Promised Passion: A Wolf's Choice (Heart's Desires Book 3)

by Noah Harris

  Dante nodded. “I feel the same way.”

  “Yeah? I was worried you would think I was treating you like some sort of dirty secret or something,” Liam admitted.

  Dante frowned at him. “Really? Wouldn’t it make more sense for you to feel like the dirty secret?”

  “Yeah, but I am the dirty secret. Don’t give me that look. You know it’s true. I knew what it was going to be when we decided to go through with all of this,” Liam said.

  Dante shook his head. “You’re not a dirty secret.”

  “What else would you call this?” Liam asked quietly.

  Dante hesitated. “I…I don’t know what to call this. I just know I’m enjoying my time with you, more than I’ve enjoyed anything else before. Maybe it’s just the Joining playing with my head and emotions, but…I don’t think it’s just that. I just know for sure, that I love being with you. If I think too much ahead of that thought, I feel my brain go into panic mode, lockdown, and I end up useless.”

  Liam smiled sadly at him. “One day at a time, huh?”

  Somehow that reliable philosophy felt shallow and hollow now. “Yeah, one day at a time.”

  Chapter Fourteen

  Whereas it had felt like time was moving at a leisurely pace when Noah first arrived, it wasn’t feeling like that anymore. The closer the unofficial date got for Dante leaving the sept with Noah, it felt as if the clocks were intentionally speeding ahead. As much as Dante had tried to keep his mind focused steadily on the present, he could feel himself losing the battle. Every passing hour was one that brought him closer to the date of his long ago arranged departure.

  He didn’t want to leave, but he didn’t know how he could pull that off without destroying the peace between septs. As much as he wanted to believe in the security of the peace between them, there was enough doubt in his mind to make him hesitate. It was very possible the peace could break apart if he were to do something he felt was ultimately selfish. Could he really live with himself if the alliance between their septs hinged entirely on his being mated to Noah, and he was the one who shattered it like the first freeze of winter?

  Every day was an unreal balancing act between spending his days with Noah and then his nights with Liam. Under the light of the sun, he was the perfectly dutiful heir to a distinguished pack, readying himself to fulfill his obligations. When the moon rose, however, he cast off that illusion and spent those secret hours with Liam. He was torn, between his responsibility to his sept and friends, and being true to himself and as a result, to the will of Gaia herself.

  When he needed peace of mind, he took his midnight walks through the woods. When he needed answers, or even some form of wisdom, he sought out Rosa. He’d been working himself up to talking to her over the course of a few days, trying to work out the right words in his mind whenever he had a spare moment. To him, he felt it was inevitable that she would figure something out, at least enough for her to hunt him down and get the facts out of him. What he needed was her help, and he preferred to catch her when she wasn’t already riled up.

  It didn’t stop him from hesitating at her cabin door for almost a half hour, however. He’d managed to free up some time during his evening before he was due to meet with Liam and every moment he spent on Rosa’s front step was a moment less he would have with him. Whatever he was going to do, he knew his time with Liam was the only thing that was keeping him sane. It was also one of the reasons he was so stressed, but at least there was something so amazing and beautiful to enjoy in the mess he was creating.

  Shaking himself, he raised his hand to knock on the door, resolving himself to actually knock this time. Before his knuckles could make contact with the hard surface, his arm faltered at the mental picture of Rosa’s face when Dante tried to explain what was happening. The frown, the look of annoyance, and worst of all, disappointment that he could picture clearly on her features brought his arm back to his side.

  He had hardly begun to chide himself for his cowardice when the door swung wide open. It was so sudden Dante yelped and almost jumped off the small set of steps. Pinwheeling his arms, he grabbed hold of the doorframe to steady himself. Rosa stood before him, holding the door open with an exasperated expression on her face.

  “You gonna come in here and tell me what’s eating you, or do you plan on worrying my steps down to a nub first?” she asked, blunt as ever.

  Dante smiled weakly. “How long have you known I was out here?”

  She stepped out of his way, allowing him in. “I saw you walk up ages ago. Been waiting for you to get the courage to knock on that door ever since.”

  “And you would have been waiting a while longer,” Dante admitted with a sigh.

  “Yeah, figured that one out for myself. Get your butt in here, sit down and I’ll make us some tea,” she told him.

  Dante hustled into the house, not wanting to argue with her. The familiar smell of her cooking bubbled out of a pot on the stove, mixing with the wood smoke and the wildflowers growing in a hanging basket beside the window. Rosa moved past him, busying herself with pulling out a kettle and rummaging around for her small collection of tea leaves. She glanced at him as he slowly sat in the comfortable folds of a kitchen chair, worrying his bottom lip unconsciously.

  Rosa hummed, ending it with a grunt. “Alright, we’ll forget the tea. I can tell we’re gonna need something else for this conversation.”

  She reached up, opening a top cabinet and pulling out a medium-sized bottle. The craftsmanship on the bottle alone told Dante it was no standard container. The glass, or perhaps crystal, had been molded so it looked as if it were frozen waves on a lake’s surface. The liquid inside only emphasized that impression, being a frosty blue color that caught the light as it sloshed around.

  “Do I dare ask?” Dante asked, eyeing the bottle warily.

  “You can, but that don’t mean I’m going to tell you,” she told him as she brought out a set of small cups, pouring a measure of the liquor into each.

  Dante accepted his cup, sniffing it carefully. It was definitely liquor, but he couldn’t identify what kind of liquor it was, other than a strong kind. Before he could second-guess the decision, he tipped the contents into his mouth and swallowed. The flavor was sweet, with the delicious tartness of some sort of fruit he couldn’t identify. The liquor slid smoothly down his throat, erupting into what felt like a ball of fire when it finally hit his stomach.

  He winced, shaking his head as he pulled the cup away to squint at it. “Good Gaia, what is this?”

  Rosa took her drink and downed it entirely, with more grace than Dante had. “A gift. I’ve had this locked away for years now. Only pulled it out on a few occasions in my life. I don’t even know where to find it again, since my mate was the one who found it for me. This here liquor is for when something really good happens, or something really bad. Last time I drank from that bottle was shortly after I started taking care of you.”

  He wanted to make a joke about his ability to drive her to drink, but just smiled instead. “The night I told you why I went on my walks?”

  She shook her head. “No, that’d be the third time you went out and I followed you.”

  Dante sat back. “You followed me?”

  She scoffed. “You bet your ass I followed you. Young boy goes wandering off by himself at night, so of course I did. Figured you just needed the illusion of privacy, not the actual privacy itself. That is until I came across you crying your eyes out at the foot of a tree. That’s when I realized you weren’t the one who was wrong, but me. Wasn’t right that it was the only time you could mourn, but it was when you decided to do it. Never followed you again after that.”

  “I never once thought anyone saw me,” Dante told her quietly.

  “And I hadn’t planned on telling you, but I’m getting the feeling you need to be reminded that I love you, difficult child that you’ve been at times. Also felt like you should know you don’t have to suffer alone anymore,” she said.

  He n
odded, fingering his cup nervously. “I appreciate that, and I know you’re there for me, no matter what. That doesn’t mean what I came here for is easy to talk about.”

  Rosa tipped the bottle, adding more of the liquor to Dante’s cup. “And that’s why I brought this out. I got the feeling that what you’re coming to me with ain’t good news. Or maybe it is, I don’t know. Call it a mother’s intuition.”

  Dante chuckled. “I always just called it you being psychic.”

  “Whatever you want to call it, it’s talking to me now. Problem is, you should be the one talking,” she said pointedly.

  He took a deep breath, shaking his head slowly. “I don’t even know where to start.”

  “I’m told the very beginning is usually a good place to start any story,” she replied dryly.

  Snorting, he took another drink, shaking his head again. “And people wonder where I get my mouth from.”

  “This have to do with Noah? Or does this have to do with that boy Liam?” she asked, not accepting his obvious attempts at evasion.

  Dante winced. “Both?”

  Rosa sighed. “Is that a question or an answer?”

  “Both?” Dante tried again.

  “Dante, you ain’t never had a problem telling me when something was bothering you. At least, not when you finally decided to come to me with it, so why now?” she asked with a frown.

  “Because I’ve never had a situation where something I’m doing or could do would potentially affect the entire sept,” Dante replied.

  She paused at that, understanding crossing her face. “So, you are involved with that boy, aren’t you?”

  Dante sighed. “You knew.”

  “Not at first, but I started wondering if there was something there after I found you with him. You weren’t doing anything that gave you away, so get that look off your face. Or at least, you weren’t doing anything that would have given you away to anyone but me…and probably Erik. It was a more a feeling, something in the air,” she explained with a shrug.

  Dante nodded. “Yeah, we’re…involved.”

  She toyed with her cup. “And since you’re here, worrying about it, I guess that means it isn’t just good sex you’re having with him.”

  If only it were that simple. A casual, sexual relationship between him and Liam wouldn’t catch anyone’s attention. In truth, even being in a sort of relationship with Liam couldn’t have more of a consequence than people simply frowning on it. Dante was, by the laws of their people, a free agent, and could date and sleep with whoever he pleased. The problem was that it was expected, required even, that he would become Noah’s mate. He couldn’t be mates with both men, and for him to choose another over Noah would be an insult to the accord signed between their septs years ago. Even worse, choosing Liam over Noah would be seen as choosing someone lesser, an even greater insult to Noah, his pack, and subsequently, their sept.

  “It’s…so much more than just good sex,” Dante told her finally.

  “I should already know the answer to this from the way you’re acting right now, but how much more is ‘much more’ Dante?” she asked.

  Dante took a deep breath and started from the beginning, analyzing his feelings from the first time he’d seen Liam. “I don’t know how much of it was there from the beginning, but I’m betting quite a lot. Even before the first time, I could sense something between us. I missed sensing it the night Noah arrived, but it was definitely there the night you came across us talking on the beach. I didn’t know it then, but I was drawn to him, pulled to him. It wasn’t until later, when we finally touched that I realized what it was.”

  “So, you slept with this boy and now suddenly you’re crazy in love with him?” she asked, looking almost confused.

  Dante gave her a sad smile. “I didn’t sleep with him until just the other night. No, it was when I touched him. All I did was take his hand, and it was done.”

  It only took a second for her eyes to widen in understanding. “You don’t mean…”

  Dante nodded. “I tried denying it after it happened, and even Liam tried to fight it after that first time. Once I got more information though, I knew I couldn’t ignore it anymore.”

  She poured herself another drink. “And that’s why you were asking me about the Joining when you came here that morning. I should have known then something was up. I guess you’re getting old enough now that you’re able to get some things past me.”

  “I guess I can take some comfort in that,” Dante said with a light laugh.

  She pointed at him. “Don’t go getting any smart ideas. I said some things, not a lot of things. Now, you’re telling me you felt the Joining with this boy?”

  Dante nodded again. “It’s exactly how you told me it would be. When I touch Noah, it’s like…well, there’s nothing there, just skin-on-skin contact. When Liam touches me, it doesn’t matter if it’s just holding my hand or something more, I feel like I’ve been half-asleep for years and only just woke up. When he’s around, everything that’s ever been wrong in my life is suddenly okay, and everything that’s good is even better. I meet with him every night, and it’s the best part of the day for me. Everything else is just window dressing compared to the full show that meeting him feels like.”

  Rosa’s cup hovered at her lips as he brow rose slowly. “I…don’t think I’ve ever heard you talk about someone else like this before.”

  Dante shrugged helplessly. “I haven’t felt like this about anyone else before. I started off barely knowing the guy, and now I can hardly stand being away from him. Every time we’re around one another, we’re always learning something new. Everything I learn is just the most fascinating thing I’ve ever heard in my life. I can’t stop being around him. I don’t know how. Even sitting here, talking about him with you makes me wish he were here with me.”

  Rosa eyed her cup, considered it for a moment, then tipped the contents into her mouth. “Well, that certainly sounds exactly like a True Bond to me.”

  “Well yeah, that was kind of the point of me telling you. I already figured that much out,” Dante told her with a huff.

  She waved her hand at him in annoyance. “Now, don’t start with that attitude, I was just confirming what you said. Fact of the matter is, only people who’ve felt the Joining can say whether or not they went through it. I can tell you up and down, from dawn to dusk, that you went through it with that boy, but it won’t matter one bit without you knowing it too. We got that bit covered, but now I gotta ask: what are you going to do?”

  Dante shifted the cup on the table uneasily. “That’s kind of what I’m doing here. I don’t know what to do, Rosa. I can’t stand to be away from Liam for more than half a day, let alone move miles away and never see him again. But if I don’t do that, then everything the sept tried to do to make peace with Noah’s sept will have been for nothing.”

  “Trapped between the needs of your heart and your duty?” Rosa asked.

  Dante nodded. “That’s exactly what was going through my head while I was standing on your front step. I don’t know what to do.”

  Rosa’s mouth twisted, grimacing as if she didn’t like the taste of her upcoming words. “You’ll have to talk to Noah.”

  Dante blinked. “What? Why would I do that?”

  “The man is a highly decorated and respected member of his sept. His pack is well-known for their valor in battle and for being honorable. If there was ever a golden boy in that sept, it would be Noah. If you don’t want to go with him, then it’s him you need to talk to. Whatever he decides, his pack will follow, and I bet you his sept will go along with whatever he says too,” Rosa told him.

  “Yeah, but that would require me telling Noah I don’t want to go through with our deal, and risk insulting him,” Dante pointed out.

  “True, but I imagine it would be better than him finding out by accident. Have you seen anything to indicate he would react horribly to that?” Rosa asked.

  Dante didn’t answer immediately, trying
to give the question some thought. It was true Noah had come here, and would expect Dante to return with him, just as both of their septs expected it. It was also true that sometimes Dante wondered if Noah wanted it as little as Dante himself did. The problem was, they were both doing their duty, Dante out of lifelong expectation, and Noah, perhaps simply because he was an honorable man.

  “Well, no, but I also don’t know him that well,” Dante admitted finally.

  “Sounds to me like you’re going to have to figure it out, and soon. I wasn’t kidding when I said that a True Bond is for life. Good or bad, you and Liam are bonded to one another for the rest of your lives, and maybe the next one if some of the stories are to be believed. I can’t give you the answer to your problem, because it’s gotta be one you figure out for yourself. But what I can tell you is, this isn’t going to go away. You’re going to spend the rest of your life wanting to be with Liam, and he with you. If it doesn’t come out now, it will further down the road, somehow, some way. You need to figure something out and fast, otherwise it will spiral out of your control,” Rosa warned him.

  “That doesn’t really get me anywhere,” Dante said, his shoulders slumped.

  “This is between you and Liam, but a lot of the decision rests on your shoulders. It may not seem nice and it’s certainly not helpful, but it’s the truth. You have to be the one to figure this out. I wish I could help you Dante, but the best I can tell you is that whatever you decide, I’ll be supporting you the whole way through,” Rosa assured him.

  Dante looked up. “Yeah?”

  Rosa reached across the table, grabbing hold of Dante’s hand fiercely. “Dante, I’m going to say this only once for you, so listen. I’ve never wanted you to be sold off to some other sept like some painting to be put on display. You’re too bright and wild to be strapped down like that, but I didn’t say anything because it was, in the end, your decision to make. But this is where you’re going to make a real decision, and I want you to make it. For the first time you have the chance to really have a say in what happens to your life, to escape what a bunch of men decided for you ages ago.