Amit: ‘I didn’t do anything. Got it. You deserve it. You didn’t give anything that I wanted. Riya is keeping me happy. She is a darling.’
Neha: ‘I loved you so much. Aditya loves Riya so much. Why did you have to propose to her?’
Amit: ‘Please don’t tell me that you loved me. You never loved me. As for Aditya, I don’t care about him. He could not handle a darling sweet girl like Riya. Now she is mine.’
I did not want to hear all this. But I had to. I wanted to know what was in his mind. I reached the Eastern Express highway. Their conversation continued.
Neha: ‘What made you feel that way? I really loved you.’
Amit: ‘You didn’t. Forget about other things, you never even allowed me to kiss you. You never had trust in me. Leave it.’
Neha: ‘So Riya is giving you everything. Does it mean she loves you? Where doess Aditya stand in this picture? Is he nothing for her?’
Amit: ‘No, he is nothing. He is her past. I am her present and future. He has never been loyal to her. He slept with someone else and didn’t tell her about it. This is not right.’
Neha: ‘You are doing nothing different. You also didn’t bother to tell me. You can never love anyone. I know it now.’
Amit: ‘You don’t have to teach me what is right and what is wrong. You want to hear the truth, then hear it. But you can never prove it.’
Neha: ‘What do you want to say?’
Amit: ‘I am with Riya because I want a physical relationship. I don’t love her. And if she gives me what you didn’t, then I can live with her for a long time. I will keep her happy.’
I had lost my senses by then. I knew he was fooling my Riya. But who was going to make Riya understand? I was losing my mind.
Neha: ‘You are a bastard. Why are you doing this? I love you Amit. I can’t live without you. Please Amit please. Please come back to me. I will give you whatever you want. But please don’t leave me.’
Amit: ‘Sorry, now I won’t. She is so hot. Much more hotter than you. You get lost now. I will give her what Aditya could not give.’
I interrupted their conversation. I could not control myself.
Me: ‘Madarchod, don’t you feel any guilt? You are talking about your friend’s girlfriend.’
Amit: ‘Aditya, have you been listening to our conversation all this while? I will kill you Neha. Aditya, just leave Riya and me alone. She is my girlfriend now. You could not give her the pleasure that I can.’
Me: ‘You bastard! Some relationships mean more than sex. And you are fooling Riya! You used her vulnerability to your advantage while I was gone. I had never thought you could do something like this.’
Amit: ‘Bloody loser. You slept with someone else and are now telling me to stop doing so. I will sleep with her.’
I was driving my bike at full speed. I wanted to reach Aerol as soon as possible. I wanted to tell Riya that this man was fooling her. I wanted to stop Riya from going any further with him. She was too sweet and innocent to know that she was being taken advantage of. She must be thinking Amit loved her. But he just wanted her in his bed.
Amit: ‘And one more thing, Aditya. The black spot on her back is really sexy. It feels so good to kiss her there.’
I could not control myself. I wanted to hit him hard. I was so angry that I didn’t see a bus coming at full speed in my direction. By the time I realized I was too close to the bus, it was too late. I tried to apply the brakes but I lost control over my bike.
The next thing I remember is that there was a huge crowd surrounding me. My legs and hands were bleeding. My entire body was aching badly. But the injuries did not look so serious. My headset was lost. People around me gave me water and I was alright in few minutes. I somehow sat on my Activa again and started driving. I wanted to meet all of them as quickly as possible. My injuries didn’t hurt as much as my heart did. I reached Aerol.
Riya saw me bleeding from a distance. She was with Neha and Amit. She came running towards me. I was parking my Activa. She started crying looking at my condition. She asked me what had happened and shouted at me saying that I always was a rash driver. For one minute I thought my Riya was back, like she hadn’t forgotten me completely. But she regained her composure soon. I felt like she still loved me. But was afraid. She loved Amit too. Maybe she didn’t love me anymore. I didn’t know what to believe anymore.
All our relationships had undergone a sea change—Amit was not a friend anymore. Riya was not my girlfriend anymore. Neha was not Amit’s girlfriend anymore. Neha and Riya were no longer friends.
Seeing that we wanted a bit of time to talk it out with each other, Neha and Amit went and stood at a distance. I was with Riya. She didn’t even look into my eyes.
‘What happened, bachcha? Did I hurt you so much that you left me and accepted Amit in a wink?’
She didn’t say anything. She had tears in her eyes.
‘Jaan please don’t cry. I still love you in the same way as I used to. Please say something jaan. Was I not worthy of your love?’
‘It’s not like that Aadi. But you took me for granted. I loved you even more than my life. But our relationship was getting worse. There was no point in being together,’ she said.
‘I love you jaan. I can’t live without you now. Even my parents know about you. Please don’t behave like this. I will change. Give me one more chance. I promise to prove you wrong,’ I almost cried.
‘You can never be my Aadi again.’ She took my hand in hers to see how much blood was oozing. She wiped it off with her napkin.
‘You forgot everything that happened between us? The 7 promises, my birthday, everything? You really don’t love me anymore?’ I was looking into her eyes.
‘Aadi, I care for you. I can’t see you like this. Please be normal and happy. I want you to smile.’
‘Great. How can I smile when you are with someone else? You were the smile on my face. I will miss all those memories. Please come back. Please,’ I pleaded.
‘I can’t, Aadi. I can’t. I can never trust you. I can’t break Amit’s trust now. But I want you to smile. I want you to take care of yourself. I want you to eat properly. Don’t misbehave with your mom. Study well. Please try to forget me. I am not saying I won’t talk to you again. But please don’t make me cry by making a sad face. I can’t see my sweet little bachcha crying. I want him to enjoy his life even without me. You will always be special to me. Please forgive me. Take care. I will always miss you till my dying breath,’ she cried.
‘How can I do all these things without you jaan? Please come back. I can’t handle this. I don’t want to. Give me one chance. Please.’
She was walking away from me. My heart was bleeding. I was watching my love going away from me and I could do nothing about it. Nothing at all. This made me more depressed. I wanted her. I could not handle my life without her. I was used to being with her. I loved her.
Neha was also crying. Even Amit was firm on his decision to break up with Neha. I wanted to tell Riya about Amit’s real intentions. But I didn’t because it would have made the situation worse. She was totally under his influence. She would never have listened to me at that moment. Amit smiled at me. He caught Riya’s hand and went away.
‘Aadi, please stop them. Please. I can’t see them together. I can’t face this,’ Neha cried.
I did not say anything. My heart was bleeding.
Now I was beginning to understand what someone had once said—some love stories can never be predicted.
All Alone
I could never forget the days we spent together. We had a lot of fun, especially when we were together. I will always remember her presence in college. The laughter that we shared, the dreams that we had, and the promises we made. But those dreams changed with time and left a big hole in my heart. I knew she had moved on in her life. She had got someone better than me. But I still wished she cared for me.
I was all alone in college. I missed her everywhere. I stopped going to the canteen. W
henever I went there, I could see that table where we used to sit. Where we sang songs together. I stopped listening to our favourite song because it made me cry even more. It became difficult for me to face others. I wanted to avoid everyone. Having lunch all alone made me love her even more. I could see her in college. Though she talked to me occasionally, she was not the same Riya anymore.
I had to attend lectures as PL, the official study leave before exams, was hardly a week away. Everything seemed to be different. I was missing her badly. I was regretting my decision. In fact I had started loving her more than before. I realized love had no limits. I realized what I had heard was actually true. Break up always made you love your girlfriend more. I was facing the same thing. Swapnil, Sameer, and Anup came to see me. I had been ignoring them for the last few days. I was not in the mood to face the world. They landed up at home one day and asked me what was the problem.
‘Riya broke up with me. She left me all alone. I think I don’t deserve her. But I still love her. I love her very much. I want her back in my life.’
‘What happened? Why did she leave you? You must have done something wrong. Don’t worry, she will come back to you eventually,’ Swapnil said.
‘She won’t come back to me. She has a new boyfriend now,’ I said with tears rolling down my face.
‘Are you silly? What are you saying? She can’t do this. She loves you so much. You both love each other. You are a perfect couple. So stop saying negative things,’ Sameer said.
‘I am serious. I know it. She is with Amit now. I hope you remember him.’
‘What are you saying? I can’t believe this. But how? Why? What about Neha? Shall I talk to her? ‘Swapnil seemed surprised.
I didn’t answer them. I just went away. I was upset. I was fed up with all these questions. I went to class. She was not with me. She was sitting on some other bench. I felt frustrated.
After the class was over, she talked with me for a few minutes about frivolous things that had no meaning. But she got a call in the middle of our conversation and left. I was alone again. The feeling of loneliness was killing me. I wanted to talk to her.
I messaged her: Can we talk tonight? I am missing you. Please jaan.
She replied saying, Okay. Call me at 11 pm.
There were no sweet words in the message. I was waiting for the clock to strike 11. I was eager to talk to her.
I called her at 11 sharp.
But I got an automated response from the network provider saying, ‘The number you are trying to call is busy.’ I tried again but got the same response. I called Amit. Even his phone was busy. I knew she was talking to him. I called up Neha. She told me that she had been trying Amit’s number since the past few minutes.
‘Aadi, it’s all over. I don’t think Amit will come back to me. He doesn’t even reply to my messages now. Riya at least replies to yours. He is avoiding me completely. I am broken. Please do something.’
‘What can I do? I am sailing in the same boat. Even I want my Riya back. Even I want to feel her love. But I am helpless. I am trying my level best to bring her back. I am going to ask her to come with me tomorrow,’ I said.
‘Do you think she will come with you? I don’t think so. They have forgotten us,’ she replied dejectedly.
‘Please don’t say this. I won’t let her go so easily.’ I called her once again. Again her cell was busy. I sent her a message saying I needed to talk to her urgently.
She didn’t reply.
I waited for her call till 3 am. Waiting for so long made me realize what she must have felt when I ignored her calls that day. I was crying. Her busy ringtone was killing me. Finally she called me back.
‘What is so urgent that you keep calling me again and again? Don’t you understand I was on call with someone? Now say what you want to say.’ She seemed angry.
‘Jaan, I was missing you. I want to meet you. I really love you jaan. Please forgive me. Please come back,’ I cried.
‘Is this what you wanted to tell me? Is it so urgent?’
‘No. I wanted to ask you if tomorrow we could go out somewhere for the whole day—just the two of us?’ I knew she would not agree to it.
‘No. I have work tomorrow at home. I can come day after tomorrow.’
As she said this I smiled.
‘Ok jaan. No problem. I will be waiting for day after tomorrow.’ I saw the date on the calendar. This could not be a miracle. She had planned the meeting on October 11—her birthday. I really thought God had a role to play in it. I messaged her: Your birthday will be special. Full of surprises…miss you.
Changing Relationships
It was October 11—her birthday. I wanted to make her realize what she meant to me. I wanted to make her realize that no one could love her more than me. I wanted to relive the moments of my birthday. With the same surprises and a few more. I knew if today I could make her realize how much I loved her, she would never go back to Amit.
We had decided to go to Chowpatty. I could have taken her to Grant Lane but I was afraid because she had been with Amit to Grant Lane only a few days back. We boarded the train. I took out the first surprise from my bag.
‘A white rose to clear the fights between us,’ I said handing over the rose to her.
She accepted it. But there was no reaction on her face.
‘Thanks but…’ I stopped her from saying anything else.
Maybe I knew what she was going to say. She was not the same Riya. She was looking out of the window and I was looking at her. I took out the second rose for her after some time.
‘A yellow rose for our friendship. A friendship that we once shared. We can still go back to that,’ I said.
‘I don’ think we can be what we were. Time changes everything. Still thanks again,’ she said and gave me a weak smile.
I was losing my temper. But I didn’t want to fight. I kept cool. We got out of the station and called for an autorickshaw. I took out the third surprise for her. It was a letter. I had written it personally for her.
I remember the day we met for the first time. I was in love the moment I saw you. Slowly both of us came together. I loved the way you took care of me. I loved the way you called me bachcha. I loved the way you smiled at me. I loved the way you kissed me. I loved the way you looked at me. There is nothing in you which I hate. Nothing at all. If there is something that I hate, it’s my fault. You could never be wrong. I love you more than myself. I am sorry. I am sorry and I am really sorry. I want to live those moments again with you. I want to propose to you again.
I can’t forget whatever you did for me in the last one year. But I’m ready to forget whatever you did with me in the last few days. Please jaan, can we be the same Aditya and Riya who used to be the famous couple in our colony, in our college, and among our friends? Can we be together again? I am ready to accept all your faults and change all my faults. But please don’t go away. I can’t see you with anyone else. Love you a lot.
Your Aditya
She kept the letter with her. I was happy to see tears in her eyes. It meant she still had some feelings for me and everything was not over yet. I tried to hold her hand. She didn’t allow me to. I was upset by her reaction. Still I smiled at her. I was pampering her continuously, trying to make her smile and enjoy each moment.
‘Jaan, are you happy with whatever decision you have taken? Do you really think Amit can keep you happy? Do you feel he loves you?’ I asked her.
‘Yes, he loves me. He really does. And please let’s not talk about that,’ she said irritatedly.
‘How can you say he loves you? If he can betray Neha, he can betray you too,’ I said.
‘I don’t care what he did with Neha. Now he is with me and we love each other. I am with you because I care for you. Nothing else. So please don’t call me by nick names. I am in a relationship. It doesn’t look good.’
This was too much. Now I cannot call my Riya by her pet name also. She used to call me bachcha. Now what? Everything I was doing
was going wrong. We reached Chowpatty.
We were sitting on the seashore looking at the waves. I was making her recollect all those moments that we spent together. She had tears in her eyes. I gave her another surprise. It was another letter.
I want today to be special. I want your birthday to be celebrated the same way we had celebrated mine. These few days have been the worst days of my life. Still today I want you and me together. I want to give you smile and tears. I want you to feel me.
I knew something was wrong from day one. But I didn’t say a word. When you told me you went on a bike ride with him, I should have told you it was wrong. When you told me you and he slept together, I should have asked how could you? But I didn’t say a word. How could I sit back and watch your world be destroyed?
He is playing with you. But you won’t understand this now.
That burning desire to touch your skin won’t go away. Maybe you will just kiss me again, and pretend you like me and want me again. But I don’t want you to pretend. All I want is that you should wake up from the dreamworld he is showing you before it’s too late. Or there is one option. Would that be better for you?
I can pretend that I don’t cry for you the whole day. We can pretend we never loved each other and we both used each other for physical needs. In reality there will always be that throbbing pain in our hearts.
We can pretend that you were nothing in my life. We can also pretend every small promise was fake.
Is this a good option for you? Another option is we can stop pretending and come back together because we know we neither used each other nor did we want each other for physical needs. We loved each other like crazy. We cared for each other like crazy. Please think it over again jaan. I want you to be my Riya. My mom wants you to be mine. When everybody is with us, why do you want to go against the world? To just fall down from a cliff? There is only death after that. Trust me.
She cried after reading this. I pulled her close to me. She rested her head on my shoulders. I thought I had got my Riya back. But she regained composure and apologized for having done that. I was helpless. I could not do anything.
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