by Ron Foster
“Your friend Ezra was just telling me the same dog gone thing! Matter of fact he said you would be along eventually to pay me back if I lent him some cash money to go to town with.” Bobby said regarding Zack like he didn’t think any kind of repayment was forthcoming.
“Banks are dead for now Bobby. I can’t offer you any kind of repayment off hand. I am afraid that you are going to have to dig in your pocket and chip in some of that cash you got for my campers’ admission to your island or you are going to have a bigger problem on your hands with a bunch of starving possibly not thinking clear irate individuals.” Zack said in no uncertain terms that he was going to point the finger in bobby’s direction as the extended reasoning to their woes.
“Boy you are pushing me and I don’t like that tone of voice your using to get me to pay attention to other folks’ problems. “Bobby said as his Mexican workers looked to back up their boss if it looked like this dispute was going to get out of hand.
“Bobby I ain’t being pissy with you, no disrespect meant sir but we got us a situation that’s going to get out of hand or require anything your willing to do to help with. The damn island is full of folks and we got no way off and no food!” Zack demanded.
“Do what? Now I never guaranteed nobody nothing!” Bobby began before Zack cut him off.
“The problem is and remains what it is.” Zack began before Ezra said he had already told the man basically the same things Zack was telling him already and that he was considering pulling his gun on him to get some compliance.
“No man don’t even want to be thinking about pushing it that far yet, let’s talk to him civil a bit more.” Zack whispered back to Ezra as Donna and Rachel used their best negotiating skills with Bobby’s wife to try see things their way without the men butting heads and egos.
“We got to go to town now!” Rachel eventually said thoroughly convinced that Ezra’s appeal for cash for groceries was a worthy mission and smiled as Donna already had his wife getting her car keys ready Bobby agreeing or not to perform the same idea.
“Now everybody just holds your horses and wait a minute now! I am a businessman and this deeded properties landowner; I don’t take to jumping into things this quick. You all just hold your water a minute while I use some of my political savvy and pull to get some answers and help for now.” Bobby said reaching for his nonworking phone.
“Phones don’t work no more my friend! I am telling you this problem is bigger than the both of us and we got to get to town with all the cash we got! You in or out?” Zack said fondling his pocket pistol and eying the normally friendly landscape helpers to be conscripted into assisting with his grocery store raid.
“How are the people on the island?” Jose asked eying Zack’s sanity.
“They’re doing fine if you can hurry up and help us out by getting us to town before the well runs dry!” Zack said exasperated thinking time was running out to try to buy supplies before the stores closed their doors for a day or two waiting on the outcome of an event, they had no clue about,
“Boss folks need us.” Pedro said and waited on Bobby to agree,
“It’s kind of like a hurricane coming or just hit, the shelves in food stores be empty soon.” Ezra complained.
“I only got sixty bucks but your wife says that she will take me.” Donna pointedly said.
“Well then let’s go! I think we got maybe $1200 from the campers this weekend,” bobby said
“Count your wallet money and my purse too, these folks are right! We got big problems husband and I think its. best to do as they say.” Jackie said regarding the precarious position life had dealt them.
“I got a bit of cash put back that ain’t made to the bank deposit yet, let me go get that money and we can go to Winn Dixie food store.” Bobby offered.
“What other stores you got? Maybe we divide and conquer.” Zack offered thinking hit them all at once with different cars.
“Maybe we should stick together?” Rachel said considering.
“I don’t think people are that crazy yet but I never seen black Friday at a Walmart either because I got sense to stay home.” Zack said.
“My Workers can try the Publix’s store and you girls can try the local corner store while we boys try the Winn Dixie.” Bobby said contemplating.
“I am guessing that stores might put a limit on groceries like one cart per person if they are open at all, sometimes they say $100 0r something. Tell you what, lets everybody try the assigned food stores and then reverse order try other stores we been to for stocking up and meet somewhere away from them.” Zack said getting an answer to his unasked question of being able to spend what they had depleting shelf space best they could. Jackie checked the .38 revolver in her purse for accessibility as she warned everyone some folks might not take to kindly to the, appearing greedy or needy flush with cash.
Thunder was heard off in the distance and everyone got a “oh Shit! Can this day get any worse!” look on their faces as they pondered possibilities of what was next.
“I ain’t studying how long we can all tread water so let’s get ourselves moving!” Zack said and went to sit in Ezra’s truck and wait for everyone to catch up and go on the mission pressing on his mind.
“Damn Zack, leave it to your sorry ass to come up with a deserted island full of goats that floods on que and invite everyone you know to participate in an apocalypse party! “Donna said only half kidding about the meaning and intent of the verbal barb thrown in his direction designed to get a rise out of him.
“Hey, I did say it was a “come as you are.” Apocalypse! Folks should be remembering you read all the small print if you want to come to one of my affairs!” Zack quipped back with a goofy grin.
“Get in the truck Zack!” Rachel half snarled admitting he could be funny but now wasn’t the time to be playing comedian.
“Doing it now!” Zack replied and winked at Ezra that it was best to comply and not grumble much.
The convoy of Pedro, Jose, Bobby, Jackie and Ezra finally got under way in their own private owned vehicles heading for probably the last store-bought food they would ever see again.
Zack had his reservations, what if the stores were closed or they refused to sell? The immediate need was there but how far was he willing to go to get it satisfied today if no one would listen or understand the people on the islands plight.
4
Looters Luck
Things are nothing but what they seem in life on a normal day and it seems to be a natural born fact of indecision and discord about who could possibly begin to predict when the next terrorist attack or over medically prescribed OCD Ritalin raised teenager now a new pain med stealing junkie or gang banger with an attitude will do something incomprehensibly stupid and horrific. Today was about the same but with a twist, everyone going shopping has the same thought they needed to bring their gun because it was a disaster and forgot the rule of law still applied.
In such settings bullying, false bravado or just plain stupid thoughts of acting ghetto or unreasonable tend to have a Darwin effect on some! Now usually Zack was quite happy to let the trailer trash, meth heads and the entitlement crowd sort their own business out but the EBT card food stamp waving crowd wanting some chow just didn’t comprehend the stores couldn’t take them because the electricity was out. It looked like a small riot was about to take place and the stores elderly security guard couldn’t handle and he weighed his options about taking sides in the dispute as evidently a few good old boys were thinking the same.
In about two minutes he reckoned that guard would get over powered and a free for all rush would head for the doors if those two rednecks didn’t get to their trucks quick enough to pull out the deer hunting rifles or a couple tricked out ARs.
“We don’t want to be here… “Zack began before the security guard started spraying mace like a skunk with diarrhea!
Well that made the crowd retreat and over run the ones pushing forward which gave the guard an opening to run b
ack in the store and the manager locked it. and everyone else out as whoever had a gun inside pulled there’s and dared anyone to break down the door to come in. Now this was Alabama and most sane folks know not to try to tussle with folks hollering “I will shoot your ass off.” So, a non-peaceful stalemate ensued with those locked in the store and those who were locked out of the store.
“Told you that we don’t want to be here!” Zack said heading back to Ezra’s truck.
“What now Zack?” the man asked as he got in the driver’s seat.
“We don’t have much choice but to try around at the back entrance before they think of it and we either get locked in with the food or stay locked out.” Zack said.
“You got some screwed up logic my friend but I guess locked in with the food to lend an extra gun beats locked out without.” Ezra said not too keen on the idea.
“Ah hell, I been in that store before, they got a CB if it works and I bet it ain’t 5 minutes before the cops get here to help out. Better that we identify as good folks and get some groceries than find another place in the same condition or worse.” Zack offered
“So, the idea is we get locked in the store with the employees? Ezra said trying to digest what was what.
“You got a better idea?” Zack asked
“I guess no.” Ezra said seeing the parking lot looking like a kicked ant hill.
Zack got out of the truck and ran to the backdoor as a pimple faced teenage boy was trying to get a stack of boxes blocking it open out of the way.
“I got this son; we won’t let them crazy looters get in here!” Zack said pretending to aim his gun at ravenous chasing phantoms.
“Come on Ezra cover me while I get this door secured! Shoot them deader than hell if they try to get their sorry asses in here!” Zack called as his buddy reached out long caned himself to pick up the pace.
Once inside they quickly locked the door and congratulated the red headed boy for being so brave before the manager walked up with his .357 pistol in his hand to ask them who the hell they were.
“FEMA CERT team!” Zack said flashing his ID card and brandishing his brightly colored CERT vest in one hand.
“We didn’t want to be caught in uniform with all the crazies outside. Boy that was sure a close call! Don’t worry Law enforcement is on its way to help!” Ezra adlibbed and when the man turned to look over his shoulder at the desperate people at the front of the store, Zack flashed his buddy a thumbs up for such a great piece of improvisation.
“Yea the FED activated us about a half hour ago and said we should warn the food stores about this disaster but seems we got here a bit too late, everyone ok?’ Zack said with a dead pan I am an important looking official something or other.
“Did they tell you any orders or advisements on what I should do next?” the manager asked confused and bewildered as to his responsibilities during a disaster of this magnitude.
“No, they just said be sure to warn you and advise you to cooperate with us and law enforcement about getting some supplies to keep everyone functioning. Got to have continuity of business and government! Hey buddy, don’t tell nobody you seen us flashing guns, FEMA won’t let us carry them you know.” Zack said looking around suspiciously like a big brother camera or microphone was in close proximity.
“Now that’s stupid as hell! Why they want to put such a foolish restriction on you?” The manager who introduced himself as Vern said.
“That’s the way the crappy policy has always been and I say I would rather be judged by 13 than carried by four.” Zack related.
“Amen brother I ain’t allowed to have one either but you see what I got.” Vern said as more than one old lady employee or man brandished theirs and agreed.
“What do you mean by I am supposed to ensure that you and the police get emergency supplies?” Vern asked.
“Well I had me an official list and the signed directives and purchase orders but somebody snatched my briefcase right out of my hand a few minutes ago. Don’t take no purple script by the way for purchases until someone in charge says different, that aluminum briefcase I was carrying had a fortune of it in a big manila envelope!” Zack said.
“What’s purple script?” the manager asked.
“Military money, like they used in World War II and coupon books of rationing stamps for sugar and gas like they used during the great depression.” Zack said before the crowd evidently got their nerve back and started to bust a window in the front of the store in.
“I got this.” Ezra said and commenced to pop off a couple 9mm pistol rounds aimed high at the unbroken glass that somebody was using a garbage can on as a battering ram. The sudden quick gunfire from inside the store coming out panicked the mob outside and they retreated.
“Tell that crazy fool he can’t be doing that!” Vern objected.
“I can’t tell him anything, he is my Boss!” Zack replied.
“Damn boy your full of it, quit laying the bull shit on so thick.” Ezra whispered amused as he was supposedly talking out of earshot for a “consultation” with Zack.
“How much water you got? I need an inventory. Hey Vern is it? You’re the man in charge here and I tell you a secret my friend. You need to grab up what you want for your family before they commandeer everything for the friggin government declared disaster. I have seen this kind of shit happening a time or two before. By the way I advise you not to piss off that old bastard Ezra, he can be useful to sign off on immediate needs waivers for important people like store managers. Hey! I happen to know he loves canned spam so if you offer to be nice to him and leave a case or two of spam off the essentials inventory for his consideration to buy personally it goes a long way to making your life easier. Now before you say it, we ain’t trying to be cherry picking your goods and we got a bit of our own green cash money to spend besides that government scrip we had to pay you with for the government supplies. Discretionary Operational Funds they call it for times like this. Look we got delayed with to delivering your warning and directives because we were told a whole bunch of campers got flooded in when the dam released on Lake Jordan up on Spectre island, Wasn’t much that we could do for them stranded survivors because the causeways out but maybe if conservation or the fish warden can get a boat in the water we can get over there to help them out.” Zack offered.
“I still ain’t quite understanding who the hell you are and what’s going on.” Vern began before Ezra started talking some shit about the NASA Space Agency giving prior warning of an incoming CME and the disaster reserve being activated and the CERT teams being rounded up by the sheriff going door to door because the phones weren’t working and had Zack almost believing him!
“Where’s the driver of that ice truck parked outside?” Zack asked before a short heavy-set red-faced man said it was his.
“Put up your hand and repeat after me. I do solemnly swear. What’s the matter with you man? Stick your hand up! You don’t hear me?” Zack said as an old woman cashier with a derringer in back of the driver told the man he better sticks his hand up when asked.
“I will swear Mister but swear to what?” a man called Ramus spluttered raising his right hand.
“Oh hell, times a wasting and we will dispense with the formalities. I am supposed to make you take an oath to uphold the constitution etc. but I just need to borrow you and that truck of yours for a little while ok? You go make room in that truck and just throw that ice your carrying on the ground if they don’t have room in the store. Ezra will cover you with his pistol while you do that, now then Vern you got the shittiest job in the world at the moment but it won’t last long. This place is going to get locust picked over by every kind of government contingency plan that ever happened shortly and if you got sense god gave a goat you will listen to me and see for yourself and employee’s food needs before they get here. The sheriff when he arrives is going to tell you that he needs some of your food for the prisoners he has locked up in the county jail, the town cops need food for their base
of operations, the fire department needs some to keep functioning and I am sure the mayor of this town and any state troopers guarding him and your local political yokels want something too so let an old hand at hurricane responses help you out in your decision making process. I done this too long to answer all your questions and times too short before they get here or them looters get brave again so follow me around with a shopping cart and grab some of the same items that I get ok? Oh, and give me them two bag boys to help assist me also, there is an old folks home up the road I kind of like to make an unscheduled drop off at before I go to the EOC (Emergency Operations Center) to report in. That’s that bunker thing we got set up for disasters like this with all the radios, phones and computers and such.” Zack said before Ezra and the ice truck guy came running in.