“He said he wanted me.”
Sam crouched beside her. “Hey, baby.”
“Your guests…?”
“Ty and Tex are wrapping things up. You’ve been down here a long time.” Every word was laced with worry. “I can’t take being away from you for another second. This is where I want to be. With you, dealing with all the shit that went down. Please don’t send me away.”
Tears filled her eyes. “The last thing I want is to send you away.”
Vivian touched Faith’s arm, a silent message of support passing between them—I’ll leave you guys alone, okay?
“I’ll help Ty and Tex clean up, and then Tex can take me back to pick up my car.” Vivian hugged Faith and whispered, “Don’t judge. His tats are hot and I’ve been on a long hiatus.”
Faith needed the smile Vivian’s words gave her, but when she turned back to Sam, he was reaching for her hand, and her heart tumbled anew.
“Want to walk and talk or sit?” he asked.
She silently pulled him down to the sand and drew in a deep breath. Gazing out over the river brought memories of their rafting trip and the night Sam told her he was falling in love with her. She’d had such big plans for tonight, none of which included the uncomfortable tension hovering around them.
“I’m sorry, Sam. I hope I didn’t make a scene up there and embarrass you.”
“You didn’t make a scene, but it would take a lot more than that to embarrass me.” He reached for her hand, and she was glad he did, because it meant he needed the connection as much as she did. “Baby, I’m sorry for whatever I said to Warner—JJ—that might have led him to hurt you.”
“I know you are. I’ve been thinking about everything we’ve gone through. Everything I’ve gone through since he and I broke up. I thought he’d broken me back then. He devastated me completely. Shattered my safe little life into a million pieces, but he didn’t break me. He kicked me in the gut and woke me up. I think I needed it. No man is that unhappy in a relationship unless there’s a reason. I was the reason. He was right about that.”
“Faith—”
“Hear me out. I’m not saying he should have cheated. He was a supreme asshole for doing that. But that doesn’t change the fact that the things he said back then were true. I was wrapped up in work and school and friends and family. But I wasn’t wrapped up in him. His cheating forced me to take a look at myself and to figure out who I was. And it was a long, hard road, Sam. I cried a lot, doubted myself and my ability to love and be loved, but I also found my pride and discovered that I am a person who goes all out for work and who makes a website because she’s hurt. That’s me. That’s never going to change.”
**
SAM’S HEART HAD lodged in his throat the moment he’d made the connection between Warner and Faith and himself. He hated that today had unearthed so much hurt from Faith’s past. Hurt he’d give anything to obliterate.
“Faith, you don’t have to tell me who you are. I know who you are. I love who you are, how hard you work, and that you go out of your way to help others. I love that you call me on my shit and that you blush when I turn you on. I’m not Warner. I respect you and want you to have a full life—with me and on your own.”
“I believe you,” she said, eyes trained on the ground. “But self-doubt slid in somewhere between knowing who I was and what happened up there, and it made me wonder if I had regressed. Did I fall back into my old patterns of being too wrapped up in work or my website to see what was right under my nose? Did I go from one man who would cheat to another?”
His chest compressed with the weight of her confession. Had his past finally come back to slaughter him?
“I can’t deny that voice in my head appeared in all this, because if I did, then I’d know I had reverted to the person I used to be, and I’m not that person. So I’m going to tell you the rest of what went through my head over all of this, because that’s who we are. You and I honor our crazy feelings, right?”
We. We still have we. Thank Christ. “Absofuckinglutely. The good, the bad, the crazy, and anything in between. If you feel it, I want to feel it, too.”
“Good.” She looked into his eyes and with a trembling voice said, “It was really hard to hear him say you told him to cheat on me.”
He bit back the urge to once again define what he would or wouldn’t have said, because he’d said his piece, and he knew she needed him to hear her out.
“Then I remembered what you’ve said to me since before we started going out,” she said in a softer tone. “Cheating is a cognitive, willful act, a decision someone makes knowing the pain they’ll cause to their partner. Sam, it wouldn’t have mattered what you said to him back then. If he was going to cheat, he was going to cheat. He took what you said as, I don’t know, some kind of warped blessing to act on what he wanted to do or something.”
He let out a breath he hadn’t realized was trapped. “Thank God you see that.”
She smiled, giving him another lifeline to cling to. “The other thing I figured out during this terrifying time of introspection that I wish I never had is that who he was, or is, doesn’t change who I am now. Or who you are. I’m stronger than I was, more aware of who I am and what I want. And more importantly, I didn’t jump into this relationship—our relationship—with my eyes closed. I know who you are, and I trust you, Sam. Explicitly.”
She shifted onto Sam’s lap and wrapped her arms around his neck. Emotions bloomed in his chest.
“When I agreed to go out with you,” she said in the same sweet tone she usually used with him, making his chest constrict for a whole new, wonderful, reason, “I accepted your past as part of the package. What happened with that jerk was part of that package, the same way he’s part of my baggage, which you so graciously accepted.”
“Baby, do you have any idea how incredible you are? Or how proud I am to be your boyfriend?”
“Right.” She laughed. “The crazy girl who talks in circles?”
“No. The intelligent, stubborn woman who won’t back down from her principles. I couldn’t love you more.” He pressed his lips to hers. “Damn. Look at that. I love you more than I did a second ago.” He kissed her again. “Okay, I was wrong. I could, and will, love you more every second of every day.”
She laughed. “Want to hear the craziest thing about all of this?”
“There’s more craziness?”
“I think it comes with dating me,” she teased. “All I’ve wanted to do since the moment you told me you were falling in love with me was to say it back. I’ve been waiting for the perfect time because I wanted to make it as romantic and wonderful as it was when you said it. I thought that time would be tonight, just the two of us down here by the water, after your big day. I had this elaborate scheme planned, like you did for our first date. I was going to leave you clues to find me down here by the water, where I’d be waiting inside a circle I drew on the beach.”
Dear God, I’m the luckiest man on earth. “A circle?”
“Beauty in evolution and imperfection.” She climbed off his lap and drew a circle in the sand. His heart thundered as she took his hand, bringing him into the circle with her.
“My friend Google told me a circle is the symbol of imperfection.” She wrapped her arms around his waist. “And we’re the symbol of evolution.”
He gazed into her loving eyes, drowning in her all over again.
“Sam?”
“Yeah?” he choked out of his emotionally clogged throat.
“I don’t think you’re breathing.” She pressed her palm to his chest and smiled up at him. “I think you’re waiting.”
She knew him so well he didn’t even try to respond.
“I love you, Sam, imperfections and all.” She went up on her toes, hovering a breath away from his. “Sam?” She pressed her hand to his cheek.
He was so full of emotions, “Mm?” was all he could manage.
“You need to kiss me now.”
Epilogue
Three weeks later…
“IT’S HARD TO believe this is where it all started for you and Faith.” Sam’s mother threaded her hand through his arm. They’d closed Mr. B’s for the celebratory dinner with the Fishers after Krissy’s dance recital, which was spectacular. Krissy danced like it was what she’d been born to do.
Sam hadn’t been able to take his eyes off of Faith all night. She stood across the room talking with Leesa, Jewel, and Tempe and swaying to the music in her little black dress. She’d been stealing glances at him all night, sending a shock of heat with each one.
“It started long before that night, Mom. I just didn’t realize it.” Faith had moved into his cabin two weeks ago, and Lira was taking over the lease on her apartment. Sam had offered Lira the opportunity to work remotely for however long she wanted to, but she’d decided a clean break was better than living in the shadow of her hurtful past. Sam didn’t blame her. After all, that’s what Faith had done, and look how lucky he was because of it. He hoped Lira would find happiness in Peaceful Harbor, too.
His mother smiled up at him, her thick blond curls framing her happy face.
“I’ve never said much to you about your personal life, but I want you to know that I never judged you for how you chose to live. We all take different paths, Sammy. Yours led you to Faith.”
“Thanks, Mom. That means a lot to me.”
She glanced across the room. “She’s wonderful, you know.”
“I know.” Faith glanced over, and he blew her a kiss. She touched her lips, as if she felt it land.
“You’re wonderful, too, sweetheart.” She kissed his cheek.
“You’re a little biased,” he teased as his father and Nate joined them.
His father draped an arm around their mother and said, “Three down, three to go.”
“Two,” Ty said. “I’m holding out for a mountain-climbing vixen with an eye for risk and a body made for—”
“Ty!” Their mother shook her head. “I don’t want or need to hear the end of that sentence.”
“What?” Ty asked with innocent eyes. “I’m leaving next week for a photography assignment in Spain, and I plan on enjoying the culture in as many ways as possible.”
Nate jumped on that, and Sam took the opportunity to cross the room and steal time with his favorite person.
Cole fell into step with him before he reached Faith. “I talked to Jon.”
Sam stopped, turning his attention to Cole. “And?”
“He’s cool with four weeks of vacation for Faith so she can travel with you, but we need at least two weeks’ notice before any trip that’s longer than four days so we can bring in a temp.”
“You’re the best. Thanks.”
“No worries, but I have a feeling your girlfriend won’t like you going around her.”
He was right about that, but soon enough she’d have plenty of planning to do, and he just wanted to ease this one worry. “It was for a good cause. I think she’ll forgive me.”
**
FAITH’S PULSE QUICKENED with each of Sam’s determined steps. Her world had changed so much in the past few weeks, and Sam had been with her every step of the way. The resource page she’d created for Women Against Cheaters was getting almost two thousand hits a day, and tomorrow she and Sam were going to a small-business meeting together to see if they could gain community support for the group in other ways. Work was as busy as ever, and her professional relationship with Cole hadn’t suffered. If anything, they had an even stronger relationship because of it.
“Sammy’s on the prowl,” Tempest whispered to her. “How do you stand him looking at you like that?”
She hoped she never had to live a day when he didn’t look at her that way.
“Ladies.” Sam stepped between Tempest and Leesa and drew Faith into his arms. “Missed you.” He kissed her tenderly.
Tempest sighed. “I don’t know what love potion you’ve given him, but when I find a man, can you please inject him with whatever it is?”
Faith laughed, vaguely aware of the girls moving away and very aware of Sam’s big body pressed against hers.
“You scared everyone away.” She wrapped her arms around his neck, not unhappy that he scared them off, even if a little embarrassed. But she’d learned that was part of being with Sam, too. That hint of embarrassment came from his overwhelming love for her, and she wouldn’t trade that for the world.
Sam didn’t respond to her halfhearted complaint. She knew he wouldn’t have cared if he’d scared off an army, just another thing she piled onto the mountain of things she loved about him.
They moved to the music, gazing into each other’s eyes, and Faith was sure the touch of their bodies was throwing sparks for all to see. They fell into this position, dancing to a beat—existent or not—at least once a day, and it usually led to them ravenously devouring each other. Sometimes when they were cooking dinner or taking a walk, Sam would take her in his arms and sing while they danced, which was her favorite thing of all. She loved the way he sang straight from his heart, his emotions sailing directly into hers.
“Remember when you wouldn’t dance with me?” he asked.
“I don’t think I’ll ever forget. Turning you down was the hardest thing I’ve ever done.” The room was so quiet, save for the music and their bodies brushing against each other. She wondered if everyone was watching them, but Sam was blocking her view. My Greedy Sam.
“I’m glad I don’t have to ask anymore.”
“Me too.”
“There are lots of things I don’t have to ask about anymore.” He pressed his lips to hers. “Like that.” He nuzzled against her neck. “And this.”
“Sam,” she said with a giggle. “That drives me crazy.”
He pressed his cheek to hers and said, “I know.”
A river of shivers flowed down her spine. He leaned back far enough to look into her eyes, and the depth of emotions in his stilled her heart.
“There’s one thing I still have to ask you.”
“Really? I thought I’d given you carte blanche to my entire being.”
“I want carte blanche to your entire future. Trips, babies, dancing beneath the stars. I want to get old and gray with you, and when we have too many wrinkles to count, they’ll be our wrinkles, baby. Our imperfections, each one born from a life we spent loving each other.”
Her throat closed as tears spilled down her cheeks.
“Marry me, Faith. Let me love you, embarrass you, and dance with you until the day you bury me six feet under. Then I’ll wait for you on the other side, knowing that whatever else there is, we’ll experience it together.”
She swallowed a few times, maybe a dozen, trying to force words from her lungs, but her heart had swelled and her chest had constricted, and she could barely stand. She nodded vehemently.
“Baby, I—”
“Need to hear it?” she managed, a half laugh, half cry bursting free. “Like you’d ever let me say no? Yes, Sam. I want to be your wife. I want to have our babies, and take trips, and get wrinkly. But what I want most of all is to have you look at me like you are right now for the rest of my life.”
Sam’s mouth came possessively down over hers as he lifted her to her feet and spun her around.
“I love you, baby,” he said, and it was then the rest of the room came into focus. The women were crying and smiling, hugging one another, while the men beamed and cheered.
“Just one more thing.” Sam lowered her feet to the ground and reached into his pocket, pulled out a sparkling diamond engagement ring, and slid it on her trembling finger.
She couldn’t take her eyes off of the circular diamond, surrounded by another perfect circle of round diamonds. A trail of round diamonds ran down the center of the wide band, bordered by intricate designs in white gold. Her vision blurred with fresh tears.
“Sam, it’s beautiful. It’s so us.”
“Our circle forever, baby.” He kissed her again, long and languor
ously, which made everyone hoot and holler.
“Smile, baby. You’re on family camera.” He pointed to the television above the bar, where her parents, Vivian, Charley, Mack, and Sam’s sister, Shannon, were waving and congratulating them at once.
Thankfully, Sam held her around her waist, because her noodle legs were nearly useless.
“How? You’ve never even met my family.” She waved to her parents. Her mother’s eyes were wet, her nose pink from crying, and her father smiled proudly down at her. “I love you Mom. Dad.”
“We love you, pumpkin,” her father said.
“I couldn’t ask you to marry me without speaking with your parents first,” Sam explained. “Vivian, who would do anything for you, did this for me.”
Faith covered her mouth, trying to keep the sobs from breaking free as she looked up at her best friend. Vivian’s tears mirrored her own, and they both mouthed, Love you, at the same time.
Sam’s mom was the first one to embrace Faith. “Congratulations, sweetheart. We’re so happy to have you in our lives.”
She was passed from one person to the next, in a flood of hugs and tears and welcome to the familys. Faith finally found her voice and talked with her family and Vivian over Skype. Before signing off, she and Sam planned a trip to Oak Falls to visit her family, and Vivian planned a visit to Peaceful Harbor. Faith had a feeling she’d see very little of Vivian on the trip, since she’d confided in Faith that she’d been keeping in touch with Tex. So much for her hiatus.
As the evening came to an end, Sam drew her close for one final dance at Mr. B’s. “Now all we have to do is pick a date.”
“Why do I have a feeling you’ve already got one in mind?”
—Ready for more Bradens?—
Buy SHANNON’S book, CRUSHING ON LOVE
Steve Johnson is living his life’s passion watching over the Colorado Mountains as a ranger and wildlife consultant. But his peaceful life is upended when overzealous and insanely beautiful Shannon Braden flits back into his life after returning from a brief trip home to Maryland. He thought his attraction to her was under control—after all, she’s only in Colorado temporarily, and he doesn’t do casual affairs.
River of Love Page 26