True Calling

by Siobhan Davis

  Before I leave for the Academy Fenuka reminds me that my cookery lessons will start next week. I try to show the required level of enthusiasm but fail miserably. I admit to being a disaster in the kitchen—that’s usually Lily’s forte—but she encourages me to go into it open minded, that I may surprise myself. It’s a polite way of telling me to stop being so downbeat. I genuinely like Fenuka; I definitely lucked out there.

  He is lounging in the usual place when I come out of my room, practically blending into the floor at this stage. “Morning gorgeous,” he says in greeting. That’s another thing he’s going to have to tone down.

  “Hey.”

  “Do you know we’re rising superstars?” he asks.

  “I saw the footage,” I say with a grimace.

  “You don’t like it?” he asks in surprise.

  “I’m not good at being center stage. I absolutely hate seeing myself on camera.” Of course, he doesn’t know about my excessive blinking in photos, or realize that’s where my loathing for any type of camera began.

  “It’s just as well that I’m a media whore then,” he laughs, “I’ll cover it for both of us.” That’s exactly what I was afraid of. It reminds me of my request.

  “Get up, I need to ask you something,” I demand. He rises fluidly and I’m struck again by how devastatingly handsome he is, I’ll never hold onto him.

  “Hey, what is it?” he asks, as he notes my obvious distress.

  “Nothing.” I shake my head, before leaning in close so that I can whisper in his ear. “I need to speak to you privately, I know a place. Can you meet me in the Velo Station at five-thirty?” I ask.

  I feel his warm breath on my skin as he whispers, “That sounds intriguing Ariana, count me in.” I love how my name rolls off his tongue, it sounds so exotic when he says it, and quite frankly it’s doing strange things to my body at this precise moment. Focus! I chastise myself. That was relatively easy, but I knew it would be, the hard part will come later. I let him take my hand as we walk towards the elevator and I don’t object when he keeps a firm grip on it the whole way to the Academy. I let him kiss me briefly outside my class, with the knowledge that it will most likely be our last public kiss for a while.

  I haven’t seen Eve all day and her status never changes from ‘unavailable’. I decide to contact her mother as I’m genuinely worried about her. Despite the fact that she’s obviously at work, Dr. Zousa answers my call promptly. She tells me Eve is sick and has been confined to bed for a few days. Poor Eve, this is all she needs on top of everything else. I ask Dr. Zousa to give her my love and offer to call around later, but apparently it’s infectious and there’s a strict ‘no visitor’ policy in operation.

  At lunch, noting that I’m on my own, Cal invites me over to his table and introduces me to his buddies. They seem like a nice bunch, I’m genuinely surprised. I’ve always avoided them; I’m ashamed to admit that I had a lot of preconceived notions, which I realize now were completely unjustified. I can see clearly that I was the prejudicial one. I really warm to one of the guys in particular—Ben Winters. I wonder where I’ve heard that name before. I panic at first that maybe he’s on my list but I force myself to calm down; I’m quite sure that Cal would have mentioned that.

  Ben is of medium height, quite stocky in build, with short black hair and sallow skin. He is studying to be a doctor, like Lily, and he’s only here today because of an unexpected free period. He’s quite shy but seems genuinely interested in getting to know me. I am thoroughly enjoying our conversation when Cal interrupts us. “Hey back off Winters, no smooth-talking my girl. I’ve enough competition to contend with as it is,” he says as he winks at me. I see the glint in his eye and I know his teasing is in good humor. I’m totally embarrassed when he kisses me goodbye in front of all of them. “I’m very partial to those blushes,” he whispers in my ear, “don’t ever change.” I hear them ribbing Cal mercilessly as they walk off.

  The afternoon seems to drag on forever but at last the bell sounds and I’m free to go. I arrive at the station first, but it’s only a few minutes before I spot Cal walking purposefully towards me. “Hey gorgeous,” he says as he plants a quick kiss on my lips. He’s becoming very accustomed to me, I think. One part of me is delighted, the other part uncomfortable. “Where are we going?” he asks.

  “Strata,” I say but I give nothing else away, acutely conscious of all the cameras.

  When we arrive in Strata, I’m a little confused on where to go, the last time I was here we were in the rovercraft and we didn’t actually pass the station. I decide to risk activating the GPS on my data-cuff, they can track me anyway to the point of the last camera. My dad said the Vita can’t be traced in Region 8, and I hope he’s right; otherwise, I’m about to ruin everything. I know Cal is dying to ask me what’s going on, but he’s smart enough to keep his mouth shut, and we talk about trivial matters as we walk. Eve was right—again—he’s so funny and I can’t stop myself from laughing. I cannot remember a time when I felt this joyous, he seems to be bringing out the best in me these days. Considering all the anxiety I was feeling over ‘The Calling’, the reality is far better than I could’ve hoped for.

  When we arrive at the illusory mountain, I place my finger to my lips, to advise Cal to be quiet. I know the camera can’t pick us up here, but I’m not sure if there are any audio feeds around. I feel my way to the area where my father pulled back the sheet and I can see the amazement in Cal’s eyes as I peel it back and indicate for him to step through. Once we’re inside, and I have secured the sheet in place, I allow myself to breathe. “Okay, it’s safe to talk now,” I tell him.

  “What is this place?” he asks, just as I did, and I explain it to him as my father explained it to me. And it’s not that I don’t trust Cal, I’m not quite sure why, but I tell him I happened across it by accident one day. I leave my dad out of the equation altogether.

  “Let’s find a place to sit down,” I say as we follow a natural path through the trees. After a few minutes, we come across a small, circular opening in the trees and sit down on a fallen log. The sun is shining through and there’s a lovely natural warmth seeping through my bones. I suddenly feel very homesick, the setting reminds me so much of the woods in Connecticut.

  Now that it’s time to talk I’m tongue tied; I’m not sure how to start this conversation. I decide to go with the less confrontational subject first. I tell him about Eve and how upset she was last night, I then run my suggestion by him.

  “I don’t know Ariana,” he says. “My father and I don’t have the best relationship, and I’ve never known him to break the rules.” I am totally disheartened.

  “Is there any harm in at least asking him? Or would that get you into trouble?”

  “No, but I’m pretty sure of his response, so don’t get your hopes up. As for getting into trouble, well that’s never stopped me before,” he says mischievously, and at that moment I can picture him as a naughty little boy running rings around his parents. I’m touched that he’s willing to try, for me, for Eve, and I lean forward and kiss him without even thinking about it.

  “Thank you.”

  “Well, if agreeing to your requests equals a kiss each time, then I’m more than happy to concede to everything you want,” he says giddily.

  “You might regret saying that, when you hear what I want next.”

  “Go on,” he implores.

  So I tell him how much I hate the attention of the cameras, and the invasion of our privacy, and how I will comply with ‘The Calling’ as much as I need to but that’s it, nothing more. He listens without interrupting and his expression is neutral so it’s hard to gauge exactly how he’s taking this. I tell him that I’ve no desire to participate in the ‘Amor Regale’, and the very thought of it makes me almost physically sick.

  “Why?” he asks.

  That’s when I really start opening up to him. I talk of my ambition for my career, my unhappiness at the whole notion of forced marriage and motherhoo
d. I tell him that the idea of being paraded across Illumina for the entertainment of the nation is detestable to me. I’m careful not to appear too condemning of the authorities, conscious of whose son he is, but it wouldn’t be that difficult for him to read between the lines, if he wanted to.

  I must have spoken for the last twenty minutes and I can’t continue without first getting some reaction from him. “So have you changed your mind about me now?” I ask.

  “Yes ... but not in the way you most likely think,” he says and he takes me completely by surprise when he pulls me onto his lap and kisses me passionately. I’ve never known kissing like this, and I bask in the pleasure of it, as every nerve and sensation in my body sings in harmony. I run my fingers through his hair and he pulls me even closer to him; I never want to let go, but he suddenly breaks the kiss and eases me gently into a seated position beside him.

  “What did I do wrong?” I ask genuinely puzzled.

  “Nothing, in fact, quite the opposite,” he says. When he looks at me I see the excitement in his face. “I could kiss you all day long Ariana and it still wouldn’t be enough,” he says longingly. I blush at his meaning and it helps break the tension. “That’s my favorite color on your skin,” he says, as he takes my hand and plants a gentle kiss on the back of it.

  “So, what did you mean when you said you had changed your mind about me,” I ask.

  “You’ve always fascinated me Ariana, from the very first moment I met you. Initially, I thought it was because you were so indifferent to me, but the more I caught a glimpse of the real you, the more I realized that I liked you for you. You’ve real spirit, that’s very appealing to me.”

  Cal then opens up to me, and I start to understand how we were deemed a good match; his outlook is so similar to mine, in many ways. He talks of the difficult relationship he has with his father—judging by the stories he tells—they seem to butt heads a lot. His mother died when he was ten years old and he doesn’t have a close relationship with his older brother Jaden. His only true familial bond is with his sister, Melandra. He struggled at first upon the move to Novo, but throwing himself into his Cadet training helped channel those emotions into something positive. He talks warmly of Ben, his BFF since they were in kindergarten. I learn that Ben is homosexual, and the two of them had set up a youth foundation to help other teenagers in coming to terms with their sexuality. Part of the frustration he endured when he first moved here was due to the fact that the government wouldn’t give approval for them to continue the foundation on Novo. He too has mixed feelings about the forced marriage policy and has fought bitterly with his father over the subject many times. He hopes to have a successful military career and to use it to influence positive change. He worries, as I do that all the freedom we took for granted on Earth will eventually be eroded by the Novo authorities. While he isn’t really happy to have to refrain from any romantic gestures in public, he understands the logic of my reasoning. I sense that if the opportunity arose, Cal wouldn’t be shy of partaking in any form of rebellious activity.

  “I see what you meant,” I say once he stops talking.

  “About what?”

  “That if I took the time to know you I would like you. You were right, I do, and I’m glad I did,” I say sincerely.

  “Thank you Ariana. I try to be discreet, to keep my opinions in check, but it’s challenging. When I’m mouthy, it drives my dad insane. I got a right roasting from him for asking that question the day of the presentation. I sometimes overhear him on conference calls, some of the stuff I hear they’re planning makes my blood boil. Not that there’s anything I can do about it, except vent inside. You must be the same, with your dad holding the position he does,” he says nonchalantly.

  “My father doesn’t conduct any work calls from home, at least if he does I’ve never heard him,” I say truthfully. “I’m plenty mad at the stuff that’s in the public domain. At least we can vent together now, it’s never good to internalize these things.”

  “It’s good to have our own special place where we can be ourselves without any prying eyes,” he agrees.

  “Yes, but we have to be careful, to ensure we’re not followed or ever discovered. I’m pretty sure this counts as an act of treason, and I don’t fancy being the first guest of the new penitentiary. Let’s agree to keep this between us, OK?” I say firmly.

  “Agreed,” he replies and I just know that he can be counted on to keep the secret.

  Before we leave I feel the need to clarify the new ground rules. “So no more kissing or hand-holding in public, okay?” I ask.

  “OK,” he says hesitantly.

  “Hopefully the public will lose interest in us then and all the bloody staring will stop,” I say. My irritation is discernible. “And you’ll have to stop calling me gorgeous,” I add.

  “I’ll try, but it’s just automatic when I see you, you always look so hot.”

  “Stop it,” I say, assuming he’s teasing me again.

  “I am deadly serious, I’m very attracted to you,” he says and this time I do believe him. I beam at him as he swoops me up in his arms and spins me around. All too soon we spot the sun going down and reluctantly concede that it’s time to call it a day.

  ***

  I thrash about in bed all night long, the result of another night of distracting dreams.

  Zane is arguing furiously with the same military man as he shows him a steady succession of images, in print and on the screen. Zane seems distressed by the pictures as he frequently puts his head in his hands. He totally loses it when he’s shown the last image—gradually the photo takes shape in front of my eyes. It’s my father.

  CHAPTER 9

  I am startled instantly from my sleep; the picture was most definitely of my father. He was in his Commander’s uniform coming down the front steps of the NSAF building, apparently unaware that he was being captured on film. What’s going on? Why do I keep seeing these things? And who is the man showing Zane my father’s picture? And more importantly why?? I’m too wired to go back to sleep, so I get up and go for an early morning run.

  When I arrive back at the house, I’m delighted to discover that my painting has been delivered. I’m doubly delighted to see they’ve also given me the easel, paints and supply of canvases. I feel a strong creative urge and wish I could paint right this minute, but there isn’t enough time before school, and tonight is the speed dating event. Indulging my passion will, unfortunately, have to wait.

  Cal runs to catch up with me as I walk to the Academy. “Good morning gor...,” he starts, but stops the minute he sees my fierce expression. “Ariana,” he simply says.

  “Good morning Cal, I hope you slept well,” I say formally.

  “I did, I had the most amazing dreams,” he says with a wide grin. I can only imagine.

  We part cordially as we go to our respective classes; I miss him already, this no touching rule is going to become unbearable very quickly. I have to remind myself that firstly, it was my idea, and secondly, we’ve only been close for a few days. It’s just that he seems to have become such an important part of my life so quickly, and I feel an acute ache for his touch. I wonder when it will be safe to return to our hideout.

  Eve isn’t in class again today and I wonder if she’ll even make the speed dating event tonight.

  I travel alone to the convention center after school to be prepped. I gasp when I see the outfit that Fenuka has designed for me to wear. It’s a beautiful white Grecian style dress, made of soft jersey material, it drapes gently at the front. It has a high round neck and long sleeves that are cuffed in a layer of gold leather. It stops at my knee and the length combined with the material gives it a more causal look so that it’s not too formal, it’s perfect for the occasion. A pair of mid-height gold sandals and glittery clutch bag complete the look. She does an amazing job on my hair and make-up; my hair is styled into soft curls that flow naturally down my back. The make-up is subtle except for the eyes which are quite dramatic, she�
��s added a touch of gold shadow to my smokey eyelid and encased my lashes in a sleek layer of black eyeliner. I’m pleased with my reflection and it gives me the necessary boost of confidence, enough to hopefully get me through this ordeal tonight.

  ***

  Back home, after dinner, my mother surprisingly offers to drive me to the convention center. I gladly accept, because I don’t want to travel on the Velo in this get-up. The butterflies hit when we’re just around the corner and I feel a sudden desire to vomit. I really wish Eve were here. I call her immediately. Despite the fact that she’s still unwell she is already on her way, apparently not even an infectious illness is allowed to disrupt the flow of the pageant.

  Eve has that sickly green pallor that’s a dead giveaway; however, her coordinator has tried to mask it with a thick layer of make-up that is not Eve’s usual look. She wears a gorgeous knee length pink shift dress with a white shrug, it suits her perfectly. “You look great,” I say as I move to hug her, but Eve backs away hurriedly.

  “I’m still infectious, you shouldn’t come too close,” she says hoarsely.

  “Oh Eve, you sound terrible, I can’t believe they’re forcing you to do this tonight.”

  “I got a shot of something that’s supposed to make me innocuous, but I don’t want to take any chances all the same,” she says.

  “So what do you think about all this now?” I ask her softly.

  “I’m fine. Obviously it wasn’t meant to be with Evan. I will trust the government and the choices they’ve made for me, I’m sure there will be one of them I like,” she says neutrally. I’m not surprised, Eve has never been a dissenter. I totally forgot to ask Cal today if he’d spoken to his father yet, I resolve to get an update at some point during the night.

  The convention center has been completely lit up for the event and it’s a joy to behold. The glass front is bright and sparkling and there is music playing in the background. Other suitors are walking in and we follow the crowd.