by Lucy Knott
We remain quiet for a little while, just the crunching of our cookies can be heard against the pops and whizzes of the fireworks and the cheers and howls from the houses down the valleys and those that surround us a fair few metres away. Erin clambers onto my knee and is careful not to sit on my hair, gently moving it with her tiny caring hands, as I ease the rocking the swing makes with her movement as the countdown can be heard all around us.
Five, four, three, two, one …
‘Happy New Year, sweet girl,’ I whisper as Erin turns around and kneels up on my thighs and gives me a kiss on my cheek. She then pulls Dean towards her so she can kiss his cheek too and my cheeks sting with the smile brimming to my ears.
‘Happy New Year, ladies,’ Dean says, and it warms my heart. Erin wears a bewildered expression for a moment looking from me to Dean. I’m aware she hasn’t quite grasped the concept of New Year yet and is probably a little confused by all the commotion and by the fact I have let her stay up when it’s dark out, but then her face moves to an inch away from Dean’s and there is a cheeky glint in her eye.
‘You didn’t kiss her,’ she says, matter-of-fact.
‘I didn’t, did I?’ Dean replies after a pause. Both now look like they are in a meeting I have not been invited to. I stroke Erin’s hair and lean back, not wanting her to see me laugh at her innocent comment. I feel strangely relaxed, though even in the dim light of the deck I can see Dean’s cheeks are flushed, but he’s doing his best to remain confident for Erin’s sake. He leans over from next to me on the swing and I chuckle, putting him out of his misery, meeting him halfway so he can kiss me on the cheek.
By the look on Erin’s face you’d have thought Santa had just appeared for round two.
‘Right, munchkin, it’s time for bed,’ I say, scooping her up and onto my hip. She leans across to Dean and gives him a squeeze around his neck.
‘Night night, thank you for the best night ever,’ she says softly, causing me to choke back tears.
‘Night, peanut,’ he says, hugging her back a little gentler.
I nod at Dean to indicate I won’t be long. He stands as I head into the house waving at Erin who has her arms wrapped around my neck, her head already lolling off to sleep.
It doesn’t take long to brush Erin’s teeth and get her tucked up in bed. She makes no complaints and the minute her head touches her pillow she’s fast asleep.
I pass the kitchen on my way to the decking and stop in to pick up a bar of Rocky Mountain birthday cake truffle chocolate as I have no doubt that Dean and I could polish off Erin’s cookies and I couldn’t do that to her – though I know she’d be more than fine with it as long as I was happy and enjoyed them. She’s got that kind of beautiful and considerate soul.
When I step out onto the deck, Dean is sitting on the edge of the swing, his hands intertwined, looking across the peach horizon. The world has gained some peace now that the barrage of fireworks has stopped. The odd sizzle and crackle can be heard in the distance.
‘Hi,’ I say as I rejoin him on the swing, tucking my legs up underneath me though I’m not feeling the cold with Dean around. The night is gorgeous and fresh with thankfully no blizzard or chilly breeze whipping around us.
‘Hi,’ he croaks before clearing his throat, rubbing his hands on his trousers and leaning back so his shoulder rests against mine.
I snap the bar and hold it out to Dean who takes a piece and pops it in his mouth. I do the same. The chocolate satisfies my sweet tooth and my desire to celebrate this evening in my own way. Dean places his arm over my shoulders on the back of the swing and I find myself leaning into him a little. I offer up the bar and Dean cracks off another piece.
‘Birthday cake truffle,’ he starts before mulling over the packet with a grin on his face.
‘It’s my favourite,’ we say in unison. I can’t help but close my eyes, breathing in the woodsy lingering scent of the fireworks, the burning logs from neighbouring bonfires and Dean, who smells like the outdoors on that first day of summer: fresh, clean and yummy. The corners of my lips are curving upwards and as Dean casually kisses the top of my head, I breathe out, knowing that here right now, on this porch with Dean, is where I’m meant to be.
And do you know what? This scene isn’t going to weave its way into one of my scripts. This one I’m keeping just for me.
*
Enchanted by Wishes Under a Starlit Sky? Don’t miss How to Bake a New Beginning, another heart-warming and uplifting novel from Lucy Knott. Available now!
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Acknowledgements
Thank you to the amazing and wonderful Cara Chimirri for all your guidance, support, kindness and encouragement. I have loved sharing Harper with you and getting to work together on her story. It has truly meant the world to me and I’m grateful to have had the opportunity to work with you. Thank you to all the incredible team at HQ Digital UK and HarperCollins for all the work that goes into bringing my books to life. To Helena Newton for going through the copy edits, the awesome design team for designing such a gorgeous cover that I adore, Dushi Horti for proofreading and catching my oversights, and everyone at PR who organized my blog tour; you are all fantastic and I appreciate you all very much.
I don’t even know how to put into words how grateful I am for every blogger, reviewer and lovely persons of social media for your continued love and support with my books. Every tweet, mention, share and picture fills my heart with so much love and gratitude; I thank you all and am sending you all massive hugs. Shelby, Amanda, Kate and Matt, sending extra super big hugs to you all for your inspiration and for always making me smile.
Maxine Morrey and Katie Ginger, I adore you both so much. Thank you for always being a message away and for inspiring me every day. To all the amazing authors I have met (and those who I haven’t yet), thank you for being such an awesome group of people who support, encourage and lift each other up daily. I’m truly honoured to know you all, be it in person or through social media.
To my family, thank you with every piece of me. This book is very close to my heart and through all the plot twists and re-writes in my life, you all make me feel the magic and power of love each and every day. You truly are my world and I can’t thank you enough for everything. Also, to my family up above, there’s not a day that goes by that I don’t think about you all. Grandad, I am grateful every day for the strength and guidance you give me. I miss you so much, but you continue to inspire me in all that I do. Thank you!!
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Turn the page for an extract from How to Bake a New Beginning by Lucy Knott …
Chapter 1
Beans on Toast
Ingredients:
Bread
Butter
Heinz baked beans (Always stock up when you go to Target)
What to do:
Toast bread and heat up beans in a saucepan or microwave. (Never tell Amanda you use the microwave.)
Butter toast and drizzle beans over the top. (Doesn’t taste quite like home, but it will do, I suppose. Don’t get sad, you’re living your dream and don’t be ungrateful, the boys are awesome, and you’ve worked so hard to get to this point. Mmm beans, I wonder what Levi is up to? Why does England have to be six hours ahead when you’re spending another night alone and could do with a sister chat? Just eat your beans.)
Sabrina realized that she had been mindlessly shuffling paper for the past fifteen minutes. It was gone five in the afternoon and she needed to go home and pack. Yet, she was sitting at her desk, eyes wide, staring at the mini chandelier that hung from the ceiling. The crystals bounced light off the walls and led to the dreamy state Sabrina found herself in as she daydreamed about the day that Levi first burst into her office.
Why did she always
do this to herself? Every Christmas for the past two years she couldn’t get him out of her head. Was she really that lonely? Couldn’t she fantasize about men who weren’t off limits? Better yet, couldn’t she stop fantasizing altogether and venture into the real world and meet a non-rock-star man who wasn’t way out of her league? She huffed to herself as her phone rang, startling her. Seeing that it was her baby sister, Louisa, she put on an enthusiastic smile and answered with the cheeriest hello she could muster.
‘Are you all packed? Do you have everything ready for tomorrow?’ her not-quite-as-cheerful-sounding sister asked abruptly.
Sabrina blinked away the dancing crystals of the chandelier that were starting to give her a headache and went back to shuffling papers as she answered her sister’s questions. ‘Yes, yes, of course, Lou. I have everything organized – you know me, what am I if not organized?’ She felt a twinge of guilt for her white lie, but she didn’t want her sister to worry. Normally, she was the queen of packing, but with the band’s new release approaching and her brain often getting distracted by a certain drummer, she hadn’t quite been herself lately.
‘OK, so you will be on that flight tomorrow?’ Louisa asked, her voice a little imperious.
All Sabrina’s attempts at bubbliness evaporated. She snatched the band’s schedule from the desk and made her way to the door to head to the photocopier room. She was too tired to deal with Louisa’s sceptical, patronizing tone.
‘Lou, please. It’s Grandpa’s ninety-sixth birthday; of course I will be on that flight tomorrow. I am going to be there,’ she said with force. Her heels echoed along the deserted corridor. The cool office interior, bland cream walls and stark white furniture personified elegance and a modern flair in Lydia’s eyes, but at this time in the evening when most of the staff had gone home, it screamed cold to Sabrina. It lacked vibrancy in her mind and could do with some fresh flowers and a pop of colour.
‘Well, I’m just checking. It’s not going to be some glam, flashy party,’ Louisa added, a hardness to her voice that stung Sabrina and caused anger to bubble in her stomach.
‘I know it’s not going to be a bloody glamorous affair and I don’t bloody care. You know how much Nanna and Grandpa mean to me. I wouldn’t miss this for the world. I miss them, and I miss you all and I will be on that plane tomorrow, so please, give it a rest.’ She practically punched the copier to life and let out a frustrated sigh. She was growing tired of her sister’s guilt trips over missing family affairs, especially when Louisa knew how hard she worked, and especially as Louisa knew she was busting her butt for their big sister Amanda’s best friend and not just some random pop act.
Sabrina made a mental note to start adding pictures of the piles of paperwork and late-night sessions to her Instagram, to break up the once in a blue moon flashy press events – maybe this would appease Louisa.
‘We all miss you too and can’t wait to see you,’ Louisa whispered after a minute or two.
Sabrina collected the photocopies and decided to call it a day. She picked up her pace, wanting to get back to her office and get home to pack. It had been months since she had been home and though she felt nervous about leaving her boys, she could do with the break.
‘Look, I’m sorry for getting snappy with you but I’ll be there, and it would be nice if you believed me, for once,’ she said, softer now. As she walked past Lydia’s office she noticed the light was on. It hadn’t been on earlier. She had thought Lydia had gone home for the day. Squinting her eyes and sending a quizzical look through the glass, she noticed Lydia was not alone and her breath caught.
‘Is everything OK, Brina? I’m going to head to bed now – it’s pretty late here,’ Louisa said.
Sabrina tiptoed into her office as quickly and quietly as she could and gently closed the door behind her. She steadied her breath to answer Louisa: ‘Erm, sorry, yes, Lou. I’m fine and gosh, yes, please get some sleep. It’s already morning there. I love you and I’ll text you tomorrow.’
‘OK, love you, Brina,’ Louisa said before putting the phone down.
Sabrina placed her phone in her bag and shook her head. She needed to pull herself together; she was being ridiculous. Tears pricked her eyes as she gathered her belongings and dashed out of her office. Without glancing back at Lydia’s window, she took the lift to the ground floor. When the doors opened she marched to the huge glass doors and swung them open with force, letting the cool LA breeze graze her warm cheeks.
She felt ashamed for her dramatic performance and scolded herself for allowing Lydia to get to her so much, but this had been the final straw. Lydia could boss her around, criticize every move she made and talk down to her all she wanted – it was business; it was work – but to mess with her heart in this way was beyond ruthless.
How could she work for such a horrible woman? It was Lydia who had warned Sabrina to stay clear of dating clients. The company didn’t tolerate it and Sabrina was asked to promise that she would not date any member of San Francisco Beat. This rule, however, had only come into play after Lydia had heard that Levi and Sabrina had got rather close at the band’s album launch party two years ago. Sabrina had never heard of it prior to the event. And Sabrina hadn’t intended to be unprofessional, but it just sort of happened.
Naturally, she had pulled away from Levi, worried about being taken seriously, scared that she would get in trouble, that she was breaking rules. How silly had she been to throw away what she and Levi had – and for what? There hadn’t been any rules then, but now Lydia had gone and created and enforced those stupid rules. And she’d made it abundantly clear that when one of the boys dated it should be with a fellow star – a model, an actress, someone who could raise their profile, someone who was definitely not Sabrina.
She dragged her feet along the sidewalk towards her apartment. How could she have been so naive? Of course, Lydia had only been jealous – she had wanted Levi for herself. Sabrina realized this, but it was too late. The image from moments ago now burned in her brain: Lydia with her arms wrapped around Levi’s neck, falling with him onto the couch in her office.
Sabrina shuddered. She didn’t know what hurt more: the fact that this woman hated her so much or that she had thought Levi had felt the same way she had that night they kissed. Who was she kidding? What guy waited two years for someone? She didn’t live in a fairy tale; this was real life and in real life she had chosen work. She had stomped on the book of love without turning another page, and in doing so had well and truly placed Levi in the friend zone.
She didn’t have a right to be sad. It had worked out well for everyone. The band were doing fantastic and she had progressed tenfold with her job in spite of Lydia. Yet here she was, with another Christmas upon her, daydreaming of Levi. Whether she had the right to or not, she did indeed feel sad. She needed her grandpa’s pizza and she needed it now.
Chapter 2
Grandpa’s Pizza
Ingredients (I’m sure this makes a lot of mini pizzas; need to check on pizza for one?):
10oz yeast
1lb flour
Olive oil
1oz butter
Mug of water
Cheese and sauce
What to do:
Once yeast dough is formed (thank you, Grandpa), roll it out to fit the trays/baking sheets.
Place trays in clear bags (not Tesco bags like Grandpa did once; they will melt) and leave in warm oven until risen.
Once the base has risen, take the trays out of the bags.
Turn the oven on and when ready, cook one side of the base until golden brown.
Flip over and add sauce and cheese like Grandpa does.
Place back in the oven and allow cheese to melt and edges to turn golden.
With a tear in his eye Grandpa reached out and touched Amanda’s arm. He pulled her towards him and gave her a kiss on the cheek.
‘Thank you,’ he said with so much sincerity that Amanda couldn’t stop her eyes from welling up too. She paused for a moment to tak
e in his features. His bright blue eyes glistened, the wrinkles on his round face crinkled up and a small smile developed at the corners of his mouth as he looked at her. If hearts could leap from one’s chest, smile and do happy dances, Amanda was certain that’s what hers would be doing right now. Her chest felt fit to burst, she loved this man so much.
‘Grandpa, grazie. I’m so excited. I think I finally have it all up here now,’ she said, knocking her knuckles against her forehead. She then wrapped her arms around his waist and squeezed him tight. ‘Come on, let’s go and sit in the living room and have a break.’
Before they could leave the kitchen, Grandpa did his usual check. Deep down, Amanda knew he didn’t doubt her knowledge in the kitchen, but at the same time she was aware that Grandpa liked being thorough. He loved teaching her and repeating the steps to every recipe numerous times and she loved learning from him and could listen to those steps every time he repeated them.
‘It will take about …’ Grandpa started.
‘… an hour,’ Amanda finished. Both were looking at the oven door.
‘Ah, you know.’ Grandpa’s face lit up as he said this. He nodded and walked in the direction of the front room to join the others. He had his arms outstretched, touching the walls as he walked. They were his guide now; he didn’t quite trust his failing eyesight. His shoulders were hunched from years bent over the kitchen counters and his legs wobbled delicately with each step he took.
Amanda puffed out her chest. She loved the feeling of making her grandpa proud. Then she subtly walked behind him, his shaking legs making her anxious that he would fall. They had been in the kitchen for the better part of an hour, making pizza dough. At ninety-five years old that was no mean feat. You still couldn’t get him out of the kitchen when he had his heart set on cooking. These days, however, he knew when to stop and rest, when his legs couldn’t take his weight much longer and no amount of his determination and strong will could hold off the aches and pains.