Squirrel & Swan Stolen Things

by M. D. Archer

  Tim cooed as he rocked the baby in his arms. “She’s incredible,” he gushed, finally tearing away his gaze to look up at the baby’s parents, Liz and Craig from next door.

  “I know, right?” Craig grinned. Liz reached out for the baby and Tim reluctantly handed her back.

  “Can I get you a beer? Or a wine?” Tim offered. “You three are welcome to stay for our barbeque. It won’t be loud, or late, either way,” he added.

  “None for me, I’ll be breastfeeding again in a minute,” Liz said. “But a water would be great.”

  “A beer would go down a treat,” Craig said.

  “Grab a seat outside. We’ll be out in a sec,” Tim said. Once Liz and Craig had ambled out to the back deck, Tim turned to Paige. “You could at least show a little enthusiasm.”

  “What? I said she was cute.”

  “Yeah but you managed to make it sound as if cute was a bad thing.” Tim shook his head, then went to the fridge. “You agreed to this barbeque, remember?”

  “Yeah, and here I am,” Paige said. “You didn’t say the crying and pooping machine was going to be here, though.”

  Tim shook his head. “Grow up, Paige.” He stalked out to the deck.

  Paige stared after him. That was about as rude as Tim ever got. What was his problem? This get-together had been Tim’s idea and Paige had gone along with it like a good girlfriend. It was unrealistic of him to expect her to be charming as well.

  “She’s sleeping through the night.” Paige heard Liz declare from the deck.

  Paige looked around the kitchen wondering if she could come up with a reason to stay inside. The doorbell rang. “Thank god,” she said, hurrying down the hall.

  She threw open the door. It was Leo. And he wasn’t alone.

  “Hey, Leo.” Paige looked at the woman beside him. Average height and size, with dark hair and large green eyes that enhanced her kind of confused expression. “Who’s this?” Paige said.

  “Paige, this is Jane.”

  “Oh right,” Paige nodded. “Jane.”

  “Hi,” Jane said with a small smile.

  “Paige can I talk to you for a sec?” Leo said. “I need to update you on, uh, the current case.” He turned to smile at Jane. “Are you okay here for a moment? Sorry. They like to keep their cases confidential.”

  “Okay.” Jane’s head bobbed in a nervous nod.

  Leo and Paige went into the spare bedroom at the front of the house. “Listen,” he said, dropping his voice. “We’re not here to talk about Jane, okay? Her memory... her situation. She wanted to meet you first because she’s scared. So don’t mention anything and then after tonight she’ll probably trust you enough to talk.”

  Paige nodded. “Suits me. Soph and I have agreed we’re not working tonight.” She opened the door and returned to the hall. “No more work talk from now on, I promise,” Paige said. “Come inside and get a drink.”

  “Thank you,” Jane said gratefully. “And nice to meet you.”

  “You’re an improvement on his last date,” Paige replied, throwing Leo a look.

  Leo’s eyes widened in horror. “Paige,” he hissed.

  “What? It’s true. Tim?” she hollered down the hallway. “Leo has a new lady friend.”

  “READY TO GO?” SOPHIE asked Myra.

  “I’ll just grab my bag,” she replied, ducking into her room.

  As Sophie waited by the front door, she realised she was a little lightheaded. She’d had half that bottle of wine with Hannah on a totally empty stomach. She resolved to eat something substantial as soon as she arrived at Paige’s.

  “Let’s go,” Myra chirped happily.

  As Sophie shut the door behind them, she noticed Myra was texting someone. She didn’t think she’d ever seen Myra messaging anyone before.

  “Where does Paige live?” Myra asked as they waited at the kerb for the Uber to show up.

  “Kitenui Avenue. It’s only five minutes by car.”

  As the car arrived, Sophie saw Myra send another text.

  When they reached Paige’s house Sophie found out the reason.

  Myra clutched at Sophie’s arm. “Don’t be mad.”

  Sophie met her eyes. “Why would I be mad?”

  “Because I invited someone to come with us.”

  “Really?” Sophie was amazed. “Who?”

  “Her name is Zelda and she’s kind of a new friend from university. At least, I hope she will be my friend. I-I don’t know if you’ve noticed but I don’t have many of those.”

  “Oh, Myra.” Sophie gave her a smile. “Of course. I’m sure that’s fine.” They started up the path to the front door. “Wait,” Sophie said. “Zelda. Her name isn’t Zelda Ko is it?”

  Myra’s eyes went wide. “How did you know?”

  “Oh, uh, you know how small Auckland is.”

  Zelda Ko, the true crime enthusiast who was desperate to interview Sophie and Paige, was the same Zelda who’d recently befriended Myra? It could be a coincidence but most likely it wasn’t. Sophie didn’t have the heart to tell Myra that Zelda might be using her.

  PAIGE WAS DOING HER best to play the dutiful host, helping Tim sort out drinks and food for the dozen or so people milling in the kitchen, dining room, and back deck. Tim appeared to still be mad at her, and while Paige felt that Tim was being a little unreasonable, she also found herself trying a little harder at the hosting thing. Maybe deep down a small part of her felt something akin to guilt, but about what exactly she wasn’t ready to examine.

  Paige took a few empty glasses into the kitchen and found Sophie refilling her glass of champagne from a bottle of Lindauer Special Reserve. Paige had only seen Sophie three times so far this evening, and each time she’d been doing exactly this.

  “Geez, Soph, you’re kind of pounding the bubbles.”

  “I’m fine,” Sophie said, taking a swig of champagne. She let out a little burp and shook her head. “Did you see Zelda is here?” She hiccupped then giggled.

  “Yeah, can you believe it? The nerve.”

  Sophie giggled again.

  “What’s funny about that?”

  “It’s so... you.”

  Paige looked completely dumbfounded. “What does that mean?”

  “Nothing.” Sophie shrugged.

  “Seriously, what’s up with you? Is everything okay?”

  “I don’t know. I just... Hannah came over before.”

  “To your house?” Paige stopped what she was doing to stare at Sophie incredulously. “What did she want? She still hasn’t gotten back to me about the stakeout plan. Is she backing off that idea?”

  “Maybe, yeah. I don’t know. She wants a fresh start, for us to put the whole, Josh thing,” Sophie air quoted these words, “behind us.” She twisted her mouth. “It’s kind of... The Josh thing is a bit freaky and the Hannah thing is a bit intense. I’m not sure how I feel about that. Half of me is suspicious, half of me feels guilty and mostly I’m just anxious about all of it. And then we have Leo and Jane.” Sophie threw her hands up.

  “What about them?”

  “They look like they’re falling in love. The way Leo looks at her... I just don’t...I don’t know...”

  “What about Wade?”

  “Exactly.”

  “Pardon?”

  “Wade’s lovely.”

  “And?”

  Sophie lifted her shoulders in a clumsy shrug. “Dunno. All I know is that I don’t look at him the way Leo looks at Jane.”

  “Is that why you didn’t invite Wade tonight, because you’re not sure about him?”

  “No, I thought it was too soon.”

  “Really?”

  “Yeah, I mean, I don’t know... I keep asking myself. Maybe this is it, a nice guy, who’s gorgeous and charming and sweet and he likes me. He’s not useless, he’s kind. He doesn’t have any deal breaker flaws. Yeah, why didn’t I invite him?”

  “Are you asking me?”

  “No. It was rhe-rhegorc...” Sophie burped. “It was a qu
estion that doesn’t need an answer.”

  “I’m cutting you off, Soph. If you can’t pronounce rhetorical, then—”

  “Oh.” Sophie made a sad face. There was silence until Sophie leaned forward and hiccupped again. “Okay, fine,” she said. “I’m asking you. Why not. Why didn’t I invite Wade?”

  “Because you’re in love with someone else,” Paige said.

  ZELDA WENT OVER TO where Leo and Jane were standing with Tim near the patio doors.

  “Jane, right? Myra told me you have amnesia. That’s so cool.”

  “Cool?”

  Zelda peered at Jane’s face. “Can you remember anything?”

  “Sorry, who are you?”

  “Zelda.” She waved her hand in the direction of Myra, on the couch alone, but not looking at all unhappy as she looked around with wide eyes. “Friend of Myra’s,” she added, as if that explained things. “Hi again.” She nodded at Tim and Leo whom she’d introduced herself to earlier.

  “Where did you get your clothes from?” Zelda said, eyeing Jane’s very white sneakers and her new-looking dress.

  “Pardon?”

  “If you don’t have any clothes except the ones you were found in, where did you get those from?”

  Jane cast an appreciative look at Leo. “He’s been so kind.”

  “Leo bought you these?”

  “They weren’t expensive,” Leo said, blushing.

  Sophie lurched over to the group, staggering a little as she tripped on something non-existent. “Whoopsie,” she said. “Hi,” she added to Jane, coming to a clumsy stop next to her.

  “I’m Jane.”

  “Sophie.”

  Jane looked past Sophie to the food table. “Those sausage rolls smell delicious. I might just... Excuse me.” She reached in between Zelda and Sophie to pick one from the table.

  “I hope you’re not a vegetarian and you haven’t just forgotten,” Sophie said with a giggle. Tim and Leo looked at Sophie, both frowning.

  “Are you okay, Soph?” Leo said.

  “Maybe a sausage roll for you as well?” Tim added.

  “Hey,” Zelda said to Jane. “Turn around?”

  Jane frowned. “Pardon?”

  When Jane didn’t move, Zelda went around her to inspect the top of her back. “That’s an unusual birthmark.”

  Sophie craned her head to also look at Jane’s back. “It’s like a diamond.”

  “I-I have a birthmark?” Jane said.

  “Um, yes. You don’t know?” Zelda said.

  Jane’s eyes filled with tears. She clapped her hand over her mouth then hurried away.

  “Of course she doesn’t know,” Leo said, casting an irritated look at Zelda then following in Jane’s footsteps.

  “Awkward,” Sophie slurred.

  “Okay, you are definitely having a sausage roll and some potato salad,” Tim said firmly.

  “Whatever.” Sophie drunkenly waved her hand. As Tim busied himself getting her a plate of food, Sophie pulled out her phone. Half-closing one eye in order to see better, she opened up the ridesharing app. Squinting, she put in the address of the place she wanted to go and saw that there was an available driver right around the corner.

  She needed to talk to him.

  ZELDA LEFT THE BARBEQUE, went directly home and straight up to her bedroom, giving only the briefest replies to her parent’s questions about the party.

  She opened up her True Crimes folder and started going through each file.

  That diamond-shaped birthmark.

  She’d seen it before. But where?

  ROMAN EYED HIS PHONE display. Anya was calling. Was this a good or a bad thing? Was she finally showing an interest in him?

  “Anya?” he said. “I’m still at the station. Paperwork.”

  “She’s here. I can’t believe it,” she hissed.

  “What? Who, where?”

  “That woman. from the agency you worked with. Sophie. She followed me home from the supermarket, Roman. She’s standing on the street next to our letterbox, right now. What the hell is going on?”

  Roman pulled the phone from his ear, eyed the display as if this might somehow explain the strangeness of this call, and frowned.

  “Sophie Swanephol?” he asked. “Is standing outside out house. Are you sure? That’s...”

  Unbelievable, Roman finished the thought to himself. Was this some game of Anya’s? To add intrigue? To spice things up in their failing marriage. It would be a U-Turn, but she’d done it before.

  “Wait she’s... I think she’s going around the back,” Anya said, her voice low and angry. “Get home. Now.”

  14

  Monday morning, Paige was already at her desk when Sophie arrived at S & S Investigations.

  “Well, well, if it isn’t Miss Drunky Pants.” Paige said, grinning.

  “Shut up.” Sophie dropped her bag on her desk and carried on through to the conference room to the coffee machine. “I wasn’t that bad.”

  “Hmm. According to who?” Paige jumped up to follow her. “Nah, you were mostly fine. Just slurry and kind of random. But Tim said you seemed upset.”

  Sophie turned away from the coffee machine to eye Paige for a moment but then shook her head. “I don’t want to...” She took her coffee over to the table and dropped down into a seat. “Did I leave my wallet at your house?”

  “Nope.” Paige topped up her coffee and joined Sophie. “And we did a good clean up yesterday so we would have found it. I can’t believe you didn’t say goodnight, by the way. Tim said he was getting you sorted with some food and you disappeared. He went out the front and saw you getting in a car. You yelled out that it was okay because it was an Uber. Did you get home okay?”

  A red bloom crossed Sophie’s cheeks. “Sort of.”

  Paige frowned. “What does that mean?”

  “Nothing, uh, I don’t want to talk about it.”

  “Soph—”

  There was a loud knock on the door of the outer office. “It’s Cecilia,” the voice announced.

  “In here,” Paige shouted back.

  A moment later Cecilia appeared in the doorway to the conference room. “I’d like an update.”

  “Well look at that. She’s back,” Paige said.

  “Hi, Cecilia,” Sophie added, following the human custom of greeting someone when they appeared even though neither Cecilia nor Paige seemed bothered by such matters. “Coffee?”

  “If it’s good?”

  “It is.”

  “We’ve been somewhat hampered by our inability to get a proper look at your office and at the hard drive,” Paige said sternly. “Leo thinks he can get a deletion date, which of course will help determine who had access.”

  “But you don’t need to bother with that. I told you when it happened. I even told you who did it. You just have to prove it for me.”

  “You told us when you think it occurred, and who you suspect did it. That’s not the same thing.”

  Cecilia rolled her eyes. “Well, I have my hard drive and laptop with me now, in the office.”

  “That’s all well and good but Leo isn’t here. He’s working on another case.” Paige spread her hands as if this was obvious information. And it was true, sort of. “We can’t just snap our fingers and make our associates appear,” Paige added, rather enjoying being able to say such things to Cecilia, who seemed to be refusing to acknowledge that she’d taken off in the middle of the investigation without telling them or giving them the information they needed.

  “But with a little bit of notice we’ll certainly be able to get him in,” Sophie said quickly, aware that neither Paige nor Cecilia were likely to back down from a possible confrontation about who was to blame for the delays in the investigation.

  “Fine, what about tomorrow?”

  “I’ll message him now and ask him to set up a time,” Sophie said, picking up her phone.

  “What about us, when can we access your home office?” Paige said. “We can make ourselves available a
t any time,” she added, throwing down the challenge.

  Cecilia narrowed her eyes. “How about right now?”

  “Fine.” Paige folded her arms.

  “Uh, great,” Sophie said cheerily. From what she could tell both Cecilia and Paige were rather enjoying being adversarial, and she didn’t want it to descend into actual hostility.

  “Wait,” Cecilia said, flicking through her phone, “I have an appointment in half an hour. Give me a couple of hours and meet me at my house.” She nodded. “What about Peyton, have you interrogated him yet?”

  “We tried to, but he’s left town for a few days.”

  Cecilia’s eyes went wide. “See? He’s clearly guilty.”

  “We shall see,” Paige said pompously. “In the meantime, do you know anything about his financial situation? We have reason to believe he might have some issues in that department.”

  “No. I mean, I could ask Sally, but I doubt she’d tell me. Confidentiality and all. She protects her clients.”

  “What about other enemies,” Paige said.

  “What do you mean?”

  “Someone like you must have enemies.”

  “Excuse me?”

  “What Paige means is,” Sophie said quickly. “Is that an established and very successful writer like yourself... there may be others who are jealous of you.”

  “Yes, but you already have his name.”

  Paige rolled her eyes. “Okay, what about Tammy and Geoff,” Paige said. “Those two are also being evasive.”

  “Really?” Cecilia said breathily. “How interesting, because if had to pick the most likely culprits in my writing group, it would be those two.”

  “Even though it was Annie who turned up at your house the night of your party?” Sophie said.

  “Yes. She’s a bit odd, but I think all she wanted was to talk to some industry people. She’s harmless.”

  “And Tammy and Geoff aren’t?” Sophie asked.

  “Now that I think of it,” Cecilia said, leaning on the table conspiratorially. “Do you know what’s interesting?”

  Sophie and Paige leaned forward too.