Cashmere and Camo

by Erin Nicholas

  She blew out a short breath and then climbed the steps to the front door. She didn’t want to admit that she was a dating failure—on date one no less—but she was pretty sure the people in her house were expecting this outcome anyway.

  She stepped into the dining room a minute later. “Hey, guys.”

  Ava and Cori turned quickly, their eyes wide and curious, then they both, almost in unison, tamped their excitement down.

  “Hey, you’re just in time for the refills,” Cori said. She gestured at the table where they were playing Settlers of Catan.

  Cori had long ago taken it upon herself to make game nights into Events. With a capital E. There was always a theme and it tied the game and the snacks together. It was clear that she’d taken the “island” theme from Settlers and extended it to the food. There was coconut shrimp, mango salsa, and pina coladas.

  Brynn wasn’t going to point out that Catan was not a tropical island. She was sure Cori had figured that out by now—they were well into the game—and it didn’t matter anyway. It was all just for fun.

  She could let things go and just have fun.

  Probably.

  Besides, people didn’t like being corrected. Tonight with Sean had given her further proof. But honestly, he couldn’t be standing up in front of a classroom of sophomores and teaching them that there were only five senses and totally ignoring the other four proven senses. Sixteen-year-olds could understand and appreciate proprioception. Surely.

  At least his refusal to admit that the science curriculum in most public schools was lacking, and the fact that he’d never even so much as written one of his Senators about better science funding made it easier for her to not want to go out with him again.

  “I could definitely use a drink,” Brynn told Cori, hooking the strap of her purse of the chair at the end of the table. She dropped into the chair with a sigh.

  Cori rose and filled a glass for her, complete with a paper umbrella and an orange twisty straw.

  After Brynn had taken a long drink, she looked around the table. Everyone was watching her and no one was saying anything. Her sisters both looked ready to bust, Evan and Parker looked mildly amused, and Noah—she met his eyes last—looked like he was nearly grinding his back teeth off.

  “What?” she asked.

  “Seriously?” Cori asked. “How was it?”

  Brynn stirred her straw through the white cocktail. “It was…” She took a breath. “Terrible.”

  Out of the corner of her eye, she saw Noah visibly tense.

  “What?” Cori asked, leaning in. “Terrible? How was it terrible?”

  “I just…” Brynn shrugged. “It was awkward. We were talking about the only thing we have in common, but then we got into a debate about how important skepticism is in science and it basically devolved from there.”

  Cori snorted softly. “Isn’t debate an important part of scientific discovery and research?”

  “Sure.” Brynn rolled her eyes. “We just didn’t hit it off. Oh, but at least I did manage to convince him to tutor Mandie Marshall.”

  “Why does Mandie Marshall need a tutor?” Ava asked.

  Mandie was twenty-eight and going back to college. She came in to study in the pie shop twice a week. “I noticed the she was really stressed out one day and that she was studying biology. I gave her a little help, but chemistry is my specialty. She came to mind tonight while Sean and I were talking about teaching theory. I mentioned it to him and he said to tell her to call him.”

  Ava looked impressed. “And isn’t Mandie single too?”

  Brynn shook her head. “I didn’t bring it up as a setup.”

  “Still,” Ava said with a shrug.

  “Anyway,” Brynn said. “Once I realized that there was no way he was going to kiss me at the end of the date, I decided to skip dessert and have him bring me home.”

  Noah made a choking sound and Brynn looked over at him. He was scowling at the game board, not even looking at her.

  Evan laughed though. “It was all pointless if you weren’t going to get kissed?”

  She looked over at him. “I have several people I can talk science with any time of any day. I do not, however, have people I can kiss any time of any day. So, yeah, if I’m going to sit through a lame discussion about the former, I feel like I should at least have the latter to look forward to.”

  “Ah, right.” Evan shot an amused glance at Noah who was gripping his pina colada glass tightly and still not looking at her.

  “I could have been sitting here tonight, having a lot more fun with people I really like and a lot better food if that’s all this was going to be.”

  “So you think the point of dating is kissing?” Parker asked.

  She shook her head. “Not just that. I mean, not exactly that. But isn’t that what’s supposed to set guys, or girls, you date apart from the guys, or girls, you’re just friends with?” she asked, unable to keep from emphasizing the word she and Noah had used over and over. “It’s how Ava is different for you from me and Cori, right?”

  Parker looked at Ava and a soft smile curled his lips. “Yeah, I guess that’s true.”

  Brynn sat back in her chair and crossed her arms. “I dressed up, I did my hair, I put in my contacts. And I went out and dealt with mushy cheese balls and annoying conversation—I mean, I didn’t even say anything when he first started talking about how he’s teaching about electromagnetic fields, I just let that go—and then I didn’t even get kissed! What a waste.”

  Evan gave a choking sound as if he was swallowing laughter.

  “Evan,” Cori said warningly. But she was fighting a smile too.

  Brynn rolled her eyes. “I’m just saying that kissing is supposed to be a perk, right? I mean, you put up with a bad joke or two, or mushy cheese balls, because in the end, the kissing will be good.”

  “Man, I’ve had some mushy-cheese-ball kisses for sure,” Ava said. “I think you’re putting way too high of expectations on this.”

  Brynn slumped down further in her chair. That wasn’t what she wanted to hear. She wanted to be kissing. She wanted to try all of this guy-girl stuff out. All of it. Bliss was kind of a controlled environment. She knew the guys were going to have similar backgrounds and lifestyles. So she could compare them to one another a lot more easily than she could the guys in New York. She hadn’t dated since high school and if she was going to do it now, then she wanted the full experience. She wanted to go back to New York with all of her experiments done and some actual data to work from. And her working hypothesis was that kissing could be fun. And could make the nerves and the talking worth it.

  “Yeah, I didn’t realize you were thinking a lot about kissing,” Cori said. “Or that you were thinking about that at all.”

  “I wasn’t totally,” Brynn said, honestly. She’d been focused more on just quelling the butterflies in her stomach and trying to not think about the fact that she hadn’t even been able to successfully socialize with her own father. “Until I was halfway through the appetizers.”

  Cori snorted at that. “That wasn’t very far in.”

  Brynn just shrugged.

  The cheeseballs had sucked, and she had realized there had to be some payoff for everything she was putting into the date. So she’d started thinking about how the guys she was going to go out with would be different from Evan and Parker and the guys she knew in New York. The scientists and researchers that had never seen her as more than a brilliant mind.

  The kissing was about it.

  Yes, she knew that having men appreciating her for her brain rather than her boobs was a nice twist. But she was an identical triplet. Her sisters were gorgeous. Brynn was…okay. It was proof positive that personality had a lot to do with looks. But Ava and Cori were each high maintenance in their own ways. Ava more in the shoes-and-highlights way. The way she carried and presented herself as the CEO of Carmichael had been important. Cori more in the always-on-the-go-ready-for-adventure way. Cori was fun and daring.
Which, frankly, made Brynn tired just thinking about it.

  Her defining quality was her IQ and sinking into books, and the school laboratory that other students avoided as much as possible had made it easy to avoid challenges like bossing people around or being the life of the party. Being quietly, stoically nerdy had served her well, and she’d leaned hard on that differentiation from her sisters.

  Brynn sighed. “It’s just that I could have better company and food at home. The only thing the date gives me that I can’t get here is the kissing.”

  Noah suddenly shoved his chair back and stood. “I need to go.”

  Brynn looked up at him. Go? Her heart knocked against her ribs and she felt her eyes widen. He looked…not angry exactly. But not happy.

  “Where are you going?” Parker asked, clearly surprised.

  “Something I have to do.” Noah started for the front of the house.

  Without thinking, Brynn scraped her chair back and went after him. “I’ll be right back,” she tossed over her shoulder.

  Noah was already out the door and down the porch steps by the time she got outside. “Hey!” He didn’t slow down. “Noah!” She ran down the steps and the front path. “Noah!”

  He came to a sudden stop and she almost plowed into him. She came up short just in time. He swung to face her, his expression stormy.

  “Are you okay?” she asked.

  “No, Brynn, I’m not okay.” He gave a short, humorless laugh. “I’m really not okay.”

  “Why? What’s wrong?”

  He shoved a hand through his hair. “I can’t sit and listen to you talk about kissing other guys, okay?”

  She paused. She had no idea how to read the emotion in his eyes. “I didn’t kiss him.”

  “You wanted to.”

  “Well, yeah. Kind of. But…not him. Not exactly.” Did he not like Sean? Was he jealous? Her chest felt a little tighter at that thought.

  “It doesn’t matter.” He shook his head. “I can’t listen to you talk about other guys at all.”

  “Even the bad dates?”

  He ran a hand over his jaw. “Apparently not.” He shook his head. “I thought I knew how I’d feel about this dating thing.”

  Her eyes widened. “How did you think you’d feel?”

  He finally met her eyes directly. Intently. “I thought I wanted the dates to suck,” he said bluntly. “I didn’t want you to have any fun with any of the guys. I wanted them to be one and done.”

  “Oh.” She had no idea what else to say.

  “And he didn’t kiss you because I told him not to. What I didn’t tell him was to be sure that you had an amazing time. I guess I need to make that clear in the future.”

  She blinked at him. “Oh.” Then she frowned. “That’s…”

  “A dick move,” he filled in. “But I don’t care.” He shrugged. “I really don’t. Even if you think I’m overstepping. Even if you think it’s none of my business. I don’t care. I will be sure these guys treat you right. I have to.”

  Her frowned deepened. “You have to?” There was something about the way he’d said it that made her pause. He was her friend. She was sure that Evan and Parker would want to be sure the guys she dated treated her well too. But there was something in Noah’s eyes that made it seem like more than that.

  Noah squared his stance and tucked his hands in his back pockets, clearly bracing for a fight. “I promised your dad. I told him I’d make sure everything he put on his list happened. The pie shop has to be profitable, you and your sisters have to get your relationships back on track, you have to date six guys, and you have to go back to New York happier and more confident than when you left. It’s all working. But you have to get through these six dates yet and then you have to go back to New York. I have to be sure those dates go well and you get out of them what you need, but that there’s nothing more there. So, I’m not sending you out on these dates without making my expectations really clear.”

  Brynn knew she was staring at him. But that was probably the most words Noah had ever said to her at one time. For one thing. The words themselves also took her off guard. “He actually told you all of that?”

  “He did.” Noah had a stubborn set to his jaw. “I will not let your dad down, Brynn.”

  Her eyes widened. The intensity in Noah’s tone was not something she’d heard before.

  “You’re doing this because my dad asked you to. Not just because he put it in the trust, but literally asked you to?” she asked to clarify.

  “Yes.”

  “What did he say exactly?” She wasn’t sure why she felt defensive, but she definitely felt tension climbing her spine.

  “Take care of her and send her back to New York happier and more confident. I want her better after being in Bliss.”

  Yeah, that was why she was feeling defensive.

  Better. Implying that she wasn’t as good as she could be before coming to Bliss.

  The thing was, Rudy hadn’t really known her so how could he know how she needed to be “better”? He thought she was an introvert. That was true. But he also thought she was shy and weird. Because that’s what she’d let him see. And maybe it was a little weird to not want to be close to your father. But, well, then she was weird. But Rudy didn’t know how to fix her. She was going along with all of this will stuff for her sisters. At first it had been because of the money, but now it was because Bliss and Evan and Parker and the pie shop really were good for them. But she was fine. Which everyone would know if they ever, just once, asked her. But it was only for six more months. Then she could go back to New York and do her own thing and not worry about going along with things for everyone else’s benefit.

  She took a breath. “And here I was thinking I was pretty good to start with.”

  Noah sighed, as if this wasn’t going as planned at all.

  She knew the feeling.

  “You are,” he said. “But Rudy wanted—” Noah shrugged. “More for you.”

  Rudy’s version of more anyway. “So you’re basically stepping into the role of my dad since he’s not here to do it.”

  He clenched his jaw, but then slowly nodded. “Yeah. Something like that.”

  Okay, ew. He didn’t have to agree with her on that.

  “And for six months it’s been easy,” Noah went on. “Get the pie shop running, help you settle in. But now…” He pulled in a deep breath. “Now I have to not only sit by while you date other guys, but it’s clear that I’ll have to set you up on these dates.”

  That was not what she’d been expecting. “You’re going to set me up on the dates?”

  He nodded, his mouth in a grim line. “I was hoping I wouldn’t have to. But obviously, Cori and Ava didn’t do a good job.”

  She couldn’t argue with that. Though her sisters had had the best intentions. “Hey, Sean’s the right age, lives here, teaches science. That seemed like a good fit on paper.”

  Noah scoffed. “Sean is also about as romantic as that light pole,” he said nodding to the pole near the street.

  “You would set me up with guys who were romantic?” That didn’t sound bad. But it also didn’t sound like Noah was feeling jealous or worried about these dates. She frowned.

  “Brynn—” He blew out a breath. “You deserve to be adored. Romanced. Treated like a princess.”

  She blinked at him. “I do?”

  He gave her a small smile. “You’ve been in your sisters’ shadows for so long. You deserve the attention now. You deserve to spend some time with men who are with you because of you, not because you’re one of the Carmichael triplets, or because Cori dragged you to a club and made you dance, or because you just made some big scientific breakthrough. You need to go out with regular guys who don’t know shit about protons and neutrons and who have no idea what Carmichael Enterprises is and who haven’t been doing tequila shots with your sister. Guys who just think you’re beautiful and interesting and want to get to know you better.”

  Brynn knew her ey
es were wide but she couldn’t help it. How did he know that’s how it all usually went down? “But I’ll be spending time with men who are there because you told them to take me out.”

  His expression hardened. “I’ll be finally giving them permission to take you out.”

  Yeah, that sounded a little dad-like. “Oh, really?”

  “You haven’t been asked out at all since you’ve been here.”

  “No.”

  “Do you really think that’s because no one wants to ask you out?”

  “You have been scaring them off?”

  He lifted a shoulder, not looking a bit apologetic. “Not directly.”

  “But they haven’t asked because of you.”

  “Yes.”

  Nope, not one ounce of apology in his tone or expression. Brynn crossed her arms. This was clearly important to him, so she’d do it. If he needed to feel like he was doing something good for her, and for her dad, she’d go along with it. But he wasn’t her dad. And her real dad hadn’t been all that protective. “My sisters don’t keep me in the shadows. I stay there on purpose.”

  “I know.” He looked at her with a mix of affection and exasperation. “They actually try to bring you out.”

  She nodded.

  He wasn’t done though. “But you stay in the shadows because then there’s more spotlight for them.”

  Brynn felt her mouth open, but no words came out.

  “And you stay quiet and shy because Ava and Cori like to encourage you and build you up and take you out. Like on game night when you let your sisters let you win.”

  She sucked in a quick breath. “I…” But she didn’t know how to finish that.

  “It’s like when you let Hank and Walter and the guys give you advice. That you don’t need. You just smile and nod. It makes them feel good to help you, so you let them.”

  “It doesn’t hurt to let them talk.”

  “As long as you don’t have to talk, right?”

  She couldn’t deny it.

  “Your tendency to just stay under the radar and let everyone around you do whatever they needed to do started when you were young. With Rudy,” Noah said. “You realized that he couldn’t handle all three of you. Barely individually, but definitely not all together. So you tried to be easy. Quiet. Not needing any attention.” Noah took a step closer to her. “And when you were older, you realized that your dad didn’t really understand you. That you baffled him and made him a little uncomfortable. He could talk business with Ava and at least argue with Cori, but he didn’t know what to do with you. So you played up being a super genius nerd so he could tell himself that you were too brilliant, too out of his league, and he’d be off the hook for not being able to relate to you or bond with you.”