Brunette Ambition

by Lea Michele

  BRUNETTE

  AMBITION

  LEA MICHELE

  CROWN ARCHETYPE

  NEW YORK

  Copyright © 2014 by Lea Michele

  All rights reserved.

  Published in the United States by CROWN ARCHETYPE, an imprint of the Crown Publishing Group, a division of Random House LLC, a Penguin Random House Company, New York.

  www.crownpublishing.com

  Crown Archetype with colophon is a trademark of RANDOM HOUSE LLC.

  Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data

  Michele, Lea.

  Brunette ambition/Lea Michele.

  p. cm.

  1. Self-help—Personal Growth—General. 2. Biography & Autobiography—Entertainment & Performing Arts. 3. Self-help.

  BF697.S46

  2013050624

  ISBN 978-0-8041-3907-6

  eBook ISBN 978-0-8041-3908-3

  Book design by JENNIFER K. BEAL DAVIS for BALLAST DESIGN

  Photography credits: see this page

  Cover design by Michael Nagin

  Cover photography: Peggy Sirota (cover); Justin Coit (fashion, food, fitness)

  v3.1

  This book is dedicated to my

  beautiful mother:

  Thank you for being the safety

  net that has always allowed me

  to reach for the stars.

  Cover

  Title Page

  Copyright

  Dedication

  LETTER TO FANS

  CHAPTER 1: WHAT MAKES ME ME

  CHAPTER 2: THE BIZ

  CHAPTER 3: SELF-CARE 101

  CHAPTER 4: FOR THE LOVE OF FOOD

  CHAPTER 5: LIVING THE FIT LIFE

  CHAPTER 6: EVERYDAY STYLE

  CHAPTER 7: RED CARPET FASHION

  CHAPTER 8: HOLLYWOOD GLAM

  CHAPTER 9: FRIENDSHIP

  CHAPTER 10: MY LIFE WITH GLEE

  UNTIL NEXT TIME

  ACKNOWLEDGMENTS

  PHOTOGRAPHY CREDITS

  TO THE GREATEST FANS ON EARTH

  I’ve been so lucky in my life—in Glee and beyond—to have such an incredible support system in all of you. You’ve really made this journey so wonderful, and I most certainly wouldn’t be where I am today without you.

  This book is the story of how I got to where I am today—as incredible and unexpected as that journey has been. My hope is that you take something from it that will inspire and motivate you, and also make you realize that anything you want to accomplish in your life is completely possible. After all—through some remarkable luck and a lot of hard work—I’ve managed to make many of my dreams come true.

  I especially want to thank my biggest fan, Cory, who read almost every chapter of this book. He, too, was so thankful for all the support I had from all of you. He very much lives on in these pages: Not only did he give me a ton of practical feedback in terms of notes and edits, but he shines through in everything that I’ve done in my life and has been an incredible source of love and inspiration. I couldn’t have made this book without him.

  CH 1

  WHAT MAKES ME ME

  “A human being is only interesting if he’s in contact with himself. I learned you have to trust yourself, be what you are, and do what you ought to do the way you should do it.”

  —BARBRA STREISAND

  I firmly believe that where you come from makes you you—and that when you celebrate your roots and focus on how those roots make you distinct, you have the greatest chance of becoming your best self. Fortunately, the world is becoming more and more attuned to uniqueness, to celebrating everything that makes us all a bit different—so ignoring those quirks that make you stand out is a mistake. I never tried to put myself in a box, or attempted to “fit in,” because I really only knew how to play myself. I think this is because my parents instilled so much self-confidence in me and constantly reassured me that I was just great as I was. I’m so proud of who I am, and I owe it all to my family. They’re the essence of my being and the foundation of my story.

  And my story begins in the Bronx, where I was born to a Jewish father and an Italian mother. My parents met when they were teenagers at the neighborhood playground. Picture this: My father, complete with a giant Jew fro, approached my mother on roller skates and asked her to smell his hair. Herbal Essences had just hit the shelves, and he figured it would make an excellent impression. Apparently it did, because they’ve been married for more than thirty years.

  Though they theoretically grew up on the same block, my parents couldn’t have been from more different worlds. My father is from a small, traditional Jewish family, whereas my mom is from a huge Italian clan (I have nineteen younger cousins on one side alone). My parents are more complementary than similar—but they’re best friends, regardless. My mother is a retired nurse, and I get my emotional, nurturing side from her, as well as my ability to get through hard moments. She hasn’t always had an easy time. Her childhood was incredibly rough: She lost three of her six siblings, for one thing. And later, it wasn’t all roses either: When I was nineteen, she was diagnosed with uterine cancer. But while she has every reason to be upset about the things she’s gone through, she’s never played the victim. She’s the most loving and caring and strong woman and is always taking care of everyone else.

  Meanwhile, my father, a former deli owner, is an incredibly hard worker who is always hustling. He’s also a jokester and makes everything fun. He gave me his work ethic and his ability to make something out of nothing. When I was in high school, he sold his deli and got into real estate, and vastly improved our lives: He’s one of those guys who will always go after what he wants and would never think to passively stand around and wait for opportunity to knock. He will meet someone at a party and close a real estate deal twenty minutes later; when we shared a box with Slash at the Super Bowl, he pitched himself so hard as a potential backup singer for Guns N’ Roses (he has no musical background but was determined that they should collaborate), I really thought Slash might make room for him in the band. Whether he’s serious or kidding around, my dad lives his life without fear and has no shame about putting himself out there. His philosophy is that nobody is going to come to you, begging you to take a job (or in my case, a role). I learned to stay on my toes from him. Because of this, if you were to meet me, you’d think I didn’t actually have a job. I’m always putting myself out there; I’m never complacent; I’m never passive; I’m always looking for the next opportunity. My dad taught me how to hustle.

  I’M ALWAYS PUTTING MYSELF OUT THERE; I’M NEVER COMPLACENT, I’M NEVER PASSIVE; I’M ALWAYS LOOKING FOR THE NEXT OPPORTUNITY. MY DAD TAUGHT ME HOW TO HUSTLE.

  When I was four, my parents decided that they didn’t want me to become hardened by city life, and so we moved from the Bronx to a more pastoral stretch of New Jersey. It was there that a bizarre but wonderful twist of fate led me to be cast on Broadway (more on that later). The term stage parents makes my skin crawl, but my mom and dad were pretty much the opposite of the cliché. For one, it was never part of their plan. They would never have guessed in a million years when they had Lea Michele Sarfati on August 29, 1986, that she would work on Broadway and go on to be on a TV show in Los Angeles. They were completely unassuming about the entire thing. They were just a deli owner and a full-time nurse, whose sole ambition was to raise a happy and healthy daughter. They didn’t wear my early success as a badge, and they didn’t live vicariously through me—it was my thing, and they did not step into my spotlight. My acting career was just this extracurricular activity that I did and that made me happy, and my apparent delight in it was enough of a reason for them to let me keep doing it. The fact that they never applied any pressure, and never supplied an agenda for me, i
s why I’m still acting and singing today. I would be nothing without my upbringing: The color and texture it has supplied is why I am who I am—and not to oversimplify things, but it’s because I’m not like all the other girls that I’ve gotten to where I am today.

  Family vacation with my mom and dad.

  As the little girl in Ragtime, my second Broadway show.

  My dad and Slash at the Super Bowl.

  My mom and Aunt Carmela at my baptism.

  * * *

  FINDING ROLE MODELS

  When I was growing up, nobody on the popular television shows looked like me. My favorite show was Saved by the Bell, and while I adored all of the kids in those high school halls, I couldn’t see myself in any of them. I’m sure people would expect that would make a girl sad, but my mom made sure that I saw there was a world outside of basic cable. She was always playing old movies like West Side Story and Funny Girl, which is how I came to discover women like Natalie Wood and Barbra Streisand. (In fact, my parents used to tell me that I seemed like I could be the love child of Jim Carrey and Natalie Wood.) Seeing those women act brought out a light inside of me and made me feel so alive: There was something about them that reminded me of myself. I was gawky and awkward like Barbra but understood that she was still considered beautiful, which I found so comforting. When I watched Funny Girl, it totally resonated with me that Barbra’s sense of humor is the thing that makes her so attractive. And once I eventually realized I could sing, Natalie and Barbra spoke to me even more: I wanted to do what they did. I would reenact the scene in West Side Story when Maria stands over Tony’s body constantly. While some of my friends were living in the world of 90210 with cute boys and tons of hairspray, I was living in the world of The Wizard of Oz with singing trees and ruby slippers. One of the things about Glee that’s so great is that it presents a high school world that’s so varied, so wonderfully odd, so multicolored and dimensional, that I know kids everywhere can see themselves reflected back. Search the world for a role model until you find someone who resonates with your soul: It’s so important, and so comforting, to have lampposts in this world who can light the way.

  THE DAY I MET BARBRA

  In January 2011, Barbra Streisand was honored at the Grammys, and as is the tradition there was a MusiCares benefit on her behalf a few nights before the ceremony. I was invited to sing, since my love for Barbra is pretty well-known, which was incredibly exciting. There was a plethora of incredibly talented musicians on the roster, who were all doing renditions of her songs: Faith Hill, Stevie Wonder, Seal … and so I sang “My Man,” from Funny Girl, which is my favorite song in the entire world. And there she was in the audience, right in front of me. I was incredibly nervous—there was nothing that could have fully prepared me to sing in front of my idol—but I was so honored and happy to be on that stage that I just powered through my performance.

  I was hoping to meet her that night, but she was surrounded by a sea of people, and as I made my way toward her, her team whisked her away. I figured I had lost my chance forever.

  I attended the Grammys a few nights later because I was presenting an award; Barbra sang four songs that night, and “Evergreen,” which I love, was one of them. It was the first time I had ever heard her sing live. I left the Grammys early, in order to avoid the post-event valet rush, and was standing there in the quiet before the storm waiting for my car when I felt a tap on my shoulder. I turned around, and it was Barbra. And she said, “I just wanted to say thank you for introducing me to your generation.” And I gave her a big hug and told her that I thought she was amazing, and she looked at me and asked, “Did I sound good tonight?” And I said, “You were incredible.” And that was it. The minute she walked away, I started to cry hysterically. Sometimes you meet your idols and they don’t live up to your expectations, but that moment was one of the best in my life. As soon as my car pulled up I called Ryan Murphy to tell him that it was over: I had met Barbra and didn’t need to be in this business anymore. All my dreams had come true.

  Sometimes you meet your idols, and they don’t live up to your expectations, but that moment was one of the best in my life.

  This past November, Chris Colfer and I went to see her at the Hollywood Bowl with Dante Di Loreto, one of the producers from Glee. It was a gorgeous night to sit under the stars and listen to Barbra; she sounded so beautiful and seemed so relaxed. Chris and I held hands the entire time and cried, especially when she sang “Happy Days Are Here Again,” which Chris and I sang on Glee together and performed during all the Glee concert tours. At the end of the concert Chris wanted us to go backstage to say hi, but I didn’t want to mar my perfect moment of meeting Barbra at the Grammys. Plus, the mere idea of being in her presence makes me extremely nervous. So I chickened out. A few weeks later, I checked my mail and Barbra had sent me a copy of that night’s program with a note on it that said: “Thank you for coming to my show, I wish you would have come backstage, I would have liked to have given you a hug.” And then I really died.

  * * *

  A Few of My Favorite Things

  Funny Girl: I love the story of a woman who struggles between love and her career. Plus, the music is just incredible.

  Almost Famous: My parents grew up in a culture of concerts—they went to tons. And from that, my father has a deep classic rock obsession … Black Sabbath, Pink Floyd, the Who. This was the musical vocabulary of my childhood. Almost Famous really brings that era to life, and also just happens to have a great story and some incredible acting by Kate Hudson.

  Jagged Little Pill: When I was first cast on Broadway, my mother took me to the Virgin Megastore to get me a gift for landing the role. I bought Jagged Little Pill, which changed my life: Alanis Morissette’s voice felt and sounded like a different world—a world I had never heard before. It just resonated with my soul.

  Spring Awakening: I know it’s silly to say that a thing I happened to be involved with is one of my favorite things, but Spring Awakening was a huge part of my life from the ages of fourteen to twenty-two (more on this in the next chapter). I grew up with Spring Awakening and will always feel incredibly connected to the music. To this day, whenever I need some emotional therapy, I put on my headphones and listen to “And Then There Were None,” “Blue Wind,” and “Don’t Do Sadness.”

  Les Miserables: Even if I hadn’t been in Les Mis, I’d still think it’s such an incredible musical.

  The Light in the Piazza: I was desperate to be in this Broadway show, but I was deemed too ethnic to play the role of Clara. When I went to see it, I remember sitting in the audience and feeling like it was such an impressive example of why I do what I do.

  Once: The music in Once is so incredible. When I was in Amsterdam in 2012, I walked around and listened to the soundtrack on repeat. The show (which was first a movie) is really the perfect package and is yet another example of the sort of piece that makes me proud to be an actor.

  With Kate at the Glee season 4 premiere. Had the best time working with her on the show and feel so honored to now call this incredibly talented and strong woman a friend.

  FAVORITE COMFORT FOOD

  Italian Comfort Soup

  This is a frill-free soup that’s both healthy and comforting. It requires minimal work, too!

  3 tablespoons olive oil (enough to cover the bottom of the pot)

  2 or 3 carrots, chopped

  4 stalks celery, chopped

  2 or 3 cloves garlic, minced

  ½ onion, chopped

  4 cups organic vegetable broth

  1 or 2 pinches of salt

  1 or 2 pinches of pepper

  Pinch of red pepper flakes (or to taste)

  Juice of 3 lemons

  3 or 4 unpeeled russet potatoes, cubed

  1 bunch kale, de-stemmed and chopped

  2 15-ounce cans lentils

  Parmesan cheese, for serving

  1. Cover the bottom of a pan with the olive oil and turn the heat to medium.

  2. Add the car
rots, celery, garlic, onion, and a pinch of salt and pepper and sauté until the vegetables are soft and tender, 5 to 8 minutes.

  3. In a separate pot, bring the vegetable broth to a boil, then reduce the heat to low.

  4. Add the sautéed vegetables to the broth and cook on low for 30 minutes.

  5. Add a bit more salt and pepper, the red pepper flakes, and lemon juice to taste.

  6. Add the potatoes and cook for 15 minutes.

  7. Stir in the kale and lentils and cook for an additional 15 minutes.

  8. Grate some Parmesan cheese (or vegan cheese) on top and serve!

  A WELL-ROUNDED LIFE

  I spent a lot of time in the car when I was kid, ferrying between school and home, New Jersey and Broadway. It was exciting and wonderful but had its downsides, too, as I wasn’t really able to forge deep relationships with friends. Everyone at school was nice and made room for me in their social groups when I was around, but after school, when it was prime socialization time, I was off to work. And in my community, Bar and Bat Mitzvahs were the end-all be-all—I made it to only a few of them. It was before those big nights that the girls got together and figured out what they were going to wear and how they were going to do their hair (which, funnily enough, usually involved flat-ironing all their gorgeous Jewish curls away), and it was at those parties that everyone let loose, that boys danced with girls, that memories were made. During the candle-lighting component of the event, the Bar Mitzvah boy, or Bat Mitzvah girl, would dedicate their candles to their closest friends. That could never be me: I wasn’t on their sports teams, I wasn’t hanging out at the mall with them after school, I wasn’t cramming with them for math tests and English exams.