Mine Would Be You: A Bad Boy Rancher Love Story (The Dawson Brothers Book 3)
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Not that I needed to see her every second of the day, but I was getting used to having her presence around me most of the time. We had been working so closely together over the past month that it felt strange to not know exactly what she was up to at any given moment.
It wasn’t exactly a mystery what she was doing at the moment, however. She had been amazing in the way she coordinated the festival, bringing together all the little details. The refreshment stand never ran out of anything. The pumpkin patch was always pruned back as pumpkins were picked. Those details just made everything look professional and authentic, as though we’d already done this for years, rather than thrown the whole thing together in the month leading up to the event. I couldn’t have been more proud of her.
What’s more, I could tell she was having fun with it. Sometimes I’d look over and see the biggest smile on her face. Or I’d watch her laughing with one of the kids while she manned the face-painting booth. It made my heart swell just looking at her.
I was falling more and more in love with her as the days went on.
“I think next up for us is the haunted hayride,” David said, glancing at his watch. “You’ve got to tell me, though, is it even scary at this time of day? Or should we wait until after dark?”
“Oh, it’ll be scary,” I promised. “They’re already calling it Oklahoma’s most thrilling attraction of the season. We hired this makeup artist who really wants to go to Hollywood one day and she’s been using this as her portfolio, sending all the scariest pictures to her connections in the industry.” I made a face. “We did have to tell her to tone it down, especially with the blood, though. Too many of the little kids were getting a little too frightened. And their parents too, to be honest.”
David laughed. “All right, then,” he said. He held out a hand to Sarah. “Shall we?”
“You’d better hold my hand the whole time,” Sarah made him promise. “And I swear, if you laugh at me for screaming, there’ll be no sex for a month!”
I chuckled. “I’ll see if I can track Abi down and introduce you guys in a little while,” I told them.
“Good,” Sarah said. She gave me a hug. “We’re really proud of you.”
“Thanks,” I said. “And thanks for your support, both of you.” Ted had eventually come around, and he’d even visited the festival the other night. But it was nice to have David on my side right from the start. I was starting to feel like everything would work out.
“Do you want to come on the haunted hayride with us?” David asked. “It’s good to see you. It’s been a while.”
“I’ve got to make sure everything’s going okay at all the different stations, but we’ll catch up before you leave,” I said.
“If not, I’m back at Thanksgiving. And Christmas,” David said. He winked at me. “But I didn’t tell you that. I want it to be a surprise for Mama.”
“She’ll love that,” I said, already picturing her face when she opened the door to find him there. He came back regularly, but I knew that Mama still missed having all of us in the same house. Heck, she even missed me and got excited whenever I came over for dinner, and I was just up the road!
I whistled a little tune as David and Sarah headed for the hayride. I thought I saw Abi for a second, but then she vanished again. We had a pretty big crowd there that evening, and it might make finding her a little tricky. But I’d manage it, I was sure. If nothing else, I knew what her tasks were for the very end of the night and I’d meet her over by the face-painting booth when it was time for her to do the nightly count of our earnings.
“Hey boss?” Brian, one of our zombies, asked, appearing at my elbow.
“What’s up, Brian?” I responded. “What are you doing out of the haunt? You’re going to scare all the kids.”
“Sorry,” he apologized. “You got any bandages in the house or barn or anywhere? One of the kids tripped getting out of the wagon and skinned his knees. The medical station seems to be out.”
“No problem, I’m on it,” I told him, clapping him on the shoulder. I spared one last look towards the crowd, hoping to at least see Abi, and make eye contact and smile at her. Don’t get me wrong, I was happy that we were busy, but I wished I could have a minute to take a little breather and say hello to her. It seemed like over the past couple weeks, the only time we really got to appreciate one another was in the moments we stole in the evenings. Usually we were both so exhausted by that point that it was all we could do to make out a little before going to bed, occasionally together but more often separate.
But I didn’t see her anywhere, and I knew I needed to move quickly before the kid’s parents got upset with the lack of first aid supplies. I ran up towards the house, figuring I’d see Abi as soon as I was done with this task. Hopefully there wouldn’t be another crisis to deal with by then.
Chapter 32
Abi
I managed to avoid Mason for most of the night. Hiding from him may not have been the most mature move, but it was the only way I was going to get through the evening without making a scene. Anyway, we were busy. There were so many other things I needed to do that I could, thankfully, go whole minutes without thinking about him.
Without thinking about the fact that he had been cheating on me.
But it doesn’t really count as cheating if we never agreed to be in a relationship, I reminded myself. We hadn’t really pinned down where we stood. It seemed like every time a relationship was involved, something happened to ruin things. I couldn’t remember if this last time we had agreed to be in a relationship or if we had just started acting like we were. I knew that I had mentioned returning to North Carolina, so maybe Mason didn’t view this as cheating on me. Maybe he’d just considered us friends with benefits the whole time.
I sighed and shook my head. Either way, we were going to have to talk about things now. I couldn’t deny how hurt I felt, and was already wondering if I should leave early, before the festival was even over. Could I continue to work alongside this man who had broken my heart?
Because that’s what this was, I was sure. Every time I thought about him coming down the stairs with that woman, I felt my chest constrict and it got hard to breathe. I forced myself not to cry, not now, not in front of everyone. But I could feel the tears lurking there, just behind my eyes, and I knew I was going to have to let them out sooner or later. Hopefully in the privacy of my room, with a big tub of ice cream in my lap.
The worst part was, I didn’t exactly have any close friends here in Oklahoma I could talk to about this. The best I’d be able to do was call up Cami back home and tell her all about it. But she didn’t even know Mason, so the best she’d be able to say was that he didn’t deserve me and that I could do better.
But I wasn’t so sure I could do better. Not that I thought I deserved to be with a player, someone who cheated on girls like it was nothing, but that was the part I just didn’t understand. Mason seemed like such a good guy. It didn’t seem like him to cheat on me.
Which is why I was even more certain that it was my own fault he had slept with that other woman. I must not have made it clear that I thought we were in a relationship. I must have been too wishy-washy, too scared, and too uncertain about the whole thing. He’d found what he wanted with someone else.
Finally, after what felt like an interminable amount of time, things began to slow down around the farm. The last hayride ended, the crowd started to thin out as people started heading for their cars.
That was my cue to go through each of the stands and start tallying up our profits for the night, starting with the face-painting booth and ending with the refreshment stand, which would stay open until the very last of the people trickled out, in case anyone needed water or anything else to go.
Unfortunately, I knew that Mason knew my routine very well and that he would undoubtedly come looking for me as soon as I got started with it. It wasn’t like us to not chat at all over the course of the night, so he had to know that something was up.
But that was none of my business. Whatever we’d had was over now. It was over the second he took that woman upstairs.
Squaring my shoulders, I walked towards the face-painting booth, knowing that I couldn’t put it off any longer. Besides, I was going to have to face Mason sooner or later. I might as well do it now and get it over with.
As I headed that way, I saw Mason was already there waiting for me. What’s more, that same brunette from before was right there with him. I scowled. What, did he think introductions were appropriate? If he suggested a threesome, I was going to slap him in the face.
“You asshole,” I said to Mason, folding my arms across my chest as soon as I reached them. “First you have the gall to sleep with some other woman and flaunt it, and then, what, you want to introduce us?”
Mason looked surprised. “What?” he asked.
“Oh come on, don’t try to deny it. I saw the two of you come downstairs together. But I guess it’s all okay because you know her from before, don’t you?” I sneered at him and then turned to the woman. “I don’t know what he’s promised you, if you think the two of you are in a relationship, but Mason Dawson is a player. An absolute player.”
The woman looked shocked as well, her eyes darting from Mason to me and back again.
Mason folded his arms across his chest and raised an eyebrow at me. “Are you done yelling yet?” he asked mildly. “Would you like me to explain?”
“Explain?” I asked, incredulously. “You think there’s some way to explain this? God, I don’t know why I ever trusted you in the first place.” I angrily dashed away a few tears that spilled down my cheeks. I wasn’t going to cry now, not in front of him. Save that for later, in private.
Mason’s face softened, and for a second, I thought he was going to reach for me. I was all prepared to take a step back. But instead, he put his hand on the other woman’s back, just like he had before, that same overly-familiar gesture that had started this whole thing. I swallowed hard and looked away.
“This is Sarah,” he said. “My brother David’s fiancée and music agent.”
For a moment, everything was silent. I stared at the other woman, feeling a blush creep up over my features. But still, that didn’t make sense. “So what were the two of you doing upstairs together?” I asked suspiciously. “I saw you tucking in your shirt.”
Sarah looked embarrassed. “Oh God, this is all my fault. The port-a-potties were just so nasty that I begged Mason to let me use one of the indoor toilets,” she said. “He was headed into the barn with the ladder from the photo shoot anyway, so he said I could use the bathroom in his apartment.”
I blinked at the two of them. Stunned and horribly embarrassed. No wonder I was doomed with his family.
“Oh,” I said, stupidly.
I couldn’t believe I’d been so quick to jump to conclusions. I felt so foolish, especially after I’d already had problems getting his family to like me. Now I’d gone and alienated another brother and future sister-in-law.
Unexpectedly, Sarah started laughing. “I like her, Mason,” she said, her eyes twinkling. “It’s good to know she’s not going to let you get away with shit and that she’s willing to stand up to you. I bet she’ll really be good for you.”
“She already has been,” Mason said fondly, smiling at me tentatively.
“Why don’t I give the two of you a minute?” Sarah suggested. “Seems like you might have a couple things to talk about, and I think David is still trying to win me a teddy bear over at the ring toss. I’m going to make sure that poor worker gets to go home for the night.”
Mason laughed. “That’s probably a good idea,” he said. “My brother David is nothing if not persistent, generally about the stupidest things! If he really wanted a teddy bear for you, we could have just given him one.”
“I think I’m beyond the stage of needing a teddy bear from my fiancé, anyway,” Sarah said, grinning and shaking her head ruefully. She walked off, and Mason turned to face me.
“So,” he said, frowning. “Did you really think I was cheating on you?”
“Yes, no. I don’t know. I guess I didn’t,” I admitted with a sigh. “I didn’t like the idea, of course, and didn’t want to believe it.” It was so much more complicated than that, and I didn’t know how to describe it. Sure, I’d felt a stab of jealousy when I’d seen them walking down the stairs, and I’d tried to find some rationale for what they’d been doing up there. But deep down, I hadn’t really believed it. It was just the only conclusion I could come up with.
I felt terrible for having jumped to conclusions like that, and for having yelled at him for being a player, especially when he had been so kind to me over the past few weeks. I bit my lower lip. “I’m really sorry.”
“Have I done something that would make you think I was cheating on you?” Mason asked, sounding genuinely confused. “Other than coming downstairs with Sarah, which I’ll agree must have looked strange, but I didn’t think it was that suspicious.”
I shrugged, “It’s just, well I’d heard all the rumors. That you were quite the player before I came into town. And then there was the whole thing with Ella.” I paused. “I want to trust you, I really do, but it seems like there’s just so much up in the air between us.”
Mason’s brow furrowed. “I didn’t realize there was that much that was up in the air,” he said. “I’ve been pretty clear about my feelings for you, right from the start. I told you that I wanted to help on the farm because I wanted you to be able to save it, so that you could stick around. I haven’t so much as looked at another woman since that first night, when you and I danced together.”
I stared at him for a long moment and then sighed, looking away from him. “I believe you,” I told him. “But that doesn’t mean that anything has been resolved. We haven’t talked about any of this.”
“You mean the fact that you’re leaving,” Mason said. There was something bitter in his voice, and when I looked at him in surprise, it was his turn to look away.
“I haven’t decided if I’m leaving yet,” I told him. “I’m still weighing my options; you know that.”
“I know that,” Mason said. “And I know that you’re afraid to commit to a relationship with me until you decide what you want to do. I think you’re just looking for excuses to forget about me. That’s why you were so quick to believe that I was fooling around with Sarah upstairs.”
I bit my lower lip. “You’re probably right,” I admitted. It had nothing to do with whether or not I trusted him, really. It had to do with whether or not I trusted myself to be with him, and to stay with him.
But I just didn’t know what to do. I had never expected to fall for someone so quickly. I had expected it would take a while to fall in love, and that when I fell in love, it would be with someone where everything just worked out. I knew that was silly, that things didn’t ever come together that easily, but I had never expected to have to make such a huge decision like where to live based on a tenuous relationship I had with a man.
Glancing over towards David and Sarah, I shook my head. “Why didn’t you tell me that your brother and his fiancée were coming?” I asked him. “You didn’t even tell me that they were in town.”
I didn’t know why that bothered me so much. Partly because if I’d known that Sarah was there, we might have avoided the whole awkward conversation about Mason ‘cheating’ on me with her. But I also felt like if we were really in a relationship, I should know when his brother was coming to town. Details like that shouldn’t be forgotten.
“It was a surprise,” Mason said. “Do you want to meet them?”
“Sarah’s never going to let me live down the fact that I accused you of cheating on me with her,” I worried.
Mason laughed. “Maybe not, she
may tease you about it, but I doubt she’s upset about it.” He raised an eyebrow at me. “I’m quite the catch, aren’t I?”
“You’re full of yourself,” I said, rolling my eyes. I paused. “Before we go meet them, though. Mason—are we in a relationship? You and me?”
“Oh Abi, of course we are,” Mason said, sounding sad that I had to ask. He put an arm around my shoulders and led me over towards the other couple.
“Hi David,” I said, shaking his hand and noting the calloused palms. “I’ve heard a lot about you from Kinsey,” I laughed, the sound only slightly strained. “Wish you’d hurry up and come back so that Kinsey could get rid of these crazy theme nights he’s come up with!”
David chuckled, “Yeah, Mason and Luke were telling me about those,” he said. “A wet t-shirt contest with a bunch of old men doesn’t really seem like a selling point to me, but then, this is a weird little town, don’t you think?”
“Yeah, definitely,” I said.
“You know, Mason has never introduced me to a girlfriend before,” David said, his eyes twinkling. “You must be pretty special.”
I raised an eyebrow at Mason, who was rolling his eyes at his brother. But he tugged me a little closer beneath his arm as well. “She is pretty special,” he said to his brother. “In fact,” he turned to face me with a serious expression, “I know we started this just to save the farm, and I’m pretty sure we’ve done that by now. So I guess now there’s only one thing left to do.”
He reached in his pocket and pulled out a small, black box. “I know you still haven’t made your decision on whether you’re staying or leaving, but I want you to know that if you stay, I’m here for you, to love and support you, for the rest of your days. And if you leave, I hope you know that you’re not going anywhere without me on your heels.”