Hard to Resist

by Shanora Williams

  I look up at Nolan briefly then down at the whipped cream that is now melting on my milkshake. I reach to wrap my hand around my glass but Nolan’s hand stops me from moving any further. He places his on top of mine, grips it lightly, and I look up. His smile is humble and beautiful as it graces his lips. While softening his eyes, he studies every feature of my face. “Let’s go for a walk on the beach. Get some fresh air. I’m sure that will open you up a bit.”

  I nod because taking in the beach breeze at this intense moment sounds fantastic. I could use a walk, considering the fact that my legs are crossed tightly to avoid any more dampness within my panties. “Sure,” I breathe before pulling my hand away from his.

  Chapter Nine

  I gulp the night air down as I meet the shore. My eyes shut briefly as I let the breeze push my hair back. It feels nice. Everything about beach weather makes me happy which is a part of the reason why I decided to move here with Harper. I love it at night especially because it’s never too hot or too cool. This is one thing that I won’t let Bryson ruin.

  Bryson always used to take me on beach trips. Sometimes he would do it for occasion and sometimes he would do it just for the hell of it. Myrtle Beach was only a few hours away from us so that’s where we mainly went. He would have a few older friends rent a hotel for us, gather a bunch of bottles of liquor, and then we would drink until we felt completely out of it. Going to the beach drunk at night was the best. At night, no one would be around and it would be completely dark unless the moon had decided to be close. Those beach nights were amazing to me. It sucks that that memory has to be trashed as well.

  “What are you thinking?” a soft voice murmurs to me from behind. Nolan steps to my side with his fingers tucked in his front pockets. His shoes are slightly buried within the sand.

  “My past,” I say softly. Somehow that response just slipped out. I suppose I could give into Nolan just a little. Just enough to the point where I can get some things off of my chest.

  “What about it?” he asks.

  My head lowers as I let out a soft laugh. “Believe it or not, when I come to beaches this late at night I think way too much.”

  “There’s nothing wrong with thinking too much. I do the same thing.”

  I look up at him but he’s already looking down at me. “Why do you do it?”

  Sighing, his eyes move from me to the massive body of water ahead. “I think about my past a lot, too. I think about my mom, my dad, my brother. My ex . . .” His voice lowers as he says his last sentence.

  “Your ex?” I frown and now I want him to look me in the eye. “Why your ex?”

  “Same reason why you think about yours.” I cringe. “The memories,” he adds.

  I tear my gaze away, refusing to look at him now. Is it really that obvious that I think about Bryson constantly? It can’t be that obvious. “What do you think of when you think about your ex?” I ask, turning to look at him slowly.

  “About how much I can’t stand her guts. About how bad she’d hurt me. About how dumb I was to believe that she had actually loved me.” Nolan’s features fall as he pulls one of his hands out of his pockets to rake his fingers through his hair.

  “Oh,” I mumble. “I’m um . . . I’m sorry.” My eyes soften naturally. I feel terrible for Nolan. But if he’s heartbroken and still thinks about his ex, why does he want to get to know me so badly? “So if you feel that way, why do you want to go on a date with me again? What makes you think that I wouldn’t do the same thing?”

  This time he turns to look at me. He presses in, thinning the gap that’s between us. Reaching a hand up, he caresses my cheek gently. His touch is soft, caring. It causes the hairs of my spine to prick. My eyes shut briefly, actually admiring his touch. It isn’t too long before his other hand wraps around my waist to pull me in and seal the gap completely. My eyelids fly open and I look up into his eyes. His grey eyes are still gentle as he plays with the hairs behind my ear. My chest molds with his and my heartbeat thuds against my rib cage quickly as his lips inch in closer.

  “I’ve wanted to kiss you again since the first night that I’d met you,” he murmurs as the heat of his lips grow nearer.

  “Why?” I ask softly.

  “That first kiss was amazing,” he breathes. I smile and my cheeks spark. “Everything about you amazes me. What drew me in the most was your stand-offish personality. I could see the hurt within you—I could feel it—but I tried to ignore it.”

  “I’m sorry for throwing myself at you,” I say with a shake of my head. It’s the first thing to come to mind. I’ve been thinking about how immature I was since last night.

  His laughter is silent but causes his shoulders to shake. “Don’t apologize. I was actually kind of glad that you did. But I have one question,” he says.

  “What?”

  His head lowers and his lips are less than an inch away now. Although they aren’t touching mine, I can feel them. I want to kiss him so damn bad. I want to drown with his lips and have him hold me as we kiss on the sand. I deserve to be held by someone that actually seems interested in me. “Can I kiss you again?”

  He smiles and my head bobs up and down quickly before I wrap my arms around his neck and reel him in. I groan as his full lips press against mine. I swear they feel amazing. Right now, he could win an award for Best-Kisser. The only person that I can compare his lips to are Bryson’s but Bryson has nothing on the way that Nolan is kissing me right now. Nolan has a need, a want that I want to take advantage of at this very moment.

  Nolan pulls his lips away to pick me up in his arms. He rushes toward the parking lot that is a few steps away but I’m so dazed that I refuse to fight it. Placing me on the hood of his car, he parts my legs and then maneuvers his way between them. Laying me down, he begins to plant kisses on my neck. I groan as I clutch his firm forearms. The heat is spiraling; my panties are beyond damp right now. It’s amazing how I don’t even have to be drunk or in a stupor to want to go through with this. I want him to slide his way into me while pinning my arms above my head. I want him to go for hours and suffocate me with the hardness of his body. I want him to take advantage of every part of me. This is pure lust but this lust is truly hard to control.

  Nolan’s lips trail down to the curve of my white blouse but just as he is about to reach my breasts, he pulls away and just like the night that I’d first met him, I frown. Why does he always do that? Why does he always stop when he knows that I’m going to go crazy if we don’t go through with this?

  “Go on a real date with me please, Natalie.” His husky voice makes my legs tighten around him. His hands are firmly planted on the hood of his car above me. His grey eyes are soft and glistening as he stares down at me. I observe his full lips, his broad chest, and his dark hair that barely touches his forehead. He truly does look good right now. We could go for hours if he would just shut up about going on a date and just go through with this.

  “Fine,” I snap. I reel him back in but he pauses. He pecks my lips twice, looks into my eyes, and then pulls away.

  “I always thought it was the men that were the horndogs,” he says as he tugs his shirt down and adjusts his jeans.

  “Are you kidding me?” My eyes thin into slits. “I’m practically giving myself to you but somehow you always find a way to stop. What is wrong with you?”

  He chuckles as he shakes his head.

  “Are you gay?” I ask in another snap.

  That catches his attention. His eyes meet mine again as they harden. He glares at me and I spot his jaw tick way too many times to count. Then, grabbing me by the ankle, he slides me down the hood of his car. Good thing I have jeans on otherwise the slide would have been a little rough. Nolan picks me up in his arms again then sets me down in front of the passenger door. The gap closes between us and then he crushes his lips against mine.

  A moan escapes my lips as the passion within his body burns through me. He picks me up by my waist but his lips don’t bother to pull away from mine
. His tongue lodges into my mouth quickly as I wrap my legs around his waist and my back presses against the passenger window. Damn he is really good with his lips. Something hard presses between the middle of my legs but when I realize what it is, I can’t help but to feel even more turned on. My panties are drenched entirely. I may have to get rid of these.

  Nolan finally pulls away but before he does completely, his teeth sink into my lower lip and he tugs at it. I moan again before he pulls away to place my feet back on the ground. I’m surprised that I can actually stand right now. That kiss was fucking amazing.

  “Still think I’m gay?” he asks, his lips hinting at a sneer.

  I press my lips together and pull them in to unnoticeably savor the taste of him. Chuckling, he digs in his front pocket to pull his keys out. “Come on. I know you’re hungry. What do you say we go back to your place and make sandwiches?”

  “Sure,” I manage to breathe. How can I breathe? He’s sucked all of the breath right out of me. I step back so Nolan can open my door then climb in before he shuts it behind me.

  Right now, all I can think is damn.

  That was . . . mind-blowing. Bryson doesn’t even kiss like that. Nolan must be a pro in this department. He’s testing my limits, seeing how far I will go. He knows I will go all the way so what in the hell is he waiting for? Why is he trying to hold off? I’m practically begging for him to bang me.

  As he climbs in the car, his lips are still graced with a gentle smile. He starts the car, turns the headlights on, and then pulls out of the parking lot.

  “I don’t understand you,” I say with a shake of my head.

  “What do you mean?” He turns to look at me briefly before his eyes meet the road again.

  “You’ve had two chances to have sex with me but you didn’t take them. You’ll make out with me but that’s as far as you’ll go. Why?”

  A small chuckle is his answer.

  I frown. “Are you a virgin?”

  “Far from that, Natalie.”

  “Then what is it?” I snap. He really has me frustrated, both sexually and mentally.

  “I don’t want to be on the list of your regrets. I want to be the good guy. What can I say?” he shrugs, smirking.

  “I wouldn’t regret you, though.”

  “Are you sure about that?” he asks as we approach a red light. He turns to look at me, pulls in me in, and then kisses me. My legs quiver as he sucks my bottom lip then dips his tongue into my mouth again.

  “This part of you will only last for so long. I want to go on a real date and learn more about you. You can learn more about me as well. If you agree and things go well, then we can talk sex but until then, I will only continue to tease you. That’s how people get hurt. When they rush into the sex.”

  “Why? I don’t get it.”

  “Because I want more with you.” His eyes darken just a bit, causing me to shudder only slightly. “Natalie,” he breathes, taking his clipped tone down to a murmur as he reaches to cup my cheek. “We’ve both been hurt before. Do you really think I’m that inconsiderate to want to put anyone through the pain that I’ve felt? There’s something here for you. I told you this. As you sit beside me, as I speak with you, as you breathe, I know that this can go far. Please. Just one date.”

  I groan as his eyes plead for him. “Fine.”

  He smiles. “I hope you’re actually doing this to get to know me and not just for my dick,” he quips.

  My cheeks flush but two can play at this. “Maybe I want both.”

  Nolan lets out an obnoxious laugh and somehow it causes me to laugh as well. He has a contagious laugh. I’ve never heard him like that before. It’s actually adorable. “Once I really know you, then I can really get to know her,” he says as his eyes travel south. The light flashes green and he presses the gas but I squirm as another flood of warmth destroys my panties.

  Chapter Ten

  As soon as we arrive at the condo, it’s pitch black inside. I flip the switch of the living room on and the spotlights above Harper’s brown leather sofa’s cascade and brighten it a bit.

  “Cool place,” Nolan says from behind me. Sighing, I place my wallet on the glass coffee table. I then turn to face him but he’s now less than an inch away from me. Does he not realize how close he is? “Are we here alone?” he asks, raising a smooth eyebrow.

  My breath hitches as he stares down into my eyes. My eyes lock with his quickly and I try to get myself to look away but I can’t. His are beautiful, garnished with long, butterfly eyelashes that seem to touch his masculine cheekbones every time that he looks down. My gaze travels down to his perfect nose, his full lips, and then his broad chest. The height of him is the biggest turn on. He towers over me and I love the feeling. It always feels as if I’m being protected.

  “We are,” I say as I finally look away. “But nothing is going to happen so get your mind out of the gutter.”

  “Hey.” He lifts his hands as if he’s surrendering. “I’m just asking. You’re the one staring holes right through me.”

  I bite back on a smile. “You were staring, too.”

  “I’ll admit that I was. Who wouldn’t stare at you?” He steps in again but I take a step back as I shake my head.

  “So, turkey or ham?”

  “I’d prefer Natalie on my sandwich,” he murmurs. My skin tingles gently. He looks me over, scans me with wide, grey eyes. “Ham,” he finally says through a chuckle. “Come on, Natalie. Take a breather. I’m just kidding around with you. You don’t have to be so tense.”

  “I’m not tense,” I argue. I truly have a bad habit of making myself sound so immature—especially when I’m dealing with Nolan. He brings out the kid in me which is good at times but right now, it isn’t and that’s mainly because he gets a kick out of my reactions.

  Still grinning, he says, “Okay.”

  Spinning around, I make my way towards my bedroom. “Let me just change into something else,” I call over my shoulder.

  “Sure thing.”

  I trot off to my room feeling the urge to just slam my door behind me. But I don’t. I hate the fact that he’s making me feel this way. I hate the fact that my horniness has made me agree to go on a date with him. I know very well that a date is not what I need. It’s only been a month and if I fall into his sticky web, I may get caught up and hurt once again. I don’t like the feeling of being hurt. I don’t want the remains of my heart to be evaporated. Bryson has already caused enough damage. I definitely don’t need anymore.

  Nolan says he’s been hurt, but I’m sure that he’s hurt plenty of girls as well. He said on the first night that we’d met that he picks up lots of women from the clubs. How does he feel after he’s fucked them? What does he do if they want more from him? Does he just ditch them and never speak to them again? I’m sure he refuses to give them anything more than his penis.

  So that only leaves me with one mind-boggling question: What does he want with me?

  To be honest, I can’t even compare to the other girls of Miami. They’re beautiful and well-tanned. I love the beach but I don’t look like I belong on one. I don’t have that perfect beach body or the perfect wavy hair. I don’t lie around to get tan and toasty on my front lawn. I’m not like Harper where she can wear skin tight clothes and get away with it. I’m practically average.

  As I pull my shirt over my head, I hear footsteps making their way towards my room. I turn around quickly to the sound of the creaking door only to spot Nolan leaning against the frame with his arms crossed. I fold my arms over my chest immediately while scowling at him.

  “What in the hell are you doing? Get out!”

  He smirks and right now I want to smack that beautiful smile off of his face. “I wanted to tell you that there’s no bread to make the sandwiches,” he says.

  My eyes narrow. “You couldn’t have waited until I was dressed?”

  “Not really. I sort of missed you.” His grin causes my heart to double in speed.

  “A bit
clingy, aren’t we?”

  “I’ll be as clingy as I have to be if it means that I will get to see you like this every time.” His eyes scan over me deliciously.

  “Nolan, please just get out. It’s not really comfortable to change with you just standing there.”

  Nolan’s smile fades but his eyes don’t drift from mine. While unfolding his arms, he walks towards me quickly. His body presses against mine and we land on my bed with a loud flop. He stares into my eyes for a brief moment and before I can ask him what the hell he’s doing, he presses his lips against mine. His tongue slips into my mouth and out of habit I braid my fingers through his hair.

  I don’t think I will ever understand why he insists on making out with me but not going through with anything. I want him to just fuck me already. At least if we do it, I might not have to worry about him anymore. It’s like he’s trying to purposely make me sexually frustrated.

  His hands touch me gently from my face to my shoulders and then down to my chest. One of his hands cup around my black bra and I groan as I wrap my legs around him to pull him in closer. He sucks on my bottom lip before letting go and kissing me again. I swear I love when he does that. I feel the warmth and wetness building up within me. We literally could go for hours if he would just let it happen.

  He finally pulls away and we both pant uncontrollably. “I want you to get comfortable with me,” he says against my lips.