The Survivor

by Rhonda Nelson

  “You’re just saying that because I’ve half starved you,” Lex said, dragging a French fry through a puddle of ketchup.

  “Yes, but you fed me in other ways,” she said, sliding him a look. Ways that she had thoroughly enjoyed. He’d fed a different kind of hunger, one that she knew wasn’t going to be satisfied anytime soon. Whether they were compatible in any other way, she knew for certain they were dynamite in bed. They’d come together explosively. And she’d savored the blast.

  Having missed room service, they’d showered, then Lex had taken Honey and gone to a local restaurant to get dinner. While he was out, Bess had reviewed the maps again and, even though it was late, had called a couple more of her clients to alert them to the possible threat.

  No one had heard from John Smith, which made her more than a tad nervous.

  Of course, it could have been that, like them, he’d merely stopped for the night, but she worried all the same.

  Finished eating, Lex threw the last bite of his own hamburger to Honey, who ate it gratefully, then he wiped his mouth with a napkin and tossed it on his plate. “I think I’d better check my email,” he said. “See if I’ve got anything from Payne yet.”

  That reminded her. “I called Mrs. Handley while you were gone and got her email address so that we could forward the pictures Brian sends to you and see if any are a match.”

  “Mrs. Handley has an email address?” he asked, surprised.

  “Doesn’t everybody nowadays?”

  He bent forward and kissed her forehead. “You are brilliant.”

  She smiled, pleased. “You’d already thought of it, hadn’t you?”

  “I had, but that doesn’t matter. We have the same goal, after all.”

  Her lips quirked with droll humor. “I don’t remember you being so open-minded about that this morning.”

  “That’s before I had sex with you,” he explained.

  If she’d been eating something, she would have choked. “I’m sorry?” she said, shaking her head. “Tell me why that makes sense.”

  He pulled the laptop from the bag, opened it up and powered it on. The blue screen illuminated his face, making her belly tighten with need again. “It doesn’t have to make sense. I’m a man, remember? I only know what I know.”

  “Ah,” she said. “How about I take a crack at it then? Because we’ve had sex and you’ve effectively pounded me into submission with your penis, you no longer feel emasculated by my efforts to help?”

  He looked up at her, a comically cautious expression on his face. “There’s no right answer here, is there? If I say yes, I’m a Neanderthal. If I say no, then I’m a liar.”

  She merely shook her head. “What am I going to do with you?”

  He waggled his brows suggestively. “Bad things?”

  They’d already done bad things. Twice. And they still had the rest of the night to get through. Though it was ridiculous—she’d just bared every inch of her body to this man—she felt sort of funny about crawling into bed with him and sleeping. She’d never slept with anyone, ever, even as a child. She’d never had sleepovers or gone to other people’s houses and she’d always had a bed to herself. Freakishly, the idea of sharing one with someone was almost more intimate than what they’d just done.

  Ridiculous, she knew, but she couldn’t help it.

  As for her other sexual partners, she’d always been at the guy’s house but never spent the night, preferring to go home to her own bed. She’d often heard people talk about spooning and cuddling—romanticizing sleeping in the same bed—but she wasn’t completely sure she was going to like it. Once more her gaze slid to Lex, who was deep in concentration. Of course, if she was ever going to like it with anyone, she imagined it would be with him.

  Honestly, she didn’t know what it was specifically, but something about him affected her on a level she’d never felt before. Was she sexually attracted to him? Her lips quirked. That, she was certain, had been established. But it was more than sex. Much like Honey, she wanted to be closer to him, wanted to listen to everything he had to say. She loved the deep timbre of his voice, the way those beautiful eyes crinkled at the corners when he smiled.

  Though she’d barely met him, she knew instinctively that he was an admirable man, that he was good and decent. He was the kind of person who adopted a stray, who smiled indulgently when she danced with an old widower who needed cheering up. A man who would see this job through to the end because he’d said he would. He was smart and funny, unbelievably sexy and gorgeous, and she loved the way she felt when she was with him. As though he held some secret part of her and she was only complete when she was near him.

  And if that wasn’t dangerous, then she didn’t know what was.

  Because she didn’t want that, ultimately. She didn’t want to allow her happiness to get so tangled up in someone that she’d rather die than live if something happened to them.

  Like her mother.

  Her mother had been so devastated after Bess’s father had died that she hadn’t wanted to live at all. Bess remembered very little from that time, but she did recall foraging for food in the kitchen while her mother slept. Getting herself ready for school, packing her own lunches, such as they were. Had her clothes been clean? Probably not. But she’d known enough to get herself dressed and outside to catch the bus.

  She didn’t remember a single tender gesture from her mother after her father died. She’d retreated into the world of her own misery, and other than the scribbled apology at the bottom of her suicide note, she hadn’t thought about her daughter.

  If that was love, then Bess didn’t want any part of it.

  Her grandfather had told her later that her mother had always been “fragile.” Bess wasn’t exactly sure what that was supposed to mean or why it would have made her feel better, but in a strange sort of way, it had. He’d also said she was more like her father and she’d taken comfort in that. In knowing that she was more like the stronger parent.

  “All right,” Lex said. “There are eight pictures here with names and addresses. If you’ll give me Mrs. Handley’s email address, I’ll forward them to her.”

  Bess walked over and peered at the faces on the computer screen, trying to discern from their looks which one, if any, was the culprit. There were a couple of really seedy-looking characters, but then she felt bad for thinking that. She didn’t know their circumstances or what sort of hand life had dealt them. Who was she to judge based on a photo from the DMV?

  She rattled off the address and he sent the file. “She probably won’t look at it tonight,” Bess told him. “And it’s really too late to call.”

  “Maybe call her in the morning then and let her know the message is there?”

  She nodded. That sounded good.

  “We’ll see what she says before we head out in the morning. If she can ID him, then we can call Payne and find out everything we need to know.” He paused and a frown wrinkled his smooth brow.

  “Is something wrong?”

  He shook his head. “Nothing I can put my finger on, but something about this doesn’t feel right.”

  “What do you mean?”

  He grinned at her and shook his head. “That’s just it. I don’t know. I feel like I’m missing something.”

  She laughed and quirked a brow. “Developing the sight, are you?”

  “Nah,” he said. “I’ll leave that to Elsie.” He paused again and for the first time he seemed a bit nervous.

  And then it dawned on her—he wasn’t used to sharing a bed with anyone, either, and was every bit as nervous about it as she was. For whatever reason, this heartened her more than she would have believed.

  “Wanna see if anything good is on television?” she asked.

  He nodded. “I don’t suppose you like ESPN?”

  “No.”

  “Damn. You just lost your shot at earning The Perfect Woman title,” he teased.

  Bess plopped on what she decided would be her side of the bed and
aimed the remote at the TV. “I don’t suppose you like Britcoms?”

  “About as much as having my balls snatched off with red-hot pinchers,” he said, startling a laugh out of her.

  She heaved a dramatic sigh. “Well, hell. You just lost your shot at earning The Most Forward-Thinking Man award.”

  Lex slid into bed next to her and hauled her closer to him. She snuggled in and relaxed against him, contented in a way she hadn’t expected.

  “Perfect women are boring,” he said on a sigh, giving her a squeeze.

  She smiled. “Forward-thinking men are over-rated.”

  His chest vibrated beneath her cheek as he chuckled, then the bed shifted and he laughed harder.

  She lifted her head to see Honey sprawled on his far side and felt her lips twitch. She should have known that Honey wasn’t going to stay on the floor, that she’d want to be by Lex. “Is she jealous or is this a regular occurrence?”

  “A regular occurrence. Do you mind?”

  “Not at all. If Severus were here he’d be curled around my head right now…with his ass in your face.”

  “Nice,” he said, laughing softly. “I can tell you I’d definitely have a problem with that.”

  “Cats are clean,” she said, stifling a yawn. “In fact, he cleans his ass all the time. I see him do it.”

  He laughed again, the sound warm and familiar. “Be that as it may…”

  She found a sitcom they both agreed on, then she settled more firmly against him, strangely content. And when she awoke the next morning, his chest was bellied up to her back, his arm around her waist, her breast in his hand.

  He was definitely a spooner…and she rather liked it.

  9

  THOUGH HE FELT LIKE THEY should be on the road—should be moving, at the very least—Lex realized there was no point to pressing forward until they knew what direction to head. Bess had called several of her clients last night and, as of this morning, none of them had heard from John Smith. They’d each been asked to call if he did show up, so until the phone rang there was really nothing they could do.

  And it was driving him crazy.

  Rather than sit inside the hotel room where Bess and the bed seemed to loom large, he clipped Honey’s leash onto her collar and told Bess he wanted to walk her for a bit before they got back into the car. That was true, of course, but he also needed to take a minute to get a little perspective, because at some point over the past twenty-four hours, he’d lost it.

  Big-time.

  This morning he’d awoken with her hair in his face, her sweet rump against his groin and a luscious handful of breast beneath his palm. That had been a first. He’d never physically spent the entire night in bed with a woman. He’d either left hers for his own or sent her on her way. In all honesty, despite the fact that he’d had the most wonderful, mind-blowing, phenomenal sex in his life, something about sleeping with Bess had felt more…significant.

  He wasn’t altogether certain what was happening to him, but he grimly suspected he was getting increasingly more invested in her than was wise. His head was still a mess from the near-death experience—though the nightmares were fewer and far between, he still occasionally had them—and he’d just started a new job. He didn’t have the time to give to a new relationship, even one as sexually satisfying as his and Bess’s. He felt like a bastard for even thinking like that. It wasn’t like he’d bedded her and wanted to bail.

  Just the opposite, really.

  He suspected that he’d want to spend more and more time with her, to explore the relationship, and that was a luxury he couldn’t afford right now. In addition, though he knew he was going to love working for Ranger Security and anticipated becoming good friends with the men there, he still wanted to do something more. To find that purpose he’d been searching for his whole life.

  Being in the military had fulfilled the need somewhat, but not to the extent he knew it should. Did he doubt that his service benefited the greater good? No. And he was proud of his contribution. But he wanted something more. He wanted to do something on a more personal level. He exhaled mightily and watched Honey eye a squirrel with entirely too much interest for his comfort. Lex smiled at his dog. He hadn’t been kidding when he told Bess that he thought everybody needed a pet. Honey had certainly been good for his overall mental health. Too bad some of the other wounded soldiers hadn’t had the same benefit, he thought, going still at the idea. His heart rate kicked up and his skin prickled, alerting him to the fact that he was on to something special, something that certainly bore thinking about.

  But not at this moment. Right now he had to think about Bess and what the hell he was going to do with her.

  Or without her, as it were.

  And, really, if all of the reasons he’d listed to avoid a relationship with Bess sounded thin and superficial, it was probably because they were. But he had a hard enough time admitting the truth to himself, much less her, so he was going to stick with the superficial excuses for as long as he could.

  How could he tell her that he’d been secretly glad to come home? That he’d been terrified of getting shot again? Of dying before he’d truly lived? That he was afraid that when the time came, his fear might keep him from reacting as a man should? How did he know that he wouldn’t be a coward?

  That was ultimately the problem, Lex realized suddenly.

  It wasn’t so much that he was afraid to die—it was that he might not be able to act in time to save someone else. How could he confess those things to her when he could barely admit them to himself?

  As for what Bess was thinking, who knew? He’d caught her staring at him a couple of times with the most puzzled expression on her face, as though he were a new species or an antique she’d never come across before. In that regard, he imagined that she was every bit as skittish about their newfound attraction as he was. Though she’d been incredibly responsive and open in bed, he’d still gotten the impression that she hadn’t had very many partners and, given the fact that she was the most interesting and beautiful creature he’d ever seen, he figured that had to be by choice. So…why? Why hadn’t anyone snapped her up? Why was she still single? Her choice?

  For reasons that escaped him, he thought yes.

  Which naturally begged the question again—why? Why would she choose to be alone? Why hadn’t she snagged a husband and produced a pair of beautiful children?

  Even though he knew it wasn’t wise, these were questions he was going to have to find the answers to. He wasn’t going to be able to help himself. Much like a crossword, she was a puzzle he desperately had to figure out. He wanted to pick her brain apart and find out what made her tick. Without a quid pro quo, of course.

  As for this case, there was absolutely no reason at all why he should be pulling a weird vibe, but he was feeling it all the same. Though he’d been over everything backward and forward and was certain he wasn’t missing anything, he couldn’t shake the sensation that there was another element waiting to pop out and bite him in the ass. The feeling had him looking over his shoulder and second-guessing his decisions, made him antsy as hell. He was a doer, not a waiter, which Bess had noticed this morning and had teased him about. With that droll quirk of her lips that habitually set his groin on fire, she’d offered to go find him a dragon to slay.

  He grinned, unable to help himself. Hell, he’d probably smiled more over the past twenty-four hours than he had in the past six months. And he’d certainly felt more alive, no doubt from the extra blood flow through his body.

  Bess came around the side of the building and waved, then pointed to her cell phone. “We got a call,” she said in carrying tones.

  Every muscle went tight and he gave a quick tug on the leash to make Honey turn around. “Come on, girl,” he said, anticipation making his fingers twitch with excitement. A break, at last.

  “Mrs. Handley looked through the pictures this morning and ID’d our guy,” she said. “His name is Harold Yeager and he’s got a Bluffton addres
s.”

  He frowned. Bluffton sounded familiar. And if he remembered correctly it wasn’t very far from Albany.

  “It’s about an hour west of Albany,” she said.

  Lex nodded grimly. “So he went home last night. He’s been slowly making the trek back down south and then west.”

  “I think he must have missed Chester’s address,” she said. “Otherwise he would have gone there before heading toward Valdosta.”

  He silently agreed. “I know we need to get on the road, but I want to take a few minutes to do some research on Mr. Yeager,” Lex told her.

  She nodded. “Of course.”

  They had just gotten back into the room when her cell phone rang again. Lex pulled his laptop out of the bag and listened as Bess took the call.

  “Mr. Johnson? He was? How long ago did he leave?” She smiled, seemingly satisfied. “Thanks so much for letting me know and, again, I’m so sorry about this. Yes, sir,” she said. “I’m sure Princess did you proud.” She laughed at something the older man was telling her. “You give her an extra treat from me,” she said. “Thanks again.” She disconnected and looked over at him.

  “He was just in Pansey,” Bess told him. She hurried over and looked at the map. “Which means that he’ll probably go to Ashford next and then on to Dothan.”

  A few keystrokes later he’d pulled an entire history on Harold Yeager. He smiled and beckoned her over. “He is a mechanic,” he said, glad that his hunch was right. “He lives in the apartment above his shop. He’s forty-three. Recently filed bankruptcy, not married, no dependents. Sells spare parts and yard-sale finds on eBay.”

  She nodded, impressed, and sent him an admiring glance. “How did you find all this?”

  “You’d be amazed at what you can find out about someone on the internet.” He studied the map for a moment. “I think we need to skip ahead directly to Dothan and nab him there.”

  She was still looking at the computer and gave her head a shake. “This is incredible.”

  He grinned at her and shrugged. “This is nothing. Give me a few more minutes and I could know his credit score, his cholesterol levels and whether or not he’s got any overdue books from the library.” He popped the lid closed on the laptop and then jerked his head toward the door. “Come on,” he said. “We need to get moving. We’ll grab breakfast on the road, if that works for you.”