Naughty Little Secret

by Shayla Black

  She sucked in a harsh breath. How did she answer him? Put her feelings into words? She could hardly sort through the tangle in her head.

  At Noah’s belt, his cell phone rang, shattering the quiet intimacy of the moment. He swore in an ugly four-letter word that told her in one succinct syllable the depth of his frustration.

  At the moment, she didn’t disagree.

  “I think you mean it today. Tomorrow…?” She sighed and shook her head. “Let’s not put ourselves through this.”

  Noah turned off the ringer without looking at the caller ID even once, something else Tim would never have done. He focused on her. Nothing but her.

  He sighed and nodded, both heavy with resignation. “If that’s what you want. But I do, you know. Love you. No matter what you think, I always will.”

  * * * *

  “He what?” Kat screeched through Lauren’s car speakers.

  Lauren sighed as she navigated through dicey traffic on Central Expressway as she left downtown Dallas. “Don’t make me repeat it all because I know you heard me. The CliffsNotes version is that Noah was Mr. Mysterious. And there is no other woman. He was just pumping me for information. He lied to me about the whole thing.”

  “All this happened two weeks ago and you’re just now telling me?”

  “I was trying to figure it all out in my head. Sorry. What am I supposed to make of it? On the one hand, I felt lied to and manipulated…and even though it’s probably stupid, oddly flattered. On the other hand, I just don’t see him as a suburban husband and father, not when he’s used to a new model every month. But what if he really does mean it?”

  Kat hesitated. “He said he did all this because he loves you.”

  “Yes.”

  “And that doesn’t faze you at all?”

  “You mean like make me ooey-gooey inside? A little.” Okay, a lot.

  “But you don’t believe him?”

  “I don’t know what to believe. But even if he does, given half the chance, Noah would barge into my life with all the subtlety of the bulls charging at Pamplona. He plans everything, and that would include my life.”

  “No offense, hon, but you could use a little help in the planning department. You don’t even make plans for Christmas until the week before. Maybe you could…um…balance each other out.”

  “Kat…”

  “I’m being serious. Is that really your hang-up here? His planning fetish?”

  The way Noah did things, all dominant male, take-charge attitude, turned her on. A lot. She got wet just thinking about the sensual plans he had made when he seduced her, his elaborate plans to drive her to the edge of her self-control and push her over while she screamed his name. That totally turned her on. Everything about him did…except when he was lying.

  “No, that’s not my biggest fear. He’d plan stuff in my life, yes. And maybe I could use that, provided he wasn’t lying. But how would I pick up the pieces after he planned the seduction of his next girlfriend?”

  Kat sighed. “Okay, look at this objectively. He lied. That’s a pisser, but he didn’t do it to hurt you. He did it to win you.”

  “That’s his side of the story.”

  “Why would he lie about that? Noah might have a reputation for being a playboy, but he’s never been a deceitful jerk. He must have known how anti-relationship you’ve become. If he loves you and wants to marry you, what sort of options did that leave him? Sounds like he was desperate for a way to convince you to see him as your lover.”

  “You’re taking his side?” Lauren felt her jaw drop. Wasn’t Kat her sister? Didn’t blood give her some advantage here?

  “Just think about his choices before you get all high and mighty. You wanted him, but you were willing to let it go, right?”

  “Yeah. It was awkward. He’s my boss and Tim’s friend and… It seemed like there were too many obstacles. I didn’t think he’d be interested, and I didn’t want to be hurt.”

  “Noah wanted you so much, he worked around awkward, got up off his ass, and put himself on the line to be with you. He risked his pride and his pain to lay his heart at your feet. Think of everything this man did to get your attention, just to touch you…”

  Lauren had thought of it. Repeatedly. The reality swam in her head, drowning out anger, leaving her with nothing but a hollow ache. Giving in…it was so tempting. With a few words, she could have that amazing man in her bed, his eyes gleaming blue fire, charged by wicked lust.

  But… “That doesn’t excuse lying.”

  Kat scoffed. “It goes a long way. Stop being righteous. You hate the fact he was more clever and outmaneuvered you. But his lying isn’t really the issue.”

  Frowning, Lauren gripped her steering wheel, wishing for a moment it was her sister’s neck. “Maybe not, but—”

  “You’re scared of the lengths he’d go to in order to win you.”

  “A little,” she admitted. “It’s like a terrifying thrill ride.”

  “I’m sure, but I think the thing that’s really got your panties in a twist is the fact he’s making you confront your fears about the future. You’re afraid that if you give him your heart, he’ll leave you someday.”

  In stop-and-go traffic, Lauren stopped and chewed on a ragged nail. An uncomfortable resonance in her brain and tightness in her stomach told her that her younger sister was right.

  Discomfort at facing those very fears warred with guilt in her belly. She’d rejected an, intelligent man with deliciously sexy intentions to avoid facing her own demons. She’d hurt him, desolated him, if she could believe his expression after this morning’s meeting.

  Damn, she felt like a coward. But that didn’t make the fear go away.

  “Bitch. I hate that you know me so well. So what are you suggesting?”

  “Get over this little tantrum before you piss away the best thing that’s ever happened to you.”

  “The best thing? You never liked Tim.”

  “With good reason. Look, you divorced the bastard because he never paid a lick of attention to you. Now, you have a man willing to blanket you with affection, devote night after night to your happiness and pleasure. And you say you’re pissed about the way he approached you. Besides being way too picky, you’re lying to yourself and letting your fear control you.”

  “Gosh, Kat. Don’t mince words. Tell me what you really think.”

  Her sister just snorted. “Stop thinking less about how a new relationship might be painful and think more about what kind of happiness you might be passing up if you let the pain in your past rule your future.”

  Kat’s cutting voice—and the truth—whacked her across the face. Her sister was right. Noah was the anti-Tim—supportive, attentive, able to focus on their relationship. There was just one little, D-cup-or-better problem…

  “Okay, you’re mostly right. But there’s something else you don’t understand.”

  “This better be good.”

  “Seriously, Kat. I’m like…Mount Everest to him. It’s the challenge, not the person. Once he’s scaled me and planted his flag, it’ll be over.”

  “Sounds to me like he’s already planted his flag more than once.”

  Lauren rolled her eyes. “Stop. I meant metaphorically.”

  “You think he’s so hard up that he needs to ruin a decades-long friendship just to get laid?”

  Um, put like that? Well…no. That didn’t seem Noah’s style. But…

  “Kat, I’ve watched him with every other woman he’s dated. I’ve seen the same pattern over and over. Once he thinks he’s got me, he’ll be bored and restless and leave me. Knowing that, it’s hard to just ‘get over’ my fear.”

  “You need to consider three things: A—He acted that way with other women he used as a substitute for you. If he’s pined for ten years, chances are cupid has maimed him for life where you’re concerned. B— Your hurt yourself when you cut him loose because—get this—you’re afraid of hurting. Hello, is logic home?”

  “Kat—”


  “Don’t interrupt. C—You’re looking for guarantees in a relationship before you sign on. Gee, if they all come with one and I didn’t know…color me stupid. Here I thought relationships were about learning to trust and respect one another, sticking it out in good times and bad, and hoping for the best along the way. But gosh, if they come with guarantees of not being cheated on and left, I’ll take that.”

  “Now you’re just being sarcastic.”

  “I’m being right. I’m also hanging up now. Before you get the kids and get busy, while I know you’re stuck in traffic and have nothing else to do, I want you to think about what I said. Noah loves you. I believe the guy. Why shouldn’t you? You’re crazy about him. It’s a great chance to start all over and do things right. The future… Well, what’s that cliché? It’s better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all? I think that applies here. Gotta run. Ta ta…”

  Click.

  Ugh! That was just like her difficult, opinionated sister.

  God bless her. Tears seared the backs of Lauren’s sleep-deprived eyes as she mentally sorted through Kat’s words.

  Noah loved her. Lauren couldn’t run from that fact anymore. Instead, an insidious part of her heart embraced it like a warm quilt on a chilly winter’s day.

  She loved Noah. They knew each other well, respected each other’s senses of humor and quirks. Undoubtedly, he’d drive her nuts a time or two along the way. No doubt she’d do the same to him.

  Cutting him out of her life now…it was crazy. The weeks without him were killing her, like a dull, rusty blade in her chest coming closer and closer to destroying her heart. She didn’t want to be without him. If their relationship ended up being a short one, well, at least she’d have memories and the knowledge that she’d really tried. If she left him now, she’d have nothing but regrets.

  Lauren already had plenty of those, and they sucked. She wasn’t settling for regrets anymore.

  When the traffic stopped again, she prowled through her phone’s menu and hit one of her speed dial buttons. The call connected over the car’s speakers. “Hey, Mom. Are you busy tonight? You’re not? Great! Would you mind if the girls came to stay with you? I need to visit a…friend.”

  Chapter Twelve

  Friday fucking night, and he was alone. And home by ten thirty. How the hell had it happened?

  When a certain dark blonde with flashing brown eyes had let him into her life—into the sweet, honey-wet depths of her body—substitutes had ceased to work.

  She’d captured him completely, without even trying. She had simply been herself, and for ten years, he’d ached for no one else. After a brief week in paradise, Lauren had kicked him out. Largely his fault, yes. But she’d bashed in his heart and snipped his balls when she’d walked out the proverbial door. He’d started a million plans in his head to win Lauren back before he had to remind himself scheming was exactly what she didn’t want. Damn it.

  God knew he wasn’t lacking other offers. Just tonight at his former hot spot, some young blonde had all but humped his leg like a puppy in heat. In the past, he’d been able to muster up enough interest, especially if the blonde had lush curves and chocolate eyes and a husky laugh that went straight to his cock. Like Lauren.

  Now…nothing. He’d danced with the blonde tonight, knowing he’d have to get back in the game at some point. He’d tried to pep talk himself into sleeping with her. Nothing doing. Holding the woman—Jessica? He couldn’t remember—everything south of his belt buckle may as well have been dead. Tonight’s blonde had been too skinny, too young, too…loud and obvious. Self-absorbed. Misty had been much the same. As had a long line of blondes before her.

  Noah sighed as he let himself into his huge, rambling, terribly empty house. Lauren was gone—and not coming back. He’d have to sell the house. Why did a bachelor need four bedrooms and three baths? The wife and kids he’d wanted for a decade weren’t moving in anytime soon.

  On that depressing note, Noah felt his way through the dark, into his living room and made his way down the hall.

  Bed. He’d go to bed. And probably jack off. Again. Thinking about Lauren, her supple curves all spread out on his bed, bound and wet and ready and all his.

  Now he got a reaction from parts south. Sighing, Noah looked down at his stirring cock and shook his head. Jessica and her artificial D-cups rubbing against him had done nothing. One thought of Lauren and every inch he’d sworn was dead suddenly sprang back to life.

  “Picky bastard,” he muttered to his dick as he approached his bedroom.

  The door was closed. Odd. He never closed his bedroom door before leaving the house. It only made the room stuffy…

  But he was running on next to no sleep, and the pressure building up in his balls was nearly enough to strangle him. That, coupled with the constant ache right between his pecs, was really distracting the hell out of him.

  Tired, Noah groped for the knob and found a piece of paper taped to it.

  Scowling, he pulled the paper free. What the…? Had someone been in his house? Who had keys? Mom. His administrative assistant, Jennifer. He couldn’t see either of them leaving a note taped to his door, rather than leaving a voice mail.

  After flipping on the light in the hall, he unfolded the paper and read…

  You. Me. Naked skin. Shared fantasies. A whole night.

  Now.

  His heart dead stopped. Those were the same seductive words he’d used, more or less. The note wasn’t written in his handwriting.

  It was in Lauren’s.

  Holding his breath, he shoved the door to his bedroom wide open.

  His jaw dropped at the sight that greeted him. His cock leapt to full attention.

  Lauren stretched out on his bed. Ankles and one wrist bound. Writhing like she needed him to ease her ache. Holy shit.

  She was here? Here! Breathe, he admonished himself. Goddamn breathe.

  Her hair tangled in a wild honey-sweet cloud, teasing her neck, toying with the swells of her breasts and her swollen rosy nipples. She was blessedly, beautifully naked…except for a little black mask. Golden candlelight bathed every seductive valley and ripe swell, every inch of her soft, sun-kissed skin. Son of a… Wow!

  Legs spread, Lauren’s bare sex glistened for his gaze. Advertising. Alluring. Calling out to him. His fingers, mouth, and cock all twitched with the urge to answer. Fucking torture…

  “Hi, stranger.”

  Her voice, sultry, thick with arousal, wrapped around his cock, stroking it to a painful turgidity. Noah gritted his teeth and tried to make his brain work, to sort through why she might be here, naked and available, taunting and so fucking gorgeous. But his brain wasn’t firing at all. It just registered naked Lauren and reacted like a hungry dog with a steak.

  “You’ve got five seconds to get off the bed and get dressed,” he growled, “before I shove my cock inside you and fuck you so hard, you’ll spend half the night screaming your throat raw.”

  Lauren didn’t move a muscle, except to send him a kittenish smile. Damn it, the woman was playing with a book of matches in the midst of dry kindling, sprinkled with gunpowder and topped with dynamite.

  “Promises, promises,” she purred.

  She wasn’t just inviting; she was taunting.

  The strategist in Noah knew he needed to rein in his lust, ask why she’d come, where she saw their relationship headed after the fabulous fuck she was goading him into. If he gave in, she might just well leave after her orgasms. He’d be tipping his hand, showing her exactly how much power she had over him. He’d have no bargaining chip when the night was through.