Gracie

by Marie Maxwell

  ‘I know.’ Ruby smiled. ‘I tell you what, you go upstairs for a break, I’ll keep an eye on Fay. I’ve got a mountain of paperwork to do …’

  As she spoke, Johnnie knocked on the door. ‘Am I interrupting?’

  ‘No, I was just leaving.’ Gracie smiled.

  She went up to the flat, kicked her shoes off and curled her legs up on the sofa.

  Then she took the letters Ruby had given her out of her pocket.

  She read the one addressed to Ruby first and then looked at the envelope addressed to her, knowing that once she let the genie out the bottle there would be no putting it back.

  As Gracie looked at it, she felt a surge of guilt over Sean. Even though she had been faithful, she had betrayed him in so many ways. She hadn’t been honest about her past and she had married him knowing that she had feelings for someone else that she hadn’t explored.

  TWENTY-THREE

  Saffron Walden

  Edward Woodfield looked up from his newspaper and smiled at his sister-in-law, who had just joined him at the table.

  ‘Good morning, Louisa. Nice day, isn’t it?’

  ‘I hope it stays like this. I need to do some sunbathing – I’m looking so pasty and wan. We should all be down in the South of France with Ma and Pa.’

  ‘If you can persuade Harry, then good for you – he’s not really a sun person …’

  ‘Then we have to educate him. Could you pass the toast, please?’

  Edward smiled at her and passed the toast rack with a flourish.

  ‘Now you’re captive, I have a question for you. I was wondering about it last night. Do you know what happened to my car after the accident?’

  ‘Ooooh, that’s a random question out of the blue, the car …’

  ‘I know. I’ve only really just thought about it, it’s been a strange old year! Did Pa send it to the scrap yard? I loved that car, not to mention my favourite tweed jacket that was on the back seat!’

  ‘I don’t know. I think the car was dragged up here by one of Pa’s tractors and dumped in the old stables, but I don’t know if it’s still there. Your things were bundled up into a case and, I think, put into your room but there was a lot of blood so the jolly old jacket may have had its day.’

  ‘I’ll have to go and take a look. Do you think the car was past redemption?’

  ‘I didn’t see it but it was really smashed up from what I heard. You rammed it to smithereens! That poor old tree will take yonks to recover, but it’s still there as far as I know. I bet Hooper will be able to tell you all about it, he knows everything. Do you want me to ask him?’

  ‘No, it’s really not important, I was just ruminating over things, remembering the last time I drove the poor old dear.’

  They were sitting out on the patio of the house in Saffron Walden. Edward and Harry’s parents were both away in France and Harry had already finished his breakfast and gone off to check the tennis court, ready for a game with his wife.

  ‘I guessed you’d been thinking about the accident,’ Louisa said sympathetically. ‘You were really shouting out in your sleep last night as if you were reliving it. We heard you as we went to bed. Do you remember what you were dreaming about?’

  ‘No. How would I? I was asleep,’ Edward’s tone was sharp but he smiled nonetheless.

  Over time he’d learnt to accept Louisa and her forthright approach to everything. She was never subtle but she was never phoney either and she had been a good friend and support to him since the accident. Edward appreciated it, but every so often, when she was in full flow, he just wanted to run away and hide from her directness He had always found it difficult to discuss anything personal.

  ‘Well, I know that, you old silly, but sometimes we remember our dreams and nightmares the next day,’ she smiled patiently. ‘But you sounded so distraught. I listened outside your door in case you were in trouble but you calmed down again. Harry said you’re bound to still have nightmares after everything you went through …’

  Edward shook his head. ‘Harry understands, does he? I doubt it …’

  ‘Don’t be so mean about your brother!’ Louisa wagged an index finger at him. ‘Harry was worried sick about you after the accident, as were we all. You nearly died. Now get back to your newspaper and don’t be such an old misery-guts. The sooner you get yourself back to the wilds of Africa, the better!’ She slapped his hand playfully, making Edward laugh.

  ‘You’ve become such a tormenting little sister. I really don’t know how Harry puts up with you.’

  ‘Because he loves me of course, and he also loves you, so don’t you forget it!’

  After the car accident it had been ten days before Edward Woodfield had come out of the coma, and then many months of rehabilitation to recover physically from the injuries. The metal plate in his head and the pins in his leg still caused him discomfort, but the agonising pains he had suffered in the aftermath of surgery had finally gone.

  However the scar that ran across his face was a much more permanent reminder of the accident that nearly cost him his life, because every time he looked in the mirror it was the first thing he saw, even though he’d grown a full beard and moustache to cover most of it. He wasn’t sure how he’d cope with so much facial hair when he went back to the climate of Africa but in the meantime he felt happier with his face covered.

  As well as disguising his facial scars he had adjusted his way of walking to accommodate his slight limp and the scars on his legs and chest from both the accident and the surgery were hidden out of sight when he was dressed. One of the worst things for him during his recovery had been the kindly words and patronising head patting from all and sundry. They meant well but Edward found his dependency excruciatingly embarrassing.

  During his time convalescing he had sat around a lot and put on weight. His face had filled out and his belt had been let out a couple of notches but he didn’t mind too much about that, he knew once he was active again and back in the equatorial heat he would soon get back to normal.

  He was aware how fortunate he was that his family had ensured he had the best private medical and nursing care, because without it he may well have lost a leg, if not his life. He was grateful he was alive and functioning, but a year on and he was going crazy in the family home; hence declaring himself fit and well, and ready to go back to West Africa.

  The sprawling country house in Saffron Walden was not only home to his parents but also to Harry and Louisa. The shape of the building meant it naturally divided into three sections and the family made the most of that, with the parents having the accommodation at one end, Harry and Louisa at the other, and Edward in the smaller mid-section.

  When everyone was in residence they would eat together as a family and socialise in the drawing room and the gardens, but apart from that they all respected each other’s space even though there were no formal boundaries.

  There was also a cottage in the grounds, where Mrs Hooper the housekeeper and her husband lived. The middle-aged couple had worked for the Woodfields since before the war and between them did everything to keep the whole property, inside and out, in good working order.

  Edward’s parents and brother were horrified at the thought of him going back to Africa but he was determined to return and get on with his life as soon as possible. He loved his job but it was also the easy, outdoor lifestyle which he missed. He often thought affectionately about the large colonial house he had shared with two other engineers, Paulo who was Italian and Olivier, a Frenchman. They were all single men of a similar age who worked for the same company and they got on well together as housemates, despite being different nationalities. It was a good life but one he could lose if he wasn’t cleared fit to return at his company medical examination.

  The company had contacted him the previous week to ask after his health and to tell him that his job was still open and so was his accommodation, but not for long. His temporary stand-in was due to return to England and if Edward wasn’t fully fit then the
posting would have to be filled by someone else.

  He had to get back soon if he wanted to keep his job but he also wanted to do so. ‘Joking aside, Louisa, I’m ready to go. This has been a long hard road for everyone and it’s time we all got back to some sort of normality,’ Edward said.

  ‘Oh, Teddy darling, I’ll hate to see you go back to Africa but I know you want to. How will you get on if you need any healthcare while you’re there? Is the company okay about your accident?’

  ‘They are so short of qualified people wanting to work there they’re actually trying to get me back as soon as possible – I just have to be checked over. And anyway, I’ve recovered as much as I’m ever going to: I’m almost back to normal. It’ll be okay and it’s the best thing for me. I’m going nuts here, no offence of course!’

  ‘None taken, my darling brother-in-law, none taken!’ Louisa laughed. She walked to the back of his chair and ruffled his hair. ‘Now, I’m off to get changed for a game of tennis with Harry. Do you want me to check on your car? I’m sure I can find out about it from Hooper. Knowing him, he’s probably put it back together again in his spare time.’

  Once again Edward felt bad that he had doubted Louisa because she had been a real friend to him during his difficult convalescence. She had welcomed him being a disabled best man in a wheelchair, and was forever popping over from their side of the house to sit and chat with him. His parents and Harry floated about as happily as they always had, but it was Louisa who had been his greatest support and Edward had eventually realised that she was really a very pleasant and knowledgeable young woman, who genuinely loved Harry despite his lack of focus or ambition.

  Despite the passage of time, Edward still couldn’t quite get his thoughts away from Gracie. During the darkest moments in the early days of his recovery, he would wake in the night and see her standing at the end of his bed in her wedding dress, looking at him.

  He knew it was the madness of painkillers making him hallucinate but in a strange way he missed it when the images of Gracie went away and were replaced by nightmares of the crash itself.

  Edward still didn’t remember much about the accident or the immediate aftermath, but he did know why he had lost concentration. He had gone to Southend and seen Gracie McCabe get married, and then driven home at speed. He remembered racing along, going faster and faster… . .

  When he had first come out of the coma he had remembered nothing about the accident or the few days either side of it, but as he recovered things came back to him slowly, and as each day passed he remembered something else; mostly little things but he was getting there.

  But no matter how hard he tried he couldn’t stop thinking about Gracie McCabe. Something was niggling at him, something tucked away in his memory he couldn’t grasp. No matter how hard he tried, he just couldn’t remember.

  He was still deep in thought when Louisa bounced back out into the garden, dressed in her tennis whites and sporting a couple of racquets.

  ‘Righty ho, I’m off to the courts, are you coming to watch?’

  ‘Not a chance!’ Edward laughed. ‘I’ve decided I’m going to find Hooper and find out about the car and my belongings. I can’t even remember what was in there … Maybe just a few items in the glove box …’

  ‘Oh, talking about that, I’ve just remembered something; I know you were still in hospital and Pa said there was a letter amid all the debris in the car. He posted it for you …’

  The letter. Edward had completely forgotten the letter he had written to Gracie and addressed to the Thamesview. He had decided against posting it and then he had crashed his car …

  ‘Did you see the letter?’ he asked, as casually as he could.

  ‘No, but Pa said it was addressed to a hotel on the coast. I think he thought you were planning a dirty weekend with someone. You know what Pa’s like, he was quite impressed.’ She winked as she laughed. ‘I don’t know why he posted it, probably because it helped to do normal things when everyone was so worried about you.’

  ‘I don’t remember it, so it can’t have been important.’ Edward didn’t look at Louisa.

  ‘I’m sure it wasn’t,’ Louisa said dismissively. ‘Do you want to walk with me if you’re going to search out Hooper?’

  Edward pulled himself up out of the chair. ‘That’s a good idea, I need some exercise.’

  Although he was almost back to normal in everything else, the events surrounding the actual crash were still a mystery to him. He remembered going to Southend; he remembered seeing Gracie at her wedding but the drive home was a foggy blur.

  He thought about the letter and tried to remember what he’d written but it wouldn’t formulate in his mind so he dismissed it, knowing from experience that it was the best way for all the snippets of memories to return.

  The old stable block on the edge of the property was no longer in use so it had become Hooper’s enclave, a place where he stored all the garden equipment and his tools, but it was also a haven for him; it was his own great big personal potting shed.

  Edward could sense his reluctance to let anyone else inside his territory but he wanted to see the wreckage of his car. He hoped it would jog his memory about the reason for the accident.

  ‘It’s in here, Mr Edward,’ the man said. ‘We brought it up and it’s not been touched apart from hosing the blood off. Nasty accident it was hitting that tree, not like you at all, what with you normally being the sensible one …’

  Edward smiled. ‘I know. I’ve got the scars to prove it!’

  He had been expecting a wreck, but when Hooper pulled the tarpaulin back he gasped out loud. His beloved MG was barely recognisable as a car at all; but it wasn’t that which shocked him. It was the realisation that it was a miracle he had survived at all. As he looked at it, he couldn’t quite believe how he had lived.

  He walked around the mangled wreckage, staring at every part of it, touching it almost reverently and remembering.

  ‘Oh my dear lord, Hooper, how did I ever survive that? Someone was certainly watching over me that day …’

  ‘Yes sir,’ Hooper said. ‘You used up one of your lives that day, now you have to make the most of the others.’

  ‘You’re right, I was incredibly lucky.’ He patted the man on the shoulder. ‘And now we have to get rid of this reminder. If you can make use of any of the parts, please do, and then arrange for it to be disposed of. I’ve seen and remembered all I need to.’

  For the first time since he was a small boy Edward Woodfield could feel tears welling up in his eyes. He blinked rapidly and turned away from Hooper, who was still shaking his head at the wreckage.

  As he walked out into the sunshine he heard laughter so he walked back across the grounds and stood under the cover of a tree watching Louisa and Harry running around the tennis court. He watched for a while and then headed back to the house. The weight had been lifted, the last memory recalled and it was time for him to put Gracie McCabe right out of his mind and get on with the life he had been given back.

  TWENTY-FOUR

  ‘Hello girls, did you have a good journey? Oh, it’s so nice to see you both again!’ Babs Wheaton was standing on the garden path as Gracie and Ruby got out of the car. She held out her arms for a hug.

  ‘Oh, and you too, Aunty Babs, it’s been too long …’ Ruby said, rushing forward to hug the woman who had been a second mother to her since the day they met, when she was a ten-year-old evacuee during the war and was billeted with the Wheatons.

  ‘How are you, Gracie? And Fay, where is she?’ she asked Gracie as she looked towards the car.

  ‘In her carrycot in the back, I’ll just get her out,’ Gracie said. ‘She’s slept all the way – I think the long drive soothed her, or else she was bored.’

  Babs Wheaton peered into the carrycot. ‘Oh bless her, she’s beautiful! Now in you all come. I know you said not to, but I’ve laid out just a little spread for you. Very little, I promise, and I’ve got presents here for Fay, just a few little bi
ts.’

  The woman laughed and held her thumb and forefinger apart to indicate something very small.

  ‘Oh God, that means the full Wheaton buffet and the table heaving under the weight of food and gifts, doesn’t it?’ Ruby laughed.

  ‘Well, you’ve had a long drive, you’re bound to be hungry and there’ll be five of us to eat it. Six, if we count Fay.’

  Gracie took the metal transporter out of the boot, unfolded it and carefully placed the carrycot onto it. ‘She’s still asleep so we may just get time to catch up before she needs feeding. She does cry a lot, so be prepared.’

  ‘I think they all do that. She’ll grow out of it soon enough, Maggie certainly did.’

  ‘Is Maggie here?’ Ruby asked as she looked around.

  ‘No, but she will be. She’s gone down to the vicarage with George. I thought it would be nice for us to chat for a bit before she flies in like the proverbial whirlwind and dominates the conversation. She’s such a chatterbox now and so very clever. She’s doing really well at school.’

  Although they were not related Babs and Ruby looked as if they could be mother and daughter. Both were tall and slender, with straight-backed confidence, striking colouring and quick smiles. All the time Ruby had suffered problems with her real mother and her errant brothers, Babs and George Wheaton had been there to pick up the pieces. It was having the love and support of the Wheatons that had enabled her to broker the peace and rebuild her relationship with her own estranged family. And now the couple were offering help and support to Gracie at a time when she really needed it.

  The three women walked up the path to the back door of the house, which was also the doctor’s surgery, and went straight into the kitchen. As Gracie wheeled the carrycot into a quiet corner behind the door, Babs turned up the heat under the kettle, then all three sat down at the well-worn farmhouse table which had been the venue for so many of the traumas in Ruby’s life.

  Gracie sensed the emotion rising in her friend and touched her hand in support. She knew it was always difficult for her in the build-up to seeing Maggie, her daughter. It was hard and emotional but something that Ruby had to bear for her daughter’s sake in the long run.