Text Me Baby One More Time

by Teagan Hunter

  He grits his teeth together and hisses, “Yes.”

  I point the spatula at him. “I’ll believe it when I see it.”

  He rolls his eyes in response.

  “How does this involve me?”

  “My parents and Zach have come to accept AJ as another member of the family over the years since he moved out here. They’ll be at the wedding for sure, and I want you to be my date.”

  “No.”

  My response is instant. Final.

  There is no way in hell I’ll be attending a wedding with Shep.

  Especially not with Shep.

  A charity event? Sure. We’ll be in a professional context the whole time. There’s no way anything could go wrong there.

  But a wedding? The most romantic setting of all? No way, no how.

  Why would I do that? To remind myself of everything I don’t have?

  I flip the pancake, ignoring Shep.

  Moments later he pushes off the counter and past me.

  “Where are you going?” I say before I can bite my tongue. I’ve been hoping he’d leave since he got here, so why would I want him to stay now? And what is with my body betraying me today?

  “I’m leaving.”

  “We’re not done discussing this.”

  He stops and turns toward me. “But we are. You said no to one of my conditions—no deal.”

  “Shep, I cannot go to Allie and AJ’s wedding with you.”

  “Why not?” He appears calm and collected, but I know better as he stalks back toward the counter, his hazel gaze intense. “I’m not asking you to marry me, Den.”

  God, do I hate how much his words sting.

  Hate how my heart begins to thump in my chest and my entire body sags with the overwhelming weight of his words.

  I slide the pancake from the skillet and onto the waiting plate, pouring more batter in its place.

  “It’s not even a real date,” he continues, speaking like he didn’t just shatter my heart in two all over again. “Besides, we’ll already be paired up the entire night as best man and maid of honor. What’s the harm in being my date, especially when it gets you that interview and probably that promotion?”

  He has a point…and I hate that he has a point.

  I particularly hate that I’m actually considering saying yes. I could use that raise. I could use that foot in the door.

  More than that, I deserve both.

  What’s the harm in one night anyway?

  “I…”

  I can’t say it.

  “Last chance, Denny,” he says quietly.

  I close my eyes and exhale a steadying breath, trying to summon up some courage.

  I vowed I’d never get caught up with Shep again, not when I know how damaging it can be.

  But that was six years ago.

  I’m a whole different person now. What if Shep is too? What if he’s not lying about changing?

  And what if who we are now is better than who we were then?

  “I’ll do it.”

  He beams at me, the glow of victory spreading across his cheeks.

  “Great. I’ll see you next Friday night.”

  “For what?”

  All too quickly, he reaches over the counter, plucks the pancake from the plate, and winks at me before taking a bite and heading toward the front door to leave…finally.

  “Our first date,” he calls over his shoulder.

  I groan. “How many events are there going to be, Shepard?”

  “Five.”

  “Five?!” I screech.

  “Yep.” He pulls open the door. “Pick you up at seven. Wear something sexy.”

  I chuck the spatula at his stupid grinning face and listen to him laugh the whole way down the hall.

  What have I gotten myself into?

  SIX

  Six years ago, September

  Shepard: Are you at the nerd shop?

  Denver: STOP CALLING IT A NERD SHOP!

  Shepard: All I’m saying is my big brother is the biggest nerd I know and even he doesn’t hang out at comic book stores.

  Shepard: So, yeah, YOU’RE A NERD.

  Denver: THEY HAVE FREE WIFI!

  Shepard: Uh huh. Sure.

  Denver: God I hate you.

  Shepard: Liar. I think you’re actually starting to look forward to my texts.

  Denver: I’m really not.

  Shepard: So many lies leaving that pretty mouth of yours.

  Denver: Pretty, huh?

  Shepard: What? I’m a teenager with eyes, hormones, and an always-half-hard dick. Yes, you’re hot, Den.

  Shepard: Don’t make it weird.

  Denver: I won’t.

  Denver: You’re hot too, Shep.

  Shepard: You just made it weird.

  Denver: EYE ROLL EMOJI

  Shepard: You know you can just use the emoji, right?

  Denver: I don’t know how!

  Shepard: You, my technology-deprived friend, are sad.

  Denver: I can still block you, ya know.

  Shepard: Oh, did you finally figure that feature out? Look at you, getting all fancy with the technology! Gold star for Denny!

  Denver: Allie showed me, you ass.

  Shepard: I kind of figured.

  Shepard: Wait…did she ask who you wanted to block?

  Denver: It’s Allie—she’s nosy as all get-out, so yes.

  Shepard: What’d you tell her?

  Denver: What do you mean? The truth. Why would I lie?

  Shepard: Did she say anything?

  Shepard: About us…talking, I mean.

  Denver: No.

  Denver: Should she have?

  Shepard: No. At least I don’t think so.

  Shepard: It just surprises me.

  Denver: Well, she did say one thing but it’s so stupid and it will never, EVER happen, so it’s not worth repeating.

  Shepard: I’m sitting on the edge of my fucking seat here, nerd.

  Shepard: Tell me.

  Denver: Apologize for calling me a nerd and I’ll think about it.

  Shepard: No. It’s the truth.

  Shepard: Wait, no—you’re right. I’m so sorry for calling you a nerd, Den.

  Shepard: Clearly, you’re not a nerd. You’re a geek.

  Denver: Hate. You.

  Shepard: Lies!

  Shepard: Now tell me.

  Denver: She said…and I’m quoting this so don’t get mad at me for the name…“Wouldn’t it be, like, so cute if you and Slug started dating? Then you two would be together forever like AJ and me. OH MY GOSH, DENNY! We could have a DOUBLE WEDDING!”

  Denver: Then there was a lot of squealing and gagging happening.

  Shepard: I’m going to assume the gagging was you trying not to puke at the thought of us getting married?

  Denver: No. It was Allie because I choked the shit out of her to get her to shut up.

  Shepard: DAMN! You’re dark, Den.

  Shepard: I like it.

  Shepard: Maybe we SHOULD think about this double wedding thing…

  Denver: Don’t think I won’t choke you too.

  Shepard: Stop pretending to hate me.

  Denver: Never.

  Shepard: I think I’ve figured out this whole AJ being a dumbass wanting to propose to Allie in high school thing.

  Denver: Yeah? Hit me with it.

  Shepard: Convince him not to propose and to instead give her a promise ring.

  Denver: Like promise to be virgins until marriage?

  Denver: You know it’s way too late for that, right? Those two bang like rabbits.

  Shepard: Trust me, I know.

  Shepard: But no, that’s not a promise ring, that’s a purity ring. A promise ring is more like a…pre-engagement ring.

  Shepard: A promise of “forever”.

  Denver: Hmm…I think this could work.

  Denver: I also just want to point out that some people DO have a FOREVER.

  Shepard: A very, very small number of people, as at leas
t 50% of all marriages end in divorce.

  Denver: Your optimism is the highlight of my day.

  Shepard: So you’re saying texting with me is the highlight of your day?

  Denver: If that’s the way you need to spin it, sure. We’ll go with that.

  Shepard: Oh, it’s spun all right.

  Shepard: Anyway, I’m going to talk to AJ about it tonight. I know you already told Allie…do you think she’d freak if AJ changed it to a promise ring?

  Denver: No. I’ll just lie and tell her I got them mixed up.

  Denver: Easy peasy.

  Shepard: Lying to your best friend is that easy?

  Denver: I lie to her all the time. She always asks me if the outfit she’s wearing looks good and I always say yes.

  Denver: Spoiler alert: it’s a 50/50 shot.

  Shepard: I’m 97% certain you just broke girl code.

  Denver: *shrug* It’s worth the extra 30 minutes we don’t spend going through her closet for another outfit.

  Shepard: SHAME!

  Denver: Shep?

  Shepard: Yeah?

  Denver: Shut up.

  Denver: I’m a little jealous of what Allie and AJ have.

  Denver: There. I owed you a secret.

  Shepard: Well, you’re about to owe me another one…

  Shepard: I’m a little jealous of them too.

  Denver: GASP! You? Shepard Clark, the cynic?

  Denver: Do I have the wrong number?

  Shepard: Don’t you tell anyone!

  Denver: I’m shocked.

  Shepard: That I want companionship?

  Shepard: Just because I don’t believe in forever or tying myself to one person for years and years doesn’t mean I’m a robot and have no feelings or needs.

  Shepard: It’d just be nice to have…someone, ya know. Not necessarily a traditional relationship, but someone I can talk to and count on to always be there. And someone I can kiss on the regular.

  Denver: What about your “girlfriend”?

  Shepard: Penny is great, but I can’t really make out with her anymore.

  Denver: Your fake girlfriend’s name is Penny? That’s awfully close to Denny…

  Shepard: Don’t remind me.

  Denver: You said “anymore”. I’m gonna need details.

  Shepard: Penny and I used to ACTUALLY date.

  Denver: What happened?

  Shepard: We had sex.

  Denver: I’m sorry but…WHAT?

  Shepard: We lost our virginity to one another, Penny realized she was gay, and that was that.

  Denver: Is this why you don’t believe in love? Because you turned your first girlfriend into a lesbian with your terrible sex?

  Shepard: First, rude. Second, it’s an interesting theory, but no.

  Shepard: I don’t not believe in love, just not forever.

  Denver: Right, but your feelings are totally changing.

  Shepard: Oh, are they now? Why is that?

  Denver: Because you’re totally falling in love with me and wanna spend the rest of your whole life with me. It’s why you bug me every day.

  Shepard: Don’t make me laugh, Den.

  Denver: Admit it—you’ve been thinking about our double wedding.

  Shepard: You should see the scrapbook I have for it.

  Shepard: Our colors are outfield green and baseball stitches red.

  Denver: You know, I can see that being exactly what you want.

  Shepard: Let’s not forget our venue: the comic shop, right near the Captain America comics because he IS the hottest Avenger.

  Denver: Is this your way of saying you’ll be my Bucky? Because we ALL know Cap and Bucky are secretly lovers.

  Shepard: AHA! You ARE a nerd!

  Shepard: And no, because I call dibs on Captain America. You can be MY Bucky.

  Denver: Deal, but only if you say it’s forever.

  Shepard: “It’s forever.”

  Denver: Shep…

  Shepard: Fine, Den. Forever. You’ll always be my Bucky.

  Shepard: I like Sinatra.

  Shepard: Actually, I hardly listen to any modern music.

  Shepard: Now you owe me another secret.

  Denver: I honestly think that might have been the most shocking thing you could possibly say to me.

  Denver: I, too, like Sinatra and don’t listen to modern music, though not by choice. There’s your secret.

  Shepard: That doesn’t count!

  Denver: Are you kidding me? The only person who knows we’re not allowed to listen to modern music is Allie. That most certainly counts as a secret.

  Shepard: Fine. I think it’s a cop-out, but I’ll allow it.

  Shepard: I’m curious though…what kind of music did you think I listen to?

  Denver: I don’t know…Justin Bieber? Yeah, you totally seem like you have Bieber fever.

  Shepard: I’m starting to rethink our wedding album…

  Denver: You said forever, Cap.

  Shepard: Forever, Bucky. Forever.

  SEVEN

  SHEPARD

  “I’M HERE TO SEE DENNY.”

  The receptionist sitting behind the counter drops the pen he’s holding, and the phone glued to his ear almost slips from his grasp as his jaw hits the floor.

  “I am going to need to call you back, Henry. There’s a…well, someone important is here and I’m sure his time is worth a lot more than yours.” He slams the phone down on the receiver and beams up at me. “How may I help you, dear?”

  “Good morning…” I glance down at the nameplate on his desk. “Eric. I’m here to see Denny.”

  “Denny?” He purses his lips. “Ah, yes. Miss Andrews?” He leans forward, moving the pen between his fingers with curious, excited eyes. “Are you on her appointment book for the day?”

  I quirk a brow. “I’m not, but I have a feeling I can talk you into making an exception for me.”

  He laughs, tossing the pen onto the calendar covering his desk and pushing his chair back to stand. “You’d be right. I’ll take you to her.” He struts around the desk. “Follow me.”

  Eric leads me down a hallway filled with fingers clacking against keyboards, shouts for more coffee, and a flurry of people bustling from desk to desk.

  Tucked away in a corner in the back of the building, Denny’s head is bent over her laptop, her eyes glued to the screen.

  It reminds me of college, the two of us working on the school paper together.

  I’d have to talk my dick down every day watching her work her magic in that computer lab. It didn’t matter that she ignored me every chance she got; that never stopped me from watching her every moment I could, because watching Denver was pure gold.

  She loved working on the paper, loved the chance to get creative, to voice her opinion while still giving the facts. She was a master at it, a far better writer than I ever was.

  Wearing headphones, she’s completely absorbed in whatever’s on the screen in front of her, so she doesn’t hear us approach.

  Eric waves a hand across the screen and she nearly jumps out of her seat at the unexpected interruption.

  “Dammit, E!” she shouts, hitting the space bar and pulling her earbuds out. She glares up at him with annoyance. “It’s a good thing I’m wearing a panty liner—I just peed a little bit!”

  He chuckles. “Sorry, but you have a guest.”

  Finally, she spots me standing behind him, and her face pales.

  I can’t help but serve her my famous grin. “Morning, Den.”

  Groaning, she drops her head into her hands and mutters, “Eff you, universe. Eff you.”

  She takes another moment to compose herself before looking back up and smiling sweetly—it’s false sweetness, by the way—at Eric.

  “Thank you for bringing him over here. I’ll take it from here.”

  He turns to me and sticks his hand out. “It was great meeting you, Mr. Clark. I’m a huge fan of your baseball pants.”

  “Eric!” Denny admonishes.
<
br />   I burst into laughter and shake his hand.

  “Thank you for the compliment. It was great meeting you. I’m sure I’ll be seeing you a lot in the upcoming weeks.”

  His perfectly groomed brows shoot into his hairline as he looks between me and Denny.

  “And why’s that, Mr. Clark?”

  “Didn’t you hear? Denny and I are a thing now. We’re—”

  “You ass!”

  Denny launches out of her chair, clambering around her desk—I’m certain she hits her hip on the corner—and covering my mouth with her hand.

  “Not. Another. Word,” she instructs through clenched teeth.

  I laugh against her palm.

  She gives Eric another falsely sweet smile. “Thanks, Eric. So much.” Her words drip with sarcasm. “I’ll let you know if we need anything else.”

  The receptionist shakes his head and laughs, heading back to his station, probably not wanting to be witness to Denver maiming me.

  I can’t blame him. For someone so tiny, she sure can pack a punch.

  Denny returns her attention to me, hand still covering my mouth, eyes ablaze.

  “I will murder you in your sleep, Shepard Clark. I don’t give a shit if you’re some hotshot baseball player or not.”

  I lift a brow in response.

  “Don’t test me. Tell me you’re not going to test me.”

  I dart my eyes down to her hand.

  “I don’t trust you. Shake your head up and down if you promise not to test me.”

  I do.

  “Good. Now—”

  Before she can finish her sentence, I dart my tongue out and lick her palm, laughing as she wrenches it away in disgust. She groans and wipes her hand against her jeans.

  “I am so going to get fired for murder.”

  “Just fired? Not jail time?”

  “If it goes to trial, I’ll just explain how obnoxious you are. I’m certain I’ll be able to sway several jurors in my favor.”

  “Not if the jury is mostly women.”

  “Those poor, delusional women.” She wipes her hand on her jeans again like she can’t get rid of the feel of my tongue against her skin. “Why are you here, Shep?”

  “Dress shopping.”

  “Excuse me?”

  “For tomorrow. Our date.” I sigh. “Don’t act like you forgot. I know you’ve been counting down the hours.” I glance at the watch on my wrist. “We’re down to thirty-three now, in case you were wondering.”

  “I’m not going shopping with you.”