Inside Game

by Collette West

  But it's her quiet presence that soothes me like nothing else can.

  "What title?" She nudges me with her toe, gazing up at me expectantly.

  "Girlfriend?" I quirk an eyebrow at her.

  "I thought I already had that one in the bag." She frowns at me, pretending to be mad.

  "Hmmm. How about super fan?" I reach over to the bedside table.

  "Super fan?" she huffs. "That sounds more like a demotion."

  I chuckle at her honesty. "I don't know. I kind of like it," I tease, running the cap of the Sharpie over the curve of each breast, watching her eyelids flutter.

  "What are you doing?" she laughs, getting ticklish.

  "Taking a trip down memory lane," I reply, gliding it between the swell of her breasts.

  "I think you're just out to torture me," she groans.

  "Then take a good look at what I'm torturing you with," I urge her, my heart in my throat.

  She knits her eyebrows together. "A Sharpie?"

  "Not just any Sharpie," I reply, waiting her out. Then I stop moving it along her skin, allowing her to concentrate.

  She stares at it for a minute, humoring me. The cap is chewed and mangled just like it was the day I took it from her. It's all dried up. It doesn't even write anymore. But it's my most prized possession, and it will kill me if she doesn't remember it.

  She sits up in bed, and I can't contain my excitement as I witness it all come back to her.

  "That's not…?" she asks.

  "It is," I respond, grinning from ear to ear.

  "Let me see it!" she cries, grabbing it out of my hand and examining every inch of it. Her eyes light up when it starts to hit home. "No way."

  I think I've scored big time until she scrunches her face up and begins dabbing at her eyes with the corner of the sheet.

  "Eva, what's wrong?" I ask, but she only cries harder, so I take her in my arms, unsure of what I did to upset her.

  I stroke her hair as she rests her head on my shoulder and takes some ragged breaths while sobbing her heart out. I hold her until she quiets, kicking myself for having been an idiot and making her cry. I don't know what she's thinking, and that's what's freaking me out.

  "Are you okay?" I whisper, kissing the top of her head.

  "Okay?" she wails.

  And now, I know I've really done it, but I need her to tell me exactly what I've done wrong.

  She tips my chin down, bringing her lips to mine, giving me the most tender, heartfelt kiss imaginable, pouring her entire soul into letting me know how much I mean to her. My heart expands in my chest with every movement of her lips.

  When she breaks away, I beam down at her. "So, you're not mad at me?"

  "Mad? How could I be mad?" She playfully swats my arm. "That is the most wonderful thing anyone has ever… Drake, you're telling me you held on to it all this time?"

  "I have," I say, kissing her forehead, unable to keep my lips away from her.

  "Why?!" she practically screams at me.

  I chuckle. "Because you were hot."

  "So you must have a whole locker full of them, then," she busts me.

  "No, just that one," I reply, not wanting to joke about this.

  "Then why didn't you ask for my number?" she pouts.

  "Because I was married at the time," I remind her.

  "Like that would have stopped you."

  I scratch the back of my neck, sticking to the honesty thing that's worked for us so far. "I didn't want it to be like that…with you."

  She tilts her head to the side, her gorgeous hair falling against my chest. "So, you had a secret crush on me, huh? Looking for me whenever I'd come to the games?"

  I feel my face grow hot, having never done anything like this for a woman before. She has me by the balls. I just hope she's gentle with me.

  "And I never told you"—she pauses, and my heart lodges in my throat—"that I still have the hat you signed for me too."

  I blink, letting her words penetrate that inner corner of my soul I've never let anybody reach until now, unable to contain the smile that's spreading across my face.

  "Remember how I said that you were too special to be with just anybody?" she asks, making every nerve in my body stand on end.

  "Yeah," I reply, my voice rough and deep.

  "Well, I'm the luckiest one of all because you chose me even before you knew my name." She smiles at me, wiping away the tears of joy that are streaming down her face.

  "Eva," I whisper, pulling her into me and kissing her with all the love I have for her.

  I never thought I'd get this lucky. I never thought I'd get a second chance with someone like her. I'm so glad she didn't give up on me when so many others had. She was the one, and I knew it from the minute I saw her. Nothing has ever felt so right, and one day, I hope to bestow on her the most precious title of all.

  Wife.

  Chapter Thirty-Six

  Drake

  Step Ten

  Continue my inventory. Promptly admit when I'm wrong.

  I stride through Kings Stadium next to Eva, a few hours before the game. This is my first home stand back in the Bronx, and I'm frustrated that I haven't been playing up to the standard I set for myself. But I'm working on it. I'm just glad I didn't walk away from baseball when I threatened to. I would've hated myself if the last time I played in front of the New York fans was when I was high out of my mind.

  So far, they've welcomed me back with open arms, even giving me a standing ovation on my first night back—something I wasn't prepared for. Chase and the guys talked to the media a lot while we were on the road, encouraging the fans to come out and show their support once we rolled into town. All of them made it a point to emphasize how much I'm a part of the team and how excited they are to have me back in the lineup.

  It's still challenging for me to manage the natural highs and lows of daily life. For instance, right now, I have so much adrenaline flowing through my veins that I decide to channel some of it by getting on the first guy I see—Jake Woodbury.

  "Hey, Woodchucker, I heard that you struck out with that girl you were seeing." I bump his shoulder with mine and keep walking, hugging Eva closer to my side.

  Jake doesn't even respond. He just drops his head like he's still down in the dumps about it.

  "You shouldn't be rubbing it in his face like that," Eva scolds me.

  I look down at her, giving her a naughty grin. "Hey, I've changed, but I'm no angel."

  "But maybe you should cut him some slack," she urges. "I was sitting by my friend, Carrie, at last night's game and she said Jake's not taking it well at all. I guess he really liked Roberta."

  I shake my head. "Well, he was the only one who did. That girl's a real bitch."

  Eva slaps my arm. "Drake!"

  "What?" I mutter. "She is."

  "Well, she's gone to Texas now, so she'll be out of everyone's hair," Eva responds.

  "What's she doing down there?"

  "Apparently, Mike Landry's wife isn't doing well at all and could really use an experienced personal care aide. So the Heimlichs are sending Roberta down to his ranch to help out. Carrie said her sister is ready to fill in and take care of their grandfather until Roberta gets back."

  I glance at Eva. "Yeah, I knew Diane granted Landry a leave of absence from the team to care for his wife, but I didn't think it was that serious."

  "I guess the cancer spread to other parts of her body," she says softly. "She's going downhill fast."

  "Christ." I hold on to Eva even tighter. The thought of ever losing her is enough to scare the hell out of me, making me appreciate what I have even more.

  I missed out on a lot while I was away from the team. I didn't know that Landry's wife was in such dire straits. I thought he'd miss a couple of starts in the pitching rotation and be back mowing down the opposition for us in no time. But it doesn't sound like it. He's been thrust into a situation that makes my suspension look like a walk in the park.

  "Hey." Eva nu
dges my side. "Are you all right?"

  "Yeah. It's just a shock." I draw my eyebrows together, feeling guilty. "Now, I wish I'd kept my mouth shut instead of razzing Jake." I glance over my shoulder at him. "Sorry, Woodchucker. Just ignore me!" I yell back at him.

  He lifts his head in surprise, giving me a sad, little nod. I start walking again, but Eva stops, turns, and kisses me right on the lips.

  "What was that for?" I laugh, smiling down at her.

  She reaches up to caress my cheek. "Because the old you never would've said that."

  "It's all you," I whisper, leaning into her.

  "Well, how about extending your generosity even further?" she questions, looking up at me through her long, dark lashes.

  "I'm not going to like this, am I?" I groan.

  "Hear me out first." She places her fingers over my lips. "Willa and Coco are coming to the game tonight."

  I smile against her hand, and she smiles back at me.

  "So I want you to tell Karolina thank you," Eva says, driving a hard bargain.

  I lower her hand from my face. "And apologize for busting that douchebag's nose too, right?"

  "They had to postpone taking their engagement photo until the swelling went down," Eva tries to say with a straight face.

  I snicker, catching the gleam in her eye. "I'm not apologizing to fuckin' Tanner," I insist. "He came at me first."

  "I don't care what you do about Tanner," she replies, taking a deep breath. "I just want you to work at maintaining a civil relationship with Karolina so you can get to see your kids more often."

  After almost losing everything, I no longer feel as much anger toward my ex. I was wrong to extend my marriage with her when I should've ended it a whole lot sooner. All we did was argue. I'd pull away, losing myself in my addiction, making her even madder at me. In fact, I never should've married her in the first place. Willa and Coco are the only two good things to have come out of it. They may be living with Tanner now, but it doesn't mean I have to hate the guy. He's going to have it hard enough by marrying Karolina.

  "I just wish they didn't have to see me play when I'm not at my best," I grumble when I should be satisfied that they're coming at all.

  My bat speed has decreased, and I can't muscle the ball out like I used to. I'll probably never get back to the form I once had, but I'm taking it day by day, hoping to help the team in some regard, even if it's just moving the runner over and making a productive out. Every day, I'm working toward getting to where I need to be by the postseason, because there's no way I'm choking again when the spotlight's shining the brightest.

  "Karolina said they're just excited to see you out there," Eva says, easing my fears, knowing exactly what to say to me.

  She's even struck up a workable friendship with my ex-wife. Karolina trusts Eva with the girls for brief periods of time, even if she doesn't yet trust me. But I'm glad to have some semblance of a family again, no matter how it's cobbled together. It's the kind of stability I never had growing up. When I was in my twenties, I tried to do the family man thing, but I wasn't ready for it then. Now, I'm extremely thankful that I have the chance to try again—with the right woman.

  I look at Eva, really look at her. "Where would I be without you?"

  She blushes to the roots of her hair, and this Latina rarely blushes.

  "I mean it," I continue, gliding my thumb over her chin. "You're the only force strong enough to keep me from thinking about cocaine. I know it's something I'll be struggling with for the rest of my life, but every day when I'm faced with the choice between snorting a line or making you proud of me, I'll always choose to be the man you've helped me become. I'll always choose this life I have with you."

  "I hope so," she whispers.

  She accepts me for who I am, and she's willing to fight my addiction right along with me. I'll stay strong. I won't do what her birth mother did to her or what my mother did to me, no matter how hard it gets. I won't disappoint her. We both deserve better than that. I love her too much to ever let that happen.

  I play with a strand of her hair. "So, you're going to let Willa and Coco sit in your dad's seats?"

  "Yeah. He's going to stand with me up by the concession stands and help me keep an eye on them. He said he wants to check in with you too after the game since he wasn't able to meet with you this morning."

  "He's a busy guy. I don't know how he makes time for me as it is. I bet he's glad to have you back at Harbor House."

  "Yeah, but it's been strange not following you around everywhere you go. To the bathroom, to the—" She laughs when I touch her face, signaling her to stop.

  "I don't miss that," I tease her.

  "You don't miss me at all?" she asks, giving me an exaggerated pout.

  "Well…maybe a little," I whisper, pressing my lips to hers.

  I tug her bottom lip between my teeth, and she moans in response as I slide my tongue into her mouth to deepen the kiss.

  Oh, I've missed her, all right, and right now, I intend to show her just how much.

  Chapter Thirty-Seven

  Eva

  Step Eleven

  Knowledge of God's will and the power to carry it out.

  I glance over at Drake, who's wearing his baggy, past-the-knee, warm-up shorts and looking like a major jock in a room full of women and little girls.

  "Have you ever done yoga before?" I ask him.

  "What do you think?" he replies, stretching his massive arms across his chest like he's getting ready to enter the on-deck circle instead of the "Mommy and Me" class that's about to start.

  I stand on my tiptoes to give him a quick peck on the cheek. "I think it's really sweet that you signed up to do this with Willa and Coco."

  "I guess it's better than ballet," he says with a wry grin.

  "You're certainly making all of the mommies in here very happy," I giggle, hearing them titter behind us over the member of the New York Kings in their midst. "I bet they can't wait to see you bend over."

  He levels me with his blue-green eyes, and I immediately feel that delicious twinge in my belly. "Stop. I'm already self-conscious enough as it is."

  "Come on." I hold my hand out. "Let's go take our place on the floor by your two super excited girls over there. It looks like they have a pink mat all laid out for you."

  He rolls his eyes at me. "Great."

  But I know he wouldn't be doing this if he didn't want to. It's a major step forward, carving out some time in his schedule to do something special with the girls. Plus, it's a good chance for him to combine two worthwhile activities—creating some fun memories with Willa and Coco and learning how to clear his mind from all the distractions in his life.

  And boy, does he have distractions.

  The dealer and his cronies who attacked us behind Rosewood ratted on Mama. They agreed to testify against her in return for a lesser sentence. Since the case crosses state lines, the FBI got involved in the investigation and raided the family homestead last week. They took Mama out in handcuffs but didn't unearth as much evidence as they had expected to find. Someone must've tipped Mama off beforehand. The bulk of her inventory was gone before they could confiscate it, and the fire pit out front still contained scraps of the paper trail she was trying to burn. Now, the FBI is painstakingly trying to piece together what they found, but it could take months, or even years, before they'll be able to bring her to trial.

  And I worry about how that's going to affect Drake.

  He sits on the mat, which is too small for his legs, and gamely tries to give it a go even though he's clearly uncomfortable. "So, what are we going to be doing today?" he asks them.

  "We're going to stretch and bend and—" Coco starts, her pigtails bouncing from side to side.

  "No, more than that," Willa interrupts her little sister. "We're going to expand our minds!"

  "Is that right?" Drake asks, trying to hide his grin. "I don't think mine can get any bigger."

  "Oh, Daddy…" Willa sighs, rolling her tu
rquoise eyes just like he did a moment ago, making me want to laugh. "You're supposed to be taking this seriously," she scolds him. "Yoga isn't a game."

  "Willa, why don't you partner with me for the first half of the class?" I jump in, saving Drake from being on the receiving end of his daughter's lecture. "Then we can switch after the break."

  "Yay, Daddy! That means you get me!" Coco cries, throwing herself onto his lap.

  He lets out a grunt because Coco must've kneed him where she shouldn't have. Again, I bite down hard on the inside of my cheek to keep from laughing. These girls have more energy than he knows what to do with.

  "Hello, class. Are we ready to begin?" The instructor strides into the room, hitting the remote to turn on some mood music.

  I stand up, watching Drake's shoulders tense in front of me. He's nervous. A big guy like him doesn't exactly blend in with a room full of mothers and daughters. He's used to being on a baseball field, not a yoga studio in Soho. And based on how he's placing all of his weight on one leg, I think I have a good idea why.

  I place my hands on his back before we begin and whisper in his ear. "Is it your hip?"

  He nods, and I have to step away as the instructor begins guiding us through the first movement. Willa's arms are out of position, so I quickly adjust them for her, but my mind's still on Drake. If he's in any pain, he shouldn't be doing this. He has a game tonight.

  I keep my eye on him, and he seems fine up until we have to sit on our mats with the soles of our feet pressed together. He's facing me now, a grimace on his face. He folds his hands in front of him and dutifully begins to close his eyes along with everyone else, but not before giving me a wink.

  I stretch and bend, just like Coco said, twisting and contorting my body for a full thirty minutes before the instructor signals for everyone to take a quick break. The girls head for the water cooler in the back, along with the other children, and I have a moment to assess how he's doing.