In For a Pound

by Joselyn Vaughn

  Joshua couldn’t take it another minute, and—no matter what the doctor said—he was determined to haul his dad out to the car. He grabbed his keys when his dad coughed a rattly bark and his throat cleared. His agitation eased, and his color returned. He fell asleep, finally relaxed.

  Joshua let his phone fall out of his hand and thump the couch. His fingers ached from clutching it. He stretched them to work out the kinks, then rubbed his eyes. Some days, keeping an eye on his dad was easy: make sure he ate, make sure he took his meds, make sure he didn’t do too much. Today, he twisted in knots, wondering if this was a coughing fit or a symptom of something worse. While his job trained him for basic first aid, watching his dad struggle wasn’t in the field guide. He’d rather face cleanup after an EF5 tornado than go through the last hour again. Drag his dad to the doctor or not? This treatment had been a roller coaster. What would the next one bring?

  Nervous energy burned in his muscles. He needed to go for a run or a bike ride; he’d even consider a paddle around the lake—with the right company. After this morning, though, he didn’t dare leave his dad alone. He stood and walked to the kitchen, his joints snapping and crackling after being relieved of their tense position. He opened the refrigerator, scanned the contents, then shut the door again. He couldn’t eat. His eyes fell on Aunt Penny’s number in the emergency numbers on the door, so he grabbed the phone.

  Thankfully, Aunt Penny was free, and she could come over and sit with his dad for an hour. She arrived in less time than it took to pull on his running shorts and tie his shoes. When she arrived, he wanted to hug her, and he did. She squeezed him tightly, and some of the tension left his body.

  “You call me anytime.”

  “I’ve got my phone, so you can get a hold of me.” He pointed to the contraption strapped to his arm.

  She shoved him toward the door. “Now get out of here.”

  Joshua drove to the park. A few minutes later, he was striding down one of the trails that dove down a hill through the woods circling the lake. His head cleared a little with each step. He passed the beach where the canoe race had been and swept past the pavilion area. An image of Sidney in her swimming suit popped into his head. Aunt Penny had done a lot of terrifying things to him, but he’d rate tossing him in Sidney’s canoe in the good column.

  On the far side, he saw a tent with people handing out brochures. He wasn’t in the mood to talk to anyone, so he hit a side path away from the solicitors. It took him around a curve, down a small hill, and past a circular grove of pines. As he came back up the hill, he saw a woman sitting at the foot of one of the trees. Her knees were pulled up to her chest and her arms and forehead rested on them. As he was about to exit the area, something about the woman’s ponytail caught his attention.

  Sidney? He back-pedaled a couple steps. What was she doing here? Was she crying? She lifted her head and brushed the back of her hand across her eyes. He had his answer.

  Crap. She probably hadn’t seen him. He could sneak down the path and forget he’d seen the heartache burned on her face. Her head went down again, and her shoulders shuddered. But he couldn’t erase the sadness of her demeanor from his mind. Whatever was wrong, she shouldn’t be alone. It was the least he could do after all she’d done for his dad.

  Joshua strode across the pine needle laden ground. Not wanting to startle her, he cleared his throat, and her head jerked up. She quickly blinked and swiped tears across her cheeks. Mascara smeared, leaving gray, salty traces on her skin. He wished he could offer her a tissue or a handkerchief, but all he had was a sweaty T-shirt. She sniffed and tried to plaster a smile on her face, but the edges of her lips couldn’t sell the expression. Her eyes were rimmed with red, and Joshua guessed she’d probably been crying for longer than he’d been running.

  He knelt in front of her, not knowing what to say and wishing with everything he was worth she’d claim allergies and he could continue on his run with an easy heart. Whatever his heart wanted, his gut told him no one—and especially not Sidney—cried in the park because of allergies.

  “Is everything okay?” What a dumb question. Joy tumbled through him at seeing her, but he would have chosen any other circumstances than finding her sobbing.

  She took a shuddering breath and tried to speak, but her eyes drifted to the other side of the pine grove, and her lips trembled. Joshua glanced around, not seeing who or what upset her. Removing her from the area would be best. Privacy and a chance to wash up might give her a fresh perspective.

  He took her hand and tugged her gently to her feet. “Let’s get you home.”

  She nodded feebly and allowed him to steer her to the parking lot. He aimed for a path away from the solicitors and anyone else enjoying the park on this beautiful afternoon. He wrapped his arm around her shoulders, hoping to shield her from the prying questions of anyone passing close enough to see the misery on her face.

  As they hustled to the parking lot, Joshua then realized Sidney was in no condition to drive. He guided her toward his truck and opened the passenger door for her. She barely blinked before climbing into the cab and cinching the seatbelt over her lap.

  Joshua hustled to the driver’s side and unlaced the key from his shoe. He jumped into the seat and fired the engine. “You’ll have to give me directions,” he said as they pulled out of the parking lot.

  ****

  “I’m just around the block from your dad’s.” Sidney managed between sniffles. Her eyes were rubbed raw and her sinuses packed with glue. Why did she let herself cry in the park? She faced the window. Colin, the one person she was supposed to be able to trust more than anyone, had betrayed her. She couldn’t decide whether she was more upset with Colin for hiding so much or with herself for not seeing his faults.

  The scenery blurred past. Why did she let herself cry at all? The pressure built in her forehead, and she could count the minutes before a doozy of a headache flared.

  The road around the park was pot-holed. The bumps jounced her head no matter how tentatively Joshua steered the truck.

  Sidney closed her eyes to ignore the see-sawing motion of the vehicle. Why did Joshua have to be the one to find her? Why had she stayed in the park? She should have hurried home rather than allow the emotions to overwhelm her in front of half of Pine Bottom.

  They hit a particularly big hole. Her stomach lurched and made that unpleasant, floaty roller coaster drop. The lose-her-stomach feeling magnified with the realization she had stayed in the park, hoping Colin would come back, that he would apologize and understand what upset her.

  But he didn’t.

  Hadn’t even looked back as he rejoined his new friends at the tent. Another sob threatened.

  Joshua reached in front of her and punched the glove box. The door clunked open, and a couple years’ worth of registrations and insurance cards spilled out at Sidney’s feet.

  “Sorry. There’s a packet of tissue or some napkins in there.”

  Sidney bent forward and scooped the papers off the floor mat. She straightened them into a tidy pile, then stuffed them under a tire pressure gauge and a Philips head screwdriver. She searched a bit and tugged a crumpled napkin out. It, however, would be useless. Bracing her abdomen, she squeezed her eyes shut. Her stomach roiled as if she rode a canoe on the high seas during a hurricane. She clapped the napkin over her mouth.

  “Um—” was all she managed to get out before her forehead broke out in a cold sweat. She heard the splattering on the floor mat before her brain registered the need for a bucket.

  As if this afternoon wasn’t bad enough. The musing swept through her mind as the truck jerked to a halt. Joshua’s door creaked open, and the springs in the seat squawked when he jumped out.

  Sidney slipped her hand along the door searching for the handle. Upon grasping it, she pushed the door open, intending to tumble to the ground and finish emptying her stomach into the grass.

  Instead, the seatbelt arrested her descent, and her eruptions met another target—Joshua�
��s chest. This was going to take a month of meals for him and Buck to make up for.

  He reached around her and released the buckle, then caught her as she scrambled out of the vehicle. Fresh air, she sighed. It filtered into her lungs, diffusing the nausea, and bringing the humiliation to the forefront. She coughed, heaving nothing but sharp pains to her ribs and throat. If she could choose a day to do over, this one would definitely make the top three.

  She crouched into the scraggly grass along the ditch, waiting for her stomach to confirm its return to normal. Joshua’s arm slid around her shoulders. She was tempted to chew some grass to erase the bile coating her mouth. Gravel dug into her knees, and the weeds scratched at her shirt.

  Joshua knelt beside her and rubbed her back. As she stared at the gravel in front of her, she tried to imagine Colin beside her, but the image wouldn’t hold. If she had thrown up in his beater of a car, he would have been livid, huffing about how the smell would never come out of the upholstery.

  She slumped backwards onto her bum and brushed her arm across her face. “Sorry.” She peeked at Joshua through her eyelashes. If he had any concern about her lunch sluicing around his floorboards, he didn’t show it. He appeared more worried about her.

  He edged his shirt over his head, being careful to keep the filthy side away from his face. He folded the yuck inside and wiped her chin and hands, then checked his own arms and neck.

  Sidney scanned his exposed skin for bits of her lunch, but got lost in the ripples of his biceps and pectoral muscles. Her pulse spiked, flooding her head with a new kind of dizziness. Just because she wanted to yank Colin’s teeth out didn’t mean she could or should ogle Joshua.

  He smoothed her hair away from her face. “No problem. Are you okay?”

  Sidney didn’t know. Something big was happening here, and she didn’t see how she could go back to the way her relationships were. But she also couldn’t see how the path in front of her curved.

  Joshua’s caring without commitment was worse. She had plans and schedules, and she followed them to the letter. Colin had fit, but now she feared he was a piece that appeared to work until she tried to line up the next piece. She couldn’t move forward until the right piece was in place.

  She coughed again. Joshua flinched and scooted back an inch or two. “My stomach’s okay. I hope.” She couldn’t answer to the rest of it.

  “I might have some water in the truck.” He patted her shoulder ending with a little squeeze she wished she could curl up in. He settled on the ground beside her a moment later with a bottled water. “It’s not cold, but…”

  “Thank you.” She unscrewed the cap and rinsed her mouth. It did so much for helping her to feel human again. She splashed some on her face and cleansed away the stiffness from the dried tears. It even did a bit to clear her foggy perspective. She forced a smile, and the act didn’t feel completely foreign to her facial muscles.

  Joshua yanked the floor mat out of the truck and flipped it over in the weeds. He scrubbed it across the grass, then tossed it into the truck bed.

  Sidney pushed herself to her feet as the head rush swayed her. “I’ll wash your shirt.” She grimaced, remembering the stain down the front of his t-shirt.

  “Don’t worry about it. Are you sure you’re all right? You look flushed.”

  Sidney tried to say ‘yes’, but she couldn’t form the word. She wrapped her arms around her chest. “It’s all a mess.”

  “It always is.” He gestured to the truck. “What do you want to do?”

  Her voice was hoarse. “Home.” Back to her space, where her world hadn’t flipped upside down. Wiping her hands on her shorts, she climbed back into the truck and rebuckled her seatbelt.

  Joshua gave her a once over. Her demeanor may have appeared together, but her head felt like spaghetti swirling in oil. She wasn’t sure if she wanted him to believe the facade or ask for details.

  Kicking herself at each step, she wanted to spill the whole story. Have someone share her outrage. She didn’t want to tell her mom and Bailey about the bank withdrawal until she’d talked to Colin, but Colin’s reaction was just… wrong.

  Joshua took his seat and angled the truck back on the road.

  “It’s just that… I’m not sure…” She shook her head to sort out the confusion. “I’m not sure…” Could she say it? Could she say Colin was the one any more? Speaking the words would confirm what she thought. “It’s Colin.”

  Joshua turned off the road to the park and onto a paved one. “What about Colin?” His voice was tight. He didn’t want to hear this, she reminded herself. He didn’t want to be her confidant. She’d already emptied her stomach on him; he didn’t need to wear her anguish too. She should keep her mouth shut. Wait and talk to her mom or Penny later.

  Sidney pressed her palms to her forehead. What would her mother say? She liked Colin. She’d convince Sidney to give it time, to talk it over with Colin, but Sidney wasn’t ready to forgive. Her anger and frustration needed to vent before she could think rationally.

  “Today might have been the last straw.”

  The truck jerked as if Joshua’s foot had slipped off the gas. She braced herself against the door, but once she’d initiated the flood, it couldn’t be stopped.

  “I’ve never had doubts about our relationship, but Colin has been so different lately. Then today…”

  Joshua had turned onto her street now. The truck slowed considerably. She indicated the brick house she rented at the end of the block. “What happened today?”

  “Would you be upset if your girlfriend took money out of your bank account?”

  Joshua waited a beat before answering, and she could tell he weighed his answer. “Depends on the circumstances. If she asked, and I knew she needed it.”

  Sidney sighed. “He asked, but I don’t know that he needed it. He took everything.”

  “He didn’t tell you how much he was going to withdraw?”

  Sidney rested her arm against the door and fussed with a loose piece of window seal. “Said he needed to order something on-line, and he doesn’t have on-line account access. So I said sure. He made it sound like it’d only be a few bucks. A hundred at most, but he emptied my account.”

  Joshua slammed on the brakes. Sidney flung her hands forward to brace herself against the dashboard. Her stomach bounced, and she gulped air to keep its remaining contents in place.

  Joshua twisted in his seat. “He took everything?”

  Sidney peeled her hands off the vinyl, adrenaline pumping in her throat. “Why did you just stop?”

  Joshua ignored her question. “He took everything? That’s why you were in the park?” His hand curled into a fist and pounded the steering wheel.

  “He was at the tent with those people who were hounding everyone who walked by. Wait, why are you so upset? What does this have to do with you?”

  The violence of his reaction shocked her. A little voice whispered that maybe he cared. She dismissed it, arguing he was simply a caring person. Any caring person would be outraged.

  “You confronted him. What did he say?” He spit the words out like gravel.

  “He said he’d have it back by Monday, but I don’t understand.” Was no one going to react the way she expected today? The rock Joshua had been mashed to quicksand. “We are stopped in the middle of the road.” They were three houses from her driveway. She was so close to quiet, to safety. If they sat here much longer, the neighbors would start creating stories. Joshua wasn’t wearing a shirt, and she’d have another kettle of trouble. Her stomach gurgled.

  “But you were thinking about breaking up with him.”

  “Yes... No… I don’t know.” She waved her hands as if to clear the confusion. “Can we not talk about this in the middle of the street?” Five seconds. Five. They could be in her driveway. Ten, and she could be locked in her apartment. Fifteen, in her bathroom.

  Joshua checked the driver’s side window as if he’d forgotten he’d jammed on the brakes. “Right. Whi
ch house is yours?”

  Sidney pointed two driveways up.

  “Penny’s?”

  “I rent the upstairs apartment.”

  Joshua moved the truck onto the concrete slab and shifted into park. He cut the engine, and Sidney reached for the door handle. It released easier than she expected, and she tumbled to the ground. Joshua hurried around the truck in time to pick her up off the pavement. He brushed the grit off her knees as she skittered backward.

  “So…” he said.

  Her gaze drifted down his bare chest, and she lost her train of thought. She needed to put this day to rest, get her brain off the seesaw. Her problems needed to be sorted out without the distraction of the man in front of her.

  “Right. Umm…” Joshua ran his hand over his hair, then grabbed the open door and studied a chip in the paint. “Look, I’m probably not the person you need to talk to about all of this, but I’ll listen if you need me.”

  Every time she thought she’d found level ground today, her foundation tipped. Her head ached. She couldn’t think. “Yeah. Thanks.” She looped her arm around his neck and gave him a squeeze, and tried unsuccessfully to block the warmth of his body next to hers. Her stomach swirled again, and she released him before there was a viewing of the last tablespoon of her stomach contents. Her hands dropped to her sides, and she stepped around him. “Thanks for taking me home.” She scurried to her stairs like a rat darting away from the light. Once she was safely locked in her bathroom, nothing else could go wrong.

  ****

  Joshua closed the truck door, leaving his hand on the frame for a moment. What had come over him? Jumping all over her to find out her decision about Colin? Why did he even care? It wasn’t his business. However, it irked him to know a man could treat a woman as kind and giving as Sidney so disrespectfully. He came across this behavior often in his line of work, and it made him want to wring someone’s neck.