Savin' Me (A Heat Wave Novel)

by Alannah Lynne

  “She moved away, and I didn’t know she was back. I don’t even know how she knew about this house because I haven’t seen her since I built it.” He attempted a laugh. “Such is life in a small town. Even two hours away, everyone knows your business.”

  “Would you rather be with her?” It sounded like a silly, girly question, but Kat wanted to get it out there, clear the air, and move on. She also hoped Erik would answer her honestly.

  “Jesus Christ. No! That’s the problem. I don’t want to be with anyone else. That doesn’t mean I haven’t. But I constantly find myself comparing them to you… and every single one has come up short.”

  Hearing him talk about being with others caused jealous greed to burn, and every muscle clenched resentfully. She stopped, wrapped her arms around his neck, and pulled him down for a scalding, branding kiss. She bit his lip, marking him, making sure he knew he belonged to her, at least for this weekend.

  She felt like a possessed woman, wanting to ensure she was never forgotten. She kissed a trail along the side of his scruffy jaw, relishing the telltale signs she knew it would leave on her face. Her fingers trembled as she unbuttoned his shirt, then trailed kisses down his chest, following the patches of skin revealed by the separating fabric.

  A sigh escaped as she slipped the fabric from his shoulders and admired the smooth expanse of exposed flesh. She treasured the shiver that wracked his body as she licked, then nipped one of his small, pebbled nipples.

  It was dark, and they’d stopped on a deserted section of beach. Taking advantage of the seclusion, she dropped to her knees and kissed a trail along his stomach as low as his clothing would allow. His shorts were tied with a drawstring, and in a matter of seconds, she’d slid them and his boxers over his hips, freed his cock, and had it wrapped in her hands.

  His head dropped back and a hiss pushed through his teeth as she licked and sucked on the engorged head. Small, precisely placed flicks, licks, and swirls had his chest heaving and his hips thrusting forward. She wrapped her lips over the tip, sucking enough to tease, but not enough to satisfy.

  He pushed his fingers through her hair, then grasped a fistful, trying to move her head and manipulate the speed and depth of her mouth.

  Despite her greedy need to devour, she stopped and rolled her gaze up to his. Her expression let him know she was in charge, and he had no control over the speed or timing of the eventual outcome.

  Through the filtered light of the moon she saw his eyes, full of heat and rampant desire. His jaw muscle flexed as he clenched his teeth and dropped his hands, putting himself in her control.

  Fueled by his surrender, a deeper need erupted within her. She resumed her ministrations, combining efforts of hands, tongue, and lips. It didn’t take long before he shuddered and ground out a warning. “You’d better stop. Now.”

  She clamped her fist tightly around the base and blew a gentle stream of air across his slick and heated flesh. When she sensed the tide receding, she started back with the sensual assault. She swirled her tongue along the most sensitive spots, then slid down the length of him until he nudged the back of her throat. Greedy and needy, she wanted all of him. She took a deep breath, relaxed her throat muscles, and continued her descent until her nose rested against his flesh and curls.

  He tensed, then trembled. Struggling to hold back, he groaned. “Shit, Kat. You’re killing me.”

  She slowly withdrew and caught his gaze. “What did you say about an ice cream cone? Something about a lick here?” She licked underneath, from base to tip, and watched his jaw flex. “And a nibble there.” She gently nipped the sensitive tip, then soothed the sting with a swirl of her tongue. “Did you mention sucking?”

  As she wrapped her lips around him and took his entire length into her mouth, his control shattered. He grabbed her head and growled as she took him down her throat, continuing to suck and pull until he jerked away, too sensitive for the contact.

  She dropped tender kisses along his thighs, then up his stomach to his heaving chest. One look at his face had her wanting to ask what he was thinking, but it would’ve been pointless. She doubted he’d be honest, even with himself. And besides, it didn’t matter what he said. His expression said it all. He was as terrified as he was satisfied.

  ***

  Erik cradled Kat’s cheek in his palm and rubbed the pad of his thumb over her red and swollen lips as he sucked in cool, calming breaths. “You are amazing.”

  And she was tearing him from his frame.

  He’d never had a blow job like that, and the thought of how she’d become so proficient at the act left him agitated. First the flowers, then Kevin, and now his growing contempt for her ex-lovers. No, he wasn’t the jealous type.

  Not at all.

  He mentally cursed and chastised himself. He wished he could say the added sensory stimulation from the moon, wind, and waves had added to the pleasurable experience, but that wasn’t it.

  Emotions were coming into play, and this was transcending sex. With every touch, kiss, and incredible suck, he fell in deeper and deeper.

  He recognized this particular act for what it was: a woman’s need to mark her man. The scary part was, he didn’t care. Hell, at this moment, if she wanted to tattoo her name on his ass, he’d go buy the fucking ink.

  He retied his pants and picked up his shirt. Taking her by the hand, he headed back to the house and said, “What do you say we grab some food and take it upstairs to the deck?”

  “That sounds great. Far away from the clutches of Lizbeth, I’ll be safer up there.”

  Her tone was teasing, and he appreciated her understanding about Lizbeth, but he questioned the accuracy of her statement. “I’m not so sure that’s the safest place for you. I’ll have plenty of time to recover by then. You might be in serious trouble.”

  She smiled and batted her eyes. “I crave trouble.”

  After filling plates with enough BBQ, potatoes, green beans, and hush puppies to feed them for days, Erik headed to his upstairs suite with Kat close on his heels. He set the food on the deck table, then turned to go back inside for drinks and a blanket.

  Kat stood in the doorway, bent over at the waist, shaking out her hair, with her dress puddled at her feet. She righted herself, and, wearing only a thong and a smile, said, “I wanted to be ready… for when you’re ready.”

  “When it comes to you, I’m always ready.”

  She walked toward him with slow, purposeful strides that made her hips sway in the most hypnotic way. “Are you sure?”

  Never taking his eyes off her, he slid his shorts and boxers off and sat in an Adirondack chair. Stroking his erection enticingly, he said, “What do you think?”

  She was a wet dream come to life as she swayed toward him, her eyes locked on his fist, firm breasts bouncing with each step, long hair swishing across her back. Straddling him, she threaded her feet into the space between the chair and seat and lowered herself onto his lap.

  Her eyes drifted closed, and she moaned as she planted her hands on his chest and scooted forward so the only thing separating them was the tiny triangle of her thong.

  He held her in place at the waist and ground against her slick heat. Jesus, he was an idiot. How could he have thought he’d ever get enough of this woman?

  Leaning back against the incline of his legs, she opened herself and gave him full access to her body. As he slid his palm along her slender side to the swell of her breast, she arched in a silent plea for more. He gently cupped the heavy weight in his palm, then pinched her nipple sharply.

  She gasped and moaned and wiggled on his lap, trying to get closer and create more friction.

  He closed his eyes and took a deep breath, forcing himself to calm before he came from nothing more than her grinding against him. He trailed his free hand along her inner thigh to the edge of her panties. Through the fabric, he worked his thumb in slow, steady circles over her clit until her body trembled, then stiffened with a fast-approaching orgasm.

 
When she bit down on her lip, a sure sign she was about to explode, he shoved the fabric of her panties aside and pushed into her. She cried out, then leaned forward and captured his gaze with hers. He wanted to break the connection and look away, but was trapped.

  No words were spoken; they didn’t need them. Her feelings were written in her expression and poured out of her with every move. Every time she impaled herself with a steady rise and fall… rise and fall… rise and fall… there was a silent I love you whispered in the air.

  And even though the words refused to breach his lips, his body screamed them in return.

  He cupped her breasts in one hand, ran his tongue along her jawline and down her collarbone, and stroked her clit with his other hand. Within moments, she fell over the edge into climatic bliss with him following right behind.

  His body was still pumping into her when his blood ran cold and his heart seized with panic. He’d been so caught up in the moment, he’d forgotten a condom. Shock and disbelief tore through him. “Kat,” he gasped through panic and a parched throat. “I didn’t wear a condom.”

  She dropped her head onto his shoulder and drug in a few deep breaths of her own. “It’s okay. I’m on the pill.”

  He grabbed her by the shoulders and pushed her back so she was at arm’s length and he could see her face. “It’s not okay.” His rough grasp and harsh tone had her opening sleepy eyes and trying to focus on him. “It was incredibly stupid and careless of me. I swear to you I’ve never had sex with anyone without a condom before. I’m completely clean.”

  She smiled sweetly and with soft, loving strokes ran her hand down the side of his face. “I believe you. I’m clean too, so we’re fine.”

  She rested her head on his chest and snuggled her arms around his waist. With her wrapped in his arms, listening to the thunderous roar of the waves crashing on the beach and the outrageous party going on below them, this could have been a perfect moment.

  But Erik couldn’t shut off his internal ramblings long enough to enjoy it.

  She was the most beautiful woman in the world to him, both outwardly and inwardly. How could he not love this giving, compassionate, sensual woman?

  But what would his love do to her?

  Would he end up destroying her like he had Lindsey?

  He had no doubts about Kat’s feelings. They’d been written on her face and carried through every movement. She loved him… And that was something he couldn’t tolerate.

  Chapter Thirteen

  Kat slid her fingers across the soft sheets, reaching for Erik. The sheets were cold. The house was still. And an all-encompassing emptiness, very different than the previous morning when she’d woken alone, grabbed her with icy fingers and pulled her into the frigid void.

  She opened her eyes and searched the room, knowing she wouldn’t find Erik, but needing to look anyway. As she took in the missing details—Erik’s clothes, shoes and wallet—her heart closed in on itself in a belated protective measure, and cold numbness washed through her veins.

  She didn’t see a note, or any kind of confirmation, but deep in her soul she knew he was gone. Gone from the room. Gone from the house. And specifically, gone from her life.

  She’d made a mistake by showing all of her cards last night. She loved him and she couldn’t pretend otherwise. And though she wouldn’t have changed it, even if she could, it had been too much for him to handle.

  What frustrated her most was knowing he cared too. He, however, seemed determined to fight his feelings at all cost.

  Assuming he had indeed abandoned her—at his house, no less—she should be furious. But she couldn’t muster up the mad. All she felt was a heavy, gut-wrenching sadness. Sadness for him because of his obvious pain, a pain she didn’t understand because he kept her locked out of that part of his life. And sadness for herself because, by loving him, she pushed him away.

  She flung off the sheets with a sigh. Lying here feeling sorry for herself wasn’t going to get her anywhere. She might as well face the world and figure out a way back to Riverside.

  Showered and dressed, she grabbed a Diet Coke from the bedroom’s mini fridge and made her way through the mess in the house and out to the deck. Steve sat in one of the Adirondack chairs, a two-liter of Coke in one hand, a bottle of Tylenol in the one with the cast. He had his baseball hat pulled low over his eyes and appeared to be sleeping. But when the French door opened, he shifted, then twisted to look at her.

  “Hey,” she said, dropping into the chair next to him. She propped her feet on the railing, wrapped one arm around her waist, and took a drink of her Diet Coke.

  “Hey.”

  No “good mornings” uttered here, and she was grateful he didn’t feel the need to pretend it was.

  From the corner of her eye, she saw him watching her. After a few awkward moments, he adjusted his ball cap and said, “You know… technically, the sonovabitch left me.”

  This was painful and embarrassing and she didn’t want to talk about it, but the subject couldn’t be avoided. Everyone knew Erik was gone, or they would soon enough. And, on top of that, she needed someone to give her a ride back to Riverside.

  She looked at Steve from the corner of her eye. “What do you mean?”

  “Bastard stole my bike.” He grinned as her eyes widened. “He’s not a total ass. He left a note saying he wanted you to have his car to get home.”

  Well, that solved the problem of getting home, but… He’d left a note for Steve and not for her? “Huh. I think I might disagree with you about that total ass part.”

  She had a million questions about Erik’s past and why he was so afraid of caring for anyone. But she didn’t want to push Steve for answers, so she said nothing. She stared at the water, finding it hard to believe that everything appeared exactly the same as yesterday. The kids were splashing and playing. The waves were crashing on the shore. The seagulls were circling against a gorgeous blue sky.

  But today, she was crumbling into a million pieces. It was true—the world didn’t stop for broken hearts.

  Whistling from the steps interrupted her pity party, and she looked in that direction to see who the next witness to her humiliation would be. When Kevin reached the top of the landing and saw Steve, he stopped in his tracks and his whistle died out in a way that would’ve been humorous under different circumstances.

  He scanned the driveway, then looked back at Steve. “Where’s your bike?”

  Steve threw his hands in the air. “Beats the shit out of me.”

  Kevin slid his gaze to Kat as he cautiously made his way across the deck.

  She gave him a small finger wave and said, “Hey.”

  “Hi.” His eyes narrowed as he glanced around, and his voice held a hard edge when he said, “Where’s Erik?”

  Steve did the shit-if-I-know hand toss again. “I assume with my bike.”

  Kevin stiffened and grew unnaturally still. His eyes darkened to almost black, and the fierceness firing from them caused a chill to creep over Kat. She made a quick mental note. Never, ever piss off Kevin Mazze.

  He drew in a breath and, with what appeared to be great effort, relaxed his features before shifting his gaze to Kat.

  Trying to sound lighthearted rather than brokenhearted, she lifted a shoulder and joked. “I guess I’m too much for him to handle.”

  Kevin leaned against the railing, crossed one ankle over the other, and placed his hands on the banister at either side of his hips. He studied the deck boards as if they were tea leaves, then shifted his focus to Steve.

  She didn’t understand the unasked question registering on his face, but apparently Steve did because he shrugged and said, “Up to ya.”

  “Sugar,” Kevin said, then paused and took a deep breath. “I’d love to put you in my truck, take you home, and spend the rest of the day convincing you of all the ways I’m better than Erik.” He winked as a wicked grin spread across his face. “And I am better than Erik.”

  Despite the tension hanging
in the air and the sadness clawing at her soul, she laughed. Physically, he didn’t do anything for her. But she had no problem believing, with his bodybuilder physique and his dark, assessing attitude, he was quite capable of making a woman weak in the knees.

  The smile dropped from his face and he frowned. “But Erik needs you.”

  “Ummm… Apparently not.”

  “Yeah, he does.” He scrubbed a hand over his face and blew out a harsh breath. “Christ, I can’t believe I’m defending the dumbass, but it’s obvious he cares about you. A lot. And that’s the part he can’t handle.”

  Having Kevin confirm Erik’s feelings gave Kat a flutter of hope. Deep down, she knew he cared. But considering the current circumstance, she questioned whether those feelings were real, or if she just wanted it so desperately she imagined it.

  He chuckled. “He called me before our first meeting and threatened to rip my heart out if I hit on you. I knew then that you were something special.” His laughter built. “Damn, it was fun playing cards and drinking shots with you. He was so pissed off I thought he would pop a nut.”

  His laughter faded into sadness. “Erik’s never run from anything in his life. The fact that he’s gone now shows the magnitude of how messed up he is.” He cast a quick glance at Steve before continuing. “I don’t know how much he’s told you about his past…”

  “He hasn’t told me much. I know he was almost engaged, but I don’t know what happened.”

  His throat bobbed with his effort to swallow, and his eyes grew cloudy. “Her name was Lindsey, and it didn’t end well. I don’t know how he survived it. I’m not sure I would have.”

  She shifted her attention to Steve, who wore a solemn expression that matched Kevin’s. He was staring at the ocean and seemed a million miles away.

  “I’ve tried to get him to open up and talk to me. That’s how I found out he’d been engaged… almost engaged. But when not completely shutting me out, he’s been vague.”