Little Dove
Page 23
She needed to be more present.
“I can’t wait,” said the lithe blonde. She had scars covering a great deal of her body. She looked at Columbia’s and smiled, a shared moment between the two of them. Scars were normal here; these girls were normal in spite of what they’d survived.
“Thank you,” said the other, a small dark haired girl with a crisp British accent.
“Any time,” Columbia said and walked into the house in search of food.
She’d been constantly hungry since her return, and she knew Dimitri approved of more than a few extra pounds. As long as she could fight and protect herself, she didn’t mind having soft curves for him to explore when she was ready again.
She stood up and closed the door of the massive stainless steel fridge. It had always seemed ridiculous, to have one that large for the three of them and their small staff. Now she was happy to have it, ten more people had followed them home. They were promised a chance at a new life, to train and fight and possibly become part of a group to take down human traffickers.
She and Dimi hadn’t discussed it, but she wasn’t going to stop him from forming the group. Her captivity had only made her more determined to rage against the ones who bought and sold human lives as easily as livestock.
She set a huge brick of cheese on the counter and sliced a chunk off. She threw it on a freshly baked dinner roll and microwaved it for a few seconds.
It was bizarre, to have such easy access to this food while she’d been starved only a short time ago.
She took a huge bite, turned around and Dimi was watching her.
She chewed and swallowed, more like a gulp really, and laughed. “How long have you been watching me?”
“Since you came in. You’re beautiful.”
“I am not, I’m half sun burnt and I’m getting fat from all this cheese.”
He crossed the kitchen and pinched her arm lightly. “I love this body, eat as much cheese as you want if it means you are this sexy.”
“You always know what to say,” she said and leaned up to kiss him. He didn’t care that she still had crumbs on her lips; he pulled her close and claimed her mouth, like the old days.
She melted and let herself go, fall into it and feel his body pressing against hers.
Her pussy started to warm up and she had an overwhelming urge to fuck him, her man, her saviour, her love.
“Take me to our bedroom,” she said.
He swooped her up in his arms and pantomimed dropping her. She slapped him lightly and they laughed together.
Like old times.
For this moment, she felt a door open and her carefree, happy self peered out.
She did love him, she did want him and she did want to be with him, happy and laughing, fucking and loving.
He nudged the door open with his foot and turned around to kick it shut.
“Aren’t you going to lock it?” she asked.
“Fuck that, anybody who disturbs us is dead, they know that.”
He set her on the bed and stood above her, letting his gaze travel the length of her body.
“My god, I love you,” he said. His voice sounded thick with unspoken emotion, the words he’d never said to her, the questions he’d never asked.
She felt uncertain, like she’d forgotten what to do now. She sat up and dragged him to her, her fingers tucked in the waistband of his trousers. He was dressed for business; he’d been on Skype with an associate. He was wearing a crisp white linen shirt with black custom tailored pants. She realized that he was fucking hot.
This made her smile. Her Dimi was amazingly hot, and she was going to enjoy it.
He looked down at her, a tower of flesh, bone, bulging muscle and sinewy strength.
She looked up from under her lashes, knowing how much he loved this angle.
“I want to suck your cock,” she said, “I’ve missed it.”
He stroked her hair and wavered, just a small moment, but she saw his doubt. “Are you okay with this?” he asked.
“I am more than okay, I fucking want you,” she said. She realized she needed to reassure him; he truly did need her. She seemed so fragile now, he was probably afraid of hurting her. He needed her direction.
He groaned and grabbed her chin. She didn’t break eye contact as she undid the button and unzipped his pants. She pulled them down and stroked his hard cock with her hand, all the while looking at him.
He was watching her, his eyes filling with lust, he was losing his uncertainty and she was getting hotter.
She stared at him, opened her mouth and took his cock between her lips. Her eyelids fluttered, not out of a need to close them, but out of pure desire. She’d forgotten how much she wanted this, wanted him.
She slipped her lips down his shaft, felt him reach the back of her throat, and pushed harder. She gagged, but hid it, not wanting him to stop.
“Fuuuuuck,” he exhaled and she looked up at him again. His face was a mask of pure bliss, his eyes burned with desire and his words were filled with love. “Columbia…little dove…fuck I’ve missed this. I haven’t come since you…were taken. I haven’t been able to find release. My body won’t respond unless it’s you on the end of my cock.”
She moved faster along his shaft, he wove his hands in her hair and held her tight.
He fucked her face. Like the old days.
She felt herself heating up, her pussy was throbbing and she slipped a finger into her panties to touch herself while she sucked him off.
“That’s it,” he said in a low, husky voice, “play with your clit. I want you to come when I flood your throat. Fuck, you’re beautiful.”
The last words were punctuated with a hard thrust, she felt his cock pulse and she knew he was close.
She rubbed her clit and held his shaft with the other hand, while sucking and deep throating his nine inches. She felt herself relax, flood with pleasure and start to let go.
Like the old days.
The days when all she cared about was getting his cock inside of her, any time and place.
The days before she’d been taken.
The days before she’d lost…
She stiffened up and dropped her groove, felt oddly detached and ashamed at what she was doing.
Dimitri stopped pumping her mouth and looked down at her, a question on his face.
She knew this must have been taking every ounce of effort he had to stop, to gauge her feelings and not press on in spite of her sudden reluctance.
How could she use her body for pleasure, hers and his, when it couldn’t even house a baby?
She felt sick to her stomach and remembered the blanket she left, threw on the floor. Stiffened with blood…and her fetus. Their fetus.
Their baby.
She started to cry and pushed him off her, out of her mouth. He was so confused and she didn’t know where to begin, what to tell him. She wanted to curl in a ball on the bed and sob until she had nothing left.
She had nothing to give; she deserved nothing.
“What’s wrong, love?” Dimitri asked her. He sat on the bed next to her, his cock softening. She felt guilty over that as well, being unable to fulfill him with her body.
She wanted to turn away, pull away, run from his kindness, his love.
She wanted to drag a knife across her abdomen, exorcise the demons that had followed her from that prison cell, the demons that were haunting her and wouldn’t leave her alone.
She wanted to tear her hair and scream at the ocean, walk into the waves and never return.
She wanted away from him, with every fibre of her being and every cell in her body.
She had lost their baby, and she would never be whole again.
But she didn’t, some spark of defiance inside of her kept her there, the part that loved Dimitri more than she loved herself. The part that loved them together and knew Dimitri needed her more than she needed to be gone.
She cried with her head on his shoulder, he let her. He spoke kin
d words and let her sob until she had nothing left.
But once there were no more tears left, she felt something deep inside of her. A tickle of a thought, something half formed wanting to come out, a seed growing.
An idea that she had to share everything with him. Something Nico had said added fuel to her defiant little fire. She had to share this with Dimitri in order to heal from it, grow from it and become better for having shared it with him.
The idea that she needed to give him her sorrow so they could work through it together.
Without moving her head, she felt her tears drying. She dared herself to say it, thought about what she would say, what she would tell him.
Finally she said, “I’m sorry, Dimi. I killed it. I killed our baby. I was so foolish, I should have never gone to Vienna, I should have never put it in danger like that.”
He went still, his hand stopped stroking her hair and his arms went stiff.
She thought this is it; this is where he tells me I’m a monster.
This is where my dream ends and I lose the man I love.
CHAPTER THIRTY-TWO
IOANA
She was going to die. After everything she’d survived, this was it. She was going to die.
“She’s too tired to go on,” Albu said to Boian. They hadn’t had time to get her anywhere when the pains had started. And truth be told, they hadn’t the money to take her to a hospital for the care she and the baby would need.
For all his posturing and strength and the people who worshipped him, her Orphan King had nothing. Nothing useful for a baby, at any rate. He could dine for free at the restaurants he protected, he could stroll into any number of groceries and help himself, food in exchange for not having his people target their customers.
He had power and connections, but no money and no hospital.
Romania had state funded free healthcare, but everyone knew if you couldn’t afford to grease the palms of those in charge, you ran the risk of picking up Hep C, staph infection…or worse. They’d decided to not take the chance and have the baby here, in their home, under the ground. It had seemed like a good idea at the time, but now she regretted their choice.
She felt another contraction rip through her, her abdomen rippled and she screamed, not giving a fuck at this point to care who heard her.
“Do something,” Boian said, his voice pleading with Albu and the midwife who was attending with him. The midwife had more experience with delivering cattle, as they’d found out too late, and Albu was more adept at stitching people back together, not bringing new ones into the world.
Ioana could feel her body give up. It was a strange sensation, after hanging onto her rage to make it through beatings and rapes and being tortured, ten hours trying to push this baby out was the thing that made her lose it all.
She wanted to close her eyes, to stop fighting and just rest. Just let her body rest.
“We’re going to lose her,” Albu said, “we can take her to Colţea Hospital, it’s the closest. We might be able to get a room. How much do you have?”
“Not enough,” Boian said. She heard the fear that cracked his voice, which made him sound like a very young man indeed. A young man about to lose his first child, and possibly the woman he’d just found again. “Hang on,” he said, “I have an idea.”
She opened her eyes and saw him pull out his phone. Always money for gadgets, never for important stuff, she thought. Such is the way of today’s world.
He seemed to be texting somebody. She watched his finger flash across the touch screen and wondered who it was. She didn’t have enough energy to ask, so she closed her eyes once more.
*****
She didn’t know how much time had passed, but she knew the situation was getting worse. The baby wasn’t kicking as much, and she could feel a part of it lodged in her birth canal. She felt hot and feverish, but couldn’t stop shaking.
Boian wasn’t around, she called for him but nobody seemed to hear her. Albu was sitting at the end of the bed on his phone, and the shitty midwife was sleeping in the corner, her legs splayed out and her head propped back, snoring.
“Let’s get her moved,” Boian said as he rushed back into their room. “I’ve got the money.”
“How?” Albu asked and two paramedics entered with a stretcher in tow. They looked around the richly furnished space and laughed, neither had been down this far, nor ever picked somebody up from such a strange location.
“Dimitri,” Boian replied. “I finally took him up on his offer.”
Ioana smiled and didn’t struggle as they moved her to the stretcher. She knew it was hard on her love, to accept the older man’s money, but this would be good for his soul. Part of the reason he’d denied the money had been simple pride, of course. But the other, deeper part had been anger at his mother, Sanda.
The money felt like he was forgiving her, the money felt like she was finally helping him. The money felt like he would have to shed his past and look towards his own family, let go of the hurt and anger that had driven him to become the leader in this strange underground world in the first place.
And he needed to do just that in order to create something of a life with her and their baby.
She was lifted and carried out of their room into the great hall that served as the gathering place for those living under the city. Hundreds of people lurked about, hoping to catch a glimpse of her, to wish her and the baby good luck.
She’d become somewhat of a recluse since being back, the press of people and demands of the crowds were too much for her most days. She preferred the solitude of their private quarters, and the beautiful little paradise Boian had created for her upon her return.
Once she was loaded up in the ambulance, they raced through the streets with sirens on blast. She drifted in and out, shifted as the baby pushed against her, and held onto Boian’s hand the entire time.
“You’re going to be okay,” he told her and rubbed her fingers. “I should have called them sooner. I should have taken the fucking money.”
“Don’t hate yourself,” she said, surprised at how small her voice was. “We’ve both done foolish things.”
“You know I’ve forgiven you everything,” he replied and looked down at her. The flashing lights flicked across his face, lighting his amazing eyes and giving him an almost mythological glow.
“You look so sexy right now,” she said and he laughed. She couldn’t help herself; the oxygen the paramedic had given her was making her head feel loose. She focused on how much she loved him and how lucky she was to have found him the first time, and how utterly blessed she was to have him for the second time.
“You’re a nut,” he said and kissed her lips, not passionately but with purpose. “I love you. I love our baby, and we’re going to make it through this.”
She looked over his shoulder and saw an angel watching her. It was gone in a flash, and she thought it must have been the lights.
Still, she couldn’t shake the feeling that they weren’t alone.
Once at the hospital, they were pushed through Emergency and taken to a private room immediately. Boian looked almost ashamed as he watched the doctors evaluate her.
They were grumbling about how stupid he was for not bringing her in earlier, and if he could afford this room, he should have had a better plan for his wife and child.
He said nothing, which was a miracle in itself, for she knew how quick his temper could be.
This experience seemed to have humbled him, and in terms of being a father and a lover, this was a good thing…but she hoped he would forget about it when it came to managing his people. They needed a strong, decisive leader.
“She’s too far gone for a caesarian,” the doctor finally told Boian. “The baby’s already come out partially, but it’s breeched. That means it’s backwards. We have to move it and get it out of there before we lose them both.”
Ioana watched his face and loved him for the fear and concern he showed. “Yes, please do what
you must. If they both live, there will be a very large reward for your entire staff,” he said. The doctor’s face brightened and he started to order everybody into their planned places.
Ioana hadn’t said much since they had gotten to the hospital, she felt like if she spoke too soon she would attract the attention of that angel she’d seen. Best keep quiet and let the doctor’s do their work.
When a contraction ripped through her, she couldn’t help it, she screamed. She hadn’t felt it coming and was overcome with agony when it hit.
The medical team moved faster after that, setting up machines and gathering equipment.
“Come on,” Boian said, “she’s in so much pain, do something!”
“We are doing what we can,” the doctor said, positioning himself at the end of the table, between her legs.
He prodded her vagina and pushed her legs wider. He moved a light in position and inspected her closely.
“This might hurt,” he told Boian, “please hold her hand and keep her still.”
Boian gripped her harder and leaned in close. “You can do this,” he said, “you’ve lived through so much, this is one more bump in the road.”
Ioana nodded at him and felt tears leaking from her eyes.
“Come on, my love,” he whispered, “hang in there for a few moments longer. Then we can meet our son.”
They’d been arguing about the gender for the last month. She was certain it was a girl; Boian convinced it was a boy. Both of them, she knew, just wanted it to live at this point.
She felt the doctor’s hand slip inside of her, he attempted to push the baby’s foot back into her womb, and she felt her uterus press against her insides. She couldn’t help herself, hot piss leaked out of her, all over the doctor and the examining table. She closed her eyes, hoping Boian hadn’t noticed.
The doctor yelled for the nurse to clean it up, and Boian whispered, “You’re going to be okay, beautiful girl, my love.”
She opened her eyes and found his. She focused on them as the doctor tried to force her baby around inside. He had one hand inside her and one hand firmly planted on her belly.