“Yes.”
“Are they looking for Rowdy, too?”
“Yes. I received a phone call to check you out.”
“You’ve done that. I’ve proven I couldn’t have been with her today. Those texts prove I don’t wish her any harm. Now call the Arizona police back and tell them to find that woman-beating-bastard before he kills her.”
Bell grabbed his arm before he took another step closer to the officer. “Dane, he’s just doing his job.”
“She should be home with her daughter. You’re wasting time standing here talking to me. I didn’t do anything to her. I’ve been stuck here, sitting on my ass.” He pointed to his leg. “They need to find that asshole. I told her time and again to stay away from that fuck. I told her, one of these days he’d lose his mind and kill her. Please, you’ve got to find her before it’s too late.”
The officer handed back his phone. “If you hear from Brandy, please let us know.”
“If you find out anything, I want to know.”
“I’ll see what I can do, Mr. Bowden. Thank you for your cooperation.”
Dane stood beside Bell, watching the officer drive away.
“I’m sorry, Dane. You must be so worried. I had no idea about her past.”
“Rowdy never could take no for an answer. He wanted her and didn’t care if she didn’t want him. Things were good sometimes. Until they weren’t. She kept going back, because she remembered the man from those good times. Hell, she’d fallen in love with that man. Hard to reconcile he was the same man who hit her when he got drunk and jealous.”
“Did you two ever, you know?”
“Once,” he answered honestly. “She was sad and lonely one night after a fight with Rowdy. I missed home and had been on the road far too long without company. I teased and joked with her to make her laugh. One thing led to another, and we ended up in bed. We both woke up in the morning with a hangover and a bad case of regret. We were friends before that night and didn’t want to ruin a good thing, so we never spoke about it. We both forgot it ever happened so we could still be friends.”
Bell nodded and wrapped her arms around her middle. To ward off the cold, or to comfort herself, he didn’t know. He took a chance and rubbed his hands up and down her arms to warm her up.
“Bell, I swear, nothing ever happened again after that night. I don’t harbor any feelings for her other than being a good friend.”
“Why do you send her money?”
“She lives with her parents. Her father had a stroke a year ago. The medical bills are more than she and her mother can handle. Sometimes she runs short and needs money to buy food and diapers. I help her out when she needs it. Which is another reason Rowdy hates me. I apparently stomp on his manhood every time I provide for his family.”
“Why doesn’t he take care of Brandy?”
“Because he’s an asshole, who thinks he can control her by keeping her destitute. He spends his money on booze and video games and dragging his ass to rodeos, where he always loses. It’s a wonder he hasn’t gotten himself killed.”
“I’m sorry, Dane. The last thing you need right now is me questioning your motives.”
“You can ask me anything you want.”
“Do you want a hug?”
“Hell, yes.” He tossed the crutches aside and pulled her in close. She rose up on her toes and wrapped her arms around his neck. Her head pressed to the side of his and her chin sat propped on his shoulder. Even better, her whole body ran down the length of his. He desperately tried to remember she offered only comfort, so he took it in and tried not to think the worst had happened to Brandy.
“It’s going to be all right.”
“I wish I had your optimism, Bell. I’m worried it’s already too late.” He sucked in a huge breath and sighed it out, holding her close. “Damn, but you smell even better than you look in that dress.”
“I need to go, but I hate to leave you with this bad news unresolved.”
He hugged her tighter, then let her loose to stand in front of him, his hands on her shoulders, his fingers lightly caressing her soft neck.
“You should have worn a heavier coat.”
“Look who’s talking.”
“I’m always too warm when I’m around you,” he admitted. Right now, his blood ran hot for her, despite his mind being occupied with thoughts of Brandy. “Go home, Bell. Get some sleep so you’re fresh for surgery tomorrow. People are depending on you. I’ll be okay. Nothing I can do tonight anyway but wait and see what the cops find out now that they’re looking at the right person again.”
“They’ll find her.”
“I hope so.” But would it be too late?
He bent and grabbed his crutches. Bell helped him get them under his arms. She reached up and touched the side of his face. He leaned into her palm and soaked up her comfort again. It helped knowing she cared.
“Call me tomorrow if you hear anything.”
“I’ll call you tomorrow no matter what,” he said, knowing he’d need to at least hear her voice in order to stay sane. He’d definitely need another hug.
Chapter 11
Bell snagged the ringing phone from the stack of books on the table by her favorite chair and fell onto her stomach on the bed. Anxious, the butterflies in her belly took flight. The rush of anticipation made her light-headed.
“Hi, Dane.”
“What’s up, Doc?”
“What’s with the strange voice?”
“Bugs Bunny holding a carrot like a cigar, talking to Elmer Fudd.”
She didn’t get the reference.
“We need to schedule a Looney Tunes marathon. You can’t possibly go through life without watching cartoons.”
Ah, now she got it. “Don’t you think I’m a little old to watch cartoons?”
“You are never too old for cartoons. Besides, when you have kids, you’ll be forced to endure an endless stream of them.”
“If I let my kids watch TV.”
“Harsh. You can’t deny them Looney Tunes laughs. Seriously, that’s child abuse.”
Sometimes Dane acted like a big kid, but deep down he just liked to have fun. He made her want to have fun. He never made her feel uncomfortable about the things she didn’t know. Instead, he explained them and moved on. He didn’t belittle her idiosyncrasies. He thought them appealing.
“Any word on Brandy?”
“Nothing about her. Even worse, nothing about Rowdy. He never came home.”
“That’s not good. It only makes him look guiltier.”
“He is guilty. Of what, I wish I knew, for Brandy and Kaley’s sake.”
“They’ll find him.”
“What are you doing?” he asked, changing the subject.
“I just finished a book.”
“More rain-forest frogs?”
“Not tonight. A mystery novel.”
“You’re tired.”
“Why do you say that?”
“When you’re amped, you read things you’re interested in learning about. Frogs. The Great Barrier Reef. Italian food by region. Last week you read some psychology book about patients with cancer.”
“I have a patient suffering from bone cancer. I wanted to know how best to help him.”
“Which is what makes you a great doctor. You’re not just interested in his disease and how it’s affecting his bones. You want to know how it’s affecting his mind.”
“The mind-body connection is well documented. The evidence is substantial. If I can find a way to keep his spirits up and help him with a positive attitude, that may help in his recovery.”
“Absolutely. Look how well I’m doing.”
“You are the epitome of a positive attitude, except when you just have attitude.”
“Harsh. But true. I’m still frustrated this is taking so long.”
“Patience is not your strong suit.”
“Hey, I’ve been nothing but patient with you. Look at me, calling you every night. You haven’t calle
d me once.”
“I don’t have to. If it’s nine-thirty, you’re calling me.” Bell smiled and stared at her dingy ceiling. “I like that you call me every night. At first, I wasn’t so sure this would work out.”
“You thought I’d get bored and move on after four days.”
“Two, actually. But you didn’t. Even when I have no idea what you’re talking about, you still find things for us to discuss that keeps it fun and interesting. How else would I have found out you like to cook and you want to plant a garden?”
“You inspired me with all that talk of tomatoes. I found three types of peppers to plant. They range from mild to hot. I ordered the seeds. They should be here early next week.”
“Look at you. You went from rodeo champ to farmer inside a month.”
“I’m fucking going out of my mind, sitting around doing nothing.”
“The physical therapist said you’re coming along. The bone . . .”
“Stop. This is not doctor-patient time, it’s let’s-be-friends time.”
“Sorry. So, what did you do today?”
“Worked on the house. It’s coming along. Slowly. The kitchen countertops look awesome. The new carpet is thick and plush. It took me six hours to paint one room standing on one leg.”
“Hire someone to do it. You can afford it.”
“I need something to do.”
“Which room did you paint?”
“I did the master bedroom earlier in the week. The master bath yesterday. Today, I did one of the spare rooms. I’m working my way from the upstairs down. It’s made a big difference. The rooms feel different.”
“Not like your parents’ room but yours.”
“Exactly. I’m calling this my transition period. Soon I’ll have the house done, my leg will be healed, and I’ll be back to working the ranch.”
“You’ve got your ranch hands and Blake and Gabe handling it now, right?”
“Yes, Doctor. As ordered, I’ve stayed clear of doing the manual labor around here. Well, except for working on the house.”
“Okay. You’ve been good.”
“Do I get a reward?”
She smiled. Yes, definitely like a child, he needed to get something for behaving. “What did you have in mind?”
“Come outside.”
She sat up on the bed, her feet planted on the threadbare rug. “What?”
“I’m sitting in my truck outside your house at the end of the drive. I miss you. Come out and see me.”
She raked her fingers through the side of her hair and lay her hand on the back of her neck. “You saw me three days ago at the benefit.”
“Too long, Bell. Get out here.” He hung up on her.
Bell stared at her phone, completely taken off guard. He’d come to her house. In the few weeks they’d been back in Crystal Creek, she’d kept things as uncomplicated as possible. Yes, she took his calls, but that seemed the safest way to get to know the intriguing man without actually having to spend time in his company. He made her feel weird all over when he was near. She couldn’t think straight around him. Her thoughts got all jumbled up between being his doctor and trying not to stare at his wide shoulders and handsome face. Sometimes he smiled at her and every thought left her head. He made her feel tingly and hot. She wanted to pull him close and smell the horses, hay, and woodsy scent he carried around with him like a second skin.
Should she go outside and see him?
Her grandmother would have a fit. Her meeting a man in the driveway. Such things were not done.
Why not? Who would really care what she did? Her grandmother. The woman didn’t approve anything she ever did. Why did she always try to be so good and do the best at everything? No one cared. No one noticed. Every accomplishment she’d ever achieved had been met with indifference or criticism. She was tired of doing what she thought others wanted and not doing what made her happy.
Dane wanted to see her. He liked her. She liked him. Why not do what pleased her and not worry about what other people thought—people who didn’t matter anyway.
She stood and caught her reflection in the mirror above her dresser. For the first time, she tried to see herself as a man would look at her. She tried to see what Dane saw. He liked her eyes. They did stand out against her dark hair and eyebrows. She tried a smile. She’d always thought herself passably pretty. Now she felt it. She had Dane to thank for that. He found her attractive. The man knew something about beautiful women. She’d never look like one of those Dane’s Dames. She didn’t want to look like any of them. She wanted to be her, the woman who drew his attention and had him calling her every night at the same time.
Her phone rang. The man who waited outside for her impatiently. She accepted the call and put the phone to her ear.
“You’re taking too long. Stop thinking and come out here and see me.” He hung up on her again.
She laughed. She couldn’t remember ever laughing this much in her life. He was good for her. She liked the way he made her feel. The new things she’d been thinking about these last weeks. Like maybe she didn’t have to spend her life alone with no friends. She liked spending time with his family. Maybe she’d given up too soon on others because she’d always been waiting for them to leave her, or criticize her and make her feel small. Like her grandmother. Well, not anymore.
She walked out of her bedroom and through the living room. About to open the front door, she stopped at her grandmother’s voice.
“Where do you think you’re going?”
“To meet a friend. I’ll be back in a little while.”
“Who is this so-called friend?” Her grandmother took another puff on her filterless cigarette, spewing even more smoke into the hazy, musty room.
“His name is Dane.”
“Well, now. I knew you’d grow up to be just like your mother. Nothing but a whore.”
“I’m nothing of the sort, Grandmother.”
“Don’t you sass me, girl. I see who you really are inside. Always have. You should pray for your sins. Pray He forgives you. Repent for all you’ve done and all you are. A man comes calling in the middle of the night for one reason.”
Usually Bell would defend herself. Lay out her arguments to prove her point. Not tonight. Let her grandmother think whatever she wanted. Nothing ever stopped her from saying and thinking what she wanted anyway.
Bell opened the door just as her grandmother yelled, “You are nothing but a whore.” She spotted Dane’s red truck in the driveway, just beyond the circle of light cast by the outdoor lamp. She walked to the passenger side when he leaned over to open the door. She caught it as he pushed it open and smiled.
“Hi.”
“Hey, pretty girl. Wanna go for a ride?”
“No. You shouldn’t be driving.”
“My left leg is the one busted up. I can drive now that I’m off the meds.”
“I’m sorry, you’re right.” She stared at her feet and kicked a loose rock under the truck.
Dane stared at the top of her head. If he could, he’d get out, go to her, and wrap her in his arms and just hold her. She looked so beautifully broken.
“Climb on up. Have a seat. Let’s finish our talk.”
She surprised him and took the seat beside him, staring at the lonesome cabin. The place needed work. Or a bulldozer. No one had done any repairs or upgrades to the old place in the last twenty years.
“Your chicken coop needs to be rebuilt. That wood is rotting away to nothing.”
“I read a couple of books on carpentry and building coops. It looks easier in the books than it is to actually do.”
“Come now, Doc, you can’t tell me you couldn’t build one. You’re great with your hands.”
“Maybe in an operating room, but with my grandfather’s tools, not so much.” She sighed out more than her frustration over the coop and the tools.
Better just get it out of the way. If he was going to keep seeing her, eventually they’d have to talk about her grandmother. Th
ey’d talked about her childhood in general ways. Mostly from her perspective and all about herself. She never mentioned her grandmother, or the rest of her family, in anything more than general terms. Mostly it came out as a slip. Something that nagged at her but which she didn’t mean to reveal. It’s like they didn’t exist. Or she didn’t want them to. He understood, but he’d set out on this journey to be a good man for her by keeping things real and sticking to the truth.
This ramshackle of a place with the evil chain-smoking grandmother inside was her truth.
“Did I seriously hear your grandmother call you a whore?”
She wrapped her arms around her middle. She did that when he made her uncomfortable. He wondered how many times she’d wished for someone else to wrap their arms around her and make it all better. Like she did when she hugged him the other night.
“Yes.”
“You told her I came to see you.”
“For your booty call.”
That made him laugh. “That just sounds weird coming from you, Doc.”
Bell shook her head. “I need to stop trying to say things the way you do.”
“First, I’d never say booty call. Second, when you get things wrong or use the wrong term, we laugh about it. It’s fun.”
“For you.”
“Bell, I’d never laugh about anything you said or did at your expense. If I made you think that, I’m sorry.”
Bell released her sides and clamped her hands on the edge of the seat. “It’s not you. I let her get to me. Again. Every time. I don’t know why I even try, or why I care.”
“That’s simple, Bell. You know the answer.”
“She will never give me her approval. She will never accept me, or think anything I’ve done is good enough.”
“And it hurts. To be rejected, ridiculed, made to feel like you’re anything less than perfect.”
“I’m not perfect.”
“I think you are. You’re an amazing doctor. You’re kind to everyone you meet. You never say anything bad about anyone, including your family. They deserve it, but you don’t stoop to their level. You hold your head high, because deep down you know the truth.”
“What is that?”
“You’re better than them.”
Her Lucky Cowboy Page 18