Her cheeks blazed, hot with anger at herself as she kept her hand resting between Amber's thighs, on top of her diaper. As Amber shifted, Evelyn realized where her hand was, and she jerked it away like she was touching a hot stove.
"E-evelyn?" Amber finally said, breathlessly. "...What's wrong?"
"I have to go," Evelyn said abruptly, as she pushed herself off of the bed, averting her eyes from Amber's half-exposed form. "I'm sorry."
"What? Wh-what do you mean, you have to go?" Amber repeated, eyes wide with alarm. "Don't, please! We can-"
"I'm sorry," Evelyn said, sincerely, tears filling her eyes as she backed away. "I shouldn't have come here. I shouldn't have done this."
Amber would never have agreed to any of this if she knew the truth. What young woman in their right mind would have been okay with Evelyn helping them into diapers - if they knew Evelyn was a middle-aged lesbian with an adult baby fetish?
And now she'd somehow manipulated poor Amber into accepting her perverted affection. Groomed her. That was the only thing that made sense, and Evelyn hated herself for it. She'd taken something beautiful, and ruined it.
Her body shaking more and more as she stood there, Evelyn took a deep breath - then turned, and left, as quickly as she could.
The front door slammed behind her a few moments later - without even a goodbye to her 'oldest friend'.
Shedding a bitter tear, Evelyn turned on the car and drove away. She wasn't any kind of friend at all.
So no loss there, then.
Chapter 16 - Amber
Things were falling apart right before Amber's eyes. She lifted a hand, desperately, as Evelyn left, her throat too dry to even say the word 'stop!' or 'wait!' - and afraid it wouldn't have made a difference anyway.
What did she do wrong? Amber jumped as the door slammed shut, her expression a mask of woe, her heart broken. Tears didn't come yet, she was in so much shock.
It had all seemed so right, so perfect for just a moment, Evelyn's lips warm and feminine against her own, her hands exploring her body. And then she'd gotten to the diaper... And it was like all desire left her body. She could no longer bare to even touch Amber.
"Of course," Amber hissed through gritted teeth, tears welling in her eyes. "It probably just reminded her to see me as just a stupid child..."
Amber shoved Butterscotch aside, not having the heart to throw him or knock him to the floor, and threw herself backwards onto her pillow, the tears filling her eyes now. Her body still trembled with the anticipation of a release that would never come, the ghosts of Evelyn's hands touching her all over lingering long after it was appropriate.
Screwing up her eyes, Amber rolled over, and cried into her pillow.
She lay there until she fell asleep - ignoring the diaper between her legs, knowing Evelyn was repulsed by her...
***
"Amber, it's time to get up!"
Her mother's voice came up the stairs. Amber ignored it.
The diaper was gone, unused, ripped off once she woke up in a fit of grief, and balled up in the back of her closet. Amber didn't even want to think about ABDL stuff right now.
"Amber?" Hannah called again, as she began to slowly scale the stairs. "Sweetheart, school starts in-"
"I'm not going," Amber shot back, quickly. "I'm sick."
"You don't sound sick," her mother said, as she pushed open Amber's bedroom door.
Amber sniffed, her head peeking over her comforter, propped up on pillows. Her nose was bright red from crying, and her eyes were huge and watery. She stuck out her chin, defiantly, staring her mother down. There was no way in hell she was going to school today.
"Oh, Amber," Hannah said, looking like her own heart was breaking. "What's wrong?"
"Nothing," Amber snapped, looking away, blinking back more tears. "Nothing at all. I'm just sick. I'm not going in."
Hannah seemed torn. She hesitated, her thin lips twitching downwards as she looked for something to say.
Eventually she sighed, and shook her head.
"...Okay, sweetheart," Amber's mother muttered. "I hope you feel better soon. I love you."
Amber was silent.
If she didn't let herself feel anything, even love for her mother, she could pretend that Evelyn's new rejection didn't hurt like hell... But guilt gnawed at her, briefly. She couldn't punish her mother for this feeling of heartbreak.
"...Love you too," Amber eventually replied, feeling her eyes sting with tears again.
"Kiddo, are you sure you-"
"Please just leave!" Amber snapped again, her voice thick with tears.
Wincing, Hannah did exactly that, leaving Amber to cry some more and try to go back to sleep so she didn't have to be awake and feel this way any longer.
***
Amber told Kiki what had happened sometime after noon. She felt like a zombie, walking around like she was alive long after she was already dead.
Unfortunately, her stomach still worked, even if her heart didn't. She held her phone in one hand while she scanned the shelves for food. The only thing Amber could see that she could just pick up and eat was a box of frosted honey nut cheerios... So Amber slid it off the shelf, and shoved her hand in.
Amber's phone buzzed, Kiki's message popping up instantly.
PinkPunkKiki: u doin ok? got some food? :(
"I'm eating cereal right out of the bag," she messaged Kiki back, with a half-smile. "Ultimate depression meal."
A moment later, and Kiki responded again:
PinkPunkKiki: Haha :P
PinkPunkKiki: when my ex left me I ate nothing but ramen for weeks x.x
PinkPunkKiki: did u kno u can eat ramen raw? becuz u cant really.
PinkPunkKiki: but fuck if I didn't try!!! :P
Amber snorted, a small smile on her lips. Even if things were terrible, at least she still had her best friend to joke around and cheer her up... and provide emotional support.
PinkPunkKiki: srsly tho, I am worried for you. :( did she say anything b4 she left?
Amber screwed up her eyes, cringing. It was still very raw, the memory of last night playing back in her head instantly.
sadgirlamber: she just said she was sorry.
sadgirlamber: and she couldn't do this.
sadgirlamber: idk. :(
In truth, Amber still didn't really understand what had happened, or what Evelyn had meant by 'I can't'. She was left to fill in the gaps with her own imagination, and right now her imagination was tugging hard on all of her insecurities.
She and Kiki messaged back and forth for a while after that. Kiki managed to coax Amber into sending a message to her, and she waited for a response, holding her phone in her hand tightly while she kept Kiki updated.
sadgirlamber: she probably wont even respond.
sadgirlamber: ...i'm going to send another if she doesn't reply soon...
After twenty more minutes, Amber sent another message.
Thirty minutes later, and she'd sent a third, and gotten no response back.
Heart breaking all over, she sank back into her bed, knowing she'd end up sending several more before the day was over.
***
Amber's mother came home at just after 5. Now Amber's phone was kicked off of the end of the bed, pushed as far away from her as possible so she didn't have to see the blatant lack of a reply from Evelyn.
The only notifications were from Kiki, who'd offered virtual hugs when Amber said she was going to lay back down.
"Amber, are you still up here?" Hannah asked, as she peeked into Amber's room once more, gasping as she saw her laying there on top of her rumpled covers, staring at the wall. "Oh, sweetheart... You look terrible..."
"Mm," Amber responded, not moving.
"It hurts me to see you like this," Hannah said, sincerely, as she moved into the bedroom slowly. "Please, tell me what's the matter?"
That got a response. Amber's body twisted as she moved to sit up, seemingly overcome with strong, painful emotions. Her face
contorted in grief... and then she pushed the emotion away, frowning, eyes sparkling.
"...You wouldn't understand," she muttered, shoulders falling.
It was true. There was no way she could explain this to her Mom. At least Kiki understood, but she wasn't really here to hug her or talk to. Amber felt like she was completely alone in the world.
Hannah hesitated. She bit her lip. She took a breath, and then, sighed, closing her eyes.
"...This wouldn't have something to do with Evie, would it?"
Amber's face was like a deer in the headlights, looking up at her mother with complete shock. How the hell had she known?!
'Quick, say something!' Amber's brain prompted her urgently.
"What!? I... W-why on earth would you say that!" Amber spluttered, her bright red face and sudden panic immediately giving her away.
Hannah chuckled dryly, sitting down on the bed so she could be closer to her daughter.
"I'm not blind, sweetheart," she said, with a bittersweet smile as she took Amber's hand gently in hers. "I've known you and Evelyn for a long time. I could tell you were sweet on each other, even if I didn't want to believe it at first."
Amber swallowed, blinking back tears... and then began to sob. It was like her mother acknowledging it broke the dam, and suddenly all of her emotions poured out in one big flood.
Her mother hugged her close as she cried, mumbling incoherently about Evelyn, sobbing and pressing herself hard against Hannah's shoulder like she was a small child again. Everything hurt, tears pouring out of her like blood out of a wound. She felt so stupid, so hideous, and so, so pathetic.
Eventually the crying began to stop, and Hannah gently peeled Amber off of her, wiping away her tears like she had when she was very small. Amber's tiny smile returned. Again, she'd found a tiny ray of hope and support in the people who already loved her. It made this whole experience just a little more bearable.
"It's tr-true," Amber said, between hiccups and sniffs. "I love her, Mom. I love Evelyn. I don't know if I'm like, gay, or bi or a lesbian or what, but... I am... I was in love with her..."
Amber's eyes brimmed with tears as she finished talking, and Hannah wrapped her arms around her, hugging her close again, rubbing her back as she let out another fresh deluge of tears.
"Y-y-you're not m... mad?"
Hannah shook her head, her eyes closed with a kind of serene, but slightly sad peace.
"I was concerned, at first," she said, as Amber pulled back to listen, wiping her own eyes. "But... I trust Evelyn. She's a good woman, and I don't believe she would ever take advantage of you... Love is love, no matter who it's between. You're an adult now. You can love whoever you want."
Amber's smile broadened for just a second - and then it fell. Because even if that was true, it didn't matter now, did it? Evelyn was gone, and she didn't love Amber, didn't want to be with her after all.
"It, it hurts," Amber croaks, sliding a hand up to her chest. "Why did she leave?"
"What happened?"
"We were... We kissed," Amber said, blushing and looking away evasively before she continued. "...And then she just left. She said she couldn't do this, and she was sorry, and, and I haven't heard from her since."
"Did you message her?" Hannah asked, and Amber nodded sadly.
"Well, I don't know," Hannah replied, sighing. "I can't tell what's inside people's hearts. It's possible she just felt guilty about your relationship, and that was why she left. She's always been the kind of person to worry too much over problems that don't exist."
Amber felt the tiniest ember of hope flicker to life inside of her. She swallowed.
"B-but... What if she just... decided she doesn't like me any more?"
"I guess that's possible, honey, but I'd be really surprised," Hannah said, gently. "She liked you enough to kiss you. To spend so much time with you lately. I don't know what could change that, so quickly..."
Amber cringed, remembering the diapers. But she couldn't mention that to her Mom.
"...What should I do?"
"Go talk to her," Hannah said, firmly. "You'll never know what happened unless you do that."
Gulping, Amber nodded.
"I'm scared," she whispered, and Hannah nodded back, too, squeezing her hand.
"I know, honey," she said. "But it'll be okay... Come on. I'll drive you over there."
And, dressed in just her pajamas, Amber slowly shuffled out of bed, and followed her mother down the stairs to the car.
She would find out how Evelyn really felt, and why she'd left - no matter how badly it hurt.
Chapter 17 - Evelyn
Evelyn lay in bed, clothes on. She stared at the ceiling, feeling utterly hopeless.
Big tears dripped slowly down her cheeks. Evelyn ignored them, unable to make them stop. She hated herself. She deserved to feel this awful.
With a sniff, she rolled over onto her side, curling into a fetal position. The cats had been curious at first, but now they left Evelyn alone as she wallowed in self-loathing and misery, as if even they knew it was something toxic they didn't want to touch.
Evelyn's email to work saying she wasn't coming in was short and perfunctory, and Evelyn hadn't even bothered to see what the reply was. Let corporate fire her, for all she fucking cared now. Another thing she deserved.
On some level, Evelyn knew she was being ridiculous, even childish. But then, wasn't that just another way she was a shitty person?
Since Sunday evening, Amber had been messaging her again and again. It seemed like every 10 minutes her phone would buzz, and the alert would have Amber's name on it.
That poor girl. Evelyn cringed, thinking about how she'd used Amber's bedwetting as an excuse to get close to her, how she'd twisted things so she could live out her filthy, perverted fantasies. She was nothing more than a disgusting dyke who preyed on high school girls for her own sick urges.
Again, Evelyn knew that wasn't exactly the reality... but right now it felt like the reality. It felt like she didn't have a single decent bone in her body.
Evelyn felt uncleansably dirty, all over.
Her phone went off, and Evelyn groaned out loud, pulling the pillow over her head to muffle it. It buzzed over and over, as whoever was on the other end tried to call her...
No, not 'whoever'. Evelyn knew it was Amber. And that was why she had to ignore it...
As soon as the first call finished, another one started. Even in the midst of her self-hatred and grief, Evelyn had to smile at Amber's persistence, as her phone went off again and again.
Eventually, the calls ended - and Evelyn thought Amber must have finally given up.
'Good,' she thought to herself.
***
Less than ten minutes later, there was a knock at the door. Evelyn tried to ignore that as well - but then the knocking became banging, louder and louder. Afraid whoever it was would disturb her neighbors, Evelyn slithered out of bed, and headed down the stairs.
Immediately she could tell through the door that it was Hannah standing there, and she felt her blood turn to ice even as she kept walking towards it. Evelyn knew her 'best friend' must have come to tell her she hated her, maybe even attack her for taking advantage of her little girl... If that was how she felt, that was fair, Evelyn thought.
She took a deep breath through her nose, wiped the worst of the snot and tears on the back of her long-sleeved cardigan... and unlocked the door.
"I guess you spoke to Amber," Evelyn said, quietly.
"I did," Hannah said, her lips thin, expression unreadable.
"...Are you here to tell me what a disgusting person I am?" Evelyn mumbled, bleakly. "Because, I already know..."
Hannah's mouth dropped - and then she actually laughed, in shock. The harsh noise made Evelyn jump, snapping out of her melodramatic mood slightly, realizing how foolish what she'd just said sounded.
"Don't be ridiculous," Hannah said, shaking her head. "We've been friends for a long time, and we're going to be friends
for a long time yet, I hope."
"Then... why did you come?" Evelyn said, the tiniest ember of hope stirring in her heart.
"Because Amber wants to talk to you," Hannah replied. "And I wanted to see you first - because I hoped you'd open the door to me, even if you wouldn't for her."
Evelyn looked away, darkly. God... God... did she want to talk to Amber? Of course she did... but did she deserve to?
While she was thinking, the decision was made for her. Hannah had beckoned to where her car was parked, and Amber, her own eyes bloodshot and tearful, had begun walking up the bath towards them. Evelyn stiffened as she saw her, heart racing with panic as she once again felt like the situation wasn't under her control.
"Let's go inside," Hannah said, and without even thinking, Evelyn moved aside, letting both of them into the hall.
Her legs moved her on auto-pilot, walking her towards the living room. Evie didn't dare to look at Amber, not sure what feelings that would stir inside her, terrified of her reaction while Hannah was there.
Silence, again, as they stood awkwardly in the middle of the room. Lala watched them lazily from the couch, head turned strangely as her tail swished slowly back and forth. Evelyn watched her - she was a good distraction, for the moment.
"...Okay, I'm going to leave now," Hannah finally said. "You two need to discuss this properly."
"You don't have to go," Evelyn said, hurriedly, reaching out for her old friend - who jerked backwards, wearing a small, wry smile.
"Oh yes I do," Hannah replied. "It's hard for me to remember sometimes, but Amber's a grown woman now. And she needs to talk this out with you, adult to adult. Without her mother holding her hand."
With that, she left, and Evelyn slowly turned to face Amber.
She swallowed, clutching one hand in another and tracing her thumb over and over the inside of her palm. Again, that flicker of hope lit up again, but Evelyn knew there was no way this story had a happy ending...
Did it?
Another moment ticked by, as Evelyn waited for Amber to say something. Even in the midst of her shame she couldn't help but notice how radiantly beautiful the younger woman was.
Diapered by my Mom's Lesbian Best Friend Page 11