Next to Never: Shattered Innocence Trilogy

by A. L Long

  “Dylan, don’t be angry, I’m sorry. Please open the door,” Rade said apologetically.

  “Please just go away.”

  Rade did as she wished and left her alone.

  CHAPTER SIX

  The next morning, Dylan woke well rested to the smell of coffee. The bath did her good, as well as the good night’s sleep. Her soreness was also better. She was still pissed at Rade. She wanted to put the incident behind her and focus on getting better so she could leave. Scooting to the edge of the bed, Dylan stood, stretched, and walked to her closet to find the robe matching her overly expensive nightgown. Rade went all out in providing her clothing, which made her even more pissed. A simple set of flannel pajamas would have been enough. Once she found the matching robe, she slipped it on, tying the silk sash around her waist. Taking one last look at herself in the mirror, she headed to the kitchen.

  When she entered the kitchen, she saw Rade sitting on a bar stool with only his pajama bottoms on. She couldn’t help but stare at him. His body was perfect. Every muscle in his chest looked like it was ready to explode. She wanted to reach out and put her hands on him and feel every inch of his perfection. Rade was engrossed by the newspaper he was reading and didn’t notice that she had entered the room. Clearing her throat, announcing her presence, she walked to the coffee pot and poured herself a cup of coffee. After she finished pouring her coffee, she went to the fridge for milk. She poured a little in her mug. Spotting a sugar bowl on the counter, she added two teaspoons to her coffee. Rade was watching her every move, hoping she would say something. He knew he needed to make things right with her.

  Her silence was killing him. “Dylan, about last night, I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have taken you out of the tub the way I did.”

  “Rade, don’t. I don’t want to talk about it. What you did was very wrong. I just want to forget about the whole thing.”

  Rade looked at her with concern. The last thing he wanted was for her to pull away from him. He needed her to trust him. Trusting him would be the only way she would get close to him.

  “Dylan, come sit by me. We need to talk about what happened at your apartment.” Dylan walked to the other side of the counter where Rade was sitting.

  She pulled out the bar stool and sat beside him. “I’m not sure what you need to talk about. I don’t remember a whole lot.”

  “Well, tell me what you can remember,” Rade asked sympathetically.

  As Dylan began telling Rade what she could remember about the break-in, he listened carefully, questioning her as she told him what she recalled. She started from the beginning, when she entered her apartment. She remembered the way it looked, how all of her things were ruined. Rade hoped by having Dylan talk about it, she would slowly remember more about what happened.

  “Tell me what you saw, in detail, if you can.” If she could remember the small details, Rade was sure she would remember everything.

  “I don’t know, Rade, I remember seeing broken glass on the floor from the picture frames on the wall. I remember looking in the spare room, seeing the room torn apart. I was scared.”

  Tears began taking residence in Dylan’s eyes. Her body was shaking. Rade stood up from his chair and gently picked her up and carried her over to the couch. Dylan put her arms around his neck and tucked her head under his chin. At that moment, she was no longer angry at him. She only thought about how safe she felt in his arms. Rade sat down on the couch still holding on to her. He positioned her so she was sitting across his lap.

  “It’s okay, Sweetness. It will come back to you when you’re ready to remember.”

  Rade lifted Dylan’s chin and gently kissed her soft lips. She willingly opened her mouth, allowing Rade to kiss her deeper. Being close to him was all she wanted. Rade shifted her body so she straddled his. Feeling her body relax, he slowly moved his hands around her waist, taking hold of her silky nightgown. With her head tilted, he continued trailing light kisses down her neck to her ear. He knew he reached a sensitive spot just below her earlobe when he heard her moan softly. Her hands glided up his chest, coming to a rest on the curve of his shoulders. Rade knew she was beginning to feel the effect of his seduction. Continuing his advance, he lightly placed soft, delicate kisses along the base of her neck. Licking and pulling her tender skin, he gently sucked, leaving a faint trail of pink circles from her neck to the curve of her shoulder. What he wouldn’t give to see her skin marked. With his right hand, he slowly lowered the strap of her nightgown from her soft shoulder. Her robe had already slid off both shoulders during the shuffle, giving him easy access to her soft skin. His mouth connected with the soft area just above her collarbone where her pulse was beating. When he got to the other side, he continued his trail as he slowly lowered the remaining strap, exposing her supple breasts. Beautiful. Perfect. Flawless. Who was this angel in front of him?

  Taking in her beauty, Rade lowered his mouth to her right breast while skillfully loosening the tie on her robe. He had to taste her. One gentle suck of his mouth and she would be his.

  As Rade began kissing and gently sucking her taut nipple, he heard another soft moan from her. “Rade, please, I can’t do this.”

  He knew if he continued, she would have no power to stop him. “You feel so good, Sweetness, just let it happen.”

  With no resistance from her, Rade took hold of the other breast and gently caressed it. As he continued sucking and licking her perfection, Dylan submitted to him. Her fingers scraped through his hair, pulling him closer to her breast, deepening each suck and lick of her nipple. Her body moved closer to him, trying to satisfy the hunger she craved. Having her where he wanted her, Rade began moving his hand down her spine. Her body was incredible. Caressing her bottom, he lifted her slightly so her pussy was pressed against the erection pulsating under his pants. Every roll of her hips sent him over. His head was spinning. No way was he ever going to be able to get enough of her. He frantically kissed her breasts with desperation while tweaking her nipples between his fingers. Needing more, he looped his hand in her hair and pulled her mouth to his and began assaulting her lips with the desire he needed to unleash. Thrusting his tongue deeper, he began exploring her soft mouth, nipping and sucking her bottom lip, releasing the soft moans held hostage within her. He was consumed by her essence. Losing control, Rade tighten his hands around her firm ass. He loved the way her skin felt between his fingers. He gathered her nightgown and robe and slowly pulled it up, careful not to hurt her. His need to have her naked consumed him. With a slight shift, Dylan lifted to her knees, allowing Rade to free the silky material from her body. Slowly pulling her nightgown over her head, he only had her lacy panties to contend with. Rade could feel her wetness as he moved his hand under her thigh, giving him better access to her sex.

  Rade’s cock was pulsing as he anticipated the feel of her wrapped around him. “God, Dylan, you’re so beautiful.” He couldn’t resist kissing every inch of her. Her desire for him was evident as she surrendered to his every touch. Her body began moving with his hand as his fingers found the slick channel of her folds.

  She didn’t know how to stop what she was feeling. Every touch from Rade was making her wetter. She wanted him inside her. She was lost in him. Her mind kept telling her to Stop while her body kept telling her she needed more. The pressure of his finger slipping inside her caused her need to strengthen. First one, then another. Would this man be her first? Was she ready to give herself to him?

  “No, no, no… I can’t. Not like this.” Dylan’s eyes sprung open as she tried to pull away from him. Looking into his eyes, she could see his desire for her.

  “Rade, I can’t do this. I’ve never… I mean it has always been just…” she pleaded.

  Rade didn’t understand what she was trying to say. “What are you saying Dylan?”

  “I can’t do this, I just can’t.” Dylan slowly lifted herself from Rade, grabbing her nightgown and robe from the couch. Dylan couldn’t tell Rade. She just couldn’t. She didn’t trust
him enough to let him know. She couldn’t give herself completely to him.

  *****

  Rade was confused by Dylan’s withdrawal. This was the second time in a week she walked away from him. What was going on with her? What was she hiding? Rade stood and grabbed his cell off the coffee table. He needed to find out what was going on with her and why she continually pulled away from him. He needed this to be done.

  “Richard, any news on Dylan’s relationship with this Michael Stewart? I don’t know what’s going on with her, but I’m certain that he has something to do with it.” Rade was on fire. Not only did he need relief from his and Dylan’s little session, he also needed to put an end to her resistance to him.

  “Not yet, but if there’s anything to be found, I’ll find it,” Richard replied.

  Rade was wound up and in need of a cold shower. Once he cooled off, he would be having a long talk with Dylan, whether she wanted to or not. Walking into his bedroom, Rade heard Dylan crying. He slowly opened her bedroom door without knocking. He saw her sitting on her bed with her knees pulled close to her chest. It killed him seeing her this way. He walked to the bed and sat next to her. “Dylan, you need to let me know what’s going on. I care about you and I hate seeing you like this.”

  Dylan looked up at Rade. Could she let him know she felt like she was betraying Michael and the love they shared? Knowing deep down he was gone? “I’m sorry Rade. I just… can’t.”

  Rade could see the sadness in Dylan’s eyes. “Dylan, please talk to me. Are you afraid that I’ll hurt you? Because I would never do that.”

  “This has nothing to do with you, Rade,” she said as she looked away. “This is something I need to deal with. I just can’t be with anyone right now.”

  “Dylan, I am not going anywhere. Please tell me what’s going on. Whatever it is, we’ll figure it out.”

  She wanted to trust him, but she was afraid he would never understand. Just as she pulled herself from the bed, Rade grabbed her arm. “Dylan, I need to know what’s going on with you. Your emotions are all over the place. I’m tired of playing this teeter-totter game with you. One minute you’re into me and the next you’re pulling away.” Rade stood, forcing his fingers through his hair.

  “You want to know why, Rade?” Dylan was yelling at him with her hands clutched into tight fists and her body as stiff as a statue. “You of all people should know how it feels to love someone and then have them taken away from you.”

  Rade shifted his body so his attention was on her. He could feel her eyes burning into his skin. He may have overstepped his bounds with her, but he was tired of her games. “I don’t know what you’re trying to say, Dylan.”

  Lowering her head, avoiding his stare, she explained, “I should have been married four weeks ago… only the man I was supposed to marry never came back to me. He and a friend went on a stupid hiking trip and he got lost. They couldn’t find him, Rade.” Dylan wiped the tears from her cheeks. “I don’t know how to feel anymore. I don’t want to hurt anymore. I’m trying to move on and put those feelings behind me. I’m tired of hurting. Then you… came. I just can’t do this.”

  Her body felt drained. She just confessed the painful torture she was feeling and she couldn’t let Rade see her weakness any longer. Avoiding his emotionless stare, she walked to her bathroom and closed the door.

  *****

  Rade entered his shower, turning the knob for the cold water for the second time in less than two hours. Somehow he had to make her forget about Michael and convince her that she needed only him. He needed her trust and he was going to do whatever it took to gain it. Even if it meant resisting her. The question was, how long would he be able to wait? Just seeing her naked made every nerve in his being twinge. He could barely restrain himself when he pulled her from the tub. And then again on the couch, it really tested his willpower. Feeling her skin next to his was pure bliss. She was pure perfection.

  As Rade was drying off, he heard his cell ringing in the other room. He quickly wrapped his towel around his waist and walked to the side table where he had placed his phone.

  “Richard, what do you have for me?”

  “Well, sir, I found out that Ms. Adams and Mr. Stewart went to the same college. Mr. Stewart graduated a few years ahead of Ms. Adams. After he graduated, he was offered a job with Whitaker, Smith, and Associates. He met Dylan a few years later. It appears Lilly Davis introduced them. Ms. Adams and Mr. Stewart announced their engagement shortly before she was to graduate. They moved in together in an apartment. Both names are on the lease. About three months later, Mr. Stewart went missing on some hiking trip with his best friend Eric Simon in Colorado, up near the Pike’s Peak area. His body was never found. There is nothing else on him. He grew up in Colorado, near Denver. He got a full scholarship to Columbia. Both his parents still live in Colorado. He seemed to be a good kid. No police records. The rest you know.”

  After Rade hung up with Richard, he got dressed and went to the living room. Dylan was already there, staring out the window. Rade could tell she didn’t hear him as he came up behind her. She flinched when he put his hand on her shoulder. Standing behind her, he gently turned her so she was facing him. “How about we get out of here? Do you think you’re up to it?”

  Dylan looked up and nodded. “Yes.”

  Rade grabbed Dylan’s coat, holding it for her as she put it on. When he knew she was set, he grabbed his jacket and keys. He hoped getting her out of the penthouse would make her feel better and he could start working on her trust.

  Rade thought it would be nice to take a walk around Central Park. It wasn’t too cold outside for February, so he thought a walk would do them good. While they walked, they talked about his company and his many achievements. He had to be careful not to share too much information with Dylan regarding his many ventures. He didn’t want to give away that he owned the company she was to start working for next week. He also didn’t want her to know he owned the company Michael worked for.

  The more they talked, Rade was pretty sure Dylan knew nothing about the money taken from his company by her ex. She seemed so innocent. The way she laughed. How she smiled when she talked about her childhood. How unhappy she got when she talked about her mom. Everything about her pulled Rade in deeper. Hook, line, and sinker.

  When Dylan started to open up about Michael, it made his stomach turn. If she only knew the real truth about him. What made a girl like Dylan fall for the likes of Michael Stewart? She was the good, while he was the bad. Rade could never tell her who Michael really was. He wasn’t even sure she would believe him if he did. This was a secret he would need to keep hidden.

  It was close to one o’clock and the weather was getting colder as the skies began to cloud over. Rade took Dylan’s hand. “We better head back to the car. It’s getting chilly and I need to feed you.” Dylan looked at Rade with a smile. She hadn’t thought about food, but she was getting hungry. “There is a little restaurant a few blocks from here. We can grab something there to take home.”

  Rade placed their order at the quaint little bistro. While they waited, they settled at a corner table for two. He thought a cup of hot chocolate would be nice while they waited for their order. Dylan felt better about Rade. This was a side of him she hadn’t seen before and she really liked it. Noticing that he was looking at her, she wondered what he was thinking.

  Taking her hand and gently rubbing it, Rade broke their silence. “I hope you’re feeling better. You seemed really upset this morning. I’m really sorry you had to go through so much. I really didn’t mean to upset you.”

  Dylan reached out and took Rade’s hand into hers. “It isn’t your fault. It’s just… what’s been happening between us has been a little overwhelming. You make me feel things I haven’t felt for a while. I’m afraid of what these feelings could bring. I can’t bear another broken heart.”

  With her hand in his, he gave it a gentle squeeze, reassuring her that everything was going to be all right. Hiding hi
s true thoughts, he knew no matter what happened between them, someone was going to get hurt. His plan wasn’t going the way he wanted. He was beginning to have feelings for her too. Pushing away his thoughts, he slowly placed his free hand on her cheek and gently rubbed it with his thumb. With Dylan looking at him with her emerald greens, he slowly lowered his lips to hers and kissed her. He never felt the need to kiss any woman more than he wanted to kiss Dylan. He felt her pain all the way to his own heart. What was she doing to him? He needed her.

  A voice yelled, snapping them from their trance. Rade didn’t want to let go of her. He wanted this moment to last a while longer. With regret, he broke their embrace and stood. Looking at Dylan he said. “I’ll grab our order, then we can leave.” Dylan was still paralyzed by their kiss. All she could do was nod.

  CHAPTER SEVEN

  Rade was thankful the traffic was minimal on their drive back to the penthouse. He couldn’t wait any longer to get Dylan home. By the time he pulled into the parking garage, he had a full blown erection. Never had a woman caused him to become so hard from just a kiss. He was learning with Dylan he was powerless.