Tragically Flawed

by A. M. Hargrove

  She ended the call and left Riviera fuming. The woman just didn’t know when to quit. It never stopped with her. She would be able to find fault with God.

  Riviera was still fuming when she stormed into the house where she was working. Her trompe l’oeil was coming along beautifully, in her humble opinion. Even Shan thought it was great. As she mixed her paints and prepared to work, she heard someone calling her name. Following the sound, she walked down the hall until she found the source. Lying there half naked and fully exposed was Shan. Riviera’s eyes ate him up as he worked himself into the most amazing orgasm she’d ever witnessed.

  Shan was caught in the throes of an erotic dream of Riviera. He’d been so tired, he’d crashed in the house where she was working. His desire to be close to her had brought him here, along with his fantasies of her. They were making love, and she was on top, riding him with her lovely hips moving to a rhythm only he could hear. He watched as she leaned forward to lick and then bite his nipple. He groaned and called out her name. He was so close to coming, but he wanted to please her too. She wouldn’t slow her movements, though, and reaching behind her, she fondled him, massaging his heaviness. Unable to hold off his orgasm any longer, he let loose, calling out her name once more.

  Unable to stifle her gasp, Riviera’s hand flew to her mouth, but it was too late. Shan opened his eyes and looked directly at Riviera. At first he wasn’t sure if she was part of his fantasy or if she was truly there. Then the whole scene crashed into him. He quickly tucked his package back in his jeans and didn’t quite know how to handle this whole fiasco. He was ashamed of himself.

  Shan wondered why she just stood there staring. Knowing Riviera, he was surprised she hadn’t run away screaming. If he didn’t know better, he would’ve thought the whole scene had turned her on. Her skin was flushed as air puffed through her parted lips. Neither of them could tear their eyes off each other. Shan prayed she would say something, anything, to break this unbearable silence. Finally, she fumbled along the wall and stumbled out of the room.

  Cursing himself for his own creepiness, not to mention stupidity, he dragged his T-shirt over his head and headed toward the garage. He needed to find a way to mend this rift, for he knew it would widen if he didn’t act fast.

  Riviera crouched on the floor of her room, so confused. She’d wanted to touch him, kiss him, to crawl all over him when she found him. Why hadn’t she said anything when he’d opened his eyes and looked at her? Did she have anything to fear? Amie said he was all about her the other night. Is that what he was doing … fantasizing about her? Should she be creeped out or flattered? She didn’t know what to do.

  Jumping to her feet, she darted out the front door in a jog. She was on the road when she heard the rumbling of his truck.

  Shan saw her ahead and knew he had to act if there would ever be a chance for them. He pulled off and started to chase her on foot.

  “Riviera! Please, stop!” He was completely surprised when she did.

  She turned around and their gazes locked. Her chest heaved and Shan chided himself for staring at it.

  “I’m so sorry. That wasn’t … what I mean is, I didn’t intend for you to see that. I’m embarrassed more than I can say.”

  He waited for her to say something, but she didn’t. She just stood and stared at him. Her gaze drifted downward and remained there. Wondering what she had locked on to, he followed it and his eyes widened when he realized what she was staring at … a large wet spot on the lower part of his shirt.

  “Christ, Riv. Ah fuck,” he groaned. He threw his arms up and plowed his hands through his hair. “Look, I know you think I’m some fucking pervert, but if you want to know the truth, I was dreaming of you.”

  Shan still received no comment from her as she shifted from one foot to the other.

  “Will you please say something? Anything? I can deal with that, even if you tell me to get fucked.”

  She cleared her throat and swallowed. “I honestly don’t know what to say.”

  He started pacing and then blew out his breath. “I don’t know what to say, either. All I know is that I don’t want this to ruin what’s between us. I like being with you, obviously, or I wouldn’t be jacking off in my dreams over you. Shit. Shit. Shit.” He scrubbed his face.

  “I think I need to go back inside and get to work,” she murmured.

  “Riviera, tell me I haven’t ruined things between us and that you don’t hate me for this. Please,” he pleaded, his expression pained.

  Did she hate him, Riviera asked herself? Hell no, she didn’t hate him. In fact, she was so turned on by what she’d seen, she didn’t quite know what to do. How could she hate him for that?

  Glancing at her shoes and then back up at his beautiful face, she wanted to erase that awful look on it. She never wanted to see him like that. “I don’t hate you, Shan. And it’s not the end of the world, okay?”

  He stretched out his arm, intending to touch her, but then dropped it to his side as he thought the better of it.

  “Thank you. You must know I’d never do something like that intentionally.” His voice shook as he spoke. “It was a dream,” his voice trailed off.

  “Um, can we just not talk about it?”

  “Okay. But please know I’m really sorry you saw that.”

  She nodded, shoved her hands in the pockets of her jeans, and started back to the house. He stared at her until he couldn’t see her anymore.

  The whole thing had rattled her to the core. She’d been sinfully aroused by it, piercingly so, but was too shy to let him know. God, what a mess. She couldn’t wait to tell Amie. She needed her advice on this one.

  *****

  “So you’re telling me you caught him in the unholy act? You actually saw him Yankeeing the doodle?”

  “Uh-huh.”

  “And calling out your name?”

  “Yep,” Riviera squeaked as she stared at her hands.

  “And you didn’t crawl on top of him? What the fuck is wrong with you, girl?”

  Her head snapped up. “You can’t be serious.”

  “You don’t think? Trade places with me for a few minutes and watch. If I’d walked into that room, my ass would’ve been naked faster than the speed of freakin’ sound.”

  “Seriously?”

  “Yes, damn it!”

  “And you don’t think there’s anything creepy about it?”

  “Riv, the only thing creepy in my book is that you didn’t do anything but stand there. Jeez, you’re a damn saint. It’s not like he was doing it in public, for Pete’s sake. And he was dreaming about you!”

  “I was frozen.”

  “Yeah, a frozen idiot.”

  “Okay, okay, I got the message.”

  “And then he apologized and admitted he was fantasizing about you. Holy mastur-effin-bation.”

  “Okay, stop already.”

  “Listen, all kidding aside. You asked my opinion and I’m going to give it to you. That man has it bad for you. I told you that yesterday. It’s written all over his face when he looks at you. I’ve seen him around a lot of rich, gorgeous women who throw themselves at him, and he ignores them all. Not you, Riv. You’ve gotten under his skin somehow. You need to go for it. And I’m not kidding here. He’s got it all, honey.”

  “But I’m afraid.”

  “Damn, girl, just because you get laid doesn’t mean you have to marry the man! Go and have some fun. God knows, you more than anyone deserve it!”

  “Maybe. We’ll see. Why the hell can’t I be like you? Why can’t I be bold instead of some puny-ass scaredy-cat who’s afraid of her own shadow?”

  Amie hugged her and said, “You’re not a puny-ass scaredy-cat. Just stop whining about it and don’t wait too long or you might miss your opportunity.”

  Chapter Twelve

  Awkward Much?

  Inspecting the dome for missing details, Riviera heard her phone buzz.

  It was in her back jeans pocket, so she ripped off her glove a
nd dug it out to check out who was calling her.

  Shan

  Her heart immediately started doing its giddy-upping and flames licked at her most intimate bits.

  “Hi, Shan.”

  “Hey, Riviera. Hope your day is going well.”

  She loved how hot his voice sounded. “It’s good, thanks. I’m just finishing up the dome. You should see it. It looks … well, I think it looks pretty good, if I do say so myself.”

  “Well, I guess I need to stop by and take a look. I’m only a few minutes away. Would you mind?”

  “No! Why would I mind?”

  “I, well, I wasn’t sure after yesterday.”

  “Oh, that. I want you to see it, Shan. And are we still on for tonight?”

  “I was hoping we were,” he said, leaving it open for her.

  “Well, yeah, if you still want to.”

  She heard him sigh into the phone. “I’d love to, Riviera. I’ll be there in about ten minutes. I can’t wait to see your ceiling.”

  After she ended the call, Riviera took one last look at her work before she dropped her brushes in the jar. She was picking up the drop cloths when she heard Shan walk through the door.

  Her heart stumbled around in her chest again when her eyes landed on him. He was wearing a dusky blue, long-sleeved T-shirt that hugged his firm body. It was tucked into a pair of tight-fitting jeans that rode low on his lean hips. Riviera couldn’t help but suck in her breath as an image of him, stretched out and half naked, flashed into her mind.

  Their eyes met and when he scraped his teeth across his full lower lip, she felt her inner muscles clench. She mused on how her body would react if they were ever skin-to-skin. Her panties became damp and she flushed at her naughty thoughts.

  “Hey,” his husky voice pulled her back to the present. He noticed her rosy cheeks and briefly wondered if she was thinking about the same thing he was.

  “Hey to you,” she mumbled back.

  “So,” he cleared his throat, “let me take a look here.”

  She moved aside so he could get the bird’s-eye view. Shan had never seen anything quite like it. It almost jumped off the ceiling at him, making him feel like the sky was right there for the taking.

  “My God, Riviera. I feel like I can touch those clouds. And that blue … the color is so intense. You’re amazing. I sincerely mean that. This needs to be photographed and put in High Mountain Homes. They’re always after me to do a photo session. I’m gonna have Janet set something up. Are you good with that?” He looked at her in awe.

  “I guess.”

  Not comfortable with this type of attention, because she’d never received it before, she bowed her head and thanked him.

  “You really have no idea, do you?” he asked quietly.

  “About what?”

  He wanted to say a million things to her, but he answered her with, “How talented you are?”

  She looked at him. “Are you toying with me?”

  “Riviera, do I look like I am?”

  She scrutinized his face and answered, “No, I don’t suppose you are.”

  “I’m not. At all. You’re the most talented painter I’ve ever known. I’m dead serious here.”

  “Thank you, Shan. But tell that to Marsha Sue.”

  “Oh, she knows.”

  The silence stretched between them, as neither knew what to say next. Shan shuffled his feet a bit and marveled at the dome while Riviera grew more uncomfortable with the silence. When it appeared the awkward impasse would continue for hours, Riviera finally blurted out that she had a therapy session at five and had to run. He helped her load her car with her supplies and promised to pick her up at seven.

  “I’m going to call the magazine, Riviera. That dome needs to be shown off.”

  “Whatever you think, Shan,” she said as she got into her car. He watched as she sped away, thinking how that ceiling could possibly put her in such demand, she would need to hire a team to help her.

  Riviera, on the other hand, drove to her appointment with her mind spinning. “Oh dear God, that was awkward. How the hell am I ever going to get through an entire meal with him?” she wondered aloud. Things were so discomfiting—she hoped they wouldn’t stay that way for long. But damn, it was hard not to picture him, in that bed, doing the dirty to himself. That had been the hottest thing she’d ever witnessed.

  *****

  Dr. Lena Ashworth sat and listened to Riviera as she explained what happened between her and Shan on Saturday night and then on Monday morning.

  “So, Riviera, I’m not sure what you’re asking me.”

  “I don’t know what to do.”

  “Do you feel threatened by him?”

  “Not at all.”

  “Has he ever suggested anything to you that would indicate or lead you to believe he has a violent nature or would ever raise a hand to you in violence?”

  “Never.”

  “Are you worried that because you caught him doing something not intended for your eyes, that somehow, it makes him a bad person?”

  Riviera groaned. “I don’t know! I’m so confused.”

  “I’m confused over what you’re confused about.”

  “Dr. Ashworth, I caught him masturbating!”

  “Indeed you did. Do you not think most men, or women for that matter, do that?”

  “Well, yeah, but …”

  Dr. Ashworth leaned forward in her chair and smiled. “Riviera, he wasn’t doing it in public. He didn’t intend for you to see it. He did it in his sleep.” She cocked her head and finally asked, “It wasn’t catching him that was the problem, was it?”

  Riviera dropped her gaze and stared at her clasped hands. “It was so …”

  “What, Riviera? What was it?”

  Her face ignited into flames. “Sexy.”

  “Good.”

  She whipped her head up and looked at Dr. Ashworth. “Good?”

  “Very good. You were worried that you’d never be able to have a relationship with a man. Well, you’ve just blown your own theory. You responded, Riviera. And quite exuberantly, I might add, by the looks of you. Did you have a full-blown sexual response?”

  Riviera’s mouth formed a huge O as she stared at Dr. Ashworth.

  “It’s okay, Riviera. No, it’s much better than okay. Listen, you’ve been through years of sexual trauma, so for you to have a heightened sexual response from just watching him is actually excellent.”

  Riviera didn’t know what to say. Dr. Ashworth sat there looking like the cat that swallowed the canary. “So what you’re saying is that this was a good thing?”

  “Absolutely. My suggestion is if you like this man, and if he likes you, continue on this path. I’m not suggesting that you do anything that goes outside of the realm of your morals, but do whatever is right for you. Don’t be afraid to get involved with him. I do have another question for you. Does he know about your past?”

  “He knows some. He knows Jasper beat me. But there are things, Dr. Ashworth, that I may not be able to ever tell him. I’ve made him aware of that.”

  “Good. As long as he knows what he’s dealing with, you’re fine.”

  *****

  Driving home, Riviera felt somewhat better after talking to Dr. Ashworth. At least Shan wasn’t a pervert or anything, nor was she for thinking he’s hot.

  Now she had to figure out what to wear.

  Running through the house, she headed to the bathroom for a quick shower and shampoo. Not being one to spend time styling her hair, she thought she’d ask Amie for her opinion.

  “How should I wear my hair?”

  “Wear it down. Put one of your braids across the top to catch most of your bangs, but let some escape. He’ll love it.”

  “What should I wear?”

  “A little black dress.”

  “This is all I have.” She held up a black three-quarter sleeve dress with a deep V-neck. It was short so it showed off her long legs.

  “Perfect.”
r />   “Shoes?”

  “Fuck-me pumps.”

  Thirty minutes later, Riviera emerged, dressed and ready to go.

  “Damn, girl, you look hot. Shan will be jackin’ his pack again tonight.”

  “Amie! Can you not think about anything else?”

  “Well, it’s true. You’re gonna turn lots of heads, and make his pop up.” She winked and laughed. Riviera huffed. “And the red shoes are perfect. They really add some snap to the dress.”

  “Thanks. I’ve had them forever but never got to wear them. I had them hidden in the back of my closet.”

  “I can see why. Shan’s gonna want to fuck the hell out of you tonight.”

  “Amie! Stop it! I’m nervous enough as it is.”

  “The man’s junk will be twitching. Mark my words.” In reality, Riviera envied Amie's boldness. She wished she could be more like that.

  Five minutes later, the doorbell rang. Amie answered it and let Shan in, mouthing to Riviera behind his back how hot he looked. The girls were grinning—Riviera could not have agreed with her more.

  Shan was dressed in a black suit with a black shirt and red tie. He looked amazing. His thick hair was messy, making him look like he didn’t give a damn about his appearance. It only added to his sexiness. All Riviera wanted to do was brush it off his forehead and run her fingers through it.

  When they saw each other, they laughed. “We obviously got the memo,” Riviera said, referring to his red tie.

  “I guess we did. You look perfect, Riviera,” he said as his eyes slowly raked her from head to toe.

  Her body heated, as did his gaze. “So do you, Shan.”

  They stood and ogled each other.

  Amie finally piped in. “So, where are you two headed?”

  “Oh,” he said turning, so he could include her in their conversation, “we’re going to the Five Star Diner.”

  “Excellent. You’ll love it, Riv. Great food.”

  “Well, we best head out, then.”

  Shan placed his hand on the small of her back, sending a tingle up her spine, and Riviera allowed him to lead her out of the condo. When they reached the parking area, she searched for his truck but didn’t see it.

  “Where’s your truck?”

  He chuckled. “Riviera, did you honestly think I’d make you climb into that rig dressed like that?”