Secrets We Keep

by B. K. Leigh

  Killian: I’ve wanted to taste that pussy since the first night I saw you… And you bet your ass I’ll be tasting it much sooner rather than later.

  I tell her with brazen conviction. I watch as she lights up in a deep blush. The perfect shade of bright red ignites all over her skin causing me to want to run my tongue along every square inch.

  Tatum: Killian…

  I can see her squeezing her thighs together beneath the wooden desk that does nothing to hide the small movement.

  Killian: You wet, sweetheart?

  I ask her already knowing the answer to that question.

  Tatum: You can’t say things like that.

  She ignores my question completely, but I can’t let it drop that easily.

  Killian: I asked you a question, Tatum. Or should I come and see for myself?

  She looks as if she may come undone the second she reads my next text. Her eyes are hooded and glossy. I know if I were to do exactly what I threatened she’d be soaking wet.

  Tatum: Maybe I want you to.

  She raises her small hand in the air, and I arch a brow in her direction.

  “Yes, Miss O’Neil?” I call on her, my voice startling a few of the other students.

  “Can I ask you a question about one of these?” She points her pencil to the exam in front of her. I know it’s just a ruse to get me to go to her, and I gladly oblige. A hand full of eyes all land on my sudden movement but quickly go back to their tests.

  “I’ll be right there. No wondering eyes.” I send a stern warning to the rest of the students. She doesn’t realize she’s fighting fire with fire. I adjust the growing bulge in my slacks and stand up from my desk. I walk all the way back until I’m in front of her desk. My back shielding us from the rest of the students.

  “What can I help you with?” I ask her with as much professionalism as I can muster. I squat down so my torso is the same height as hers. I wait for her to answer as I slide my right hand over her tight black leggings. Her breath hitches in her throat catching all the words she was just about to say.

  “I-um-” She mumbles as my hand travels further and further into forbidden territory. For a second I forget where I am and the sudden urge to rip her clothes off overwhelms me completely, but I’m suddenly reminded when a cough sounds from somewhere else in the room. “I just wanted.” My thumb grazes over her pussy constricting the words in her throat. “To-”

  “Wanted to what?” Now I’m the one playing with fire. I can feel her wetness growing beneath the thin black fabric. My thumb begins to rub lazy circles directly over her hiding clit.

  “Killian.” She mouths my name, and I swear it was like lighting a match and throwing it into a barrel of gasoline.

  “Can you explain this to me?” She’s finally managed to find her words. Her thighs tighten around my hand as I continue to rub her aching mound. As I explain the question to her in deeper detail I can feel her body heightening. Her legs are close to shaking. Her cheeks are stained pink, and her pussy is pulsating against my touch. As my words continue to flow I bring her to climax, raising my voice a little higher to cancel out her heavy panting and deep breaths. Her climax is beautiful. Her soft moans only loud enough for me to hear, are like music to my ears. She makes me want to do things I’ve never done before. Bad things. Illicit things. If we were in a different place I’d put my mouth against her and suck until she was drained, but we’re not and I have to control myself.

  “Does that help?” I ask her with restraint in my voice knowing my question has a double meaning. She’s still so lost in her recent orgasm she can’t even form words. She nods her head instead. Her hooded lashes just barely coming into contact with my eyes. They’re sparkling. The just fucked look looks great on her. It makes me want to go complete caveman on her, tear her away and claim what I know is already mine. Finally I pull my hand away from her aching pussy and bring my fingers to my lips. They’re soaked with everything Tatum. No amount of fabric could have hidden that orgasm. Her eyes widen as I suck the remnants of her from my fingers before adjusting myself to stand.

  I warned her.

  I want to tell her before walking away.

  She asked for it.

  No, I asked for it, and I’ll be damned if I don’t have her naked and beneath me sooner rather than later.

  Chapter 24

  Tatum

  It’s Christmas eve, and I haven’t seen Killian since class two days ago. I’ve been aching for him, literally. All I’ve thought about since then was the way he managed to control my body entirely. It was like an outer body experience. Once he had his hold on me I willingly gave him all of my control. He was the peer and I was the puppet.

  “Your sister should be here soon.” Grams tells me from her big red recliner.

  “Haley? She’s coming here?” I ask with shock in my voice. I haven’t seen Haley since I spent the summer at her house with Cohen.

  “Do you have any other sisters?” Grams asks me sarcastically.

  “What about this?” I trail my eyes down to my stomach.

  “You’re gonna have to tell her about that.” She deadpans. “And she’s probably going to freak out.” She adds in like a cherry on top of a sundae.

  “Can you?” I practically beg her. “She’s gonna kill me.” My sister is a spitfire with an attitude problem. She’s been distant ever since my parents died. Which is why Grams thought it’d be a good idea to go and spend the summer with her. She thought it’d be a chance to reconnect, but little did she know we had never been more apart than in those few weeks. She spent the entire time ignoring me, doing whatever she could to spend more time away from her home than she needed. I was thankful she agreed to let Cohen come with me. I would have been out of my mind with boredom, and drowning in loneliness without him.

  “You should have thought about that before.” She chastises me.

  “You act like I did it on purpose.” I mutter in annoyance. Okay, so we didn’t use a condom, and I lost my virginity to the first guy I fucked in a night club.

  “Well you didn’t do anything to stop it.” Her eyes are trained on the TV but her words still manage to hit me right where it hurts.

  “I’m gonna go to Cohen’s.” I announce as I stand from the couch. I don’t want to be here for when Haley gets in. It’s going to be a World War all over again. Because even though she still blames me for our parents death, she did take on a sort of mother roll. I have no doubt she’ll react the same way my own mother would have if she had known.

  “Make sure you’re back for dinner.” Grams mumbles while turning up the volume on the TV. I nod my head in agreement. For the first time I wish my sister would just stay put. I wish I could have Bean and not tell her until she’s grown. But I know that’s not even a tiny bit logical. I stop by my room and grab what I need before leaving. I take the small gift wrapped box and stuff it in my front pocket. It’s the perfect gift for Killian, and I’m excited to give it to him.

  The winter air has a bite to it even though there is no snow on the ground to match it’s fierceness. We usually don’t get much snow to begin with so wishing for a white Christmas at this point is useless. Cohen doesn’t live too far from me, but I find myself headed in the opposite direction of his house. I told Grams that’s where I was headed, but as soon as my feet hit the end of my driveway they have a different plan in mind. The streets aren’t as busy as I thought they’d be, and judging by what time it is everyone’s probably settled down inside. My leggings do nothing to protect me from the cold, and Cohen’s sweatshirt barely holds any warmth in. I stop and sit on a bench once I come to the park. The metal is cool beneath me but dulls after a few moments. It’s quiet out here. A place where I can just stop and think. I’m half way through my senior year. Half way through my pregnancy. It’s a scary and exhilarating thought all wrapped in one. I don’t want to feel guilty about it anymore. I don’t want to feel like everyone’s disappointment anymore. I want to celebrate Bean. I want to love her like you s
hould love your child from the very start. I feel like my age and situation has robbed me of that. But I know it’s my fault to begin with. At least half of it.

  “What are you doing out here?” His lips are a centimeter away from my ear causing me to jump as his warm breath hits my cold sensitive skin.

  “Killian!” I jump throwing a hand on my chest. “What the hell are you doing here?” I arch a brow in his direction.

  “I saw you sitting here.” he shrugs. “Couldn’t miss this sweatshirt from a mile away.” He jokes. I laugh at that. It’s one of Cohen’s favorite sweatshirts. I only wanted to steal it because it was one of my favorite colors, yellow.

  “You scared me.” I admit. He comes around the front of the bench and plops his butt down next to mine. His thigh rubs against mine radiating warmth, making me want to snuggle closer.

  “You want to tell me why you’re sitting out here in the freezing cold?” His warm eyes connect with mine and I swear it’s enough for me to end up in a puddle at his feet.

  “I just needed some air.” I let out a shaky breath.

  “You’re like four miles from home.” He chuckles lightheartedly.

  “I know.” He pulls my hand from my pocket and wraps his fingers around mine. “What’s wrong?” He nudges me.

  “It’s nothing.” I blow it off.

  “Tell me.” He pries. One look into those baby blues and I’m done for.

  “My sister’s coming home.” I let out a deep sigh. I can feel my face fall as the sadness begins to creep in.

  “And this is bad because...” He waits for me to finish. I take a moment to prepare myself before answering.

  “She still blames me for my parents death.” Admitting that to him is like having a weight lifted from my shoulders.

  “You want to go somewhere?” He asks surprising me. I don’t remind him that not too many places are open on Christmas Eve, but I agree anyway.

  ∞∞∞

  Killian’s car is warm and cozy as we drive down the long and winding road. His fingers still cling to mine as they rest on the center console between us. I haven’t said another word to him since we left the park, and we’ve been driving for about a half hour. We’re only one town over before we turn down what looks like another road but is really just the worlds longest driveway. It leads to a giant white farm house with an even bigger red barn in the back. There’s a wraparound farmers porch clinging to the front, and a swing blowing lightly in the winter wind all the way towards the end.

  “What is this?” I ask him as I stare at the masterpiece before me. It’s like something you’d see from a movie. There’s even a three sixty view of the prettiest sprawling green fields. It’s everything I’ve ever wanted and more. Something I grew up wishing I’d get the chance to have. “Where are we?” I ask again. My chucks crunch into the gravel driveway.

  “It’s my home.” Killian shrugs his shoulders modestly. “I take it you like it?” He asks me shyly.

  “Like it?” I stare at him in disbelief. “This is the most magnificent house I’ve ever seen.” I tell him in awe. It truly is. My parents house was a modern two-story home in the middle of a crowded neighborhood where houses were stacked on top of each other. There was no such thing as yards or privacy. After living there for most of my life this is something I always vied for. It’s not like I’m ungrateful for what my parents provided me with, or what my Grams has now, but you do grow up with an idea in your head of how you want your own house to look like. And this is definitely it.

  “It’s just a house.” He down plays it. I watch as he walks around the hood of the car and directly towards me. “Wait until you see the inside.” He wiggles his eyebrows and takes my hand pulling me closely behind him. The inside is just as amazing as the exterior. I run my fingertips over the fine craftsmanship.

  “Did you do this?” I pin him with an intense gaze. Please say yes. Please say yes.

  “I may have had a little too much time on my hands over the summer.” He jokes. “But yes, everything from the ground up has been restored and refurbished.” He’s being so modest. So humble. If this were my place I’d be bragging about it from one side of town to the other.

  “This is insane.” I tell him as I eye the hand carved railings. I pry my attention away from that and focus more on the decor of the house. It’s masculine and modern with just the slightest hint of a woman's touch.

  “My mother.” He gives me an answer I didn’t even ask the question to yet. The colors she chose remind me of her house. The light teals and soft blues are a perfect combo. “Do you want something to eat?” He asks as I explore my surroundings. I can’t help but touch everything around me.

  “No, I’m fine.” I ignore his stare as I keep my eyes on everything but him.

  “You want to talk about it?” I have no doubt he’s referring to our earlier conversation. A conversation I had hoped he would have dropped.

  “Do I have to?”

  “No.” His shoulders drop an inch. “But I’d like you to.” He walks over to me and grabs onto my hips, digging his nails into the sensitive flesh. “I want you to start trusting me.” He leans down until his forehead is flush against mine.

  “I do.” I tilt my head up at just the right angle to where my lips reach just below his. I’m not lying to him when I say I do. Somehow, someway, he’s managed to get beyond the concrete walls I had built up around my heart. “I love you.” I word vomit. The words feel sticky against my throat and I begin to wonder if it’s even the right time to say them to him at all. I know what I’ve been feeling for a long time now. I know what he’s told me before, but it’s never been straight forward. It’s never just been those three words. He takes my lips against his, sliding his tongue between them until he’s granted full access.

  “Come.” He breaks the kiss and pulls me over to a large sofa. I watch his back as he bends to place some logs into the giant fireplace. With a strike of a match it’s radiating heat. The already warm and comfortable home just got one hundred times more cozy. He takes a seat next to me and warps an arm around my shoulders.

  “You can tell me.” He encourages placing a chaste kiss against my lips.

  “Where do I start?” I don’t even know if I’m asking for his advice at this point, or if I just need to hear his voice before I delve into a part of my life I thought I had left buried in the past.

  “The beginning?” He suggests. It takes me a minute to gather my thoughts But eventually I do.

  “Fuck!” Cohen laughs unsteadily beside me. “You’re a wreck.” He takes a sip from the red cup in his hands no doubt containing a lethal amount of hard alcohol.

  “Gimme that!” I reach for the cup but he pulls it away fast. There’s a million other kids swarming around us, packed into this house like a can of sardines. “Cohen!” I pout when he pulls the cup further away from me.

  “You’ve already had like six cups.” He laughs as his words begin to slur.

  “It’s not even twelve yet, that’s barely nothing.” I whine. “Come on, Coco.” I bat my eye lashes at him.

  “Get a room!” Someone shouts at us as they squeeze by our bodies taking up half of the small stairway. I scrunch my brows at the comment. No one ever believes Cohen and I are just friends.

  “Okay, I’ll make a deal with you.” He holds his pinkie out in my direction. “I’ll let you smoke this as long as you don’t drink for the rest of the night.” He has a wicked glimmer in his eyes. It’s a tough bargain, but right now all I can focus on is the high I know I’m going to feel as soon as that harsh smoke hits my lungs.

  “Fine!” I grab for the blunt he’s holding out.

  “Nope, you gotta pinkie promise me first.” He teases pulling it out of my reach.

  “Fine, I pinkie promise.” I wrap my pinkie around his.

  “Wait! There’s more.” He adds in at the last minute. My shoulders drop waiting for him to finish whatever it is he’s about to tell me.”You gotta make sure you don’t go anywhere without
me tonight.” His eyes travel around through the other party goers. I smile a sloppy smile at his protectiveness. “I’m serious, Tate.” His face turns into a statue as he waits for me to agree.

  “I won’t go anywhere without you.” I promise him knowing he needs to hear the words himself. Cohen’s like my own personal body guard when it comes to parties. As long as he’s around I know nothing bad can happen to me.

  “Fine.” He takes a lighter and lights the end of the blunt sucking in until red embers begin to glow and grow further up the stem. “Here.” He passes it to me once he’s done.

  “Mmm.” I sigh as soon as the smoke hits my lungs. Weed mixed with alcohol probably isn’t a good idea, but I do it anyway. I smile at my best friend as the high creeps its way into my body. He raises his hand to take the blunt from me but tucks a stray curl behind my ear instead.

  “I love you, Coco.” I say as I start to relax.

  “I love you too, Tate.” We pass the blunt back and forth until all that’s left is the roach. It’s as if we’re in our own world. A haze takes over us, making our limbs numb and our heads empty of all logical thoughts.

  “I think I have cotton mouth.” He laughs after a few moments of keeping to himself.

  “I don’t even think I can swallow.” I laugh as I try and force the words from my dry throat. “That’s the strongest weed you’ve ever given me.” I tell him with a smile on my face and a sticky tongue.

  “I paid a lot of money for it.” He chokes out. “Let’s go get some drinks.” He wiggles his eyebrows and pulls me to my feet. We push through what seems like hundreds of other students. Some are drinking, some are dancing, almost all of them are fucked up in some sort of way.

  “This is wild.” I smile as we finally make it into the kitchen. We’ve been to plenty of parties before but nothing to this magnitude. We’re celebrating.