Amelia's Deception

by GG Shalton

  After a few moments, he broke his stare from the baby and looked at her. “Amelia, you will stop this loathing every time I am around you. We will be civil, or I will not see you on my visits.”

  Amelia’s voice was shaking. “Loathing? Are you jesting? You leave your child for weeks, and when you return, I have to appease your mood swings.”

  The baby stirred and she whispered loudly, “Look, I already apologized for my wrong decision—I wish it never happened. I can’t change it!” Taking in a deep breath, she touched his arm that held the baby. “I don’t wish to live like this. Do you care about me at all?”

  Andrew studied his wife’s face in silence. It was the first time in their acquaintance that she had asked him such a personal question about his feelings for her. He had longed at one time to confess his affection and have it returned. But he didn’t trust her and had to guard his heart.

  He whispered locking her eyes with his. “You’re the mother of my son, and I hold that in high regard. But with everything we have been through, you are now like an employee who takes care of my son. I can’t see you as anything more than that.” He lied.

  Amelia’s face turned deep red showing sadness mixed with anger. She stood up facing Andrew. “If that is all Mr. Baird, may I take my son to the nursery?”

  He looked at her standing in front of him noticing how her womanly curves had accentuated more lusciously since having a child. It stirred up feelings in his body that he wanted to ignore, and he had to look away. She addressed him formally as Mr. Baird, and although it annoyed him, he would not correct her. His feelings for her had not changed—and no matter how hard he wanted to dismiss them, she still moved him like no other. He bent down and kissed the baby and handed him to Amelia. She took the baby and walked away from Andrew without saying a word.

  Andrew worked in the small study for the rest of the afternoon choosing not to return to the inn. He would never admit it to his men, but he wanted to be close to her and Robert.

  Before dinner, he went up to the nursery and spent some time with Robert. Amelia stayed in her room not wanting to speak to Andrew. As dinnertime approached, Brian, Bull and a few other guards joined Andrew in the dining room. They waited for Amelia.

  Growing annoyed, he whispered to the housekeeper. “Mrs. Palmer, could you tell my wife that dinner is ready and we await her presence?”

  Her face grew white. “Forgive me, Mr. Baird. Mrs. Baird took a tray to her room thirty minutes ago when I told her you were here dining with some friends.”

  Andrew clenched his jaw having to force the words out of his mouth. “Did she say anything else?”

  The housekeeper clutched the folds of her gown in fear. “Um… She said something peculiar about being an employee and not dining with her betters when Mr. Baird was at home. I didn’t understand her, but she shut the door in my face before I could ask any other questions, so I went to fetch her tray.”

  Andrew looked away from the housekeeper and motioned to the footman. He addressed his friends. “Amelia will not be joining us this evening. I have asked the footman to serve our first course.” The men began to speak louder about a few of the women in the tavern next to the inn. Andrew didn’t engage in the conversation and instead stared at his plate taking a drink of wine lost in his thoughts.

  Brian addressed him. “Andrew, tell them about the time you watched old lady Rhonda’s cats.”

  Andrew looked up with a smile on his face. “You mean the cat lady?” He knew what Brian was trying to do with getting his mind thinking about something else and lightening the mood. “Yes, she even looked like her cats growing up.”

  Andrew smiled at the memory. “She always had many cats coming in and out of her home. She treated them like her children. One day she offered me some money to watch them for her. I was only around one and three and thought it would be easy money. I made Brian and Ian help me. My little brother left the kitchen window open in her house and all the cats disappeared. We ran all over the street trying to find the cats before she got home. I had to climb trees, crawl under carriages, go into people’s homes, and chase cats down the street. I had scratches, bites, and probably fleas by the time we finished collecting them all and putting them back inside her house.” He shook his head looking at Brian.

  Bull smiled. “What happened when she returned home?”

  Andrew tilted his head. “She refused to pay me because she said they were a mess and had been outside. I don’t know how she knew, but somehow she did.” Andrew leaned back in his chair. “But she did pay me all right. It was the beginning of the respect that I demanded.”

  Brian laughed. “She even paid with interest.”

  They laughed together not indulging on how Andrew got paid. They knew of his reputation and chose to keep quiet.

  Dinner concluded shortly afterward. Andrew went upstairs to check on Robert. He was sleeping, and the nurse was out of the room. Andrew touched his son’s face as his heart clenched seeing how fragile he looked sleeping so peacefully. He left him alone and went down the hallway. Stopping in front of Amelia’s door, he contemplated if he should open it or not. He had no idea what he would even say. After a few moments, he chose to leave her alone and went back to the inn with his friends.

  After being there for a little while and not being able to enjoy himself, he went back to the cottage and slept in the chair beside the crib. Watching his son sleep tugged at his heart. Never an emotional man, his chest ached to protect him.

  The next morning Amelia awoke early and was startled to find Andrew asleep with Robert in his arms. Her eyes watered watching them together and thoughts of what could have been. Mrs. Franklin went into town to visit her family, and Amelia needed to feed the baby. Not wanting to wake him, she carefully removed the baby from his arms.

  Amelia hummed quietly as she rocked back and forth until she heard a noise coming from her husband. She looked up stunned to see Andrew awake and staring at her breast. Embarrassed at being exposed, she reached for a blanket to cover herself. “I didn’t know you were awake.”

  Andrew shook his head at her and smirked. “It’s okay, it’s only me. I have seen you naked.”

  Amelia looked away trying to cover her breast. “I don’t think it’s proper for you to watch me feed Robert. After all, I am only your employee.”

  Andrew smirked playfully, “True. But some employers exercise such rights. We could engage in an arrangement if you desire.”

  She glared at him and threw a linen at his head. He ducked in surprise at her playful behavior and laughed. Amelia tried to keep a straight face but laughed too. It was the first time since she moved to Dundee that she laughed with him. “You must be jesting.”

  She took Robert from her chest and wiped his mouth carefully ensuring that a blanket covered her from exposing herself any more than she already had. She held him to burp him and handed him to Andrew. Turning away from Andrew, she adjusted her gown giving him a glimpse of her back.

  Andrew tried to look away but couldn’t help noticing her smooth back and perfectly curved neck. Desire for her was affecting him. When she faced him again, completely dressed and covered, he couldn’t help but feel a bit disappointment in his gut.

  Andrew kissed his son on the cheek and handed him back to Amelia. He had to get out of there quickly, or he would lose control. “I must go back to Edinburgh. I will be back soon to visit.”

  Amelia looked down at Robert ignoring Andrew. Andrew bent over to kiss him one more time while she held him. Her scent invaded his nose causing him to remember their closeness. He turned away and walked out the door before he could do something that he would regret.

  He found Mrs. Palmer in the kitchen. “I have some money for her art supplies. You have kept our secret?”

  Mrs. Palmer nodded. “Yes, sir. She thinks we have some extra money left over each mont
h from the household accounts. She has no idea that you bought her the paints. I still don’t know why you keep it hidden that you buy these things for her.”

  Andrew took the money out of his pocket. “I will give you some extra this month, so she can get some more paper as well. Maybe buy her a few frames.” Mrs. Palmer nodded taking the money from him.

  He put on his hat and looked at Mrs. Palmer. “Painting makes her happy. And for some reason that I can’t explain, that makes me happy.”

  Chapter 24

  A few weeks later, the air grew colder than Amelia thought possible. The northern climate combined with the sea air made the outdoors almost unbearable at times. She kept baby Robert wrapped in blankets near the fire most of the day. Her meals consisted of hot soups or teas trying to stay warm. Amelia spent most of her time painting in the attic when she wasn’t playing with Robert. Mrs. Palmer arranged a small workspace for her to indulge in her favorite activity. Her drawings were mostly of snow-capped mountains or raging seas. Her art distracted her from her loneliness as she looked out the small window into the whiteness of the snow.

  “Mrs. Baird, you must come at once. It’s baby Robert.”

  Amelia dropped her paintbrush and ran down the attic stairs.

  “Forgive me for scaring you, he is well. We just noticed that he is blowing bubbles.” Mrs. Palmer covered her mouth with the back of her hand as she laughed. “I think he scared himself.”

  Amelia let the relief fill her veins. As she came further into the room, she saw Mrs. Franklin lying with him on the blanket next to the fire.

  “Oh, Mrs. Baird. Please watch him when I lay him on his stomach.”

  Amelia attentively watched as Robert pushed bubbles out of his mouth. He widened his little eyes at his newfound ability. Amelia’s heart melted as she went and picked him up. “Look at you, my big boy.”

  The three women laughed together as they played with Robert on the floor.

  Amelia’s heart ached a bit at not being able to share this with Andrew. But she quickly pushed thoughts of him out of her mind. She needed to accept her role as a sole provider for her son. After all, many widows could provide a proper upbringing for their children when their fathers were not there to help. Why should she be any different? Andrew was not dead, but had made his choice to leave. She would not beg him to change his mind.

  A few more weeks passed and some of the bitter chilly air subsided. Amelia took small walks outside during the afternoon’s trying not to go mad indoors. She wished she could ride in the countryside, but didn’t want to push her luck with the stable staff. One day on her way back to the house, she noticed a lone horse with a black carriage. Not recognizing the marking, she went through the front door to inquire about their guest.

  Mrs. Palmer approached her and whispered. “You have a guest, Mrs. Baird. She didn’t state her business but said she had an important matter to discuss with you and would wait in the drawing room. I put her in there and shut the door not to alert the guards. We don’t want loose lips speaking to Mr. Baird.” She winked at Amelia who smiled back.

  She opened the door and was surprised to see Judith. “Amelia, I am so happy to see you. Forgive me for not coming sooner. We took a trip abroad, and your return letters came without my knowledge. We came back few weeks ago, but with the severe weather, I have not been able to come. I wanted to bring them to you posthaste.”

  Amelia looked down at the letters. Two were marked over three months ago and one was two weeks ago. “I don’t know what to say. I had lost hope. Thank you so much!”

  Judith smiled and sat back down. “I know you said you were not allowed visitors, but with the awful weather I was afraid I would not catch you outdoors and hoped to take my chances.”

  She took a drink of tea that Mrs. Palmer had served. “If anyone asks, I am also part of the city society and call upon wealthy residence for charitable donations. We have plenty of opportunities to give to the less fortunate. Perhaps you and your husband would like to be part of our small group?” She smiled and winked.

  Amelia winked back. “My husband is out of town. However, when he arrives, I will ask him to donate.”

  She put down her teacup as her smile faded. “How are you, Amelia? I must admit that I have thought about you a lot since we last met. My husband warned me to stay away. I don’t think it’s fair to judge you by your husband. Some women have no choice who they marry.”

  Amelia’s heart burned at the chance to have a friend—one that Andrew didn’t know and have an influence upon. “I am well and had a beautiful baby boy who is resting upstairs. I do understand your husband’s concern, but to be fair my husband and I live separate lives. We barely see each other and do not share the same friends.”

  Judith studied her face. “That must be a remarkable story and once you trust me more, I hope you will tell me. For now, I must go. However, I will be back to see about my donation.” She smiled as she put on her bonnet and cloak.

  Amelia nodded her head. “Of course. I will let me husband know. He likes to appear to be a generous businessman. A donation would help in that pursuit.”

  Judith put her hand on Amelia’s shoulder and squeezed it reassuringly before bidding her a good day with a promise to return soon.

  Amelia went to her chamber as Robert was sleeping. She locked the chamber door and pulled out the letters as she lay on her bed.

  The first letter was from Rachel dated four months ago.

  My Dearest Friend,

  It’s been so long since I last spoke to you. I have sent a few letters that were returned to me. I went and saw your stepmother who didn’t have a clue as to your well-being. She put on a nice show with tea and pleasantries, but I saw right through her. I was very relieved to get your letter and to learn a way to keep in contact with you. I should have known that you would be unable to communicate with me freely once you married that man.

  There is nothing to forgive, my friend. I can’t imagine making the sacrifices that you have made. Please know you will always have a friend in me.

  Sincerely,

  Rachel

  The next one was from Sally dated three months ago.

  Dear Amelia,

  I told you Billy was a sweet-talker. He should not have left you in that carriage alone. I have not spoken to him since I told him about you marrying that Scottish fellow and moving to Edinburgh. He was mad when I told him where you were. If I hear from him, I will write you again. Chuck said Billy was looking for your mother—not sure if he found her or not. Be careful who you trust, Amelia.

  Your friend,

  Sally

  Amelia ripped open the last one dated six weeks ago.

  Dear Amelia,

  We saw Billy yesterday. He came into town with a few new guys he met in York. He said you had left him. He came back to the carriage and you were gone. He said he had no choice but to leave with the money he got from your ring because your husband had many people trying to kill him. He said your husband is ruthless with lots of money. Does he hurt you, Amelia?

  Billy told Chuck that he did find your mother and she is in a traveling show. She changed her name to Mary Brady and will be in Edinburgh on March 17th for the show called Blue Birds. Billy said he might try to make it to the show since you’re locked away. If he can, he will tell her how to find you.

  Your Friend,

  Sally

  Amelia clutched the letter to her chest. Her mother would be in Edinburgh, and her name was Mary Brady. Tears formed in her eyes at the prospect of seeing her mother. The date was a few days away, and tough decisions had to be made. She did not trust Billy to speak to her mother despite what he told Sally. This was her one chance to find out for herself if her mother was alive and find out why she left her that fateful day. Was she forced to give her up? Did she try to find her?

&
nbsp; A knock on the door interrupted her thoughts. Mrs. Franklin came in and saw Amelia crying. “Mrs. Baird, what is the matter?”

  She tried to hide the letters under her skirt and wiped away her tears. “I am well. Just a bit melancholy I suppose.”

  Mrs. Franklin bit her bottom lip unsure if she should pry. “Mrs. Baird, was it the visitor that came to see you this morning? I helped keep the guards at bay. If you want to talk about it, I promise I am a good listener.”

  Amelia’s shoulders shook as she put her face into her hands. “It was about my mother.”

  Mrs. Franklin tilted her head. “I am not sure I understand?”

  Amelia took a deep breath. “I was told when I was a little girl that my mother died. But servants whispered that my mother had left my father in the middle of the night.” Amelia wiped her face with her hands fidgeting with the blanket on the bed. Mrs. Franklin handed her a handkerchief.

  “Do you think she is alive?” Mrs. Franklin sat beside her on the bed.

  “I hardly know. When I was a little, I dreamed of her coming for me—especially when I moved to London to live with my father. He was cruel and indifferent at the same time. He assured me she had died and was buried in France, so I was unable to visit her gravesite. I believed him for a while but always hoped it was a mistake and that she would come for me. I imagined that she would tell me that my father kept her away from me. All he told me was that they were married briefly and she died. He married my stepmother shortly afterward. I don’t think that is true. He must have threatened my mother to stay away from me. I want her to know that it is safe now that I am grown. We can be together.”

  Mrs. Franklin pressed her lips together. “What about your husband?”