Just for the Summer

by Fay Keenan

  ‘I’m a painter and decorator, by the way,’ she said suddenly. ‘If you need someone to sort out that damp stain and give the walls a lick of something new, I’m going to be around for a few weeks this summer. I’d be happy to quote for the job.’

  Harry looked surprised. ‘Well, er, thank you,’ he said. ‘I’m not quite sure what my plans are yet, but I’ll certainly keep that in mind if I do decide to, er, touch the place up.’

  ‘Great.’ Kate swiftly left the bookshop. As she came back out into the light of the sunny High Street, she kicked herself a little. Had she sounded too critical by pointing out that this man’s shop needed redecorating? She had to work hard to be tactful, at times; she’d always had her mother’s very direct, no-nonsense nature, but over the years she’d learned to temper it. Unfortunately, being the mother of three growing boys had eroded much of her learned diplomacy; perhaps she needed to think about her approach with people a little more now she was rebuilding her life after her divorce.

  14

  After passing a pleasant half hour engrossed in the book she’d bought and a latte, Kate headed down the High Street and back to the first coat of paint on Aidan and Tom’s living room. Nearing the row of terraced houses that was currently home, she felt again the pleasure of knowing that both of her brothers were happy and settled now. It had been a touch and go few years for them all. When Aidan had been injured in Helmand Province, his life had changed irrevocably. Years of physical and psychological therapy had created a new normal for him, and now he was in a settled, long-term relationship with Tom, the final piece of the puzzle seemed to have fallen into place. As she approached Bay Tree Terrace, she saw Florence was coming out of the front door of number two.

  ‘Hey,’ Kate called out when she reached their adjacent garden paths. ‘How are you doing?’

  Florence looked blank for a moment, and then, much to Kate’s shock and concern, she burst into tears. Hurrying to Florence’s side, she put an arm around her. ‘What’s wrong?’ Rummaging in her jeans pocket, she pulled out a tissue. ‘Don’t worry, it was fresh this morning.’

  ‘Thanks.’ Florence blew her nose noisily and allowed Kate to lead her to the front door of number one. Slipping the key in the lock, Kate hurried Florence through to the kitchen and sat her down on one of the spindle-backed wooden chairs while she filled the kettle and flipped the switch.

  ‘Whatever’s the matter?’ Kate asked as she sat down in the nearest chair, waiting for the kettle to boil.

  Florence shook her head. ‘It’s stupid, really, just hormones.’

  Kate smiled. ‘Tell me. I’ve had three babies. There’s not a lot I didn’t go through when I was pregnant with the boys.’ And for quite a while afterwards, she added silently. Grabbing another tissue from the box on the kitchen table, she then just decided to pass Florence the whole box. Pregnancy tears were usually fat, wet and required whole loo rolls to mop them up.

  Taking a deep breath, Florence looked up at Kate and smiled. ‘It’s all so stupid, really, and I’m ashamed of myself for breaking down like this. It’s just… what if this baby comes and I don’t know what to do with it? What if it doesn’t like me? What if I don’t like it? I’ve seen so many kids over the years who’ve been irreparably damaged by their parents, sometimes even from before they were even born. What makes me think I’m going to do any better?’ She put her head in her hands again.

  Kate reached out and put a gentle arm around Florence’s heaving shoulders and let her cry for a few more moments. When her sobs had subsided a little, she gave Florence’s shoulders a little squeeze.

  ‘I promise you, every parent in the world goes through this kind of thing at least once,’ she said gently. ‘And, being a teacher, I bet seeing the whole spectrum of children doesn’t help at all.’

  Florence sniffed. ‘That’s exactly what my friend, Josie, said the last time I started having a meltdown.’

  ‘Well, she’s right,’ Kate said. ‘We all go through it, and we all come out the other side. This childbirth thing is probably one of the hardest things you will go through, but you’ll get there; you will get through it. And you’ll have Sam by your side when you do. I know how much he loves you, and anyone can see how excited he is about this baby. I’ve never seen him like this over anything before. He’s always been so reserved, so private about everything; but with you, and now the baby, he’s finally starting to open up.’

  ‘What was he like, you know, when he was younger?’ Florence asked. ‘He doesn’t really say a lot about his childhood.’

  Kate grinned. ‘Well, I wish I could tell you he was different, but in reality, he was just shorter. He was always such a reserved kid, and navy life only enhanced that ability to be self-reliant.’ She paused and smiled at Florence again. ‘If it’s any consolation, our dad was exactly the same. In the end, Mum just gave up trying to get him to open up to her – but she isn’t exactly demonstrative, either.’

  ‘It’s a wonder you all turned out so well,’ Florence said, then blushed. ‘Sorry, that’s a bit rude, isn’t it?’

  Kate grinned broadly. ‘You’re family now – you’re allowed to criticise your in-laws!’ She paused, and a thoughtful expression came over her face. ‘Don’t get me wrong, Florence, we always felt looked after as kids, but Mum and Dad were both pretty emotionally remote. That kind of thing is difficult to shake after a lifetime.’ She stood up, remembering that she had put the kettle on to boil for tea. ‘Seeing Sam with you now, it’s a revelation for me. He’s so much more open, so much more affectionate than he’s ever been. When he knew you loved him, it was more than just about him and you; my relationship with him seemed to get better, closer, somehow, too. I have a lot to thank you for.’

  Florence smiled back. ‘That’s really lovely to know. And, for the record, I’ve loved being welcomed into the family – with Mum and Dad up north still, and my brother in Australia, it’s nice to have Aidan next door, and now you.’

  Kate brought over two mugs of tea and set them down on the table. Feeling the need to remind Florence of a time when she perhaps felt a little less emotional turmoil, she reminisced a little on the wedding that they’d had.

  ‘I remember walking down Willowbury High Street and wondering just what the hell you’d both got yourselves into!’ she said. ‘It being the summer, do you remember the amount of bunting there was outside the shops? And the smell of incense was overwhelming. The church had more flowers outside than I’ve ever seen in my life, and I remember that eccentric pagan couple who kept handing out posies to every guest as they went through the gates. They weren’t anything to do with the official wedding party, were they?’

  ‘Nope,’ Florence replied. ‘The vicar told me that they were likely to rock up to spread their blessings and goodwill, as they do for every wedding in the town’s church, and not to be alarmed by them. They mean well.’

  ‘Yes, but then contrast that with Sam’s ex-Navy mates doing the guard of honour, and your teacher friends all throwing confetti made from the pages of vintage romance novels and I think it was probably the most memorable wedding I’ve ever been to, and I count my own in that, too!’

  Florence laughed. ‘Teachers are the biggest troublemakers at parties. We have to keep so buttoned up in our day to day lives that we just cut loose whenever we get the excuse. My friend, Josie, especially. How she made it home after the reception, I’ve no idea. Even three days afterwards she was recovering from an excess of Prosecco!’

  ‘I know the feeling,’ Kate said. She remembered, to this day, the thumping headache she’d woken up with the morning after, and how Corey, Tom and Will had dragged her up Willowbury Hill to ‘blow away the cobwebs’. She also distinctly remembered throwing up behind an elderflower bush when the boys had gone on ahead, and swearing off Prosecco for life. That, like her marriage, was an oath that had gone by the wayside, she thought ruefully.

  ‘I hadn’t imagined I’d fall pregnant so quickly,’ Florence said. ‘Not that I’m complaining
,’ she added hastily. ‘Plenty of people I know end up trying for years. It just all feels as though it’s happening really fast now. One day I’m taking a test and the next I’m about to stop work.’ She shook her head. ‘And I’ve worked full-time since I qualified out of university. How am I going to cope with the change of pace?’

  ‘I’m not going to lie; it’ll probably freak you out,’ Kate said. ‘And it will take you a while to get used to all of the changes. But I promise you, Florence, you will cope. There will be good days and bad days, but you’ll get through them. And you’ll have loads of people around to help you through the trickier times. Sam, especially.’

  Florence blew her nose noisily. ‘Thanks, Kate. I know it’s just the hormones getting to me, but it all feels so huge at the moment.’ She glanced down at her baby bump. ‘As am I.’

  ‘You look fabulous,’ Kate said, and she wasn’t just saying it to make Florence feel better. Despite the puffy eyes and the tears, pregnancy really did suit her.

  ‘Thank you.’ Florence gave a brighter smile. ‘All these worries must seem so daft to you, when you’ve been through it three times.’

  ‘Not at all,’ Kate said, taking a sip of her tea. ‘I carried all three of my boys differently, but with all of them the worry was there that I wouldn’t take to them. Especially after the miscarriage I had between Will and Tom.’ She shook her head. ‘I was so worried after that, that even when Tom got past the twelve-week mark I couldn’t relax. Poor Phil had his work cut out, night after night, trying to keep me calm.’

  ‘I’m sorry,’ Florence said, ‘I didn’t mean to remind you of a difficult time.’

  Kate shook her head. ‘It’s fine, honestly. This divorce wasn’t just because he found someone else – the marriage was over long before Jennifer came on the scene. We just couldn’t admit to it.’

  ‘You seem very reasonable about it all,’ Florence said in surprise. ‘Doesn’t it hurt?’

  ‘Of course,’ Kate said. ‘But I had to do a lot of soul-searching when the bomb dropped. Phil and I had been together since school; there’d never been anyone else for us. When things started to wane, and all we had left in common was the kids, it was kind of inevitable that one of us would end it. He met Jennifer and he couldn’t help it; I can’t blame him for that.’

  ‘And the boys? How are they about it all?’

  ‘Confused at first, and obviously the end was a wrench for everyone. But the thing about having undemonstrative parents is that you don’t approach things with all guns blazing. Mum and Dad taught me to hold back, to keep my emotions wrapped up and deal with things pragmatically. Some people might call that cold, but for me, in the end, it was self-preservation. Phil cried when he left our family home for the last time; but I couldn’t.’ Kate shrugged. ‘We all put the walls up to protect ourselves, I guess.’

  Florence sipped her tea thoughtfully. ‘So, what next?’

  ‘Find a house, move in, try to get this decorating business off the ground,’ Kate said. ‘No point dragging my feet about it. Plenty of people want a woman for a decorating job, and I think I’m good at it. Work shouldn’t be hard to find, if people are willing to take the risk on a new venture.’

  ‘Especially if you take some shots of what you end up doing with this place,’ Florence said. ‘I mean, getting that wallpaper off was impressive enough!’

  Kate grimaced. ‘I can still feel the stuff under my fingernails, it was so thick!’ She glanced at the clock on the back wall behind Florence, which Florence immediately noticed.

  ‘Sorry, I should let you get on.’ Rising slightly awkwardly from the chair, she made to walk out of the kitchen.

  ‘I’ll see you in a couple of hours next door, anyway,’ Kate said. ‘Sam said you’ve got some flat-packed nursery furniture for me to have a crack at.’

  ‘It would be great if you could help,’ Florence said. ‘Sam was going to do it, but there’s no telling when he’ll be back tonight.’

  ‘I’ll pop round when I’ve got the first coat on the living room walls,’ Kate said, walking Florence back to the front door. She paused for a moment, uncertain whether or not she should reach out and hug Florence again. That was another consequence of having a natural, ingrained reserve cultivated by years of emotionally distant parenting, she thought; you just never know when a hug is the right thing to do. Even having had three children of her own, whom she hugged ferociously and regularly, as often as she could get away with, she still felt unsure about the etiquette of hugging outside her own immediate family. Settling in the end for a quick squeeze of Florence’s arm, she bade her goodbye.

  As Kate headed back towards the living room and the trestle table she’d set up with her paint pots, trays, rollers and brushes, she thought again about the change in her brother, Sam, since he’d met Florence. Perhaps love really does give people the chance to embrace new things, she thought. Maybe, despite years of habit with Phil, she too might find someone who’d awaken her own hopes and desires again.

  15

  After a good morning’s painting, where she began, finally, to see what the room was going to look like once it was finished, Kate headed next door to help Florence with the nursery furniture. Florence had been told by her midwife to take things as easily as she could in the last weeks of her pregnancy. Although the midwife had stopped short of advising Florence to stop work early, she had to be mindful of that. Thankfully, by the time the summer holidays were over, she’d only have a few weeks left in the classroom before she went on leave, so she and Sam were confident she’d make it through.

  In a couple of hours, the nursery furniture had been assembled to their mutual satisfaction, and just as they were sliding the changing table into place against one wall of what was to be the nursery, they heard the front door opening and Sam calling a cheery greeting up the stairs.

  ‘We’re up here,’ Kate called down. ‘Your timing, as ever, is perfect. We’ve literally just put in the last screw!’

  Sam poked his head around the nursery door. ‘Lovely job, it looks great.’ He grinned. ‘How about dinner at the pub as a thank you?’

  ‘Sure,’ Kate said. ‘If you’re up to it, that is, Florence?’

  ‘Try and keep me away,’ Florence said. ‘I could do with a walk.’ Stretching out her arms to the ceiling, she grimaced and then clutched her left side between ribcage and baby bump.

  ‘You okay?’ Sam, all concern, moved towards her.

  ‘Fine,’ Florence said. ‘No one tells you about the exquisite double-edged sword that is a tiny foot in your ribs!’

  ‘Or the midnight kick to the bladder!’ Kate laughed. ‘Corey, in particular, was a real one for doing that. I don’t think I slept at all in the late stages with him.’ Suddenly overwhelmed with longing to find out how her children were getting on in Florida, she resolved to give them a call later. The pictures they’d been sending her were fantastic, but she had a yearning to hear their voices.

  As they walked down to the Travellers’ Rest pub, in the heart of Willowbury High Street, talk hopped about from new baby plans, to the horrors of Aidan and Tom’s walls, to updates on Kate’s three boys, and then, eventually, to Kate’s future. Kate still hadn’t seen anything on Rightmove that she wanted to take a closer look at, so it looked as though her mother’s annexe was going to have to be home when she returned to Cambridge, for a few months at least.

  Sam got the drinks in and they settled outside on one of the tables that looked over the High Street. It was a lovely evening, with the waning sun still casting a warm glow over the honey-coloured stonework of the pub and its neighbouring buildings, and Kate breathed in the fresh, warm air, and felt the knots of tension created both by the hard work of decorating and the thought of her sons being so far away from her slip, albeit temporarily, away from her.

  She sipped her pint of cider thoughtfully as Sam and Florence bantered amiably about babies’ names and then more thoughtfully about the cases Sam had flown that day in the air ambulance. Kate was co
ntent to let it wash over her. There’s a couple who will go the distance, she thought, although she was sure that she could remember a time when she and Phil had only had eyes for each other; when the prospect of ever being apart seemed unthinkable. How time could change things! But there was no point dwelling on that. They’d created three beautiful boys between them, after all; the marriage hadn’t been bad until the end.

  ‘You okay?’ Sam asked, obviously clocking the faraway look in Kate’s eyes.

  ‘Fine,’ Kate said, snapping back to the moment. She took another sip of her pint, and then felt her face start to flush as she realised that Harry, the man who owned the bookshop, was right in her eyeline where she was staring up the High Street. He had a satchel with him, and, glancing at her watch, she realised that he must have shut up shop for the night. She shifted a little uneasily in her seat, remembering the coffee incident, and also the forthright way she’d told him his shop looked a bit shabby so soon after she’d complimented him on his window display.

  Florence, who had a keen eye for shifts in body language, after so many years of being in the classroom, glanced at Kate curiously. ‘What’s caught your attention?’

  ‘Nothing,’ Kate muttered, feeling embarrassed to have been caught out.

  ‘Really?’ Florence raised an eyebrow and grinned as she caught sight of Harry. ‘Oh, hang on a minute…’ she trailed off tantalisingly. ‘Was he the guy you were telling me about? The one you threw coffee over?’

  ‘Yup,’ Kate confirmed. There seemed to be little point denying it, since she’d told Florence the story when they’d been putting the nursery furniture together.

  ‘Should we ask him to join us, by way of a peace offering?’ Sam teased. ‘I’m sure he wouldn’t say no to a pint, especially if you promise not to throw yours over him again!’

  ‘No!’ Kate hissed, but it was too late as Sam turned around and smiled at Harry as he reached their table. Inwardly cursing her brother’s ability to put her on the spot, she was mollified slightly when Harry caught sight of her and gave a really rather lovely smile.