Because I Love You 2

by A'zayler

  I leaned forward and rested my arms on my knees so that I was closer to him. “Tell me this first, do you think this is what you need to do for your family, or is it something you need to do for the streets?”

  “My family? I ain’t got no family down here.”

  “Azayna and Zon.”

  My face was straight as I waited for him to sort his thoughts out enough to give me a logical answer. With Egypt, I knew this question would be way more complex than it had to be because, in so many ways, he was just like me. He had to think about shit in order to determine its meaning and how much value it held. Some things he got right off, and others he had to ponder on.

  The whole Azayna and Zon comment had thrown him for a loop like I’d known it would. Egypt was accustomed to being a loner, not caring about anybody but himself. He’d been that way since his mother passed, his best friend got knocked, and his sister moved away. I’d done my best to bridge the gap wherever he’d needed me to, but there was still some of him that remained blocked off.

  The moment I tagged other people on him, his mind went blank. He’d thought he had it all figured out like he always did, but this time was different. It wasn’t just him anymore; he had two additional lives to think about.

  “You have to move differently when your actions affect more than just you,” I spoke solemnly. “So, again, is killing Master what’s best for your family or what’s best for the streets?”

  He pushed some of his hair from his face. “I guess the streets.”

  “Why?”

  “Because the streets don’t tolerate disrespect.”

  I nodded. “Have you discussed this with Azayna?”

  I knew before he shook his head and said hell no that he hadn’t. Master might have been a lot of shit to us, but Azayna loved him. He’d been all she’d had for years, and the bond she shared with Egypt would surely be tainted if he did something to Master.

  “Do you plan to?”

  “Nah, it ain’t really her business. I can waste the nigga and keep it to myself. She probably wouldn’t care anyway. She was trying to fight Myeisha the other day. I had to stop her. She knows it’s some foul shit cooking.”

  I was about to respond to him when Zebrina’s presence stopped me. She was in front of me with a bottle of water. She twisted the cap off and drank some before handing it to me.

  “Drink it up.”

  She smiled and finished the bottle off. “I be so thirsty.”

  Instead of saying anything, I pulled her down so that she was seated on my lap. I kissed her shoulder a few times before looking at her face.

  “I just wanted to see was y’all hungry.”

  “No, thanks,” Egypt answered.

  “I could eat a li’l something.”

  She grabbed my face and kissed me hard. “Me too! I’m about to make us some burgers.”

  I pecked her lips and touched her back when she stood up to leave me. I watched her walk away before looking back at Egypt.

  “See, Azayna and I don’t have what you and Zebrina got. If we did, I might think about things differently, but we rocky as shit. Ain’t nothing really solid about our relationship right now.”

  I ignored every foolish thing that had just left Egypt’s mouth. “You love her?”

  He shrugged then nodded, then shrugged again.

  “Love isn’t unsure.”

  “Well, yeah.”

  “I knew that, and so did you. You’ll never get what Zebrina and I have if you don’t buckle down and realize what you have. The entire time you were gone, Azayna stayed to herself, only chilling with Zebrina and me. Some days she would be with Pat them, but she wasn’t heavy with anyone because she was true to you. That type of shit doesn’t come lightly, so you need to wake up and own what’s yours.” I sat back in my chair again and stretched my leg out in front of me. “Life is too short to waste your blessings.”

  He nodded, and we both sat quietly for a minute, not saying anything. Just enjoying the warm weather and the comfort of being able to think along with company. I didn’t know about Egypt, but I knew the only thing on my mind was my family. I’d been doing the street shit long enough, and I was ready for something new. Being in the hood didn’t do anything but bring about bad energy. Honestly, I’d had enough.

  “One day, E, I’ma get my girl and leave all this shit behind.” I looked around the beautiful scenery of my backyard. “I’m not looking back either.”

  He exhaled so hard that I heard it. “I be thinking about moving to Atlanta with my sister. She asks me all the time. I just don’t know because I’m Dade County born and raised. Blood is all I know.”

  “You’re young.” I chuckled. “You have enough time to learn something else.” I hit his hand to get his attention. “You ever thought about God?”

  He nodded quickly with a small frown on his face. “All the time, especially since I almost died. It be on me real hard. Then, get this, you know all about the dream I had in the hospital and shit. Why they told me that they told y’all I was dead. That shit was so crazy because all of this time, I’d been thinking it was a dream when clearly, it was more. Like a sign from God or something.” He laughed to himself. “That’s really the only reason why I haven’t already killed that nigga Master.”

  I fell out laughing because though I respected what he’d been saying about checking with me first, I knew there had to be something else to keep him from acting on it as soon as he found out about Master being behind it. Egypt had been a hot head since I’d known him. Even with him heeding to my discretion, Egypt did he what he wanted.

  “I knew it was something keeping that Mac in the holster.”

  We shared a brief laugh.

  “Hell yeah. I wanted to kill him that night, but I didn’t really want to do it like that. I feel conflicted, like I need to do it, but I don’t want to.”

  “Who’s making you?”

  He shook his head as if to say nobody.

  “Well then, get your girl and dip. Fuck that nigga. God spared your life. Take it and do something with it.”

  He looked at me for a long time, probably trying to decide what he was going to do. The next time he said something, Zebrina was on her way out of our house with a plate of food in her hand. She set it down and went about her way again.

  “I don’t know if I can do that.”

  “Well,” I bit my burger. “Do what you feel you need to do. I’ma back you either way.”

  The patio went quiet again before Egypt stood to his feet with his hand outstretched for me to dap him up. After slapping our palms together, he told me he’d holla at me later with his decision and left. I watched him walk around the side of the house while praying for him. I didn’t know what he was going to decide; I just hoped it ended with him and his girl up in Atlanta with his sister. I hadn’t divulged my truest intentions to him, but my mind was already made up. I was about to wipe my hands of Dade County.

  “What you out here smiling for?” Zebrina took a seat on my lap.

  “It’s almost our time, baby.”

  Her smile mirrored mine as she pressed her forehead into mine. “I can’t wait, babe.”

  I pecked the middle of her chest while touching her stomach. “It won’t be long. That’s a promise.”

  Chapter Fifteen

  -Egypt

  “Ahhh, right there, don’t stop,” Azayna panted in my ear as I hovered over her, drilling her across the dining room table.

  Her legs were in the crook of my arm while I slammed into her deeper and deeper with each stroke. The whites of her eyes were all I could see as she continued to roll them. She was warm, wet, and exactly what I’d been craving all morning. After leaving BB’s house, I’d hit the block to pick up some cash and came straight to my girl.

  There was so much on my mind that I could hardly focus. I’d thought I had it all mapped out until I talked to BB. His words had been heavy on my mind and my heart. Part of me wished I hadn’t told him, but then there was the sensible
part of me that wanted to be better for Azayna and our son that was worrying me to death. All I kept hearing was my mother’s voice asking me was I ready to die.

  “Egypt,” Azayna moaned and clasped my shirt in her hands. “Egyyyyppttt,” she called my name again.

  I looked down to see her staring at me. I blew her an air kiss and continued driving into her. She was feeling it, I could tell because she hadn’t been able to say or do much since I’d entered her.

  “Tell me you love me.”

  “Oh.” She scrunched her face up. “I love you.”

  “How much?”

  “Too much.” She pulled me down onto her.

  I did my best to keep stroking without smashing her stomach. It was serving as a major barrier between us, but I welcomed it. My son was just making his way into our lives, making room for himself wherever he could, and I loved it.

  “Move away with me.”

  Her eyes found mine. I stared down at her with a straight face, no doubt, no second-guessing, no fear. She would either say yes or no. I’d determine my next choice on her answer.

  “Okay.”

  I slammed into her and pulled her leg up so that it was resting on my shoulder. “We’re never coming back, aight?”

  “That’s… co—cool.” She squinted.

  “I might marry you too, aight?”

  She nodded and started with all that crying shit. Her tears rolled down the side of her face as she moved her body in sync with mine. I didn’t say anything after my impromptu command, but I meant what I’d said. It was still early in the daytime. The moment we got our nut and cleaned up, I was mapping this shit out with her. BB was right. I needed to grow up and stop sleeping on my blessings.

  “Egypt, I’m about to cum, bae.”

  “Do it then.” I looked down and eased out some so I could watch her do it.

  At the first thump of her body, I closed my eyes and slid deeper. She was moaning like crazy before squeezing my arms and yelling. I rode her wave with her, giving her too many more strokes to count before I followed suit and released.

  With both of us breathing hard and sweating profusely, we lay together, a tired mess of each other. Her tapping my arm made me move first. I slid out, pulling her up along the way.

  “You for real?” She pushed her locs back over her shoulder. “About us getting married?”

  “Yeah, one day.” I pecked her lips. “Go take a shower, and let’s ride somewhere right quick.”

  She smiled, looking pretty as hell, and I kissed her. We stayed with our mouths locked together for another few minutes before pulling away and getting our minds back right. I wasn’t sure what the future had in store for us, but I didn’t really care. Whatever life brought our way, we’d just have to tough it out together.

  It didn’t take us long to get ready because she was dressed simply, and I hadn’t thrown on much either. On the way to the jewelry store, she grabbed my hand in the car and rubbed it.

  “Is something about to happen, Egypt?”

  I looked at her quickly before looking back at the road. “Nah, why?”

  “I don’t know. You just came home all riled up, not really talking to me but pulling my clothes off. Then the talk about leaving and getting married. I just want to make all of it make sense.”

  I kissed the back of her hand. “It’s some stuff on my mind, but it’s nothing I can’t handle.”

  “You sure?”

  I nodded.

  “My daddy told me you found out who shot your car up.” Her voice was low. “Did you do something to them? Are you about to go to jail?”

  I was baffled as to why Pat would tell her that shit, but I guess I could appreciate the fact that he hadn’t told her who it was. He and I both knew how that was going to play out with her.

  “Nah.”

  “Egypt,” she snapped. “Stop being short with me and tell me what’s going on, please?”

  I pulled into the first parking spot I saw and turned the car off. I looked all around her before giving her my attention.

  “I’m about to make some major changes in our lives, that’s what’s about to happen. Now, you with it or you not?”

  She nodded. “I am.”

  “Let’s do it then.”

  Once we were both out of the car, we headed into the store. Together, we picked out her a cute little promise ring. She was so happy, you would have thought I was about to marry her right then. She hadn’t stopped smiling and kissing me since we’d walked into the store. Her being so happy made me happy too. So happy that I actually considered marrying her sooner rather than later. I just wasn’t quite ready for that yet, though. Mentally, I just wasn’t there. Even with me having love for her and wanting to keep her forever, being a husband still felt weird.

  “Can we please go to BB’s house so I can show Zebrina my ring?” She jumped up and down, pulling on my arm.

  “Aye, stop all that damn jumping,” I scolded her.

  She was still smiling when she rolled her eyes and returned to her regular walking. The rest of our ride went pretty much the same way. Her getting overly excited, and me having to calm her back down. By the time we pulled up to BB’s crib, she could hardly sit still, and I was tired of trying to make her.

  “Brina!” Azayna yelled before we could even get to the door.

  Since their screen door was open the same way it had been when I left, Zebrina’s smiling face appearing at the door hadn’t surprised me. She was still dressed casually in the tank top and shorts she’d had on earlier. I nodded at her just as BB stepped up behind her, pushing the door open so that we could come in.

  Our feet hadn’t even touched the first step when Azayna held her hand up, flashing the li’l ring I’d gotten her. It wasn’t much, but it had her face lit up like Christmas, so I guessed it would do.

  “Azaynaaaaa!” Zebrina screamed and ran to her.

  BB and I watched as they wrapped themselves together in an awkward hug. Azayna’s big belly ass was stopping any and all closeness. I shook my head at their dramatics. They were screaming like the shit was a real engagement ring.

  “Congratulations! When’s the big day?” She marveled at the ring on Azayna’s hand.

  “I don’t know, but Egypt said soon!” Azayna’s remark had them both screaming again.

  BB and I smiled too. “Li’l nigga, I ain’t say go propose to the girl.” He laughed while embracing me in a brotherly hug.

  “I didn’t. Hell, I thought it was a promise ring, but she’s so excited, I guess I might as well let it be whatever she wants to call it.” I shrugged. “It’ll be time soon.”

  He nodded and dapped me up again. “I’m proud of you. I’m assuming you thought about everything I said earlier?”

  I nodded. “Yeah, all of it, but I’ll hit you up about that later.”

  “So, what now?” Zebrina asked while looking at BB and me.

  “Shit, I don’t know. She already got all of her shit at my house, so it ain’t like we have to move in together. She’s pregnant, so that’s another thing we got checked off.” I chuckled. “I guess we just learn how to live together.”

  “That’s exactly what’s next. That and raising these damn babies.” BB’s hand went to Zebrina’s stomach.

  My eyes bucked while Azayna’s arm circled Zebrina’s neck, pulling her down to her height again. She was so busy jumping and yelling that we could barely hear what they were saying. Luckily, the smiles on their faces were so vibrant that we didn’t need to. Their happiness showed it all. Since we had nothing much left to do, we chilled there with the two of them for a few more hours.

  “What’s on your mind?” Azayna rubbed her hand up the back of my neck while looking into my face.

  She and I were laid out on the back porch with BB and Zebrina while they sat together playing cards. Azayna and I had long ago bowed out after getting beat for the millionth time and decided to just lay back and enjoy the weather. With her seated sideways in my lap, I was able to rub her bel
ly and see her face at the same time.

  I had so much on my mind that I honestly hadn’t even noticed she was looking at me. On top of trying to figure out what to do with Master, everything that BB had told me earlier about taking his girl and leaving had been sitting heavy on my heart. All I knew was Dade, nothing more. This was my life, but shit just hadn’t been the same for a while now.

  First, my mama left me, then my sister, then Auto. Had I not had BB all this time, I probably would have allowed myself to get caught up in the streets and either died or went to jail too. His guidance hadn’t led me wrong yet, no matter how hard I’d been trying to buck against it, so if leaving was his choice, I didn’t see why it couldn’t be mine too.

  “Egypt.” Azayna’s mouth was now near my ear as she whispered.

  I rubbed my hand over her stomach when I felt my boy kicking. “What up?”

  “Can we just talk for a minute? Tell me what’s up with you, baby.”

  I exhaled and licked my lips before looking over at BB and Zebrina. They were both laughing and talking shit about their card game. An unforced smile crossed my face as I watched them. That was some serious love shit that they were on. I hadn’t seen anything like that since Logan and Auto, and even they weren’t as tight as BB and Zebrina.

  Auto had loved my sister to death, but he didn’t protect her from the streets and his life like BB did Zebrina. The way BB handled Zebrina should have gone down in some type of history book or something. It was just that tight. Inspiring, even.

  Versus answering Azayna’s nosey ass, I called BB’s name. He looked up with his hand stretched out to Zebrina.

  “What’ up?” He scooted back in his seat so that she could get comfortable on his lap.

  “Azayna said she down to dip with me and never come back.” I looked at her with a sly smirk on my face. “You think she ’bout it for real, or is she just hype off that ring?”

  She pushed my head as we chuckled lowly with Zebrina joining in. BB’s face remained serious as he looked us both over before speaking.

  “It’s a lot to ask of a person. I honestly don’t know.” He shrugged and stretched one of his legs out in front of him. “She might go, but she’ll probably be trying to come back at some point, especially since she just met her daddy and shit.”