Hiding Behind Love

by Karly Morgan

  “Ya kids these days, always in such a hurry.” Earl shook his head and chuckled. “And Bonnie’s all right with this whirlwind, is she?”

  “She’s over the moon. She adores Carissa and is thrilled ta have another female around,” I told him, and we both shared a laugh, while Carissa smiled and Karlene huffed in indignation.

  “Oh I just love your mama! She’s a great woman,” Carissa said, and I heard just how true those words were, making my heart stutter in my chest for how short a period of time we’d all have together as a family. Mama’s heart would only hold out for so long without that transplant, and the drugs could only do so much to keep it going.

  “That Bonnie sure is a firecracker,” the mayor agreed with a hearty nod. “I remember she used ta be so timid when we were kids, always hidin’ in the background. If I’d known there was that spunk in her, I’d have been chasin’ her when we were teens. She sure was a pretty thing back then.”

  I raised an eyebrow at the mayor’s last statement, not sure whether him chasing my mama would’ve been good or bad, considering how things had turned out. I shook my head, clearing those thoughts from my mind. Things had a habit of working out exactly how they were meant to, so there was no use imagining other scenarios.

  “Lord knows your daddy didn’t deserve her,” Earl said sadly, shaking his head. “The only good thing that ever came from that man was Kolton.”

  “Thank you, sir,” I told him, wishing he hadn’t brought up the drunk who’d donated the sperm that created me. I still wished it was Caleb who’d fathered me.

  “Well, I’m a firm believer that each of us have a purpose in life. If his was to create this fine man I’m about to marry, then I’d say he succeeded,” Carissa spoke passionately and gave me an adoring smile. Earl smiled warmly at her and nodded his head in agreement.

  “You are not marryin’ him,” Karlene declared, hands on her hips, stepping forward to inject herself into the conversation once more. I shook my head, wishing she’d just go away already.

  “I believe ya have no say in the matter, sugar pie. Ya had your chance with him and ya blew it sky high. I tried convincin’ him to give ya another chance, but like the self-respectin’ man he is, he wouldn’t hear of it,” Earl told his daughter, disappointment clouding his voice.

  I didn’t know if it was in her for what she’d done or me for not giving her another chance, but he cleared that confusion up pretty quickly.

  “I have ta say, I respect him for standin’ his ground and not givin’ in ta the pressure ta take ya back. He deserves better than how ya did him.”

  I saw the confused look on Carissa’s face as her gaze bounced between the three of us and knew I’d have to fill her in on the sordid tale but didn’t look forward to it in the slightest.

  “Oh please. I made one little mistake and have ta pay for it the rest of my life?” Karlene scoffed angrily. “I’m only human.”

  “Y’all have a good rest of your day. I’m gonna take Karlene here home and see if I can get her head screwed on straight again, ‘cause apparently she’s got a few entitlement issues ta work through. Lord knows I tried hard ta keep her grounded in reality and on the right track, but apparently, I failed somewhere along the line. I promise she won’t be botherin’ ya anymore. Congratulations again,” Earl said as he offered his hand to shake both mine and Carissa’s before grasping Karlene’s arm tightly and steering her back toward his car. She didn’t go willingly, causing a scene that would send rumors flying faster than a bolt of lightning through the sky. Heads popped out from the doors of neighboring businesses and the windows above them to get their scoop.

  “I think that’s our cue to get inside,” I whispered in Carissa’s ear as people took note of our presence and the fact that the mayor was dragging his daughter, my ex, away from the two of us, kicking and screaming obscenities.

  “I think that’s an excellent idea,” Carissa agreed, and we ducked into the store without another look back. I hoped Earl would be able to talk some sense into his daughter but had a sinking feeling he wouldn’t have much luck. Not wanting to think about my ex any longer, I focused my attention on the dark-haired beauty on my arm.

  “Now, whatcha needin’ from here?” I asked, ready to get back on the road for home. There was a reason I tried not to come into town very often. It was tiring as hell dealing with everyone’s nosiness.

  Chapter Fifteen

  Carissa

  Bonnie was napping in her recliner when we returned from town, so I headed up to my room with the few things I’d purchased at the drug store. Kolton had fought me tooth and nail about changing my hair color, but I wasn’t budging. At least until I took a hard look at myself in the mirror.

  “What in the hell made me think I could pull off blonde with my skin coloring?” I held the box up next to my face, trying to imagine the color of the model’s hair on it as my own hair color and failing miserably.

  “I love your dark hair, baby,” Kolton said, taking the box from my hand and putting it back on the shelf. “You’re my very own Snow White. ‘Sides, everyone ‘round town already knows ya have dark hair, so if anyone shows up askin’ questions, you suddenly bein’ blonde ain’t gonna change their answers. Don’t allow your daddy to have that much power over you. The people here are good. Trust in them and trust in me to keep ya safe.”

  The sincere look in Kolton’s eyes as he argued his point in the store helped me to finally change my mind about dying my hair. To cement my decision, I threw the box of coloring into the trash can, stripped out of my clothes, and climbed into the shower. When the box hit the trash can, an immense sense of relief washed over me just before the water hit my skin. Kolton was right. If I went as far as changing my appearance, I was giving my father power over me and my decisions. The whole reason I’d left was because I was fed up with him making all my decisions for me, as if I didn’t have a working brain of my own or the ability to make good and logical choices. He didn’t trust and believe in me, while Kolton did. Bonnie did.

  A smile lifted the corners of my mouth as I finished my shower and stepped out, thinking about the family I’d accidentally stumbled into. No matter how close and connected I felt to them already, they were still strangers to me but had not only had they opened their home, they’d opened their arms and their hearts to a girl Kolton had found sleeping like a vagabond behind the hay bales in their stables.

  I wrapped the towel securely around my mid-section, not having brought any clothes in with me, and headed to my room. Kolton had said he’d either be out checking on the ranch or cooking dinner when we’d parted ways in the kitchen, so I didn’t worry about bumping into him on the short trip.

  I slid into a pair of shorts and tank top over a sports bra before tying my hair up into a ponytail that hung almost all the way down my back, hoping to ease the discomfort from the stifling heat and humidity. If it got this hot regularly here, I’d have to consider cutting my hair to help keep it off my neck, although I’d only cross that bridge out of necessity. Maybe taking a few inches off wouldn’t be so bad.

  When I felt I was presentable enough, I headed back downstairs to find Kolton relaxing on the couch and discussing finding an officiant for the wedding.

  “I’ll make a few calls,” Bonnie promised him with a broad smile, not having noticed me quite yet. Kolton’s eyes widened when he spotted me, causing her to twist her head to look. His lips parted, and I wasn’t sure if his reaction was good or bad, based on the fact he wasn’t uttering a word.

  “Well?” I asked, stepping forward so Kolton could see that I hadn’t gone through with dying my hair. His grin spread wide, and he lifted his arm to beckon me over to sit next to him.

  “I’m glad ya didn’t go through with it,” he told me sincerely, and that made my chest swell with an emotion I didn’t want to face, so I turned my attention to Bonnie.

  “How was your nap?” I asked her as her eyes bounced between Kolton and me.

  “What am I missin’?” s
he asked, crossing her arms over her chest and giving both of us the stink eye.

  “Carissa had some crazy idea that she needed ta dye her hair some god-awful blonde color to help disguise her from her father and whoever else the man sent lookin’ for her. I tried talkin’ her outta it back in the store, but she had her mind set,” Kolton explained, and Bonnie’s eyes widened. “Not sure what changed her mind after we got back here, but whatever it was, I’m glad for it.”

  “I’m glad ya didn’t either. Blonde’s not your color at all. Now a nice red woulda been perfect with your skin colorin’…” Bonnie mused, and Kolton gaped at her in horror.

  “You know…I thought about red, but it seemed like it would make me stand out more than blend in, so I didn’t even look at those,” I replied, enjoying watching Kolton’s mouth open and close like a fish gasping for air.

  “Sometimes ya gotta go bold ta blend in, darlin’.” Bonnie nodded her head as she spoke, and I saw the twinkle in her eyes as we continued our banter.

  “Maybe I’ll pick out a nice red the next time we go to town,” I mused, cocking my head in thought but making sure I could still see Kolton out of the corner of my eye. He looked as if he was about to pop a blood vessel.

  “Oh, cool your heels, boy. We’re just teasin’ ya. Based on the fact she didn’t go through with it, ya said somethin’ right.”

  “Gee, thanks,” Kolton muttered, sinking back into the couch cushions, sulking. “Just what I need, my mama and my bride-ta-be gangin’ up on me.”

  “It was just a little good-natured fun,” I said, fighting back laughter at how pitiful he was trying to look and failing miserably at it.

  “Apparently, my boy left his sense of humor back in town somewhere. Maybe y’all need ta drive back there ta find it,” Bonnie suggested, giving Kolton a pointed look.

  Kolton just glowered at her, and my laughter burst free. It felt so good to laugh again. I couldn’t even remember the last time I’d truly laughed like this. It wasn’t even that funny, yet there I was, cracking up hysterically. It took a few minutes to settle down and pull myself together. My face heated as I realized I’d been the only one laughing.

  “Now that was the most beautiful sound I heard in a while.” Bonnie nodded her head while smiling broadly. “Ya really need ta do that a lot more often.”

  Kolton just sat quietly beside me. I refused to look his direction but could feel the heat of his stare warming me.

  “I can’t believe I just did that,” I groaned.

  “It’s a good thing. It’s been a tough day all around and ya needed ta release some of it. Laughter’s a great way ta do it,” Bonnie reassured me. “We need more of that ‘round here. I’m tired of the doom and gloom that’s been hangin’ over this place since the doctor told me I was sick. Hopefully soon, we’ll have the sound of children’s laughter fillin’ the place.”

  I froze in place at Bonnie’s suggestion. Kolton and I hadn’t even discussed how we were going to approach being married to each other as practically total strangers. I’d never even considered whether I wanted to have children.

  “Gettin’ a bit ahead of yourself there, Mama?” Kolton choked out, and I could hear in his voice he was having trouble with Bonnie’s statement as well. Good to know I wasn’t the only one.

  “Well, I ain’t gettin’ any younger, and I’d love ta have some grandkids ta spoil before God calls me home, which doesn’t leave the two of ya much time ta get started.” I watched her cross her arms over her chest and lean back in her chair, staring both Kolton and I down as if she expected us to jump up and race to one of our rooms and get started on her request right then and there. “It’s not like the two of ya aren’t attracted to each other. Ya can feel the sparks flyin’ when y’all get within twenty feet of each other. It’s like someone set off a California wildfire with the heat of lust surroundin’ ya.”

  “Mama! You’re jokin’, right?” Kolton exclaimed, sitting straight and staring at her as if he couldn’t believe what he was hearing. Somehow, I wasn’t shocked at all by the words coming out of her mouth.

  “Don’t ya use that tone with me, boy. I’m just tellin’ it like it is. And no. I’m not jokin’. I want grandkids, and the two of ya are my only option for gettin’ ‘em.”

  Her satisfied look and Kolton’s horrified reaction had me fighting back another round of laughter. I felt as if I should say something, but my mind drew blanks on what an appropriate response would be. It was too busy circling the question of whether I wanted children, and even more importantly, if I wanted to have them with Kolton. My ovaries were actively screaming “YES!” while my brain was desperately trying to analyze every possible scenario.

  “Don’t ya think that’s somethin’ Carissa and I need to discuss and decide for ourselves?” Kolton tried with forced calmness.

  “Well, I suggest y’all get to it then. I’ll be right here workin’ on my afghan.” Bonnie picked up her project and immediately set to work, dismissing us. I stared at her and shook my head. I’d never met anyone like her, and she never failed to amaze me with her fearlessness when speaking her mind. I wished I could be more like her.

  “Why did ya feel ya needed to dye your hair so badly?” Kolton turned to me and asked as if Bonnie hadn’t just ordered us to go start producing babies for her to spoil. “Didn’t you think I’d be able to protect ya?”

  “It’s not that…”

  “Then what is it?” Kolton asked.

  “My father’s a high-powered divorce attorney who caters to only the wealthy. I’m sure he could figure out a way to nullify our marriage if he put his mind to it. I’ve seen him do some nasty things to get his way,” I told him, the topic of babies fleeing my mind and fear beginning to pool in my gut once again.

  “Divorce, gah! What happened ta stickin’ things out and makin’ ‘em work? Fixin’ what’s broken instead of just tossin’ it in the trash as if it never mattered,” Bonnie injected with a disgusted look on her face. “No wonder kids today don’t appreciate a damn thing. Not even marriage vows are held sacred anymore.”

  I didn’t know what to say, so when Kolton caught my hand and tugged me back to sink down into the cradle of his arm, I didn’t fight it. Being close to him felt good—too good. He gripped my hand tightly in his other one, laying our joined fingers on his muscular thigh. My fingers itched to run up and down the length of his leg, memorizing every nuance.

  Kolton turned his head and caught my eyes with his, a similar desire burning bright in his own eyes, but thankfully, Bonnie didn’t seem to notice that neither of us were paying the slightest bit of attention as she carried on her rant. The topic of children began bouncing around my head once again. I’d bet Kolton would make an amazing father.

  “When ya make vows of ‘til death do us part’ ta each other and God, ya don’t go back on ‘em. It’s not just a legal binding but a spiritual one that links that two of ya in a bond greater than man,” she said vehemently, but I only heard what she was saying as background noise. I was lost in Kolton’s gaze, wondering about the changes I’d seen in him just since that morning. I’d forgotten to ask him why he’d suddenly agreed to marrying me.

  “Ma…” Kolton groaned as Bonnie relentlessly vented her thoughts and feelings about how easily people could nullify their marriage vows. I’d guess he’d heard this spiel more times than he could count.

  “I know I taught ya better than that,” Bonnie concluded, staring Kolton down intently as if she were daring him to argue with her.

  “That’s why I haven’t married yet,” he assured her, which brought a smile to her lips.

  “Ya know the vows the two of ya are about ta exchange are just as sacred, whether your relationship started out in the traditional manner or not, right?” she asked, quirking her eyebrow in a silent question as to whether we’d agreed behind her back to end our marriage as soon as I was safe from my father’s plans.

  “Yes, Ma,” Kolton told her, meeting her stare head on, destroying my plans to s
uggest just what she was making us promise not to do: get a divorce when things were safe. I felt bad tying Kolton to me for the rest of our lives, if that’s not what he truly wanted. I hadn’t been on board at the beginning, but the idea of being Kolton’s wife was beginning to grow on me, the acting in town becoming less acting on my part toward the end and more real than I could’ve imagined.

  Bonnie seemed content with only Kolton promising not to dissolve our marriage and relaxed back into her chair. Did she not realize that I could file for one just as easily as Kolton could? I wasn’t about to ask and draw unwanted ire in my direction. Besides, did I really want to divorce Kolton when things were safe? Images of babies kept popping into my mind, leaning the answer more toward a no rather than the yes it should have been. Damn Bonnie and her meddling.

  “So, tell me about your trip ta town,” Bonnie requested, her eyes moving between Kolton and me as she waited for one of us to speak. I didn’t even know where to begin, so I let him take the lead.

  He ran through the entire thing, relaying the messages he’d been asked to and filling her in on the backstory we’d created, which brought a proud smile to her face, with me chiming in from time to time to add in a detail or two he’d missed and showing her the ring, to which she smiled and nodded her approval, when he got to that part. She didn’t seem at all happy to hear about Karlene giving us a hard time, though.

  “Good ta see y’all are thinkin’. I gotta admit, I hadn’t even thought of that part,” Bonnie admitted, and Kolton stared at her as if she’d grown another head. “What? I’m not perfect.”

  “Coulda fooled me,” he teased her, and she waved her hand at him while chuckling softly.

  “I’m glad it went well. It seems y’all have sold the townsfolk, which was an uphill battle. The two of ya musta played off each other rather well.” She sounded as if she’d had no doubt whatsoever that we’d have convinced people we were madly in love. I wondered if maybe she believed it herself or wanted desperately to, so she didn’t have second thoughts about her drastic decision. After her earlier description of the chemistry between Kolton and me, I’d bet she truly believed we were already well on our way to falling in love and committing to this marriage the way she wanted us to.