“I didn’t come here to talk about marriage. I don’t want to talk about it.”
Frustrated, Lucas threw his hands helplessly up in the air. “Then talk to me about something else. What do you think about the room? They’re all pretty much like this one.”
How could she think about the room when his presence was filling every inch of it? “I think any child would enjoy making this room his or her own private little space.”
“Good.”
When he didn’t say more, Jenny nervously licked her lips, then darted a glance at him. “So now what?”
He gave a negligible little shrug as though he didn’t care what happened next. Yet Jenny could see tension in his stance, in the corded muscles on his neck and jaw.
“We could go look at the kitchen and dining room,” he said. But rather than make a move to leave the room, he continued to stand where he was, his eyes locked on her face.
Jenny’s heart lurched into an erratic gallop. “Is that what you want?”
Maybe it was the phrasing of her question, or maybe it was the hunger inside him that suddenly compelled Lucas to close the small gap between them and bare his true wants to her.
“Where you’re concerned, Jenny Prescott, I have several wants. The most immediate one is to make love to you.”
Even though that very thing had been consuming her mind, she hadn’t expected him to come out and say it so bluntly. The fact that he had sent a tingling rush through her body.
Seconds passed as Lucas’s face hovered just above hers. His brown eyes probed deeply into her green ones. Jenny’s ears began to roar as though she was going to faint. Fearing her knees would betray her, she reached out and grabbed the front of his white shirt.
“That wasn’t very subtle,” she finally murmured.
The hint of a dimple appeared in his cheek. As Jenny watched his eyelids droop, her heart began to pound harder and harder. Heat pooled deep within her and sent flames of color to her face.
“You’re a cop,” he said. “You don’t sugarcoat anything. Why should I?” His hands came up to gently frame her face. “Besides, we both know we’ve been skirting around the issue for a long time now.”
Unknowingly, her hands relaxed their grip on his shirt and flattened against his chest. He felt warm and hard and so wonderfully masculine. She moved her hands ever so slightly against him.
“The issue being?” she asked, her voice a soft invitation.
Groaning, he pulled her into his arms. “This, among other things,” he said roughly, then fastened his mouth over hers.
At the moment Jenny was too mesmerized to resist him. She opened her mouth and met the swift invasion of his tongue against hers.
Lucas wrapped his arms around her waist and hugged her tightly against him. Jenny’s hands slid around his back, then moved upward to anchor a grip on both his shoulders.
As his lips hungrily fed on hers, his tongue continued to explore the ribbed roof of her mouth and the sharp edge of her teeth. In response, Jenny bit and nibbled and tasted the sweet mystery of him.
It was anything but a gentle kiss. It was hungry and hot and so consuming that Jenny felt totally drugged by the time Lucas lifted his head and his breath fanned against her cheeks.
“Tell me you didn’t like that,” he dared beneath a ragged breath.
“I did like it.”
“Tell me you don’t want me,” he persisted.
Her eyelids fluttered open, and she groaned at the sight of his lips only a fraction away from hers. “I do want you, Lucas. I don’t want to. But I do.”
He looked at her, his eyes full of wonder and love, then he lifted her into his arms and carried her to the narrow bed.
He lay her on the mattress, then followed her down, his lips once again locked onto hers. Jenny didn’t protest. She couldn’t. It had been a long time since she’d been the focus of a man’s desire. And even longer still since she’d felt desire herself. This man wanted her. And she wanted him. For the moment that was all she could think about.
With their bodies crushed together, Lucas wedged his fingers to the front of her sweater and began to push the tiny buttons through their buttonholes. Inch by inch, the pale pink sweater began to part until her naked breasts were exposed to him.
The fact that she wasn’t wearing a bra only added to Lucas’s conviction that he’d been right about Jenny all along. She wasn’t cold and dispassionate, as she believed. Beneath those cool blue uniforms she wore was a warmblooded woman.
“Oh, Jenny, this is the way it should be between us,” he murmured, his head dipping to the sweet swell of her breast. “For now and always.”
How could Jenny argue when it felt so right, so exquisitely perfect to have him touching her, loving her this way?
Closing her eyes, she sighed as Lucas’s hands cupped the firm weight of her breast. His lips made a warm, moist trail around each budded nipple. Eventually, his teeth clamped gently over one hard peak. Fire shot through Jenny and her body arched against his, silently begging him to ease the ache he was building inside her.
Lucas’s hands slid beneath her skirt, up the silken softness of her thighs, then gripped her hips and tugged them against his. By then Jenny was panting, her head reeling with the raw desire to make love to him.
After a moment Lucas spoke against her cheek. “This is the way it’s going to be, Jenny. We’re going to be husband and wife. We’re going to make.love and have children. We’re going to be happy. So happy.”
Happy? As he kissed her again, the word whirled around in Jenny’s head like a strange mantra that frightened rather than soothed. She didn’t know what it was to be truly happy. And she’d be deluding him and herself if she believed she could be a happily-ever-after wife and mother.
Twisting her lips away from his, she pushed at his shoulders. Lucas immediately rolled off her. Snatching the edges of her sweater together, Jenny sat up and flung her hair out of her eyes.
“This is wrong, Lucas,” she gasped breathlessly.
His brow puckered as he took in her heaving breasts and pink lips. “Wrong? It felt damn right to me.”
She wiggled her way to the edge of the bed and swung her legs over the side. “Yes,” she murmured, painfully. “It felt right. But feelings aren’t enough for me.”
Desire was squeezing Lucas’s insides like a hot, heavy hand. He wanted to make love to her, show her how wonderful it could be between them. Yet here she was telling him that feelings weren’t enough for her. He wanted to ram his fist through the wall.
“What the hell is enough, Jenny? Don’t human wants and needs ever figure in your life? Or have you been a cop for so long you have to have cold hard facts to satisfy you?”
Glaring at him, she slid off the bed and looked around for her shoes, which had fallen off when he’d lifted her onto the bed. “That’s a rotten thing to say!”
“Rotten, but true, I think.”
Her teeth grinding together, she jabbed her feet into the black flats. “I don’t have to listen to this!”
Lucas rose from the bed. His eyes glinted like ice as they traveled over her angry face. “No,” he said, “you don’t have to listen to me, or make love to me. Marry me, have my children, or do any damn thing with me! You can go home by yourself and tomorrow you can strap on your revolver, pin on your badge and pretend that’s all you want out of life.”
Rage sizzled through her like a bolt of hot lightning. She flew at him instantly, and before she realized what she was about to do, her fist cracked solidly against his jaw.
Lucas remained stock-still, his face a rigid mask. Horrified, Jenny stared at him while her whole body began to shake.
What had come over her? Dear God, what sort of woman had she turned into?
Lifting her hand to his face, Jenny gently touched his reddening cheek. “Lucas, I’m—I’m so sorry,” she whispered with remorse. “I didn’t—I never meant to hurt you. I—”
Suddenly sobs were blocking her throat, ma
king it impossible to say more. With a muffled cry, she whirled away from him and ran out of the room.
Lucas caught up to her as she was about to leave the building. Grabbing her shoulders, he spun her around, then pinned her against the door.
“Let me go!” she sobbed. “Haven’t I shown you enough of me yet? Can’t you see that I’m not the woman for you? I’m—I’m not worth loving!”
Tears were streaming down her face and throat and soaking into the collar of her sweater. With his palms, Lucas wiped her cheeks, then cupped her chin.
“You pack a hell of a wallop, Jenny. And I’m not just talking about your right hook. I want you more than I’ve ever wanted any woman in life. And I don’t care if you break both my jaws and fight me till hell freezes over. You’re not going to change the way I feel about you. I love you. Don’t you understand? I love you!”
“No—you can’t! I don’t want you to love me!”
Desperate, Jenny wrenched away from his hold and shot through the door. Afraid he would follow, she ran down the sidewalk to her car, slid inside and quickly jabbed the key in the ignition. Once the engine started, she dared to look up.
Through a blur of hot tears she could see that the sidewalk was empty and the door to the Ray Lowrimore House remained closed. Drawing in a ragged breath of relief, Jenny jerked the car into gear and sped away from the curb.
A few blocks passed before she loosened her death grip on the steering wheel and wiped the tears from her face.
A glance in the rearview mirror assured her that Lucas wasn’t coming after her. No, Jenny thought, her heart as heavy as dull lead, Lucas wouldn’t come after her now. He was well and truly out of her life. And that was the way she wanted it. That was the way it was going to stay.
Chapter Nine
Jenny cried all that night. Sometime before dawn she fell into an exhausted sleep and woke a few hours later with just enough time to shower and drive to work.
Her red eyes and swollen face’made her look as though she’d downed a pint of vodka, but thankfully none of her fellow officers noticed or made any comments about her appearance when she walked through the station house.
When Jenny reached her desk, she was greeted with a large woven basket of freshly cut sunflowers. The sight of the bouquet was such a shock that for a moment all she could do was sink on her desk chair and stare at the bright yellow petals.
After yesterday evening, she’d never expected to hear from Lucas again. He was a smart man. She figured he would come to the conclusion that pursuing her was heading him down a dead-end street to trouble.
“Flowers for you again,” Glenda said enviously as she paused by Jenny’s workplace. “I wish I knew how you did it.”
“I hardly know myself,” Jenny murmured more to herself than to Glenda.
The little blond secretary motioned toward the flowers. “Aren’t you going to see who they’re from?”
Jenny didn’t need to open the card to know who sent the flowers. There was only one man with that much persistence. Only one man who would still be thinking of her even though she’d socked him in the face. And to know that he was still thinking of her made her heart weep.
“Oh, well, you don’t have to tell me,” Glenda went on with an airy wave of her hand. “If the guy is that crazy about you, he’s bound to show up here at the station sooner or later, and then I’ll get a look for myself.”
Captain Morgan’s secretary swished her way down the cluttered aisle between the cramped row of desks. Once the woman was out of sight, Jenny reached for the small white envelope nestled among the flowers.
The card read, Trust me. Lucas.
Three little words. Jenny didn’t know what she’d been expecting the card to say. I love you, or maybe I want to see you. Or even call me. Instead he’d simply said to trust him.
Her dry, aching eyes began to burn with tears. Quickly Jenny ducked her head and pressed her fingers hard ’ against her closed eyelids. Her crying had to stop here and now. She was a police officer. She couldn’t afford to let herself become soft and distracted. Otherwise, she might wind up getting herself or her partner killed.
Three days later, Savanna arrived at Jenny’s apartment and insisted she accompany her on a shopping trip to a nearby mall. Deciding anything would be better than sitting around trying to keep her mind off Lucas, Jenny threw on some lipstick and a coat and followed her friend out the door.
The late November day was cloudy and cold. After the two women climbed into the car, Savanna switched the heater on high, then looked over and giggled at the sight of Jenny shivering inside her red coat.
“Aren’t you glad Joe bought me this new car? Otherwise we’d be driving my Beetle with no heater.”
“Oh, no,” Jenny said between chattering teeth. “I would drive us in my car before I’d get back into that orange sardine can of yours. You drove that thing like it was a racing machine.”
Savanna pretended to be insulted until a giggle finally gave her away. “Joe said the same thing. That’s why he bought me this one. He says it’s much safer for me.”
“He wants to keep you around awhile,” Jenny reasoned.
Savanna smiled as she negotiated the car out of the parking lot. “Yes, he does. So where do you want to go? Crossroads Mall or some place closer?”
“Crossroads will be fine. I don’t have to be at work until eight this evening. Orville and I are pulling a late shift.” The car’s interior was already starting to warm up. Jenny removed her coat and tugged down the cuffs of her sweater. “Was your trip to New Orleans a good one?”
Nodding, Savanna went on to talk about the lovely time she’d had visiting her father and stepmother over the holiday.
“What did you do on Thanksgiving?” Savanna asked a few minutes later.
Jenny stared out the window at the busy interstate traffic. “I worked for part of the day. Then I had dinner with Lucas and his secretary.”
“Jenny! That’s great! Things must be heating up between you two.”
Savanna didn’t know the half of it, Jenny thought. Things had already heated up and boiled over. Other than receiving the sunflowers, she hadn’t seen or talked to Lucas since Thanksgiving. But she expected to any day now. He’d been calling her at home and at the station house, leaving messages for her to contact him. So far she’d ignored them, yet she knew he wouldn’t give up that easily. Sooner or later, she would look up and he’d be there. And the anticipation of facing him again kept her constantly on edge.
“Oh, by the way,” Savanna went on slyly. “I saw your Lucas in the paper this morning. He’s quite a hunk, Jen. He even looked good in grainy black and white. I can’t imagine how he’d be in person.”
Jenny’s gaze jerked over to her friend. “Lucas’s picture was in the paper? Is something wrong with him? Was there a story with it?”
“Calm down. There wasn’t an accident or anything like that. It was something about a charity benefit for children. The way it read, Lucas Lowrimore is one of the city’s leading contributors to children’s projects.”
“He is.”
“Hm. Sounds like a generous-hearted man. Or he needs a whale of a tax write-off.”
“Believe me, he doesn’t do it for tax reasons. Lucas is— well, he didn’t have a mother while he was growing up and he hasn’t always had money. So it’s easy for him to relate to a child’s needs.”
“You think Lucas would make a good father?”
Like a heavy cape, sadness settled around her shoulders. “Lucas would make a warm, loving father.”
Savanna made an impatient sound in her throat. “You’re singing his praises, Jenny, yet I can hear a big but in your voice.”
Jenny sighed heavily. “Savanna, I didn’t come out with you today to discuss my interest, or lack of it, in Lucas Lowrimore.”
Savanna shrugged. “That’s too bad. Because you’re going to discuss it whether you want to or not.”
Jenny rolled her eyes helplessly. No matter what spe
wed out of Savanna’s mouth, she couldn’t get mad at her. And the other woman knew it.
“The situation with me is still the same, Savanna,” Jenny said with exaggerated patience. “I don’t think marrying Lucas, or any man for that matter, would be the right thing for me to do.”
Groaning with disbelief, Savanna shook her head. “Jenny, I hardly think a man with that sort of love and compassion for children would start knocking you around after you were married.”
Jenny stared at her lap. Images of Lucas and his farmhouse floated into her mind. He would do more than make the rooms beautiful with carpentry work, he would eventually turn the place into a real home. Someday he would find that woman he’d been searching for and they would make love in the very room where Jenny had stood close beside him, touched him and listened as he told her about his mother.
Knowing she couldn’t be that woman was a constant torture to her, and she was beginning to wonder how much longer it was going to be before she finally cracked into emotional pieces.
“No. I don’t think Lucas could ever be abusive, either,” she said after a moment. “But let’s face it, Savanna, I’m not wife material. After the glow of the honeymoon wore off, I think Lucas would be disenchanted with me. Especially with me working the streets every day as a law enforcer.”
Savanna cast a keen glance at Jenny. “Have you ever thought about giving up your job?”
Jenny leaned her head back against the car seat and closed her eyes. “My job is my life. It’s all I am and all I know. Why would I want to give it all up for Lucas?”
Savanna smiled and tapped a rhythmic beat on the steering wheel. “Because he’s probably worth it. And because you’ve had ten years of law work. Maybe it’s time you chose a different life for yourself.”
“That’s easy for you to say. Your life is all settled. You have a good husband, an adorable stepdaughter and a child on the way. You’re looking at the world through happy eyes.”
“Don’t you think it’s time you looked at the world through happy eyes, too?” Savanna countered.
Wanted: Wife Page 13