The Shepherd's Heart Series: A Boxed Set Book Bundle Collection Volumes 1-4

by Lynnette Bonner

  A gun cocked and he froze, sure that at any moment he’d be passing through the gates of glory.

  “Mister.”

  It was a new voice and not one Conner recognized. He held his breath.

  The newcomer continued, “I think it would be smart for you to hurry on back to whichever coward sent you out here to hunt down this cowpoke and tell him that if he wants a fight, he should come and get it like a man.”

  Conner released a puff of air. This man must be an angel sent from God himself! He blinked, realizing that his sight was back, but still all he could see was blackness. Everything was in total darkness now as black clouds obliterated the moonlight, but Conner heard a rapid scuffing and scrambling and then dead silence for a beat.

  “You must be Conner and Ron?” the newcomer asked.

  Conner was slow to respond, still processing the last few minutes.

  “You okay?”

  With a shudder Conner finally managed, “Yeah, thanks.”

  Ron moaned and Conner scrambled to his side. “Who are you?” he asked, as he slipped the rope off over Ron’s head.

  “Name’s Jason. Nicki got worried when it grew dark and you hadn’t arrived back home. She hired me today, and asked me to come out looking for you.” He reached behind Ron from the other side. “Here, let’s get him up on his horse and back to the house.”

  Dinner was a solemn, quiet affair.

  Ron held a bag of snow to his head, and Tilly had fussed over the cut on Conner’s neck, making sure it was cleaned and bandaged.

  Nicki had prepared a meal of fried chicken, mashed potatoes, gravy, canned green beans, and biscuits, with lemon-meringue pie for dessert. Plenty of hot coffee for the adults and fresh, cold milk for Sawyer accompanied the meal.

  Jason did a double-take when Nicki approached the table wearing a dress. If he had thought her beautiful before in the baggy pants and shirt, she was decidedly more so now. His eyes lingered on her face. Quite possibly, she was the most beautiful woman he had ever seen.

  She glanced at him, but he did not look away. He could see that she was ready to give up. Whatever was in that wire had convinced her she wouldn’t be able to make it and now, with the attack on Conner, she was determined to be done with this place. Stubbornly so. Her look was defiant, daring him to challenge her decision to give up. He had never been one to pass up a dare. He kept staring until she looked away, flustered.

  Jason sighed. He wanted to help her; to encourage her; to infuse her with strength. His look had been meant to assure her that she could make it through this time. Whatever had been in that telegram couldn’t be all bad. God would help her work through it. Where had her determination of the morning gone?

  Nicki broke into his thoughts. “Jason, I know you’ve met, but I’d like to formally introduce you to my two ranch hands, Ron and Conner.”

  The men chuckled and looked at one another. Jason had immediately taken a liking to both of them, and he stretched his hand out to each man with a nod.

  After a brief discussion about the day’s ordeals, they all made light conversation throughout the meal, as if sensing Nicki didn’t much feel like talking.

  When the dishes were cleared, Sawyer was occupied with Tilly, and everyone had a slice of pie with coffee, Nicki broached the unpleasant subject at hand. “William came to see me today.”

  The men looked at her—Jason with his elbows on the table, Conner over the rim of his coffee cup, Ron still holding the icepack to his head—each slowly chewing a bite of pie, knowing that she had more to say.

  “He brought me a telegram. From a bank in Prineville.” Nicki glanced at all three men, then turned her eyes back to Ron. “The bank wants the balance of the money they loaned to John when he bought this place. They say I have two weeks to pay off the loan, or they are going to repossess.” She sighed. “I didn’t even know there was a loan on the place. I wondered where John got the money but never even considered that he’d taken out a loan. Certainly not for this amount.”

  No one replied. Jason knew that each of them were lost in their own thoughts on how this new information was going to affect them all.

  Conner darted a glance across the room to where Tilly played with Sawyer before he raised his cup to his lips. When Tilly met Conner’s eyes with an alarmed look of her own, Jason knew there was more brewing in their glance than the desire to keep Nicki from losing her ranch.

  Jason broke the thick silence. “How much do you owe?”

  Nicki swallowed. “Five thousand dollars. I’m afraid there is nothing I can do. I’m so sorry.” She looked back and forth from Ron to Conner. “I will pack up and take Sawyer to California. Maybe I will be able to find my family there if they haven’t moved.” She shrugged, twirling her fork in the slice of pie in front of her. “There is nothing else to do.”

  Jason eyed her, savoring a mouthful of smooth lemon sweetness as he contemplated the situation. He had never been one to take defeat lying down. There had to be something they could do to keep this young widow from losing everything she had to her name. “Ron, tell me about the stock.”

  Nicki blinked at him. “Don’t.” She raised a hand to stop his line of thinking. “Just don’t. There’s no way we’re going to be able to raise five thousand dollars in the next two weeks.”

  Jason was undaunted. “Ron, how many cattle would you say John ran here?”

  Nicki glared at him. He looked away, waiting for Ron’s reply. Ron glanced carefully between Nicki and Jason, then slowly replied, “I’d say 150 or so.” He set the bag of snow down on the floor by his feet and took a sip of coffee.

  Jason calculated. “Not enough.” He drank some of the dark brew, his eyes on Nicki over the rim. “Even if you got twenty dollars a head, you wouldn’t be able to raise enough. And that would clean you out of stock, leaving you nothing to repopulate with.”

  “I figured that, Señor.” Nicki glared at him, her slender hands cupped around a hot mug.

  Jason raised a forkful of pie halfway to his mouth as he said, “You could sell some of your timber. I saw a large grove of tall pines not too far from here, and lumber is selling for an arm and a leg right now in Portland.” He finished taking the bite, wiped the corner of his mouth and raised his coffee cup, sipping.

  Nicki shook her head. “I have the contract. John signed something saying we would not sell anything that would decrease the value of the property until it is all paid for or we forfeit all the land.”

  This last comment struck a nerve. Something didn’t sound right about that to Jason. Why would the bank want that clause in there? All they should care about was getting their money back.

  Nicki went on. “Besides, we don’t have the time to cut them all down, get them to the mill, then haul them to Portland and sell them. Don’t you think I’ve considered all this?”

  “I don’t think there’d be enough anyhow,” Ron said. “Other than that one nice stand, the trees are pretty sparse out here. Just juniper and sagebrush mostly.”

  Jason nodded. “The cattle need some shelter from the winds on these wide-open places anyhow. We should leave the trees. Just a thought.”

  Nicki folded her arms and gave him an I-told-you-so look that would have melted butter. Her eyes were black with anger as they bored through him.

  Undaunted, Jason went back to considering the problem. He glanced at her, calculating the danger of pushing the she-bear further. The corner of his mouth twitched and he quickly looked down into the inky liquid in his cup.

  He’d bet his saddle no one had ever told her how beautiful she was when she was angry. Who would risk it? His mouth twitched again, and he spoke quickly before he could reason himself out of it. “I think you are giving up too easily.” Jason savored his last bite of lemon meringue and enjoyed the flame of her cheeks and the pulsing of the little muscle along her jaw. “Any other assets besides cattle?” He directed the question toward Ron.

  Nicki slapped her palms on the table with an unladylike growl and stood.
In his peripheral vision Jason saw Tilly jump. Nicki’s voice quavered as she spoke. “¡Este hombre! ¡Dispense! Excuse me! Ron, Conner, will you excuse us for a minute?” Nicki glared at Jason, jerking one finger toward the door. “¡Ben a fuera de la casa!” She spun and marched outside, not bothering to interpret for him but clearly expecting him to follow.

  Jason glanced from Ron to Conner and back again. Both men were suddenly extremely interested in their pie, trying to keep straight faces. Tilly and Sawyer had both stopped playing with the blocks on the quilt-covered bed and were staring at the door, befuddled. Jason took a sip of coffee, eyeing the low door that Nicki had just slammed. He smirked at the fleeting thought that he hoped she wasn’t waiting for him on the other side with a loaded shotgun. Then, rising slowly, he removed his hat from its peg and eyed the three adult occupants of the room. Conner and Tilly grinned unrepentantly and humor danced in Ron’s eyes.

  “A lot of help you three are,” Jason said, pushing his hat back onto his head. As he shut the door, he heard a burst of laughter from all three.

  8

  Nicki waited for him, arms folded against the chill, one small foot tapping the snow, her skirts blowing around her ankles.

  Seeing she had not brought her jacket, Jason ducked back inside and spoke to Tilly. “Where’s her coat?”

  Tilly indicated one hanging on a peg by the door and he took it down. Going back out, he held it out to her with a grin—a peace offering.

  She snatched it from him with a glare and tossed it around her slender shoulders. “You have no idea what I am going through, Señor. If I leave this place, two good men lose their jobs and those who are trying to scare me off win.” She turned sparking black eyes on him. “And Conner and Tilly, they have eyes for each other. What is going to happen to them if I leave? I want to stay! I just don’t see a way. I am not giving up too easily! I have thought of every option, yet you think you can come here and, in one day, fix all my problems?”

  Jason shrugged. “If that couple is meant to be together, God will see to it. And I wasn’t trying to fix all your problems. Just one.”

  Her black eyes blazed. “Are you implying, Señor, that I have other problems you would like to tackle as well?”

  Jason shook his head at her rationale, ignoring her barbed comment. “You have two weeks to figure something out. I just think it’s a little soon to be putting the horse out to pasture.”

  Nicki gave an unladylike snort. Her voice was low and dejected when she said, “This horse has been out to pasture from the beginning. It’s not too soon, Señor. We should have quit this place a long time ago.” She gestured. “Look around. We have lived here for almost three years, and this is what we have. The barn.” She waved her hand at it, its neglected appearance self explanatory.

  “A new roof and it will be good as new,” he injected.

  “The bunkhouse that is so cold in the winter time that only Ron and Conner will live there.”

  “Real polar bears those two, huh?”

  She didn’t smile.

  Jason shrugged. “All it needs is a little chinking. For now, we can make some from mud and grass. It’s not as good as the store-bought kind, but it will do in a pinch. Soon it’ll be so hot in there they’ll have to sleep with both the windows and the door wide open.”

  She ignored his attempted humor. “There aren’t any windows.”

  He glanced at the bunkhouse as he stuffed his hands into his pockets. “You’re right. We should put some in.”

  Nicki threw up her hands in despair. She pointed to the corral and started to say something, but he beat her to it.

  “All it needs is some lashing. The poles are all there.”

  “Señor—”

  “Jason, remember?”

  Nicki sighed. “Jason.”

  He smiled. “Yes?”

  She looked into his face and couldn’t say the words she knew needed to be said; couldn’t tell him that it would be better for her and Sawyer if he would just go back to where he came from; couldn’t tell him that he should stay out of her decisions. Her anger was suddenly gone. She wanted to believe him; wanted to hope. She wanted to save this ranch. Not only for herself but for all involved. For Ron, Conner and Tilly and yes, for herself as well. But mostly for Sawyer. So he would have something to call his own one day. Some days it seemed that only her love for Sawyer kept her going.

  Jason seemed to read her thoughts. Taking a step nearer, he looked down into her face, nodding toward the house. “Do it for your son. Fight for Sawyer, ma’am.”

  She hunched her shoulders into the wind. Was that the best thing for him? Maybe God’s plans for Sawyer didn’t include this ranch. “Maybe the best thing for Sawyer would be for me to go to California and find my family.”

  Jason glanced around the yard. “You’ve already given up, but I don’t think we’ve explored all your options yet. Just give me some time to look around the place and see if there isn’t some way we can save it.”

  Nicki was thoughtful for a moment before she responded, “No. I don’t want to live in limbo for even a little while longer. My world has been turned upside down, and I want to know what I am doing. I will go to California and find my family.”

  She started for the house, but Jason stepped in front of her. “Think what you could leave your son if you could save this place!”

  Nicki pivoted, hands raised in frustration. Bringing tightly clenched fists to her sides, she asked, “What do you care what I do? Do you need a job so badly?”

  “Do you believe in God?”

  His change of topic took her off guard, taking the anger out of her immediately. She blinked. “Sí.” She knew she was not acting in a very godly manner. The stresses of the last weeks had worn her down.

  “Do you believe that He loves us and cares what happens in our lives?”

  She nodded, wondering where he was going with this line of thinking and said a quick prayer of repentance, asking that the Lord would help her to hear what He wanted her to hear.

  “Let’s walk while I tell you how I came to be here.” He turned so their backs were to the wind and, hands behind his back, began to walk. “My father was killed in a bar room brawl when I was a boy. My mother turned to drugs after that, and it wasn’t but a few years later that she overdosed and I found her.”

  He adjusted his hat. “Grandma Jordan came and got us, my sister and I. She raised us after that and taught us about the Lord. But eventually I turned my back on Him and went back to Pierce City, intent on killing the man who had sold my mother the opium.” He rubbed the back of his neck. “Long story short, God protected me from doing that, but,” he cleared his throat, “there were a lot of things I did that weren’t right.” Turning back to look at her, he shoved his hands deep into his pockets. “I was bitter and vengeful, a womanizer, an alcoholic.” He sighed. “I still struggle against the desire for a drink sometimes. But God has faithfully brought me to this place in my life where I can truthfully say, ‘I mean to never turn my back on Him again.’”

  Nicki examined him quizzically, wondering what that had to do with her situation.

  He continued, “I didn’t want to take this job. My grandmother is getting up in years, and I wanted to stay close to her. She’s very independent, but the older she gets the more help she needs with things. I’d been away for a couple of months on that run to Dodge City and felt like I needed to stay near her for a while.

  “That’s why when Gram pointed out your classified, I didn’t want to take the job. But God wouldn’t let me rest. I couldn’t get that ad out of my head. Everywhere I went something reminded me of it until I knew I had to at least come check into it, or I wouldn’t be obeying God. I told the Lord that if the job was still open when I got here, I would take it. And here I am. I believe this is where God wants me, because I’ve had perfect peace ever since I rode in and made you drop that log on your foot.” He grinned at her.

  Nicki smiled gently. “Even when someone started shoo
ting at us?”

  His grin turned serious. “That only made me more determined to stay. And yes, God gave me peace even then. He brought to mind some verses from the ninety-first psalm, and I knew you wouldn’t be killed. Still, I wouldn’t recommend staring down the barrel of a gun again.”

  Nicki didn’t respond to his jest and all was silent for a long time. They had stopped walking and merely stood enjoying the cool crispness of the night air. The moon broke through a patch of clouds and glittered brightly off the untouched snow around them, the path they had walked holding the only marred patch in the whole expanse. The wind had stopped, adding to the peaceful feeling that filled the night air. The far-off rush of the Deschutes River could be heard in the evening’s stillness.

  Finally, Jason turned and looked her full in the face. “I said all that to say, give me a few days, ma’am.” He paused. “You remember the story of Esther in the Bible?”

  Nicki nodded, knowing precisely where he was going. “Who knows but that you were brought here for such a time as this.”

  “Exactly.”

  She angled him a look.

  He smiled. “Ten days?”

  She shook her head. “One week.”

  He extended his hand, and they shook on the deal. She started to pull away, but Jason’s hand tightened around hers. Her gaze flew to his.

  He studied her, his face serious, his thumb caressing the back of her cold hand. His hat shadowed his face, but after a moment she saw his mouth soften into a smile. “You won’t regret this.”

  She jerked her hand back to her side. “I already do,” she snapped. But she was chagrined to hear the husky crackle of her voice.

  Nicki was at the table finishing her morning coffee and feeding Sawyer his breakfast when a knock sounded on the door.

  Tilly, who had been working over the dishes at the wash basin, moved to answer it, a dishcloth in her hands. She pulled the door wide, and Nicki glanced past her to see who it might be.