Against The Wall

by Dee J. Adams

  Jess knew so little about him and the more time she spent with him, the more questions she had. Especially now that they’d been so intimate. The way he treated her today alone spoke volumes about the man.

  “What’s your favorite color?” she asked.

  His hand stilled on her hip. “That’s your first question after mind-blowing sex?” He chuckled and shrugged. “I don’t know. I don’t have a favorite color.”

  “No way,” she said, tilting her head to look up at him. “Everybody has a favorite color. There has to be something you like. A color that reminds you of something fun or a good memory,” she prompted.

  “If I had one, I don’t remember. I haven’t been around too much color the last seven years. Just a lot of gray.”

  “You’ve been out for a few weeks, right? What colors have you seen that you like?”

  Tanner shifted and ran his palm through her hair. His dark gaze raked over her face. “Red,” he said. “I like the red streaks in your hair. That’s my favorite.” His voice was low, sexy. He followed up with a long soft kiss. When he pulled away, Jess was breathing hard. “If you don’t stop talking, in the next few minutes we won’t be doing any talking, if you get my drift. You should go to sleep.”

  She understood his meaning. If she wasn’t asleep in the next few minutes he’d be ready for another round of sex. Quite honestly, she was tired, and more than a little sore. But a few minutes gave her time for one last inconsequential question.

  “When’s your birthday?”

  He huffed a quick sigh. “November thirtieth.”

  Eric’s birthday was the twenty-ninth. Tanner was a Sagittarius, just like her brother. They had the same qualities. Strong, protective, loyal and independent. Not to mention macho. Jess listened to the steady beat of Tanner’s heart and went down the list of qualities that made Tanner a standout. He had a sense of fairness, of honor. Not to mention the gentleness under his rough exterior. Her list f are you doing?.t him aded as she fell into oblivion.

  ____________

  When Jess opened her eyes, darkness still penetrated the room. She didn’t look at the clock, didn’t want to know the time. Her head rested on Tanner’s chest and his arm draped possessively around her shoulder.

  Sleep softened the hard lines of his face, made him almost look his age, but not quite. He was hard bodied, hard minded, but in sleep she saw a different man. Maybe it was the man he’d been before prison.

  What had happened to her? Jess St. John didn’t sleep around. She didnarly killed hi

  Chapter Seventeen

  Tanner slowly came awake. Everywhere but his cock. His cock was already wide-awake and erect, anticipating the mouth moving south. The erotic dream he’d been having had been way better than his usual fight-or-flight dreams and now it was reality. He didn’t open his eyes, didn’t move. He let the sensation of Jess’s lips ripple through him. Let her warm breath wash over his abs as she methodically inched down his body.

  Damn. She was amazing. He ran his fingers through the softness of her hair and encouraged her to keep going, to take him to heaven. Still, he didn’t open his eyes, he just experienced her as she touched him, kissed him, her soft lips, sucking, taking little nips of his skin.

  Goddamn. So good.

  When she circled his navel with her tongue, his stomach contracted, he sucked in air. The lower she went, the faster his heart pounded, the more his cock stiffened. She was going to blow him away. Literally, he hoped.

  Her warm hands slid down his groin on either side of his cock and pressed his thighs apart as she eased between his legs. He hadn’t been this vulnerable in years. Hadn’t felt so much anticipation ever. The way Jess had gone about this so far had every cell alive and screaming for more. She hadn’t even touched his cock and he was happier than he’d been in years.

  Tanner finally opened his eyes. Saw her contemplating his erection. He couldn’t help but smile, couldn’t keep the spark of elation from shooting through his body. When she smoothed her thumb up the length of him, he stiffened and immediately lost the smile.

  She was going to kill him. This wasn’t going to be quick. It was going to be torture.

  Taking her time, she smoothed the drop of pre-cum around his cock head and he groaned. She took him fully into her hand, or tried to anyway. A little sound, almost like a hum, vibrated in her throat and he wanted her to make that same noise while he was in her mouth. Wanted to know what it felt like.

  Her tongue snaked out and tasted the tip and Tanner about came off the bed. He wanted to hold her head steady and guide her stripped off his T-shirt’to his m over him, but he didn’t. Her tentativeness gave him a clue, so did the way she explored him. She might have been on the other side of twenty-five, but that didn’t make her sexually experienced. She hadn’t been a virgin, but she was no slut either and the longer she took to take him into her mouth, the more he wanted to be there.

  “Jess.” The word was strangled. A plea if he’d ever made one. “Go ahead. Please sweetheart. Take it.” God, he was already panting like a fucking dog. Waiting, wanting.

  She met his gaze with glittering eyes, and a silent promise, before covering the tip with her lips. Every muscle in Tanner’s body went rigid. He lifted his arms over his head, dug his hands under the pillow to keep from holding her steady and driving deep into her mouth. She was in dangerous territory and didn’t realize it. But Tanner did. He struggled with himself, struggled to let her go at her own pace no matter how much it killed him.

  Her tongue circled and swiped at the top before she took him deeper in her mouth.

  Ah, God. “That’s it.” He moved his hips, forced her to take a little more. “So good, Jess. It’s so damn good.”

  She made that sound in her throat and it vibrated through his cock and straight up his spine. Fuck. Sensation swirled up his center, coiled his body tighter. When she pulled off, he silently swore for pushing her too far.

  Moonlight shone down from the high window over the bed and lit her face. “Tell me if I do something wrong,” she said. “I’m probably not very good at this.” Then she licked him from base to tip and the wet heat of her tongue made his eyes roll back in his head. Jesus, was she wrong about that. She adjusted over him for a better angle and wrapped her hand around his shaft before going down again.

  Holy fucking God.

  He’d become some sort of science project, a guinea pig for her use and she used him so well. Minute by minute, she worked him over, alternating with her tongue and going deep, taking him until he felt the back of her throat. Just when she hit a rhythm one way, she changed to something else, driving him crazy with inconsistency and hurtling him to the finish.

  Second by second she brought him closer to heaven and he held on by a thread, loving her mouth on him, her hands on him, the way she moaned and licked him. A firestorm of heat built at the base of his cock, in his balls. She was five seconds from pushing him over the edge.

  “Jess…” God, he could barely speak. “I’m not going to last.” He felt obligated to warn her. She hadn’t struck him as a girl who went this far, but she didn’t stop. “I’m serious. I won’t be able to…” Ah, God, he couldn’t hold back. “This is it,” he rasped as she took him all the way. Instead of pulling off, she grabbed his hips and held on, gripped him with nails digging into his skin and her mouth covering his cock.

  Watching her sent him over as much as her actions did and Tanner gave into the release. He pumped his hips as his come jetted into her mouth, down her throat. She took everything. Pleasure roared through him, bursting from the middle and rippling to the edges in unparalleled every cell alive and scream“atay b waves. Gritting his teeth, he forced his hips still and concentrated on complete satisfaction. On the way her hands stroked his skin after his orgasm crested. On the tight sheath of her mouth.

  The moment when she slowly and carefully pulled off and looked at him branded in his brain. A glimmer of pride lurked in her sparkling eye
s. The tiniest of smiles curved her swollen lips. She was the sexiest woman he’d ever known. When she glanced away, Tanner saw the sudden blush creep into her cheeks and he refused to lose the bold woman who’d taken control. He pulled her up and rolled her beneath him, taking her mouth in a warm kiss. He tasted his tangy essence on her lips, drove his tongue deeply into her mouth. He could kiss her all night. All day. Her soft lips conformed to his, her warm breath mingled with his. Her hands stroked along his nape and kept him close.

  She made him feel valuable. Not because of the great sex, but along with it. Like he might actually be worth something and when was the last time he’d ever felt that?

  “That was the best wake-up call I’ve ever had,” he whispered, brushing his mouth across hers. She was one hundred percent pure sweet, hot woman and she needed to know it. “That was amazing.” He kissed her again. “Outrageous.” He held her face in his hands and stared into her bright eyes. “Thank you for that.”

  She smiled shyly. “You’re welcome.”

  He slid his hand down her side, across her stomach and down to the soft patch of curls between her legs. She was slick, more than ready for him. In another five minutes he’d be able to go again, but he didn’t want her to wait. Her eyes widened when he slipped two fingers inside. “Look how wet you are,” he murmured, watching her. Her gaze skittered away and Tanner didn’t have to see her blush to know she had. “Look in my eyes, Jess.” Moving slowly, he stroked his fingers inside her. When her gaze locked onto his, he circled her clit with his thumb and pressed down. Tanner took her gasp into his mouth. He’d wanted to watch her, to see her eyes when she came, but also wanted to be in her everywhere at the same time, his tongue in her mouth, his fingers in her body. Her hips moved in time with his thrusts and Tanner kissed her deeper, harder. Her cream covered his fingers, slicked up his palm as he teased her. When he finally hit the spot she needed, it only took another minute before she came hard, clenching around his fingers with spasms that rocked her the same way his had rocked him.

  Breathing hard, she stared up at him with sated eyes, stroking her thumb across his cheekbone. It was a look he’d never forget. “You’re pretty good at that,” she whispered.

  “Yeah, go figure. I’m pretty damn rusty too. Imagine the possibilities with a little practice.” He meant it as a joke, but her smile faded. So did the glow in her eyes. Yeah, he shouldn’t have brought up the possibilities because clearly she wasn’t thinking along those lines. Whatever her life had in store, it didn’t involve him. At least not in the long run. Not that he wanted any type of long run, but he wouldn’t have minded a few months of having her all to himself. She had too much going to think about the next time she’d be having sex with him. But he got that.

  It didn’t change the fact that he wanted her. A lot. He could spend the next month in her bed and not think about any,” she whispered“Doatay bthing else. That was probably normal for a guy who’d been celibate as long as he had. He’d managed to deal with it, but now that the drought was over, he couldn’t imagine going without.

  Tanner shifted Jess onto her side and brought her up close against his chest, spooning her body and keeping his palm on that sweet, wet heat between her legs. He smoothed his lips across the soft skin of her shoulder, gently kissing and nipping, content to touch her because he suspected she wouldn’t give him the opportunity once this night ended.

  She was in a state of flux. He understood it since the same could be said about him. He didn’t know where he was going or where he’d end up. One thing he did know… Jess was a damn fine detour. He couldn’t stop touching her, didn’t want to. That was normal. Right? Because he hadn’t been with a woman in so long, it was natural that he couldn’t keep his hands off her…or his mind from thinking about her. This was only temporary. Didn’t matter that it felt great having her in his arms. Didn’t matter that their time was limited. He’d lived in the “now” for a lot of years. He’d had to stay focused on each day, each minute and he wouldn’t change because his circumstances had.

  But damn if he wasn’t going to enjoy Jess for as long as he could. She was incredible softness and tinsel strength all meshed up in one small package. She was shy and bold, innocent and wicked. She was a contradiction in every term.

  “Where are you from?” she asked softly.

  The question came from out of nowhere. But maybe she was feeling a little self-conscious, a little uneasy. Maybe she just needed some reassurance that he wasn’t from Mars.

  “I grew up in a little town south of Denver.” Lush green country he missed more than he wanted to admit.

  “Are you going back there when you leave here?”

  Shit. Apparently answering one question meant that an avalanche of more followed. He could cut her off, but that would probably send her out of his arms and he didn’t want to lose this time with her.

  It seemed inevitable that he would leave here, but he hadn’t figured out where to go. “No. I don’t know.” He was lying because he knew damn well he wouldn’t—couldn’t—go home. Not after what he’d put his family through. “I doubt it.”

  Jess turned in his arms. Her face gleamed in the moonlight, silky smooth. “How come?”

  She had no idea she was swimming into rough waters, landing on a topic he didn’t want to discuss. For years he’d put his family in the back of his mind. Doing his best to forget they existed, only to have their memories rise up and bite him in the ass when he least expected it.

  Jess squeezed his arm. “Tanner…tell me. How come you won’t go home?”

  Tanner probably owed her some answers, if only to say thank you for the incredible sex. “I hurt my family when I landed in prison. I don’t want to hurt them anymore. They don’t need me showing up now after all this time.” every cell alive and scream“atay b

  “What makes you think that?” Her eyebrows quirked up in question.

  “Davis is a small town. A lot of gossip. I embarrassed my parents when I got convicted. My mom doesn’t need me coming back now and starting up all the gossips again. I wouldn’t do that to her or my sisters.”

  “What about your father? You haven’t mentioned him. How does he feel?” The girl was a pit bull when it came to wanting information.

  He remembered his dad going through his first bout of cancer, telling him how Tanner would be the man of the house, how he’d have to take care of his mother and sisters if he died. His dad had survived that go-round, but not the next. Instead of graduating college with a degree, Tanner had gotten himself arrested and thrown in jail, so that when his father had died, he hadn’t been any good to his mother and sisters. He’d been stuck in the pen.

  “He died while I was in prison.”

  Jess lifted up on her elbow and stared down at him. “Oh, Tanner. I’m sorry.” Her face had a look of horror mixed with concern. “That must have been so hard.”

  The hardest news he’d ever heard. Worse than the judge’s sentencing at his trial.

  “But that’s even more of a reason to go home. Your family needs you.”

  Tanner shook his head. “They don’t need me. They’ve been living without me for this long, they don’t need me.”

  “That’s ridiculous. Of course they need—”

  “Jess!” She flinched, but didn’t move away from him. Damn, he hadn’t meant to do that. “Look,” he said, after taking a deep breath. “I haven’t had contact with them since I went in, okay? They don’t want me around, I can guarantee it.”

  Her eyes narrowed. “No contact?” She shook her head. “Didn’t they write to you? Or visit you?” She didn’t give him a chance to answer as she sat up. “How could they do that to you? I can’t believe they’d just—”

  “Slow down.” Tanner pulled her back down next to him where he had her soft skin at his fingertips. “They didn’t do anything. In the beginning they tried to visit, but I wouldn’t see them. I didn’t open their letters either.”

  “Why? Why would
you do that?” she asked softly, searching his eyes.

  Did it matter if he told her? He’d kept his feelings buried so deep for so long he wasn’t sure he could even talk about this. “I was ashamed, all right. Embarrassed. No one in the family tree had ever been arrested, much less be convicted of a felony and do time. I couldn’t face them. I didn’t deserve them. I blew it.”

  “Oh, Tanner. I’m sorry. But you didn’t blow it. You got railroaded. You can’t ignore your family because of something that happened to you. Because of something you had no control over.,” she whispered aroundatay b”

  Tanner forced a smile. “I blew it by hanging with the wrong crowd. Alex Juneau was not your average college student.” Instead of living on ramen noodles and peanut butter like the rest of their buddies, Alex ate steak and drove a convertible. Thinking about Alex only brought up the anger and resentment, and those two emotions had kicked Tanner’s ass enough already.

  He eased Jess beneath him and trailed his lips to her ear. “I don’t want to talk about it anymore.”

  “But—”

  He silenced her with a kiss. “Shh.” Then he made her forget about everything but him.

  ____________

  Jess woke with a start, her eyes opened wide as her heart thundered in her chest.

  A dream. She’d been having a dream. More like a nightmare. She’d seen her family bloody and bruised and she’d been running, trying to get to them, but no matter how hard she’d tried, her legs had felt like bricks. No matter how close she’d gotten, they’d stayed out of her range. Blake had been calling her names from their childhood. Screaming at her. Teasing her.

  She took a steadying breath, became of aware of Tanner holding her closely, their bodies skin to skin, her back to his front. She’d never met a guy who touched as much as he did. Her past boyfriends had been happy to sleep in their own zip code after sex, whether it be on the other side of bed or literally a different zip code.