ELEMENTS: Acquiesce

by Kathryn Andrews

  Breck mounted his horse.

  “Where are you going?” asked Cordelia.

  “I can’t listen to this right now,” said Breck, “I need time to think.”

  Breck jabbed his heel into Misty’s side and galloped towards the town. Cordelia stared at Flynn in disbelief.

  “Don’t look at me like that,” said Flynn.

  “Were you ever going to tell me you had a son? How could you abandon him like that? Your own flesh and blood.”

  “I’ve told you, it was the right thing to do at the time.”

  “But you raised me and I’m not even yours.”

  “You are mine, don’t ever say differently.”

  “Not really. Not like Breck. I feel terrible knowing that you raised me for all those years when your own son was here, without you.”

  “He was fine. He had parents who loved him.”

  “But you never came back for him.”

  “How could I? He was theirs. He didn’t know me.”

  “You didn’t give him a chance to know you.”

  “It’s not that simple Cordelia. There hasn’t been a day that I haven’t thought about that boy, but he was settled. Me showing up would have upset everything.”

  “So why take me in? Weren’t you worried you might hurt me too?”

  “No. Everything was calm out there on the boat. It hadn’t happened for at least two years when I found you. Finding you was a gift, Cordelia. A chance to do the right thing.”

  “Did you know his aunt and uncle ran the tavern?”

  “There wasn’t a tavern back then and I never mixed much after, you know. I didn’t hear much about anything in town.”

  “That explains it,” said Cordelia.

  “What?”

  “Why they’ve been so awful to him. He’s not really one of them, is he? His aunt and uncle must have known he was someone else’s child.”

  “Have they treated him badly?”

  “He’s had a tough time since his parents died. Sorry, you know what I mean. Mr Kelly was particularly awful to him.”

  Flynn shook his head. “It sounds like Mr Kelly got what he deserved. Perhaps that’s why I served time on the island, as punishment for my sins. I never meant for Breck to be unhappy.”

  “He needs you,” said Cordelia. “He needs his father. Make it right.”

  Cordelia turned and walked back to the lighthouse, leaving Flynn standing alone by the peat bog. Hands in her pockets and her head bowed, Cordelia watched her tears fall to the ground and nestle on the grass like the morning dew.

  At the lighthouse, Cordelia met Mazu in the tunnel.

  “What’s wrong?” asked Mazu. “Where’s Flynn?”

  “He’s out walking,” said Cordelia, “he needed some air.”

  “You’ve been crying,” said Mazu.

  Cordelia wiped a tear from her eye, “It’s just the wind,” she said and continued along the tunnel to her chamber.

  Mazu sensed there was something amiss but decided to leave Cordelia alone for now.

  In the privacy of her chamber, Cordelia curled up on her bed and cried into her pillow. Confused, she wondered what her place was in all this. Even Flynn, the person she felt closest to seemed like a stranger now.

  “You’re not feeling sorry for yourself again are you?” said Nixie, floating into the chamber. “I thought we were making progress with all this drama.”

  “I should have known there was no privacy around here,” retorted Cordelia.

  “He’s still your father, Cordelia.”

  “Then why does it feel like I’m losing him again? Breck must think I’m an idiot. All this time I’ve been telling him about this amazing man I lost and he’s not even my father, he’s Breck’s. He’ll resent me, knowing I had him to myself all those years. I kept him away from his own son.”

  “That’s nonsense and you know it. Flynn told you why he did it and you’ve always known he wasn’t your real father. Flynn had a life before you came along.”

  “He lied to me.”

  “No, he didn’t. He just didn’t reveal everything about his life. He’s not the only one with secrets though, is he?”

  “That’s completely different.”

  “How?”

  “He knew he had a son and didn’t tell me.”

  “And you know about Meren, but you haven’t told him, have you?”

  Cordelia had no response.

  “As for Breck, he loves you,” said Nixie. “It’s not you he’s upset with.”

  “Since you seem to know everything, what am I supposed to do?” asked Cordelia.

  “Build the relationship between Breck and Flynn, they’re better together than apart.”

  “And where do I fit in to this?”

  “They’ll both love you just the same, but you have greater things in store. Remember who you are, Cordelia.”

  “That’s the problem, I don’t know who I am.”

  “You’re on a journey Cordelia, and you’ll meet different people along the way. Every one of those people serves a purpose, no matter how long or short their time is with you. Not everyone is supposed to be in our lives forever.”

  “What are you saying? Flynn and Breck aren’t supposed to be part of my life anymore?”

  “No, no. Oh gosh, these things never come out how I plan them in my head.”

  Cordelia wondered if Nixie ever planned what she was going to say, after all, she did have a habit of blurting things out.

  “Of course, they’re very important and they will still be there but you are destined for greater things.”

  “People keep telling me that.”

  “Because it’s true. You have another world waiting for you.”

  “I just don’t know where I belong.”

  “That’s because you’re between two worlds, you haven’t chosen one or the other.”

  “So help me. What should I do? It would be easier if I had a crystal ball.”

  “Your quest is to get to Meren, that’s where you belong.”

  “That would mean leaving Flynn and Breck, I can’t do it.”

  Cordelia waited for another wise response from Nixie but she had gone. The mermaid sat for a few moments longer before going to find Flynn.

  Cordelia found Flynn outside the lighthouse with the horses.

  “I’m sorry for walking away like that,” she said.

  “It’s alright, I understand. I’m sorry I wasn’t honest with you.”

  “I still love you,” said Cordelia, squeezing him tight.

  Flynn stroked Cordelia’s hair. “I don’t ever want to lose you. You’re my only daughter.”

  “But no longer your only child.”

  “Now I’ve a daughter and a son,” smiled Flynn. “Did you ever think you’d have a big brother?”

  Cordelia’s heart sank. She felt nauseous. “He’s not my brother though, is he? Not really.”

  “I’ve always considered you my own Cordelia, that makes you brother and sister in my eyes. I won’t have it any other way.”

  Cordelia faked a half smile.

  “You say Breck is a friend of yours?”

  Cordelia nodded.

  “Well then you’ll be able to help me put things right with him.”

  “Of course,” said Cordelia and kissed Flynn on the cheek.

  The moment was interrupted by Max’s desire to throw his weight around. “What d’you think you’re doing messing with the horses?”

  Cordelia glared at Max through narrowed eyes.

  “We’re not messing with the horses at all,” said Flynn, “we’re just back from a walk, beautiful day for it.”

  “Is that right?” asked Max. “Where did you go?”

  Cordelia sensed Max was pushing for an argument and gently tugged at Flynn’s elbow. “Come on, let’s go inside.”

  “So you’ve something to hide?” said Max.

  “That’s enough,” said Rafe. “They mean no harm.”

  “Oh come on,” said M
ax. “I’m only saying what everyone else is thinking. Why is he still here? He’s not one of us. He’s probably been into town telling everyone about us, and if he hasn’t, it’s only a matter of time.”

  “He hasn’t said anything to anyone,” protested Cordelia, “he wouldn’t.”

  “How can you be so sure?” asked Max. “Tell me, why do Triton and Mazu bend all the rules for you? What’s so special about you?”

  “They don’t. I follow the rules just as everyone else.”

  “I’m not blind Cordelia. You miss lessons, you wander off whenever you feel like it, you never even met the requirements to be here in the first place, but somehow you’re still here, with him.”

  “I won’t have you speak to my daughter in that manner,” said Flynn.

  Max squared up to Flynn.

  “That’s enough Max,” said Rafe, putting his hand on Max’s shoulder.

  “There’s something off about you,” said Max, pointing at Cordelia and shoulder barging Flynn as he walked to the horse shed.

  “I’m sorry,” said Rafe. “He’s a bit of a loose cannon.”

  “I thought we’d reached an understanding,” said Cordelia.

  “He sees you as a threat.”

  “How?”

  “He knows how hard you’ve been practising for the diving competition. He won’t be beaten by a girl, especially not you.”

  “In that case, may the best woman win,” said Cordelia.

  At the tavern Breck stood in the doorway watching the babes crawl around the floor while his aunt cried into a glass of whisky.

  He took a deep breath, exhaled and marched over to the bar. “Will you pull yourself together,” he said, taking the whisky glass from his aunt. “We can’t afford for you to be drinking this stuff. It’s no wonder the place is empty; it’s supposed to be everyone else drowning their sorrows in here, not us.”

  “I’ve nothing better to do,” she said.

  “You’ve two babes who need you,” said Breck, “you’re no good to them in this state.”

  “Then they’re lucky they have you.”

  “How d’you expect me to do all this on my own? Work the peat bog, run the tavern, look after these two, it’s impossible.”

  “You know where the door is.”

  “Be careful what you wish for,” warned Breck.

  “You’d never leave.”

  “Tell me about my parents,” said Breck.

  Mrs Kelly dragged her eyes away from the whisky glass and studied Breck. “What’s to tell?”

  “What d’you know?”

  “They were good, hard working people, you know that. They loved you just the same as the others.”

  “That’s an odd thing to say.”

  “What is?”

  “They loved me just the same as the others?”

  “It’s just a figure of speech isn’t it?”

  “They weren’t my real parents, were they?”

  “Who’ve you been talking to?”

  “You didn’t deny it.”

  “I’m confused,” said Mrs Kelly. “I don’t know what’s real and what’s not anymore. I’m going to lie down.”

  Just like that, Breck was left on his own with the babes again. Forlorn, he displayed the closed sign in the window and locked the door.

  Every day after that, Cordelia walked to the peat bog twice a day and waited by the stone wall for Breck but he did not come. Gazing upon the shimmering ocean, her heart ached with sadness and a longing that was too much to endure, but the ocean had a way of healing her soul and had it not been there, she may surely have died from a broken heart.

  After a week had passed, Cordelia decided to take matters into her own hands.

  “Men can be so stubborn,” said Cordelia during Sunday breakfast with Flynn. “There’s only one thing for it.”

  Flynn raised an inquisitive eyebrow.

  “If he won’t come to the peat bog, then I shall go to him.”

  “The tavern’s no place for young ladies,” said Flynn, “let me go.”

  “He doesn’t know you, it’s best if I speak with him. He might listen to me.”

  “Thank you, Cordelia,” said Flynn, placing his hand on hers across the table. “You’re a good girl.”

  Cordelia smiled and dabbed her lips with a handkerchief. “If you’ll excuse me,” she said and pressed her hands on the table as she rose from her seat. “No time like the present.”

  She took Flynn’s flat cap and one of the horses and rode into town. Although she’d pinned her hair beneath the cap in an effort to not draw attention to herself, the locals still stared at the stranger riding bareback into town on a beautiful white horse.

  At the tavern, Cordelia tied the horse next to Misty and knocked the back door. There was no answer. Cordelia tried the handle but it was locked. Peering through the window she could see the kitchen was disordered. There was no sign of anyone. Cordelia walked around to the front of the tavern where the doors were also locked. She hammered on the door with her fist.

  “Bit early for drinking isn’t it?” said a passerby.

  “Go to church and pray for your sins,” said another.

  Cordelia continued to knock the door.

  “You won’t get an answer yet. They don’t open ‘til eleven.”

  Cordelia instantly recognized the voice. “Jerry!” she cried. “It’s so good to see you!”

  Jerry hadn’t recognized Cordelia. In his constant stupor he would have easily mistaken her for a boy. He concentrated hard as he studied her.

  “It’s me, Cordelia.”

  “Well I’ll be damned.”

  Cordelia thought better of asking Jerry how he’d been keeping. The smell of ale, his bleary eyes and confusion told her enough.

  “I’m trying to find Breck,” she said.

  “Well, you’ve come to the right place, but they won’t be opening yet. That’s if they open at all.”

  “What d’you mean?”

  “They’ve been closed all week. Talk of the town.”

  “If the tavern’s been closed, where’ve you been getting yours from?”

  Jerry winked. “I have my own secret supply.” He pulled out a hip flask from his jacket and offered it to Cordelia.

  Cordelia scrunched her nose. “No thank you.”

  Jerry raised the flask to his lips and guzzled the ale like it was plain water. He walked on, swaying and tripping over his own feet. Cordelia hammered on the door again but still there was no answer. She moved across to the window to peer inside and that’s when she saw the eviction notice.

  “Breck!” she called and hammered on the window pane. “I won’t stop until you open this door!”

  A horse and cart pulled up outside, then the bolt on the door clunked and the door opened to reveal Mrs Kelly. She was thin, unkempt and her face was gaunt. She passed a single bag to the driver and he loaded it, with her babes onto the cart. Without saying a word or closing the door she left. Cordelia stepped into the tavern, the light was dim and the dust irritated her nose.

  “Breck, are you here? It’s me.”

  Slow, heavy footsteps trudged down the stairs and a tall figure stood in the shadows of the hallway.

  “You shouldn’t be here,” said Breck.

  “I needed to see you.”

  “Did he send you?”

  “No, I’m worried about you. Will you come out here where I can see you?”

  Breck stayed in the shadows.

  “I saw your aunt leaving.”

  “She’s off to start a new life in America. That’s if she gets there. There’s a reason they call ‘em coffin ships.”

  “I’m sorry.”

  “Don’t be. She knows her own mind.”

  “I’m sorry for you,” said Cordelia, edging her way behind the bar towards Breck. “You don’t have to be alone.”

  Breck shied away as Cordelia moved closer.

  “Why won’t you look at me?” asked Cordelia. “Look at me.”


  Breck slowly turned his face to the crack of light seeping through the window to reveal a multitude of hues around his eyes and cheekbones.

  Cordelia gasped. “Who did this to you?”

  “No one important.”

  “You need to report this to the gardai,” said Cordelia.

  “There’s no point. She’s gone.”

  “Your aunt did this to you? What did she use, a rock?”

  “A saucepan actually.” Breck smiled and removed Cordelia’s cap. Her soft, grey hair tumbled around her shoulders. “I’m glad you’re here.”

  “Let’s get out of here,” said Cordelia.

  “Looking like this?”

  “They’re just war wounds and you’ve lived to tell the tale. Who cares what anyone else thinks. You’ve nothing to hide.”

  They locked the tavern and left through the back door. Seagulls squawked in the clear blue sky and the warm April sun gently kissed Breck’s bruises as he stepped into the daylight.

  “I see you’ve brought a friend with you,” said Breck.

  “Breck, this is Réalta, Réalta, this is Breck.”

  “Pleased to meet you,” said Breck, patting Réalta’s nose. “So where are we heading?”

  “The Bridges of Ross.”

  “Is that wise after last time?”

  “We can’t stay away forever, it’s too beautiful.

  Breck and Cordelia raced out of town on their horses, laughing wildly as adrenalin pumped through their veins.

  At the Bridges of Ross they tied the horses to a post at the top of the slip way and hurried down to the sparkling rocks. The sight made Cordelia’s heart sing. The rocks looked resplendent in the sunlight.

  “Will you come in?” asked Cordelia, pulling off her boots.

  Breck dithered.

  “Come on, salt water heals all wounds,” said Cordelia, stripping naked and leaping into the sea.

  Wide eyed, Breck pulled off his clothes and leapt in after her. “You’re wild!” he called.