‘Well, you won’t be able to at first, but you’ll begin to feel better. You will. It’ll take some getting used to, but if you remain with him, things might just get worse. Sure, it’ll hurt you, but time heals.’
‘Time hasn’t healed you,’ she sniffed as she wiped her nose. ‘You’re still just as sad as you were back then.’
Charlie smiled sadly. ‘Yes, I suppose I am. But there’s a difference between me and you. I lost your mother and I loved her to the very ends of the earth. Are you still in love with Greg?’
Swallowing, Magda thought hard. Was she still in love with him? She didn’t think she was, but even then, the thought of living life without him was painful, whether she loved him or not. Did she still want to spend time with him? She didn’t think so. He’d been sleeping with other women behind her back. How could she love him when he’d lied and hidden things from her? And she’d done the same right back to him, which hadn’t been the best thing to do. It had been a rash decision on her part, but she’d made it anyway out of sheer desperation.
‘No,’ Magda said simply. ‘No. I don’t think I do love him anymore.’ And there it was. As soon as she said the words, she knew in the deepest depths of her heart that they were true. It was over, and it had been for a long, long time. She just hadn’t wanted to believe it was true. It hurt too much to believe it. She’d pinned all her hopes and dreams on that man. Transferred them from Sophia to Greg when she shouldn’t have. She felt so incredibly foolish.
‘See?’ Charlie said softly. ‘Our situations are completely different.’ He rubbed her back, then tucked a strand of hair behind her ear, just like he’d done when she’d been a little girl. ‘You can make things better. You’re not stuck. You just have to be brave and I know you can be that.’
As if he knew she needed some time alone to think, Charlie left the kitchen quietly. Magda stared down at her tear-splashed breakfast and took a deep breath. He was right. He was always right. She didn’t want to feel this way. Like a victim of her own life. She wanted to be back in control, happy with the decisions she’d made and with where she was.
She knew that a massive part of her sadness lay here, in Worthington Green, in the place that had made her. More specifically, in Sophia. Perhaps it was karma, that she’d been hurt after hurting Sophia. She missed her old friend more than anything, but knew it wouldn’t be easy to get her alone and talk to her properly, one on one. But that was the only way anything could be discussed between them. She knew she should have done it a long, long time ago, but like she’d said to Charlie, it had been difficult to do anything that involved home.
And what about Tom? What would happen between him and Sophia? So many apologies needed to be made, so many bridges built. One thing was for sure though; before Magda returned home, things here would be mended, no matter how hard it turned out to be. And then, when she and Greg were reunited, she’d finally tell him the truth. That she knew all about what he’d been doing behind her back, and that she’d been doing things behind his back too, and that she was no longer going to stand for any of it. It was all or nothing. She’d be going for the divorce despite its being something she’d never imagined for herself. But if it meant she could be happy again, then she didn’t care. She couldn’t be with him any more. She didn’t love him, and wasn’t that what she wanted above all else? Love. True love. The kind of love that lasts for ever. The kind of love that had Charlie still missing her mother every single day.
*
‘Won’t be long.’
‘Where are you off to? Anywhere exciting?’
Magda paused before leaving the house and looked back at Charlie. ‘I’m just going into the high street. The fridge and cupboards are looking a little bare so I thought I’d go and grab some shopping for you. You don’t mind, do you?’
‘Course not. Knock yourself out.’ He disappeared back into the lounge.
Magda laughed. ‘See you in a bit.’ She needed some fresh air anyway. It was only a short drive to the supermarket. Once there, Magda popped a coin into the trolley and headed through the automatic doors. It felt good to be out and about, helping Charlie, even if in the smallest of ways. Her first stop was the fruit and veg aisle. Not the most exciting, but she grabbed a few bits and pieces that Charlie could use in one the stews he loved so much. She continued around the supermarket, chucking this and that into the trolley, until she turned into the tinned goods aisle and spotted the familiar face up ahead, scanning the shelves for whatever it was she needed.
Magda halted and felt someone else’s trolley hit into the back of her. ‘I’m so sorry,’ she blurted out to the disgruntled woman who shook her head and tutted at Magda before stalking away. Magda swallowed and tried to get her bearings. What should she do? Continue down the aisle? Try to speak to Sophia? Or just run away and hope they didn’t bump into each other again? She felt like an idiot standing there, unsure of where to go. She blinked at Sophia who luckily still hadn’t noticed her, and decided she would simply carry on as normal.
She paused at the top of the aisle and pretended to study the variety of soups that were on offer. While she did this, she continued to risk glances at Sophia, who was only a short distance away. She could feel herself getting hotter and hotter. Part of her wanted to stride right up to Sophia, while the other half didn’t want to make a scene here in the supermarket. Maybe if she just waited it out, then it would all blow over. Sophia would go to the next aisle leaving Magda to hang back to avoid collisions in future aisles. She turned back to the soups and dropped a couple of tins of tomato into the trolley. To her relief, the next time she looked in Sophia’s direction, the young woman was halfway out of the aisle, and turning into the next one. Once she had gone, Magda perused the shelves properly, free from threat.
Once she hit the biscuit aisle, and saw no sign of Sophia, Magda continued shopping as normal. She even began to enjoy herself, she was so relaxed. Realising she’d forgotten some tins of tuna for sandwiches, she turned back on herself to head back to the right aisle, and to her horror banged straight into a stricken Sophia.
Magda gasped and found herself frozen to the spot. She licked her lips and stared back at Sophia whose gaze didn’t falter. The women didn’t say a single word to each other. Magda was wondering just how long they’d been standing there when Sophia closed her gaping mouth, pursed her lips, and turned to hurry away. Magda went to call her back, to at least say something that would help the situation, but she couldn’t think of anything. She was speechless and felt unable to do anything right then. Instead, once she’d recovered, she finished off the shopping, took the bags back to the car, and drove home.
Chapter Sixteen
The night of Sophia’s date with Simon had finally arrived. She was riddled with nerves, and having bumped into Magda in the supermarket the previous night, they’d only intensified tenfold. She hadn’t known where to put her face when she had realised Magda was the owner of the trolley in front of her. The shock had sent her reeling and she hadn’t known what to do other than run to the checkouts and get out of there as quickly as possible.
She couldn’t stop thinking about the evening ahead. Heading out with Michael was completely different because she knew him inside out, but she knew hardly anything about Simon. They’d be starting from the very beginning and she’d never been great at making conversation with strangers. Still, she supposed their texts had made her feel comfortable and he seemed nice enough. Only time would tell.
Esther had gone to stay with her grandmother for the night. She’d been so excited when her grandad had picked her up earlier that afternoon. She’d jumped into his arms and thrown hers around his neck before rushing off to the car, which she had clambered into and waited.
‘How’re you, darling?’ Joseph had given his only daughter a quick squeeze and smiled warmly. ‘Looking forward to tonight? Your mother has told me all about it. She’s thrilled.’
‘I’m nervous. But kind of excited, I suppose. I
t’s been a long time since I’ve gone on a date. We’ve been texting and he seems lovely, so I’m hoping tonight goes well. Who knows?’
‘You’ll be grand, I know you will,’ Joseph assured her. ‘It’s about time someone took our girl out and treated her like the princess she is.’
‘Aurwh, thanks Dad.’ Sophia smiled at his words. ‘How’re you? How’s Mum? Both doing okay in that big ole’ house of yours?’ She gave him a nudge with her shoulder. They were stood side by side on the doorstep where they were able to keep an eye on Esther, who was waving at her Grandpa to hurry up. He waved back and mouthed the words five more minutes, holding up four fingers and a thumb.
‘We’re both doing great. It’s so peaceful up there. Very different to this place, but I think it’s what we both needed. A change of scenery can do a person the world of good. In my opinion anyway. How’s Michael? Him and the little one doing all right?’
‘They’re both fine. Doing better than ever actually. Michael’s looking to start dating again too, so it seems we’re both on the lookout for love.’ She chuckled. ‘He’s doing the online dating thing. He’s been chatting to a few women on there but I don’t know if anything’s come of it yet. We’ll see.’
‘Ah, it’ll do him good to have a woman in his life again. Harry too. I’m glad they’re doing okay though, poor man, after everything that ex of his did to him. I’m surprised he even wants to try again considering all that. Still, if he feels it’s time to get back out there, then it must be.’
Sophia nodded. ‘I agree. Fingers crossed something good happens for him. It might just be the cherry on his cake.’
‘Do you know something? I always imagined it would be you and Michael getting together. I don’t know why. Just an idea I had, I suppose. You seem so right for each other. Mum thinks the same, but you know how much she adores him anyway.’ Joseph winked. Sophia tried to keep her expression free of emotion, but inside her heart was skipping a crazy beat. Did they really think so? ‘Right. I better get this little madam to your mum. She’s waiting in the kitchen. Mentioned making fairy cakes or something. God knows.’
‘Okay then. Good to see you, Dad. Give my love to Mum, will you? Tell her I’ll come and see her soon.’
‘Course I will.’ Joseph pecked her on the cheek. He turned away but turned back again. ‘And listen. Enjoy yourself tonight, all right? No fretting. No panicking. Just have fun. You deserve it.’
Sophia waved to Esther and watched as her dad climbed into the car. Her father and daughter trundled down the street and then disappeared around the corner.
‘Hi. Sophia, isn’t it?’
Sophia couldn’t help but be impressed. Simon was nothing like she’d imagined him to be. She had no idea why but, in her mind, she’d somehow conjured up a different image entirely. The man standing before her was pleasingly attractive. He had sandy hair and light blue eyes and was a good foot taller than her, which was something she’d always liked in the opposite sex.
They’d met outside The Peacock in Banbury, the next town over from Worthington Green. She’d booked herself a taxi, knowing that, once she got there, she’d need a drink or two to calm her nerves. It was a nice area, tidy and well maintained, and the pub looked welcoming too, with an orange glow coming from behind the windows beckoning her inside into the warmth. When the taxi dropped her off, she’d spotted the man waiting outside the doors and wondered if it was Simon. It turned out that it was.
‘Hi, yes. And you’re Simon?’
‘That’s right,’ he smiled. He had a lovely set of teeth. Not perfect, but who needed perfect anyway? ‘Was the drive okay? Did it take you long to get here? You live over in Worthington Green, if I remember correctly.’
‘Yes, that’s right. The drive was pretty quick so it wasn’t too bad at all.’ She rubbed her hands together. ‘Shall we head inside? It’s a bit nippy out here, isn’t it?’
‘Yes, yes, of course. Sorry. Here I am, standing here like a big lump. Let’s get into the warmth, eh?’ Simon held the door open for her and followed her inside. Light laughter and chatter filled the air and Sophia liked what she saw. It wasn’t too boisterous, but there was still an atmosphere, which she began to soak up immediately. ‘Have you been here before?’ she asked, gazing up at the thick wooden beams. They looked authentic, adding a charm to the place.
‘A few times,’ Simon replied. ‘Let’s grab a table and then I’ll get us some drinks from the bar. Come on. Let’s see if my favourite table is free. Fingers crossed.’
Simon placed his hand against Sophia’s lower back and gently steered her around the bar and towards a corner of the pub.
‘Result!’ Simon grinned and nodded at the table, which was situated a nice distance from the fire that was crackling away. ‘Here, let me get your seat for you.’ Sophia couldn’t help but smile as Simon first took her coat, and then pulled out her chair, nodding for her to take a seat.
‘Thank you.’ Sophia sat down and relished the feel of the heat of the fire coming from her left side. Not hot enough to become uncomfortable, but warm enough for her to feel it.
‘Before we decide on food,’ he began, still standing, ‘I’ll nip to the bar. What would you like?’
‘A glass of white wine would be lovely, thank you.’
‘I’ll be right back.’
Sophia took a sneaky glance at Simon’s backside as he walked away from the table. She couldn’t help it. Everything she’d heard and seen so far was a wonderful surprise and she wondered why she’d been so nervous. He was dressed in just the right way too. Nothing too formal. Just dark jeans and a black shirt rolled up at the forearms, but he looked nice, and she could tell he’d made an effort. He smelt sensational too. She looked into the flames of the fire and wondered what Michael was up to.
The evening passed by in a blur of laughter. Sophia didn’t think she’d ever laughed so much as she had sitting there at the table with him. He was such an easy-going person and wasn’t afraid of making a fool of himself, which only tickled Sophia’s sides more. He had something, that was for sure. Something Sophia found she quite liked and would love to see more of. Before she knew it, it was nearing midnight and the barman was calling last orders.
‘God, is that the time already?’ Simon looked at his watch. ‘It is. It’s midnight. How the hell did that happen?’
‘Time flies when you’re having fun.’ Sophia swallowed the last of her fourth glass of wine. Her cheeks were warming up and she knew that, once she stood, she’d feel a little wobbly.
‘Come on,’ Simon said, holding her coat out for her to step into. ‘Let’s get going.’
Outside, Sophia turned to him. ‘Thank you so much for tonight, Simon. I’ve enjoyed myself. I really have.’
‘Good, I’m glad. It was a real pleasure to meet you in person. If you’re up for it, I’d love to do this again. You don’t have to decide right now, of course, but you’ve got my number. I’ll probably end up texting you first. I can’t tell you how much fun I’ve had.’
His hand curved around her cheek and Sophia took a breath before his lips met hers. The kiss deepened and she felt herself relax into it, pleasure unravelling slowly in her chest. She kept her eyes closed with her face tilted up to his. He smelt so good, he was tall and handsome, he was… not Michael. Sophia fell back down to earth with a bump and, as she stepped back, quickly pulled herself together. What was wrong with her? What on earth was Michael doing in her thoughts while kissing this other man?
‘Oh, that’s my taxi!’ The vehicle pulled up and wound down the window. When the driver called out Sophia’s name, she nodded towards him before quickly turning back to Simon. ‘I’m definitely up for doing this again,’ she lied, her cheeks burning.
‘Goodbye,’ he called, as she climbed into the taxi.
If only Cath had told Sophia what Simon was really like, perhaps she wouldn’t have been so nervous in the first place. Despite the arrival of Michael in her thoughts, the
date had been promising and she hoped it wouldn’t be too long until she saw Simon again. Perhaps after a couple more dates with him, her mind would catch up with her body.
She got her phone out of her bag and typed out a quick text.
‘Date was amazing. Will tell you all about it soon. Soph x’
She sent it to Michael and wondered how he’d feel as he read it. She put the phone away and sat back in the seat, unable to shake the tiny niggles of doubt.
Chapter Seventeen
Magda was on a mission, and despite it being early, she felt wide awake and raring to go. Her destination was Sophia’s parents’ house. She hadn’t been there for years but still remembered the place as if she’d visited only yesterday. She needed a bit of background information on her ex-best friend and there was no better place to go to find it.
It wasn’t windy today, and the sky above was clear, but there remained a small chill in the air, coming in from off the sea. It felt as if the weather never changed in Worthington Green.
She zipped up her jacket and walked briskly towards the street where Sophia had grown up. She spotted it as soon as she turned the corner and her mind immediately became flooded with memories of their teenage years that summoned up a happy smile. Sneaking bottles of cider. Plastering each other in make-up. Singing and dancing along to their favourite tunes as the music thumped against the walls of Sophia’s small bedroom. Those had been the days all right. If Magda imagined hard enough, she could almost see their teenage frames through the front upstairs window, wriggling away as they prepared for another night out with the rest of their mates, getting up to typical teenage antics they’d dissect to within an inch of their life the next day.
She didn’t feel afraid as she approached the front door. She had no reason to. She felt a tiny bit nervous though. Sophia and her parents had always been Magda’s safe place when she’d been younger. No matter what, there had always been a spare space at the dining table and a spare pillow and duvet available to her if she ever needed it. They were genuine, warm and good-hearted people, and Magda had always adored them for their generosity and kindness. Sophia had inherited all those traits too, which made her a better person than Magda would ever be.
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