My Redemption Too: a Second Chance series

by S. K. Lessly

  Paul leaned closer to me and rested his forehead against mine. “I was a fool,” he admitted. He ran his hand down my back around to my leg and hefted it to his hip. He pulled me closer to him, trying to avoid disturbing the wires connected to me. “I should have known you would’ve been there if you could. I should have let you talk instead of running off at the mouth.” He leaned back from me and tilted my head up to look at him. “The sheer happiness and love I saw in your eyes when you walked inside of my room should have been my proof. I was blinded by my stupidity. I’m so sorry, baby. Please forgive me.”

  I closed my eyes and sighed deeply. I wasn’t sure I could forgive him, not this soon anyway. He said some hurtful things, and the disgusted way he looked at me was still fresh in my mind, not to mention he believed that bitch over me. I should make him pay for hurting me. I should cuss his ass out and send him packing. I was just about to do that very thing when I felt his lips against mine.

  I bit back a moan as he kissed my lips, my cheeks, my chin, my forehead, my eyes all the while saying he was sorry, that he was an idiot, and to please forgive him.

  I groaned in frustration and rested my hand on his shoulder to push him back, but he didn’t move an inch. “You’re not playing fair,” I whispered.

  “I can't play fair. I’ve missed you so fucking much.” Paul sat up and hovered over me. “You mean the world to me. There's no me without you. And now you’re pregnant with my baby. Fuck, baby. I love you so fucking much.”

  I was full out crying now. I had bypassed the choked-up feeling, the burn of tears in my eyes and nose. Nope, I busted out crying and buried my face in his chest.

  “You… destroyed me…” I managed to say in between breaths.

  Paul rubbed my back, my hair, and squeezed me as close to him as he could. “I know. God, I’m so sorry. Never again, never.”

  A loud beeping sound started blaring throughout the room causing us to break apart. A nurse walked inside the room and started fussing at Paul. Grinning at me, he peeled himself off me and awkwardly stood up. Nurse Maddie walked in too and gave Paul a look that could peel the skin off a snake.

  Paul just shrugged and beamed at her.

  My nurse fixed the wires and leads attached to my chest and stomach. She chastised both of us about the importance of not disturbing my wires. My nurse, I couldn’t remember her name warned Paul to behave. Paul gave her his scout’s honor, with a two-finger salute and one of his panty-dropping smiles.

  Nurse Maddie wasn’t buying it. She shook her head and looked at me.

  “You have your hands full with this one.”

  I gave her a wry smile. “I know.”

  Paul's smile grew, and he sat down in the chair next to my bed.

  “You have five more minutes, and it’s back to bed you go.” Nurse Maddie warned Paul. “You have physical therapy in the morning.”

  Paul groaned and nodded. “Yes, ma'am. Let me just say goodbye.”

  When we were alone, Paul reached for my hand and threaded his fingers through mine. He brought my hand to his lips and kissed me.

  “Am I forgiven?” he asked.

  I gave him a side eye. “Uh no, I’m still mad at you.”

  He grinned. “No problem. I’ll just have to make it up to you.”

  We talked a bit more, with him asking about Mark’s visit. My eyebrows rose with that news.

  “How did you know Mark came to see me?”

  Paul shrugged one shoulder and looked apologetically at me.

  “Sabrina said you were crying on some guy. I knew there weren't too many guys you would cry in front of but Mark or maybe Brian. I doubt it was Brian. Not to say he wouldn’t have come to see you, but there would have been bloodshed with my parents as his victims if he came up here.”

  I laughed and had to admit he had a point. I filled him in on everything he missed starting from the day Samson came to see me to last night. Mrs. Maddie came in to get him right when I told him how I got my bruise.

  The rage that filled Paul's face had me concerned he'd bust a blood vessel on the side of his head. He was pissed when he left but managed to capture my lips in a heart-melting kiss before he was wheeled out of my room.

  “I’ll see you tomorrow,” he called over his shoulder.

  “Okay,” I called back.

  “I love you, Lauren.” Paul had stopped at the door to my room and looked back at me.

  I gave him a side smile and shook my head. “Uh-huh, I’m still mad at you.”

  He grinned at me and sent me a wink before he was gone.

  * * *

  The next day, close to noon, Paul was wheeled into my room at the same time my doctor came in to see me.

  “Well, it seems you have company,” my doctor observed, smiling.

  The man looked to be in his fifties, with short black hair, graying on his temples, and kind, blue eyes. He was thinly built and not much taller than Paul was. He was very nice and reminded me of my father when he chastised me. You could imagine how uncomfortable it was when he examined me, very uncomfortable.

  Paul rose from the wheelchair, walked up to the doctor, and introduced himself.

  “Nice to meet you, Paul. I’m Dr. Walsh,” my doctor introduced himself then shook Paul's hand.

  “It’s nice to meet you as well, sir. So, tell me, how are they doing?”

  Paul took the empty lounge chair on the other side of my bed. He took my hand and looked up expectantly at Dr. Walsh.

  Dr. Walsh gave me one of those fatherly looks and sighed heavily. I fought back an eye roll.

  “Well, the baby is fine. I don’t see anything to be alarmed about. The baby's heartbeat is steady and strong. We took some routine tests, and we’re waiting for the results, but I’m confident things are progressing well. Who we are concerned with right now is the mother here. Her pressure is better now, but her stress levels are still high. Her blood count is still low as well, which is an indication that someone isn’t taking her vitamins.”

  I scoffed and rolled my eyes this time with my lips turned down. “Unfortunately. I can’t keep anything down, and I can’t take those vitamins on an empty stomach. They make me sick.”

  “Lauren, I understand what you’re going through. Many of my patients complain of the same things. However, it’s important for the baby that you take your vitamins. You can try to eat toast or broth to coat your stomach enough to take the vitamins. Your body is going through a serious change, and the baby needs your body to be as strong as it can. That means you need to eat, rest, and take your vitamins.”

  I grunted my reply. Easy for him to say. He’s not throwing up his stomach lining every time he eats.

  Paul gave me a chastising glare before his eyes fell back on the doctor.

  “Sir, you can be sure that I’ll make sure she eats, takes her vitamins, and gets some rest. When will she be released?”

  “Well, we’ll monitor her for the rest of the day. If her pressure stays normal and the tests come back normal, then she can go home either later today or tomorrow morning.”

  “Perfect.” Paul grinned.

  I looked over at him. “When are you being released?” I asked him, and the doctor’s eyebrows rose with questions but didn’t ask one.

  Paul dismissed me with a wave. “Sooner than you think, so don’t worry about it.” he then looked at the doctor. “Thank you, doctor. Is there anything else I need to keep an eye on?”

  The doctor and Paul went back and forth with the doctor telling Paul everything I had heard before. The ultrasound was scheduled next week. I needed to monitor my blood pressure and take it easy, watch what I eat and so on.

  When the doctor left, Paul beamed at me. His happiness was so infectious that I couldn’t help but smile back.

  “Have you told your family about the baby?” he asked.

  I shook my head. “No, not yet. I found out only a few days ago. I hadn’t had a chance to talk to them. I hadn’t had a chance to even call them to tell them you’re awa
ke.”

  “Do you think Mark told them?”

  I shrugged. “I doubt it. He would wait for me to tell them.”

  Paul stood and reached for my phone on the table next to me. “Good. But let’s at least call them and tell them I’m okay. We can plan to make a trip down to see them in a few weeks to tell them about the baby face-to-face.”

  “Have you told your family?” I asked as he fiddled with my phone.

  Paul replied without lifting his head to look at me. “No.”

  My brows furrowed. “What do you mean, no? You haven’t seen them yet? I’m sure they’ll be stopping by today to—"

  Paul, seemingly finding the number he wanted, hit send, and placed the phone on speaker, and essentially cut off any more discussions on that topic. He did say, right before the call picked up, “We’ll talk about that later.”

  Before I could rebuttal or say something, my dad’s voice boomed through the speakers on the phone.

  We spent the next hour or so talking to my parents and siblings, my brothers and sisters happened to be at our parents’ house when we called. Paul told them what happened to him and about his injuries and road to recovery. We then talked about making a trip down there for a weekend when Paul was feeling better.

  The second we hung up, I drilled him about what was going on with his family, especially when my father asked if his family was excited about him being awake. Paul gave them a vague answer, which my family accepted, but I didn’t. I saw the anger and hurt in his eyes.

  Reluctantly, Paul told me all about his run-in with his parents as well as the conversation he had with Sabrina. I didn’t feel bad about Sabrina and hell, and I didn’t feel bad about his father either. But his mom, for some reason, I felt guilty that she was placed in the crossfire. She shouldn’t have to suffer because of his father.

  There was no talking to Paul about it now. He was so far beyond being pissed it wasn’t funny. I made a mental note to talk to him another time. Maybe once he calmed down, we could talk. If I have to use my feminine ways to get him to see things my way I would. I just hoped I was done puking when the time came to seduce him. I would hate to lose my cookies all over him while I was giving him a blowjob. Nope, not sexy at all.

  But… I was still mad at him. So maybe a blow job and blowing my cookies all over him would be just what he deserved.

  Hmmm…

  30

  Lauren

  Paul became a determined beast over the next few weeks. He worked out when he didn’t go to physical therapy and went to therapy when he didn't work out. His goal was to pass his physical endurance tests as soon as possible in order to return to work, and he was dead set on making that happen. Much to my surprise, he also found time and energy to finish up the bathroom and my closet. He was my superhero, which was why I forgave him a few days after we both were released from the hospital. He also did a lot of groveling on his knees, using persuasion skills and vibrating objects that let’s just say were very persuasive, I mean very persuasive.

  The doctor hadn’t cleared him to have sex yet. He didn’t want him to push himself too much, which I knew drove him insane. However, he used other ways to show me exactly how sorry he was for hurting me.

  So yes, to answer that question in your head, I decided to give him another chance. Who could blame me?

  Needless to say, Paul had been making strides with his recovery. He had lost a lot of weight when he was in a coma, but after a few weeks, that weight was back including an increase in muscle mass. I wasn’t complaining about the additional muscles. The man had been sexy before, but now, holy cow the man was even more delectable. Some were shocked at how quickly he recovered from his injuries, but I wasn’t. When Paul wanted something, there wasn’t anything or anyone that could stop him.

  My family came into town one weekend, and we had a huge cookout. Paul was on the grill, as usual, and my mom was making sides. I was banned from cooking, but I ignored Paul and helped my mom anyway. My nieces and nephews were swimming in the pool and my brothers, father, Brice, who by the way came to see my sister, and Paul was hanging around the grill talking about none other than sports.

  I had watched the sly glances Brice was throwing my sister when he thought no one was looking. I had asked her if she and Brice were seeing each other, and she simply smiled slyly at me.

  “Well let’s just say, he's been to Philly a few times and we’ve spoken on the phone, but that’s about it,” she stated matter-of-factly. “I’m taking things slowly. We’re just getting to know each other, that’s all.” I nodded my understanding. She had just finalized her divorce, so no way was she jumping into something so soon. She was smarter than I was. Then suddenly she pulled me in close and whispered, “But damn, I’m having a hell of a time just getting to know him.” She smiled at me suggestively, and I laughed.

  Nasty ass.

  About an hour later, our bell rang. I started for the door, but it opened and in walked the rest of my family— Tonya, Tyler, Samson, and Melissa. This simple barbeque quickly turned into a sort of welcome home party as well as a baby celebration once we announced to everyone that I was pregnant. We had such a good time together, playing pool, listening to music, and playing silly board games. The only thing missing tonight was the presence of Paul’s family.

  When I asked him, later that night, if he'd spoken to his family, he immediately changed the subject. I shouldn’t have been surprised. He’d done that every time I asked him about them. He’d either change the subject or flat out tell me he didn’t want to talk about it, and then he'd change the subject. I knew not talking to his family bothered him, but he refused to address it or talk to me about it. I wasn’t sure what to do.

  The night of the party, I decided to go to the one person that might give me some insight on the psyche of my boyfriend, my mom. I had explained what happened between Paul and his parents when my mom and I were cleaning up the kitchen. Her advice was to let Paul be.

  “Sweetheart, he will talk to them when he's ready. As much as you want to push, you have to let go. Nothing good is going to come of badgering him about it.”

  I sighed and listened to her. It was painful to see him hurting, but I let him be… for now.

  * * *

  It was the middle of September, a mild day for the month, and I was coming home late from work. I pulled up next to Paul’s truck, peeled out of my car, and made my way inside. I meandered toward the garage entrance instead of the front door. Paul had finished upgrading the master suite oasis and it was amazing. I had the huge walk in closet I always wanted with plenty of space for my shoes and clothes. He installed a huge shower that fit two, duel skins, and a beautiful garden spa tub. It was now on to the kitchen.

  I had decided to go with cherry wood cabinets for the kitchen. Paul took down the old ones and bought new unstained cabinets. I was banned from staining them, something about fumes and being pregnant, whatever. Nevertheless, I had to say, the finished product looked amazing. I couldn’t wait to see everything when he's done.

  Paul also installed countertops that was made out of recycled-glass, which brought everything home. The countertops had a mix of black, white, and earth tones in the makeup of the counter. I wouldn’t have thought of going that route, picking recycled glass instead of granite, but Paul told me it would look great, and it wouldn’t cost as much as granite. I had to agree with him once he was done. It was a great addition to the improvements of our house.

  I was proud to say “our house." I added Paul to the mortgage, making this house not only mine but his as well, legally anyway. This place had become our home the day he said he'd move in with me.

  So, I was looking for my man, thinking he would be in the garage inspecting his handy work with the cabinets. But once I stepped inside, he wasn’t there. He wasn’t in the kitchen either.

  Deciding that I would check his favorite place, the basement, I made my way across the living room to the basement steps. I took the steps slowly, holding on to the
railing as I went, and found him sitting in one of our indoor patio chairs in front of the sliding glass door. He looked deep in thought as he stared out at the pool.

  We had recently hired a landscaper to install a waterfall feature as well as shrubs and small trees to add to our luscious backyard. It was beautiful out there, and I found myself sitting out and enjoying the sound of the waterfall myself when I had the time.

  “Hey, sweetheart, is everything okay?” I walked up to him shedding my heels as I walked.

  He turned to watch me come up to him and smiled.

  “Hey, when did you get in?”

  “Just now, is everything okay?” I repeated my question and ran my hands through his hair.

  He nodded. “Yeah, baby, everything’s fine. How are you feeling? Did you eat?” He pulled me close to him, wrapped an arm around me, and kissed my belly.

  I had a cute little belly that seemed to have arrived overnight. Paul loved to caress and kiss my belly, telling me that it calmed him to know I had his baby growing inside me.

  Knowing that he was evading my question, I did the same and continued to push him. “Paul, you don’t seem fine. What’s wrong?”

  Paul didn’t respond. He held me by my hips and rested his head on my belly. I kept running my fingers through his hair, massaging his scalp, soothing him as best I could. He was scaring me. He’d been moody and withdrawn off and on for weeks. I had no idea how to get him out of his head. I knew my mom told me to let him be, but I couldn’t any longer. This has gone on long enough.

  I decided to change tactics and prodded lightly, “Are you missing your family?”

  That seemed to snap him out of where ever he’d gone to. He let me go and settled back in his chair.