The Theory of Unrequited

by Len Webster

  “I mean that,” he said.

  “Well, I do have something I want to ask you.”

  Unsure AJ returned.

  She was confident in so many aspects of life, but not right now.

  When it came to her self-worth, that was where she had the least confidence.

  “Ask me,” he encouraged.

  AJ reached up and pressed her fingertips to her necklace as if it gave her strength to ask. She took a deep breath and released it with a smile. “Evan, would you like to come to a New Year’s party with me at my dad’s work? It’s pretty important to him, apparently, and I can’t stomach the idea of being the only person under twenty-one going.”

  Evan let out a laugh, relieved it wasn’t something terrible she wanted to know or do. Standing up, he held out his hand, and AJ reached up and set her hand in his. Evan pulled her up from the sand and instantly cupped her jaw.

  It was intimate.

  Too intimate for best friends.

  But he didn’t care.

  Some lines had grown hazy long before he realized just how much Alexandra mattered to him. In some way, he always knew that it would happen with her.

  “You want me to go with you to your father’s New Year’s party?”

  “It’s okay if you don’t want to. I don’t want to either, but Mum is making me.”

  Snow softly landed on her brown hair, and Evan laughed at the way she shook her head, trying to get rid of them. “AJ, stop moving for a second.”

  She stilled and let out a sigh. “You don’t have to come.”

  “What if I want to?”

  “It’s going to be boring.”

  He rolled his eyes. “Are you trying to talk yourself out of company on New Year’s Eve?”

  “No, but I don’t want you to feel obligated.”

  Evan squinted at her. “I’m your best friend.”

  “Which means you can be honest with me.”

  He nodded, agreeing with her. “I promised Kyle I’d go to this stupid Red Sox family dinner thing.”

  “Oh, yeah, he told me about that.”

  “But—”

  AJ shook her head, pulling away from his hold. “No, you can’t bail on Kyle and the Red Sox. That’s important.”

  “You’re more important,” he found himself saying without a thought.

  “Can you go to both?”

  Evan closed the small distance between them, wrapping an arm around her lower back and pulling her body to his. “I can go to both,” he promised, pressing a kiss to AJ’s forehead.

  His best friend’s small hands found his hips as he moved his lips from her skin and cupped the back of her head to rest it against his chest. Evan peeked down when AJ tilted her chin back to look at him, seeing a glimpse of the silver necklace he had gotten her for Christmas.

  Oxygen.

  Number eight on the periodic table of elements.

  Alexandra rested her ear back against his chest, and Evan found himself whispering, “Eight protons. Eight neutrons,” wondering if she knew just how important the eighth element was to him.

  “And how is your senior year going?” Mr. Jacobson, one of the finance executives at the Red Sox, asked as Evan took the glass of sparkling water from the waiter.

  The New Year’s Eve dinner Evan was attending at Fenway Park had been a tradition the players, coaches, and executives had each year. It was a new tradition implemented to give a more family-friendly legacy for the team. Most of the players who had families attended. Those who didn’t attend were players recruited from out of state who wanted to ring in the New Year with their families or the players who had social obligations at certain events. The manager hadn’t made it a mandatory event but encouraged it since they had won the World Series last season and wanted to show the strength in team unity to the media and Red Sox fans.

  Evan mingled with everyone his brother made him approach. They had lied and said that their parents would have come if they weren’t so busy and out of town. Evan knew that Kyle hadn’t bothered to invite them. The only reason Evan was invited was so the media and Red Sox fans knew that he was Kyle’s younger brother.

  “It’s going well, Mr. Jacobson.”

  “And you’re the captain of your high school baseball team?”

  Evan nodded. “I am.”

  “Your brother must be so proud. Will another Gilmore be playing for the Red Sox?”

  “We’ll see,” Evan said to appease the executive and make Kyle happy. Soon, Evan would be leaving to meet AJ at her father’s work party. She had texted him to tell him not to rush and that it was as boring as she had expected.

  “Well, we’re all about family here at the Red Sox. You let us know if you decide to make ‘we’ll see’ into ‘it will.’ It was good to see you, Evan.”

  “You, too,” Evan replied as he watched Mr. Jacobson straighten his Red Sox pin on his lapel and then head off to mingle with the others. Evan knew that being the brother of the Red Sox captain meant he couldn’t fade into the background as he had hoped.

  His phone vibrated in his pants pocket, and Evan retrieved it to see that there was still four hours until the New Year. He still had time to make it to Mr. Parker’s office to celebrate New Year’s with the Parkers.

  His smile was instantaneous the moment he saw AJ’s name on his screen. He set down his sparkling water on the table next to him and unlocked his phone to read her text.

  AJ: How’s the Red Sox New Year’s Eve dinner going?

  Evan: Everyone wanted to know where Little Miss Red Sox was.

  AJ: Did you remind them I’m not family?

  Evan: I did. They all said you’re honorary family and that you should be here.

  AJ: Well, my REAL family comes before the Red Sox. Tell everyone I send my love. And when will you be coming to rescue me?

  Evan: Soon. I still have to pretend that my brother and I have a bond that no one can break, which we all know is a total lie. I don’t know how much longer this’ll go on, but I will try to make it as soon as I can.

  AJ: If you can’t, don’t stress about it. Plus, I don’t think you’ll be able to find a cab after nine. The city is already packed!

  Evan: Don’t worry, AJ. I’ll get to you before midnight.

  AJ: Okay. But be safe out there, all right?

  His chest warmed at her concern.

  Evan: I promise I will be.

  “Hey,” Kyle said, causing Evan to lock his phone and give his brother a tight smile.

  “Hey,” he replied as he picked up his glass from the table and swallowed back some of the sparkling water. “How were the manager and his family?”

  “Good. So listen, thanks for showing up.”

  Evan could see the discomfort consume his brother’s face, no doubt hating the fact that Evan was doing Kyle a favor.

  “Well, we are brothers, and this is a family event. Since our parents have their own lives, I couldn’t do that to you.”

  “Thanks, Evan.” Kyle sounded as if he meant it, and Evan hoped that maybe they might have a normal brother relationship in the future.

  The traffic was atrocious.

  AJ was right. Evan hadn’t been able to find a free cab after he left his brother at Fenway Park. There was so much congestion that Evan had no other choice but to go on foot to G&MC. It was at least twenty blocks away, but with how many people were on the streets celebrating, he knew it would take longer than he would have liked to make it to AJ. He had spent more time appeasing his brother and let time get away from him. He had left Fenway at eleven twenty, hoping it was enough time for him to make it to AJ before the New Year reached them.

  Finally, after what felt like he’d ran a marathon, Evan made it to Mr. Parker’s place of employment. He entered G&MC and was greeted by a woman by the desk in a red dress. She was holding a clipboar
d. He’d seen her a few times when he had to pick up AJ, and she’d call Mr. Parker to let him know that Evan was waiting in the lobby for his daughter.

  “Hey, Evan,” Lana greeted with a big smile. “Happy New Year.”

  “Thanks, Lana,” he said between heavy pants.

  “Couldn’t get a cab?”

  Evan shook his head. “No,” he confirmed. Evan unbuttoned his winter coat, reached into his jacket, and pulled out the invitation AJ had given him yesterday. Her whole family would be at the party, so he was glad that she hadn’t been alone while he was rushing to make it to G&MC in time.

  Lana took the invitation, opened it, and glanced at her clipboard. Then she handed him back the card. “Top floor, Evan.”

  “Thanks,” he said before he spun around and made his way toward the elevators.

  When it opened, and he stepped inside, Lana yelled out, “You look great, by the way.”

  “Thanks, Lana.” He smiled his appreciation and pressed the top floor button. As the elevator closed and ascended toward the party, he pulled his phone out of his pocket to find he had no signal to tell AJ he was on his way up. He returned his phone to his pocket and watched the numbers increase.

  When it reached the top floor, the steel doors opened, and Evan stepped out to loud music. The top floor was the executive offices at G&MC. It also had many conference rooms used for meetings with important clients. Mr. Parker had once taken him on a tour when Evan was thirteen. Turning left, he made his way down the hall. When he reached the open plan office space, he took in all the balloons and streamers. So many people were wearing Happy New Year glasses and party hats.

  It was so hot that Evan worked on getting his coat off when a server approached him. “I’ll be happy to take that, sir.”

  Evan handed him his jacket with a thankful smile. “Thanks.”

  “Happy New Year,” he said.

  “Happy New Year to you, too,” Evan said before he made his way to the party. He smiled at the people he walked past, wishing them the best. They were mostly drunk and excited to bring in a new year with new hopes and dreams. But come tomorrow, it’ll still be the same.

  It was always still the same.

  “Evan, my son!” was shouted from behind him, and he spun around to find AJ’s grandfather with a crown on his head and streamers around his neck.

  “Hello, s—”

  “Ah!” The grandfather raised his brow at him.

  “Hello, Granddad Marcus,” Evan corrected.

  AJ’s grandfather set his hand on Evan’s shoulder. “You look very smart. But your hair needs correcting.” He then smoothed back Evan’s hair. “Better. Much better. Don’t tell my granddaughter that I’ve had a few to drink tonight.”

  Evan laughed. “I won’t.”

  “She already knows you have, Dad,” Mr. Parker said. “Thanks for coming, Evan.”

  “Thank you for letting me,” Evan said.

  AJ’s father smiled. “My daughter’s toward the back with my wife.”

  “Nolan, you’re married?”

  Mr. Parker rolled his eyes. “Same joke he tells every year,” he said to Evan. “Yes, Dad. I’ve been married for twenty years.”

  “Same woman?”

  This time Evan laughed.

  “Same woman.”

  “Clara?”

  “Yes, Dad. Clara, my wife. The beautiful mother of my daughter.”

  Granddad Marcus’s face softened with pride. “You did good, son. Your girls … You did well.”

  Mr. Parker glanced over at Evan and winked. “She’s over there,” he informed, pointing behind him.

  Evan nodded and then spun around, leaving AJ’s father and grandfather. He pushed past more men and women until he broke free and was by the windows showcasing the Boston skyline. But that wasn’t what caught his eye.

  It was Alexandra.

  She wore an emerald dress that hit just above her knee. The straps of her dress had cuts in them, so it appeared as if it there were four straps, but there were only two. It was tight and showed off curves he never knew she had. How her father let her out in that dress dumbfounded him. Her dress showed more of her body than he was used to. It was the way she wore her hair in a curly bun, showing off her face and drawing him with those green eyes of hers. Her makeup made her eye color outshine her dress.

  Alexandra Parker was beautiful.

  More so when her eyes found him and that heavenly smile graced her pink lips.

  AJ excused herself from her mother and aunt and made her way toward him. “Hey,” she greeted, that smile of hers never leaving her eyes. “You made it.”

  He swallowed hard and nodded. “I did. Sorry, I’m so late.”

  “It’s okay. How was the Red Sox dinner?”

  Evan shrugged. “It was a lot of talking up Kyle.” He glanced over to find Mrs. Parker, AJ’s aunt, and grandmother staring at them with wide grins. He smiled to be polite and returned his focus to AJ. “How long until midnight?”

  AJ opened the black clutch she held and pulled out her phone. “Fifteen minutes,” she informed and returned her phone to her clutch.

  Christ.

  It had taken Evan a lot longer than he thought to make it to AJ.

  Evan then looked over his shoulder to find AJ’s father with her grandfather and uncle, his back turned to them. He didn’t dare look over to see her mother’s reaction as he took her hand in his. “Let’s go,” he said.

  AJ’s eyes widened. “What?”

  “Like Christmas.”

  “Evan, I can’t leave this building. Where would we go? It’s New Year’s Eve. There’s nowhere to make our own.”

  He smiled. “Come on,” he said.

  AJ hesitated, and then her eyes scanned around them. She pursed her lips before finally saying, “Okay.”

  He didn’t give her a spare second to change her mind. Evan dragged her away and led her out of the office space. When they reached the hallway, he turned right and walked them toward the stairwell. Evan pushed the door and led them up to the rooftop door. Once he had pushed it open, he led AJ onto the roof of G&MC.

  When they made it toward the railing, she let go of his hands and gazed out at the city. She set her clutch on the ledge, and her eyes scanned the skyline. Even Evan had to admit that it was a beautiful sight with her in it. Soon the fireworks would light up the sky, and he and AJ would have the best view in all of Boston.

  Sometime later, snow fell from the sky, and AJ turned around to face him. She lifted her head back and let out a small laugh as she raised her hand and snowflakes kissed her palm.

  Snow and Alexandra at that moment were a sight to behold.

  A beautiful, perfect sight.

  But then he saw her shiver, and Evan closed the space between them, his hands settling on her arms as her eyes found him.

  “I didn’t think. I’m sorry.”

  “For?” she asked, confusion consumed her face.

  “It’s freezing, AJ.”

  She scrunched her nose at his reason and shrugged. “I’ll live.”

  “Not if we stay out here. Come on, it’ll be the New Year soon.”

  AJ shook her head. “No. I want to spend the last second of this year and the very first seconds of next year on this rooftop with you.”

  “Really?”

  “Really.” Then AJ glanced down at the jacket he wore. “You’re wearing a Red Sox pin.”

  Evan’s hands fell from her arms as he looked down at his jacket and noticed that he hadn’t taken it off. He let Kyle persuade him to wear it. Evan never wore anything Red Sox related. AJ was the one who wore all the jerseys, pins, shirts, and caps.

  Not him.

  He loathed the Red Sox.

  He was just about to take it off when AJ reached up and unpinned it from his jacket. Then she turned
and set the pin next to her clutch on the concrete ledge. “There,” she said once she faced him.

  His heart pounded in his chest.

  That one act of hers made Evan him again.

  The true him.

  Suddenly, he heard people shout on the streets below.

  He didn’t have to look at his phone to know that the countdown had begun to welcome the New Year. Panic consumed him as he stepped closer to AJ and cupped her face in his palms.

  Her eyes softened as her lips parted.

  Evan’s chest rose and fell heavily.

  “Three,” AJ whispered.

  “Two,” Evan said.

  “One,” had escaped her before his lips captured hers.

  For a brief second, she flinched as he kissed her. Then Evan felt Alexandra’s hands on his hips as she kissed him back.

  Her soft, slightly warm lips were the life he needed.

  She breathed oxygen in him with each flutter of their kiss.

  He knew right from wrong.

  He was aware that he was kissing his best friend.

  He was convinced that this one flawless kiss was right.

  The way his heart ached and stretched with rightness and relief was all he needed to know as he slowed down their kiss and then pulled back. Evan opened his eyes to find AJ’s still closed, as if she were memorizing the feel of his lips on hers.

  Finally, her vibrant, sparkling green eyes met his as Evan pressed his forehead to hers and whispered, “Eight protons. Eight neutrons.” It was barely audible, but he knew she could just hear him as fireworks erupted the night sky.

  “Happy New Year, Evan,” AJ said above the fireworks as her eyes searched his.

  Evan’s lips curved into a small smile as he said, “Happy New Year, Alexandra.”

  Eight protons. Eight neutrons.

  25 Mn

  manganese

  AJ

  Now

  As AJ made her way across East campus and toward the Wilson dormitory after her quantum mechanics and thermal physics class, she felt her phone vibrate in her jacket pocket. She pulled it out and noticed a number her phone did not have saved in her contacts. When she unlocked her phone, the first word in the text message was all she needed to see to know that it was him. So AJ saved his number on her phone and then read what he had texted her.