by Lisa Shelby
“Poor kid is all on his own and trying to get a job so he can support himself and his younger brother. As soon as he turned eighteen last week, his grandma left them on their own. He has an aunt and some cousins that don’t have room for him, so he’s on his own with his brother for now. I left him my card and let him know that if he needed anything he could call.”
“Shit! We have to find a place for him. This is all my fault Jonathan.” Her voice trails off as she speaks the end of her statement.
“Sweetheart, this is not your fault. Not only are you required to report abuse in your line of work, but you got him out of a violent situation and maybe even saved his life. You have enough of your own shit going on to worry about him too. I gave him my info and I promise I will keep checking on them. I told him you wanted to see him back at school if possible. It was clear you mean a lot to him.”
“There has to be something we can do for him. I could move into Ireland’s room and Jesse and his brother could have my room. Wait…I could probably lose my job if I did that! Shit! This is a kid’s life we’re talking about though. Shit! Shit! Shit!”
Now, she’s up and off the couch, pacing the room. She’s fidgeting with restless energy. She pulls her hair up and into a messy bun then she pulls that out and lets it fall. Two-seconds later it’s in a ponytail high up on her head and then it’s back down again. Where do these hair bands even come from? Watching her is amazing and exhausting all at once. She cares so much about this kid that she isn’t even thinking about her own situation.
“Emily, come here,” I say using my forefinger to summon her to me.
She comes back to the couch and sits next to me, facing me with her knees pulled up to her chest while she worries her necklace.
“Sweetheart, do you have class today or any homework you need to get done? I can take care of Ireland if she needs anything.”
“No class today. I have a paper I should be working on but there’s no way I can focus on that right now. My brain hurts trying to figure out who’s doing this to me, how to protect my baby girl and how to help Jesse.”
“Why don’t you take some time off work until we figure this out? Just focus on school and Ireland.”
“I can’t take care of Ireland if I don’t have a job. You have no idea how lucky I am to have a part-time job that includes benefits. I have to have benefits, Jonathan. You just never know what could happen, and I can’t lose this job. Besides, I won’t let these bastards win. Fuck them if they think they’ll scare me away from my job.”
That’s my girl.
Chapter 28
Emily
It’s Tuesday morning and I’m sitting at my desk staring blankly at my computer as I wait for the students to start arriving. I should be getting my day organized and checking my emails, but I can’t stop daydreaming about yesterday and how great Jonathan was. He took care of me all night. He slept next to me and just held me. He didn’t make any moves, and I didn’t feel any pressure from him. He simply held me and took care of me all night long.
The more time I spend with him the more I realize that he isn’t just this hot guy that I had a whirlwind romance with. He is an amazing man. Genuine. Thoughtful. Kind. Last night he cooked dinner, took care of the dogs, read Ireland her bedtime story and then took care of me the rest of the night. He could have taken advantage of my emotional day, and tried to push things further in my vulnerable state, but he didn’t. Instead, he rubbed my shoulders and then slept on the top of the bed covers with my head on his chest. He rubbed my head and stroked my hair until I fell asleep, just like he did every night that we shared a bed in California.
The last thing I recall before falling asleep was him kissing the top of my head and saying, “Goodnight, Gracie.” The next thing I know, my phone is buzzing with the sound of my alarm and I’m still in his arms. I reach over and slap the alarm off, but he quickly pulls me back into our spooning position and puts his nose in my hair and takes a long sniff.
“God, I love the way you smell.”
I love his morning voice. His voice is already deep and sexy as hell, but add the rasp that comes with him just waking up and my panties practically fall right off.
Before I’ve had a chance to respond back to him, he pulls my hair to the side exposing my neck and kisses me gently.
“I’ll go get the coffee started and you hop in the shower. Want me to make you anything for breakfast?” He says as he gets out of bed still fully clothed from the night before. It looks like he slept with just the throw blanket I keep on the edge of my bed. He stayed on top of those covers all night. Damn.
“I’ll just have some cereal when Ireland has hers. Thanks for getting the coffee started and thanks for last night…for everything really. Not sure how I would have gotten through yesterday without you.”
“I’m glad I could be there when you needed me, but there really isn’t a thank you needed. I would have been losing my mind if I wasn’t able to help, so it was really more for me than for you,” he says with a wink. “Now get up, beautiful, and get in the shower.”
I never knew that little things like eating breakfast together or talking over a cup of coffee each morning could mean so much, but they do. Who knew there were really good men like him out there? I guess I did, but I never thought I would find him again. Now, it looks like it’s up to me to decide if I am going to walk away again, or take the risk of a broken heart and being let down.
Alex, Cami and I always say no regrets. I think it’s time I start actually living my life to match our motto. Let’s face it, today could be my last so I might as well start kicking some ass.
The bell rings and snaps me out of my thoughts of the beautiful man that I am so in love with that I can’t even find the words to tell him. I don’t really even have the balls to tell myself half the time. I was able to admit it to Cami with two shots in me, but sober in the light of day and I can’t get it out.
“Hey, Miss Jacobs.” Austin says as he walks in and puts his back pack on his desk. He looks over his shoulder and signals to the cute little brunette waiting in the doorway to class. Miss J, I want you to meet my girlfriend, Kayla.”
Kayla walks into the classroom and puts her arm through Austin’s arm, but doesn’t say anything in the way of a greeting. She seems really shy, but totally in love with Austin. It’s very sweet to see them together.
I put my hand out and say, “Nice to meet you. I’ve heard a lot about you from Austin and it’s nice to finally put a face to the name.”
At the sound of me saying that Austin has talked to me about her, her face lights up with pride. She shakes my hand and says, “Me too.”
We all stand there quietly after our handshake, so I remind the kids that class is about to start.
“Well, Austin class is about to start so we should probably get things settled and ready to go.”
“Sounds good, Miss J. I’ll be right back.”
He walks Kayla to the hall outside the door that leads to the main hallway and gives her a kiss goodbye. She looks at me over his shoulder, gives me a little wave and a smile and walks away.
“So glad she could finally meet you. I’ve told her all about you and how you helped Jesse. She thinks it’s cool there’s a teacher around here who actually cares about all of us misfit toys.”
It makes me feel good to see a kid like Austin so happy. Ah, young love.
“There are lots of teachers that care, Austin, you just haven’t given them all a chance.”
He simply shrugs, gets his things out of his bag and settles into to his chair.
“She’s really sweet, Austin. Thanks for introducing us. You guys must balance each other out because she seemed really quiet and then there is you.” I joke.
He gives a little chuckle and says, “She’s just a little shy. Who knows, maybe she was star struck? You are my favorite teacher, after all. Okay, you’re the only teacher I like, but that’s kinda saying something. She was glad to meet you, trust me. She’s the on
e, Miss J. We’re already talking about getting married when we graduate. I’m glad you finally met her.”
After the couple of classes that I have in the morning and some one-on-one math work with Austin, I do a little work in the office making some copies and getting some things done for Heidi. Basically busy work, but I’ll take it. I know I’m lucky to be assisting in the SPED program here, and I want to soak up as much as I can from her while I have the opportunity.
I pop into the staff lounge to rinse out my coffee cup real quick. Before I head out, Coach Barnes enters the room. He does his usual flirty hello, but then leans against the counter and says he’s heard what’s going on with the threats, and to let him know if I need anything. I thank him, but I’m a little embarrassed. I wonder who said something. As far as I know only Heidi, Blackburn and the principal are aware. I hate to think that the staff is talking about me. This is not the way I want to get noticed at work.
I return to the classroom, organize all the paperwork I just copied for Heidi and get her set up for her next class. I gather my things and head out the door to where Jonathan should be waiting for me, since he won’t let me drive myself to work. I know that he’s worried and being overprotective, but at some point he will have to go back to work and he won’t to be able to drive me every day. If I’m being honest with myself though, I love it. I love every minute with him and I plan on enjoying every minute with him that I can. Time to start living today like it’s my last!
I walk out the school doors and there they are; my two favorite people. I can’t contain the smile that spreads across my face at just the sight of the two of them together. Ireland is in the truck with the window down while Jonathan stands on the outside of the truck with his shoulder leaning against the door. They’re clearly in deep conversation. Ireland sees me and starts smiling which causes Jonathan to turn around and there they are…those dimples. What a great feeling to know that Ireland and I have brought those dimples out to say hi again.
I think we’re helping him just as much as he’s helping us. I see that light in his eyes slowly coming back, and I feel it inside me as well. He was the light in my darkness when I met him all those years ago, and today we seem to be the light in his darkness too.
Chapter 29
Jonathan
I’m starting to realize it’s the little things in life that really matter. One of those things is bringing a smile to one adorable four year olds face. Seeing her reaction to me picking her up yesterday has had me itching for the same thing again today.
As I pull my truck into a spot in front of Ireland’s school, I’m shocked at just how truly excited I am to pick her up. I guess knowing somebody is equally as happy to see you will have that effect on you. It’s kind of addictive actually.
When I get there I sign in at the desk so that I can check Ireland out. The moment she sees me, she comes running towards me with her blonde curls bouncing around her perfect little face. She hugs my leg real quick, then heads to her cubby to get her hoodie and back pack, and comes running back to me.
After losing Shell, and then my mom, I have felt like a shadow of myself. I’ve spent years barely getting through my days without feeling anything. No real joy, anger, love or fear. Not having a sense of fear in my line of work just isn’t safe, and I can see now that some of the situations I’ve put myself in at work were because I didn’t have that fear or care that anything might happen to me. This little one and her momma, though…they make me care…make me want to be safe.
As we walk to the truck with her tiny little hand in mine I say, “So Princess, you ready to go get your mommy?”
“Yep.”
When I buckle her into her seat, she’s right there face to face with me and I see a look I’ve never seen on her face; one of concern and maybe apprehension.
Searching the perfect little features of her face I cautiously ask, “Is something wrong, Ireland?”
“No,” she whispers.
“You know you can tell me anything, Princess.” I try again.
She just looks at me unsure but doesn’t speak. I give her space like I know her mom sometimes needs and she waits until I am in the driver’s seat to speak. It’s almost like not being face to face is easier for her.
“Mommy seems sad. I was finkin’ we could get her a yummy and that might make her feel better.”
“You think that will do the trick?”
“Yes, and I know just what she loves, Jonafon!” she says with confidence.
“A cake pop?”
“Yes! Pink and sprinkles! How did you know?”
Yep, when it comes to Emily my brain is a steel trap. I haven’t forgotten a thing. While I’m happy that I still know her as well as I once did, I’m more concerned that this sweet little thing thinks her momma is sad and needs to be cheered up.
“Sweetheart, why do you think your momma is sad?” I ask as I pull out of the parking lot.
“Because at bed time she squeezed me extra-long and I fink hers was crying when she left me at school today.”
Shit!
“Okay, then I think you’re right Princess. She needs a cake pop!”
She is young, yet so wise. It’s clear that this mother and daughter are close, and that Emily clearly can’t keep much from Ireland no matter how hard she tries. There is no way to explain to Ireland what is going on because it would scare her to death, and I’m sure Emily feels helpless in this situation. Threatening notes and pictures just aren’t things you share with your four-year old, and I don’t think it’s my job to tell her. I’ll leave that to her momma. When I find out who is doing this, I am going to tear them limb from fucking limb.
Not sure how I missed the tears this morning, but I did wait in the truck while she dropped Ireland off. She must have gathered herself before coming back out of the building. Emily is strong, but she isn’t invincible. Even tough momma’s like Emily can only take so much.
Ireland is in the cab of the truck but unbuckled while I lean my shoulder against the truck door and gab with her through the window. This kid never stops talking. She talked all the way to Starbucks, but got silent when we went through the drive-thru to order our cake pops. As soon as we had cake pops in hand, she started up again and hasn’t stopped since.
She’s told me about her favorite teachers, favorite kids, least-favorite kids and who doesn’t wash their hands after they go to the bathroom. I know that today they started working on their Thanksgiving play that they will give next month, and that she gets to be a pilgrim. She says the show is top secret though and that is all she can tell me. She did ask me if I would come to watch her in it, and I told her I would love to! It’s the truth, I really can’t wait!
Ireland has a cake pop in each hand and I have one as well. I can tell the moment that Emily walks out of the school doors because Ireland’s eyes light up. She puts her cake pops behind her back and whispers. “Mommy’s comin’, Jonafon!”
I take this as my cue and hide my cake pop behind my back as well. When Emily gets within a couple of feet of us Ireland yells. “Surprise, mommy!” and holds both of her cake pop filled hands out the open window.
“For me? Both of them?”
“We got one for each of us, but you can have mine mommy.”
Emily taps Ireland on the nose and says, “One is all I need, baby girl. Thank you. This is just what I needed.”
She then turns her attention to me and says simply, “Thank you.”
I shyly pull my cake pop out from behind my back and Emily takes one of Ireland’s. I bring my cake pop towards them and say, “Cheers, ladies.” We all tip our cake pops together until they touch and the girls say cheers back to me. After we all take our first bites, I can’t help myself when I moan.
“Damn, these things are good!” I’m savoring each bite of my tiny dessert when I hear Ireland call me out.
“Mommy, Jonafon said a bad word.”
“He did, but he’ll try to be careful in the future, right, Georgia?”
“Right, Gracie. Sorry about that, Princess.”
I walk around to the driver’s side of the truck while Emily buckles Ireland back in, and then joins me in the front of the cab finishing her cake pop. Once again, Ireland waits until both Emily and I are in front of the truck’s cab before she asks her question.
“Momma, why you call him Georgia and he calls you Gracie?”
Emily’s cheeks turn an adorable shade of pink, but she looks me in the eye and smiles while she says, “Baby girl, those are nicknames. Kind of like how I call you Baby Girl and Uncle Mick calls you I. When I met Jonathan a long time ago, before you were born, he told me he was from the state of Georgia. So when we became friends way back then, I gave him the nickname of Georgia. He calls me Gracie…”
I interrupt her because I want to take this one. “I call your momma Gracie because it’s my way of letting her know how special she is to me. When I met your momma she told me a story about your great-grandparents and that story was about how her grandpa called her grandma Gracie to make her feel special. I want your mom to know she is just as special to me as her grandma was to her grandpa. I call you Princess because you have reminded me of a princess since the first time I met you. And you just happen to be the cutest little princess I have ever met!”
“Oh, okay.” Ireland says simple as that. I look at her in my rearview mirror and I see a smile break out across her adorable face when she confesses. “I like it when you call me Princess.”
“I like it when your momma calls me Georgia so I know just how you feel, little one.”
Emily doesn’t speak but she does lean over and take my hand and doesn’t let go until we reach our next destination. That’s enough for me.
The rest of the afternoon is filled with all sorts of little things. Boring, mundane things that all of us need to do on a daily basis, but having this dynamic duo with me sure makes it all that much more enjoyable.