shit.” Wil sat down next to Jay.

  “Nothin’,” Jay sighed sadly. Wil was right. He did look like shit.

  “What’s up bro? You okay?” I leaned my cane against the table and took my seat. I’d just about fully recovered from the accident, though I did have a noticeable limp that the doctors said would probably never go away.

  Jay sighed again as he showed us an envelope. “I got this from Tracy today. She had the baby last week.”

  “She did?” I raised an eyebrow, studying his face. I didn’t know whether to congratulate him or keep my mouth shut. “What’d she have?”

  “A boy. She named him Jason.” Jay tried to smile, but I knew he was hurting inside. He’d always wanted a son. Now don’t get me wrong, I’m sure he loved both his daughters, but there’s something special about a man and his son.

  “So? You happy about this or what?”

  “Of course I’m happy, Kyle. I’ve got a son, man. How can I not be happy? Do you know how long I’ve waited for this?” He waved the letter in the air. “What’s tearing me up is that Tracy won’t let me see him.”

  “What? Why not?” I asked angrily.

  “Some shit about she’s not ready for that. She can’t see me ’til she knows she’s over me.” Jay shook his head. “He’s my son, Kyle, I should be able to see him.”

  “You’re right, man. Maybe we should talk to Greg about it. He could ...” Jay raised his hand.

  “No, no lawyers.” He shook his head. “I’m not gonna take her to court.”

  “Why not?” Wil asked.

  “ ’Cause I love her. That’s why.”

  “Yeah, but Jay, you love Kenya, too. And you’re taking her to court for visitation.” Wil looked confused.

  “This is different, Wil.”

  “How so?”

  “I know I’ve acted like I was in love with Kenya, but I never really loved her. Not the way I love Tracy.” Jay hesitated, looking up at the ceiling misty-eyed. “I never knew what love really was ‘til I met Tracy. She’s changed me. I’m not the same ol’ player I used to be. Taking her to court would just send her the message that it’s over between us. And it ain’t.” Our conversation was interrupted by the obnoxious laughter of Judy, the waitress.

  “Damn, y‘all out on parole or what? I ain’t seen y’all together in months.” She kept talking without taking a breath. “And Kyle, I heard you were dead.”

  “No, I’m still alive and kicking, Judy,” I smiled at her.

  “Well, I’m glad to hear it. What are you boys drinkin”? The usual? ”

  “Nah, let us have a bottle of Moët,” Allen grinned. “Matter of fact, make it two bottles. Oh, and is the grill still open?”

  Judy glanced at her watch. “Yeah, it’s open for another hour.”

  “Good tell Lou to cook us up four of those twenty-dollar steaks he keeps hidden in the back. I want mine medium rare. How do y’all want your steaks?” He looked around the table at each of us.

  “It depends on who’s paying for it,” Wil laughed. “I’m broke. Diane’s got me on a budget.”

  “Don’t worry about that, Wil. I got you. Everything’s on me tonight, guys.” Mister Moneybags gave us all a broad smile and puffed out his chest.

  “Well, in that case, make mine well done, and I want two baked potatoes instead of one. With lots of sour cream and butter,” Wil ordered without hesitation.

  “I’ll have mine medium. And can I have some fried onions and mushrooms with that, Judy?”

  “Sure, Kyle. And what about you, Jay?”

  “Make mine like his.” Jay pointed at me.

  “Aw�
�ight. I’ll be back with your champagne in a minute.” Judy walked away.

  “What’s up, Al? You hit the lotto or what? I ain’t never seen you spend money like this.” I sat back in my chair.

  “I got the insurance check from Ma’s death today.” He paused, and we all remained quiet. Finally Allen grinned and continued. “But that’s not why I’m picking up the tab. I asked Cinnamon to marry me today and she said yes.”

  “Get the fuck outta here. Congratulations, Allen!” I grabbed his hand and pulled him in close. “I’m happy for you, man. Damn, I’m happy for you.”

  “Me, too, bro,” Wil smiled.

  “I’m happy for you, too, dawg.” Jay still sounded depressed.

  “So, when’s the big day?” I slapped Allen on the back again.

  “Hopefully, about four months from now. That’s about how long it’s gonna take for my divorce to be final from Rose.”

  “Damn, I keep forgetting you’re still married to her. I’m surprised Rose isn’t trying to contest the divorce.”

  “So am I. I was prepared to have to pay her off for my freedom, but she agreed to the divorce and to giving up her parental rights. The only thing she wants is to keep her engagement ring.” Allen laughed, and we joined him.

  “I just wanna be there ten years from now, when she gets out of jail expecting to cash in that ring and they tell her it’s a worthless piece of shit,” Allen said seriously.

  Judy brought over the champagne and handed Jay a folded-up napkin.

  “What’s this?” Jay asked.

  “Lady over there asked me to give it to you.” She pointed at the bar and we all turned. A beautiful, dark-skinned woman with long, shoulder-length hair waved.

  “Now, she’s fine,” I thought out loud.

  “Sure is,” Wil agreed.

  I turned to Jay.

  “What’s that?” I pointed at the napkin and he handed it to me. I looked down and read the short note.

  Hi, handsome. My name’s Tammy and I’d like to buy you a drink.

  “Well? What you gonna do?” I turned toward Jay and he smiled for the first time since we arrived.

  “I’m gonna go over there and let her help me forget my problems with Tracy. That’s what I’m gonna do.” He reached over and picked up one of the bottles of Moët and two champagne glasses. “If you gentlemen will excuse me.” He winked as he left to meet the dark-chocolate beauty.

  “I thought he said he’d changed?” Allen laughed. I watched Jay sit down at the bar and place his arm around the woman. He looked back and grinned at us.

  “Don’t let him front. He might be acting like he’s back to his old ways, all right, but that don’t mean he ain’t learned some lessons along the way. Hell, we’ve all learned some lessons in the last year. Six months ago Wil and I had our own apartments and were headed for divorce. You were happily married to Rose. Now look at us. Wil and I are back with our wives and you’re getting ready to divorce Rose and marry Cinnamon.” I glanced over at Jay and his new friend. “The way I see it, the more things change, the more things stay the same. That’s the way it is when you’re married men.”

  The following is a sample chapter from Carl Weber’s eagerly anticipated upcoming novel

  SO YOU CALL YOURSELF A MAN.

  This book will be available in January 2006 wherever hardcover books are sold.

  ENJOY!

  James

  Call me kinky, but there is nothing in the world that turns me on more than hearing a woman scream pleasurable obscenities as I make love to her. And that’s exactly what my lovely wife, Kathy, was doing as I held onto her hips and made love to her from behind for the second time tonight. Our two boys, James Jr. and Michael, were with my mother-in-law for the weekend while Kathy and I were taking advantage of their absence by spending some quality time together. We’d gone out to dinner, taken in a movie, then come home and finished off a bottle of wine before making love on the living room carpet. We were now on our second round in our bedroom, going at it like two lusty college students in heat.

  “I love you, James,” my wife moaned affectionately, clutching the sheets just as an orgasm overtook her body.

  “I love you too,” I growled back as my body stiffened and my own pleasure erupted.

  Totally spent, Kathy lay flat on her stomach while I gently collapsed onto her back, gasping for air. After a brief recovery, I slid my sweat-soaked body off of hers. She snuggled up next to me and I wrapped my arms around her, pulling her in close, her back to my front. I was so exhausted I wanted to just close my eyes and let the sedative of sex take me to dreamland, but I couldn’t do that because it as against the rules we’d created almost a year and a half ago to keep our marriage together. Somehow, I was going to have to force myself to stay awake at least ten more minutes and talk to her before allowing myself the enjoyment of sleep. I kissed her neck, whispering in her ear, “You okay? Do you want me to go down on you or anything?”

  “No, baby. I’m fine just like this. All I want to do is hold me.” I did as I was told and she snuggled her backside against me. A few seconds later I could hear her snoring lightly.

  I loved Kathy more than anything in the world. Sure, we had our problems like most couples. Hell, I even thought we were gonna break up a few years ago, but we worked it out and now things had never been better as far as I was concerned. I’d loved her since the day we met in our junior year at Virginia State University. She was my soul mate, and I’d do anything and everything to keep her and my boys safe and protected. I kissed her neck again then dozed off to sleep.

  I couldn’t have been asleep more than five minutes when the phone rang. Instinctively, I reached over and picked it up from my night table, glancing at the caller ID before hitting the talk button. The screen read Private Number, and my eyes wandered to the clock radio on my night table. One twenty-one A.M. Who the hell is calling me at this time of night? Then it hit me. There was only one person who would call me at this time from a private number—my fraternity brother, Sonny. He lived in L.A. and was flying in sometime tomorrow. I was supposed to pick him up at the airport, so he was probably calling to let me know what time his flight would arrive. Sonny always had a beer or two after dinner, so knowing him, he’d probably just forgotten about the time difference.

  “Hello?”

  “James?” It wasn’t Sonny as expected. It was a woman, a familiar voice, but in my tired state I just couldn’t make out the voice. “James?” the woman asked again.

  “Yeah, who is this?”

  “It’s ... it’s Michelle.”

  The hairs on the back of my neck stood up and every muscle in my body tightened. I could feel Kathy start to stir next to me and fear ran through my body. I immediately cupped the phone and rolled over on my right side, away from my wife.

  I’d met Michelle about two years ago during the time Kathy and I were having problems and contemplating divorce. She was living with her mother and their house was a daily stop on my UPS route. Her mother was addicted to the Home Shopping Network and was constantly ordering nonsense she didn’t need. Looking back at things, I wished I had never met Michelle, but in all honesty, she was exactly what I needed to realize that what I had at home was worth fighting for.

  In the beginning, I never even thought about having sex with Michelle. She was just the girl in a beat-up housecoat who answered the door when I dropped off her mother’s packages. But as time went on, her appearance started to change. At first it was subtle; the scarf she usually wore to cover up her rollers disappeared and her hair was now combed every day. Then one morning she started wearing makeup. I knew something was definitely up when she stopped wearing the beat-up housecoat and started to answer the door wearing silk pajamas or a negligee. Being a harmless yet flirtatious guy, I gave her a few compliments on her improved appearance. Yeah, I know I was a married man, and even though things with my wife were rocky, I really didn’t think anything would start with Michelle. I was just seeking some attention. That
changed, though, when she was more than a little receptive to my flirtation. We started flirting back and forth over the next couple of weeks. I don’t have to tell you what happened after that. Let’s just say it happened every day for six months, even when I didn’t have any packages to deliver to her house.

  “I thought I told you not to call me on this phone.” I was whispering but my voice was cold and serious.

  “I know, but I’ve been calling your cell since five o’clock and it just keeps sending me to your voice mail.”

  “That’s because I’m busy.” I glanced at Kathy to see if I was talking too loud. She seemed to still be asleep.

  “You don’t have to get nasty, James. What is wrong with you? Is your wife right next to you?”

  “Yes. Now look, it’s late. Don’t call me anymore, okay?”

  “No!” she shouted. “We need to talk now. I really don’t care if you wife is there or not. I need to talk to you.”

  I didn’t like her attitude and was thinking about hanging up. The only thing that stopped me was the fact that she could call back. One call at 1:30 in the morning Kathy might ignore or sleep through, but a second call would have her radar up like she was NASA waiting for the space shuttle to land. “Look, I don’t have time for this.”

  “Well, make time. Unless you want me to show up at your doorstep with your son.”

  I swear I could feel my heart stop. “Hold on a sec.” I cupped my hand over the phone then swung my feet off the bed to sit up. Kathy turned toward me.

  “Baby, who’s that on the phone?” She was still half asleep.

  I turned toward her and forced a smile. “Oh, it’s just Sonny. I’ve gotta write down his flight information. I’ll be right back.”

  “Aw‘ight. Tell ’im I said hi.” She rolled back over, pulling the covers around her neck. I left the room, heading downstairs as quickly as possible. When I reached the family room, I turned on the television for background noise and brought the phone to my ear.