Eraserheads

by Brick

  “And still, it was Boots who ended him. Boots who ended that Chandler dude too. Meanwhile, both those niggas sold you up shit creek too.”

  “I was going after Chandler. Boots just got to him before I did.”

  “My point exactly,” she said, with such smugness I was tempted to stop the truck and put her ass out on the side of the road.

  I would see how far that pretty face and sassy attitude would get her in the middle of Augusta.

  I didn’t say what I wanted to say to her. Just kept quiet so as not to do something or say some shit I would regret.

  But she kept going. “So you can stop putting the blame all on Code now and take your share of the responsibility too. You let your team down just as much as she did. You quote Bruce Lee all the time but didn’t take the method to his madness to heart. You took a Martin Luther King Jr. approach when you should have taken a Malcolm X position. By any means necessary, you protect those you fucking love, Auto. Any fucking means necessary, even if that means having to sit down with the enemy as you plot his fucking demise.

  “Fear not the man who has practiced ten thousand kicks, Auto. Fear the man who has practiced one kick ten thousand times. Isn’t that what Bruce Lee said? Some shit like that? Notice that the stiffest tree is most easily cracked, while the bamboo or willow survives by bending with the wind. He said some shit like that too. So, see, you may have become like water, but you forgot to bend like the bamboo and the willow. You forgot to fucking bend with the wind, which is why you cracked, easily.”

  I swerved the truck to the side of the road. Hopped out, then swiftly walked around to the other side of the truck. I saw her reach over and pick up something before I pulled the passenger-side door open, then snatched her out.

  “I told you to shut the fuck up!” I barked at her.

  “And you mad because I’m telling you the truth,” she retorted.

  She tried to snatch herself away from me, but I shoved her back against the truck. I expected her to come back swinging, but she simply caught her balance and folded her right arm, which was in a sling, across her chest.

  “How about this truth? You can find your own way back to Morrow. How about that hot shit since you know so much?” I shouted.

  “I don’t give a shit. I can survive anywhere you put me. Toss me to the wolves and watch me come back, leading the pack. So fuck you too, Auto.”

  I didn’t even pay attention to her words as I hopped back in the truck, tossed her backpack out the window to her, and then pulled off.

  “You know we can’t leave her out there like that. As pissed at Code as we might all be, we don’t want her gunning for us about her fam,” Stitch told me.

  I’d been so heated, I’d forgot he was in the backseat, honestly.

  “Yeah, well, let’s see how far that fucking mouth gets her now,” I snapped.

  I looked in my rearview mirror. She was tossing her backpack over her left shoulder. The shorts she had on displayed her toned brown thighs and lush backside, along with the tattoo running down her thigh. The Braves T-shirt covered the bruises on her torso, which I’d noticed while helping her to clean her scrapes and bruises from the jump over the staircase railing when the guns started spraying. Combat boots added definition to her calves.

  “Well, shit. We ain’t gone make it that far ourselves,” Stitch observed.

  I glanced at Stitch in the mirror. He still had that sullen, downcast look about him, only now there was a light humor in his eyes.

  “Why you say that?”

  “Because she got the proximity key to the truck. So as soon as you turn this motherfucker off, we stuck too.”

  “Ah, shit.”

  Stitch gave a head nod, then went back to staring out the window. I should have known she had one-upped me just by how calm she had been. The truck had a “push to start” engine, so without the proximity key, I had pretty much fucked myself while trying to fuck her. I sighed, whipped the truck around, and drove back in the direction I’d left her. She was still there waiting, with a look of triumph on her face. Neither of us said a word as she hopped back in the truck and closed the door.

  “Can I get my key back?” I asked her.

  “Bend with the wind, Auto. I bend with the wind,” was all she said.

  She didn’t give me the key back until we got back to Clayton County, though.

  * * *

  Two days later, after Dunkin had been cremated and his ashes carried to the Caribbean by his grandma, after Seymore’s mother had all but told us we weren’t welcome at his funeral, we laid Lelo to rest. I had never been a fan of funerals. I could never get used to the fascination people had with wanting to see their loved ones’ lifeless bodies being put into the ground. All the tears and bereavement unnerved me.

  “Code is here,” Reagan said.

  There was no emotion in her voice. Only the tears in her eyes alerted you to her pain. The weather was bright, and sunshine was dancing across the sky. Birds chirped in the sky as we all gathered at Sherwood Memorial Cemetery to say good-bye to Lelo. It didn’t seem like a good day for a funeral, but as Carmen said, that was Lelo’s way of telling us not to weep for him.

  Afterward, as people left the burial site to head to their cars, Stitch and Carmen stayed seated with their children by Lelo’s side. His daughters had been dressed in all white, while his sons had donned all black. Carmen wore white like her daughters; and Stitch, black like his sons. They sat there like they didn’t want to let go.

  Reagan and I stood close by to lend our support. Reagan pointed suddenly, and I turned in the direction she was indicating and saw Code. She was dressed incognito. Blended in with the rest of the mourners in all black. She saw us looking at her. We all knew there would be no way she wouldn’t show up to at least one of the funerals.

  No matter what, we had all been family. Still, as Code walked toward us, Reagan walked off in the opposite direction. She wasn’t ready to forgive, and no matter what Smiley had thought and said, neither was I. I watched as Code walked over to Carmen and Stitch. Carmen may not have been a part of our operation, but she knew what had gone down, because Stitch had told her after I’d told him. So it didn’t surprise me when she damn near slapped spit from Code and then stormed off. The kids trailed after her. Stitch stood up to follow his girl and kids, then stopped short.

  He turned to face Code. “You could have told us what we were up against, you know? Even when you merely suspected it and didn’t know for sure, you could have said something. You left us open, Code. Showed that in the end, your loyalty lay with your real family, right?”

  For as long as I’d known Code, I’d never seen her in as much pain as she was now. As she looked at Stitch, judging by the way she swallowed hard, I could tell she was trying to find the right words.

  “I fucked up, Stitch. I know I did, and I know nothing can bring him back, but had I any idea of what was about to go down, I would have warned—”

  Stitch shifted his weight from one foot to the other, then shook his head. “But you did. You did have an idea of what was about to go down. You know your old man better than anybody. Why? Because he’s family, right? But what about us? What about my family now? We functioned as a team. Me, Carmen, Lelo, and our children. What were you waiting on?” he said through his tears.

  “I had to make sure,” Code answer, trying to defend herself.

  Stitch seemed to lose patience and yelled, “Why? Why did you have to make sure? You know what this motherfucker is capable of, Code. So, why? Why play Russian roulette with our lives, huh?”

  “I didn’t know at first, Stitch. I didn’t.”

  “Bullshit. I keep thinking about . . . thinking back to that night out at Joy Lake, when that Mouse motherfucker looked at you and said he couldn’t tell who had paid him. The look on your face, in hindsight, said it all. You knew. Had ample time to warn us about the possibilities, but what did you do?”

  Code’s only answer was her silence.

  Stitch
shrugged. “Yeah. That’s what I thought,” was all he said before he turned and walked away.

  While Code stood there, drowning in her own demons, I had one last thing to add to all Stitch had said.

  “This is where we end our friendship, Code. We can no longer go on as if shit is the same. Your family is the enemy of my family now.”

  Smiley’s words were haunting me. It was as much my fault as it was Code’s that my family had been put into harm’s way. I couldn’t fault her without faulting myself. We had been a team. We had led this team together, and I, too, had let the team members down. Left them open to hell on earth because I didn’t want to become what I feared. I didn’t want to become that monster I needed to be in order to survive.

  With those words, I turned to walk away from a woman I had once seen as my sister. I sent Smiley a text message and told her I was on my way back to my place. I was sure she had been the one to tell Code about the funeral, since Code hadn’t been seen or heard from in days. I had to keep in mind that Code and Smiley were family. Still, I had no doubt where Smiley’s loyalties lay. She had no interest in being in cahoots with the old man, but she did care for her cousin Code. That was the only thing I’d have to be careful of.

  “Auto, let me help. You can’t go against Papa alone. He’s not an ordinary opponent. He has too many resources at his disposal, and he will eat you alive. So please, let me help,” Code said behind me.

  I shook my head. “Nah. See, I got a few resources up my sleeve too. So, the only way you can help me is to stay out of my way. I’d hate to have to kill you in the melee, Code, but that doesn’t mean that I won’t. The enemy of my enemy is my friend. A friend of mine once left me with sage words, which I will now live by more than ever. Every nigga gotta agenda, Code. And I now know mine.”