by Hawke Oakley
“No, I really don’t, I’m a slut and I need it now,” I complained.
Riley laughed and I was about to shoot him a bratty glare when he pressed his lips to the head of my cock, and then I utterly melted. I groaned, although it sounded more like I was crying, and raised my hips greedily. I needed more.
“Please, Riley,” I breathed.
He closed his eyes and took the whole head into his mouth, humming an acknowledgement to me. The vibrations sent a shock up my spine. I bit my lip. I couldn’t fucking take this. With one hand he kept slowly stroking the lower half of my cock, and the other ran softly across my inner thigh. I whimpered and squirmed as the terrible hot pleasure knotting below my stomach tightened even further.
His mouth moved. Slowly, he took more of my cock past his lips and I thought I would fucking die right there. I peeked an eye open to watch and he was so sexy. His lashes were fluttered shut across his cheeks in concentration, and his lips were red and swollen from making out so fiercely earlier. Just the sight of him like that made me feel like I was gonna blow my load.
I sat up on one elbow so I could pet him. He made a muffled sound as my fingers threaded through his hair, and opened his dark eyes to glance up at me. His pupils were blown and his whole face was flushed. I had to look away before I came.
“God, fucking, Damnit,” I snapped. “It’s not fair how sexy you are right now.”
Riley purred in response, making my cock throb. Everything was wet, burning heat. Sweat trickled down my temples and my ribcage shuddered with every breath. I needed to cum, soon.
Then something else was touching me. My body went rigid.
Riley’s finger was circling my entrance. Teasing me. I groaned.
“Is this okay?” he asked, popping his mouth off my cock for a moment.
“Fuck. Fuck. God. Fuck.”
“Aaron.”
“Guh?”
“I won’t go all the way in. I’m just… testing the waters. One finger. Is that okay?”
I was already nodding before he finished asking. “God. Yes. Fuck.”
Then I heard him spit. A moment later the wet, cool pressure of his finger was back and I groaned. Then the hot, salivating pool of his mouth went back to sucking my cock and it took everything I had not to explode right then and there. I whined, long and needy, arching my back and feeling sluttier than I had in my whole life.
He sucked, languidly, as the tip of his finger teased barely inside my ass. I wanted to buck into it, needed more of him inside me, but I forced myself to remember this was his first time doing anything like this. I exhaled shakily and let him go at his own pace.
My jaw went slack and I must have been drooling like an idiot by the time he got a third of his finger in. He’d pushed past the ring of muscle, making me shiver and whimper with need. Then, very slowly, at the same time as he hollowed his cheeks and sucked my cock, he pushed up to what must have been half his finger. I didn’t last long enough to find out if he could have gone in further. My body tensed, electric shocks of pleasure rippling up and down my spine and my vision turning white around the edges as I cried out, shuddering violently as I came inside Riley’s mouth.
It felt like I died, in the best way.
“Holy,” I panted. “Fucking. Shit.”
I stared at Riley, who had removed his finger but still had my cum pooling on his tongue. I sat up frantically.
“You don't have to – ”
He swallowed.
“…Swallow.”
He paused, as if considering the taste, then smirked. “Too late.”
I flopped back, moaning with how overwhelmed I was. There were aftershocks of my orgasm still coursing through my body.
“You killed me,” I muttered. “I’m dead.”
Riley laughed and half-laid on the bale next to me, kissing my cheek. “Sorry. It was fun while it lasted.”
“Damn right it was.”
He kissed me again, playfully nipping at my lips. “Good thing you’re not actually dead so I can do that to you again.”
I shivered. “Don’t say shit like that, I’m serious. If I cum any more I might seriously dehydrate and shrivel up.”
He kissed the corner of my mouth. “I don’t think that’s a thing that happens.”
I chuckled. “Wanna find out?”
Chapter Nineteen
After another lazy half-round, we finally decided to stop fooling around in the barn before we got hay up our asses. Which you really don’t want to happen, trust me.
I pulled up my pants with a grunt as Riley was putting the hay gloves back on.
“Sorry about, uh.” He gestured to the gloves.
“Don’t sweat it,” I said. “They were old as hell anyway.”
I picked up the can of cat food that I’d tossed haphazardly to the side and hauled myself up the next platform of hay bales.
“I hope she didn’t run off with all the noise we made,” Riley said.
“We weren’t that loud,” I said.
“We weren’t,” Riley stated. “But you certainly were.”
I blushed fiercely. “Shut up. Not my fault you gave me the best orgasm of my life, asshole.”
Riley was grinning smugly but blushing as well. Served him right.
“How are we going to find her in all this hay? This place is huge,” he said.
“Probably in the back corner.” I gestured to the far wall, where the bales had made sort of a natural cove. We climbed up together, and I had to stifle a laugh a few times as Riley sneezed at the dust and made funny faces.
Finally we reached the back wall.
“Where are you, girl?” I called softly. I opened the tin, letting the powerful scent of meat waft towards her.
A pair of reflective green discs shone at me in the darkness. I kneeled down, shuffling forward slowly. “There you are. Here you go.”
I held out the tin, showing her, then putting it on the ground. To my surprise, she slipped out of her hiding place, tail high with confidence, and began eating out of the tin without even batting an eye at us.
“Wow,” I said. “She’s really trusting.”
“Yeah,” Riley murmured, kneeling beside me. “That just upsets me more. She was obviously someone’s pet. How could they just dump her like that?”
I shook my head. I reached for his hand and squeezed it gently. “Not everyone’s as caring as you.”
He sighed and squeezed my hand back.
“Don’t worry,” I said. “She’ll always have a place to stay here, so don’t cry, okay?”
“I’m not crying,” he mumbled.
I kissed his cheek. “I can’t believe what a sweet guy you are.”
He groaned. “Cut it out.”
“I’m serious! Look at you. Your heart’s bursting over this little cat. It’s so cute.”
“You’re cute,” he muttered. He quickly reached over and bit me playfully on the neck.
“Hey!” I stammered. “Not in front of the cat.”
He smirked. “Then we better get back to your room.”
“Rowdy boy,” I said. “Look at you, with your big gay sex awakening.”
He chuckled. I stood up and brushed myself off.
“Can you stay here with her for a minute? I’m gonna go fill up a water bowl for her,” I said.
“Sure thing.”
I hopped over the bales back to the ramp, then headed for the tack room. I found a spare stainless steel bowl, rinsed it and filled it with water. As the old faucet ran, I leaned on the edge of the deep plastic sink, suddenly engulfed in memories. I remembered using this sink – having to stand on a stepping stool – and washing Bucky’s old grooming equipment.
Suddenly putting the bowl down, I trudged to the old bucket where all of the brushes, picks and combs were still stowed away. I picked up the rubber curry comb, running my fingers over the stiff plastic bristles. I could almost smell the phantom scent of her fur as I brushed the dust out of it.
I stared at the comb, then put it
in my pocket. I grabbed the water bowl and carefully headed back up the ramp.
“I’m back,” I said. Riley had his finger outstretched to the cat, who was rubbing her face on it. “Hey, she likes you!”
Riley smiled like a little kid – a real genuine smile that made my heart light up. I stroked his back and drew little shapes on it while the cat kept smearing her face on his hand.
“I guess you ended up getting a cat after all,” I said.
He looked at me in surprise. “She’s not really my cat, though.”
I shrugged. “Why not? You’re my boyfriend. It’s my barn. Hell, she’s your cat now.” I laughed. “Now its your responsibility to feed her and stuff.”
His eyes widened. “Are you being serious?”
“Of course I am.” I kissed his cheek.
“Thank you,” he murmured.
“Don’t worry about it, you big goof.” I pat him on the shoulder. “God, you’re so cute. Look at you and your cat feelings.”
He groaned playfully. “Nooo, I don’t have cat feelings.”
“You totally do. My boyfriend’s a cat-person. I’m gonna tell everyone.”
“Ugh.”
After he was done feeding and petting his new – and first ever – pet, we decided to get back to the house.
“What’s that in your pocket?” Riley asked on the way down the ramp.
“Huh?” His eyes were on the curry comb. “Oh, um. It’s nothing.”
His brow scrunched up in concern. “Aaron, what’s wrong? Don’t say it’s nothing when I can tell you’re upset.”
I sighed and averted my eyes, fingering the comb absentmindedly. “It’s not important, it’s just… I found Bucky’s old grooming stuff in the tack closet.”
“Oh,” Riley said softly. “Aaron…”
“It’s okay,” I mumbled, but he came towards me with his arms outstretched, and without thinking I let myself fall onto his chest. Before I knew it my eyes were stinging with tears and my sinuses painfully clogged up. I grasped Riley’s shirt, hiding my face in it as my tears began to soak it. I had to grit my teeth to keep from sobbing.
“You’re okay,” he said, stroking my back in slow soothing motions.
I couldn’t hold back any longer. The floodgates broke and it all came bursting out, all the sadness and grief and loss from my childhood, pouring out in ugly tears against Riley’s chest. He gripped me tighter, caressing me gently as I cried like a baby on him.
Finally the tears stopped, although unfortunately the snot kept running. I pulled away and was about to wipe my nose on my sleeve when Riley promptly took a napkin out of his pocket and handed it to me.
“Thanks.” My voice sounded awful, like I had a cold. I felt decidedly unsexy right now, covered in tears and mucous and hay dust. “Do you still love me even though I’m ugly?”
Riley chuckled and held me again, kissing the top of my head. “Always. Even if you were butt-ugly, which you aren’t.”
“Even right now?”
“Even right now.”
I sniffled and blew my nose, being extra loud on purpose. “How about now?”
“Hmm,” he said. “Nope. Still hot.”
I laughed. “Liar.”
His face went dead serious all of a sudden. “Aaron, you are the hottest man in the world and I don’t want to hear another word otherwise.”
He was being so stoic that I couldn’t help but laugh. “Fine. Except for you.”
He rolled his eyes. “Deal.”
“Wow, I can’t believe we’re the two hottest guys in the world.”
He smirked. “Me neither.”
After my tears were thoroughly dried and Riley reassured me I didn’t look like I’d been crying for ten minutes, we headed back to the house.
Molly was sprawled across one couch watching TV, and my parents were on the other couch.
“You two sure did take a long time,” Mom called.
I searched for Molly’s gaze, praying she didn’t say anything to her even though I know she wouldn’t have. Molly shook her head very slightly, just enough for me to notice.
“Yeah, we got caught up playing with the cat,” I said.
“Oh, you found her?” Dad asked. “How’s she doin’?”
“She’s great. Actually, Riley decided he wants to adopt her,” I said with a laugh.
Riley stammered. “I – I mean, not officially, my parents wouldn’t let me keep a cat in the house, but – ”
Dad didn’t bother waiting for him to finish. “Sure, she’s all yours! Saves me the hassle of goin’ all the way to the barn to feed her while you’re here, anyway.”
Molly sat up so Riley and I could take a seat on the couch next to her. I wondered if they would notice – or care – how close Riley and I were sitting together. Part of me wanted to leap up and declare that I was proudly gay with my new gay boyfriend, and the other part wanted to curl up and shrivel away even at the thought of coming out.
I wondered if Riley was as nervous as I was. I glanced at him from the corner of my eye and he smiled. It wasn’t like I could ask for his input right now in the middle of everyone. I sighed.
“So, how goes school?” Mom asked during a commercial.
“It’s okay.” I paused. “It’s good.”
“Good.”
“How are your professors?” Dad asked.
“They’re alright, nothing to write home about, I guess,” I said. “We do have one cool prof, though.”
“Whose ‘we’?” Dad said.
“Oh – me and Riley. He’s my roommate, I don't know if I told you guys that already.” The words felt hot as they came out of my mouth, like I was lying, except I wasn’t. I just wasn’t telling the whole truth.
“No, I didn’t know that,” Mom said. “Hope Aaron isn’t making a mess of the room. If so, you have my permission to smack him with a broom.”
Molly and I laughed but Riley started blushing. “No, he’s quite clean, actually. I’m messier than he is.”
“Is that right?” she said. “Well, then Aaron has permission to hit your butt with a broom.”
He turned even redder and I prayed nobody noticed.
But Mom went on. “Oh, that reminds me. Can you give me your parents’ number, hon? I’ll give them a call before it gets too late. Don’t want them fretting over you.”
“Sure thing.”
Riley got up to give her a hand with the number. I let out a breath I didn’t realize I was holding when they left the room.
“Nice kid,” Dad said.
I fidgeted with the hem of my shirt. It was still dusty from the barn. “Yeah.”
“What’s he taking?” he asked, not peeling his eyes off the TV.
“Engineering,” I replied.
“Really?” he said. “Impressive. Must be smart.”
My face grew warm but I didn’t know why. “Yeah, he is.”
I felt Molly’s gaze for a second. I think she sensed my dark aura of anxiety and decided to take the heat off of me.
“So, Dad,” she began. “Aaron’s gonna finally be able to work at the ranch with me this summer.”
I perked up at the new topic of conversation.
“Oh, yeah, that’s right,” he said. “Finally, eh? You’ve been waiting forever.”
“Yeah, I have,” I said. “It almost doesn’t feel real. Like, it’s been so long.”
“Really?” he said. “I didn’t know it meant that much to you.”
“Dad, of course it does!” I couldn’t believe what I was hearing. “You know how much I love horses. I’ve been waiting for years to finally – ”
I had to cut myself off before I got upset again. I shut my eyes and took a deep breath. I wished Riley was here with me again, touching my back and soothing me. Molly shot me a sympathetic glance.
But Dad didn’t seem to notice anything was wrong. “To finally what?” he asked, staring at the TV.
“To work with horses again, Dad,” Molly said bluntly.
&nb
sp; “Oh.” He was quiet for a while. I thought he was over the subject until he added in a gentler voice, “I’m sorry about what happened when you were little, kiddo.”
That struck me. I sat there, not knowing what to do or say. I was already all cried out. I finally rasped, “Yeah.”
“Alright,” Mom said loudly as she and Riley came back into the room. “Now that’s all taken care of and Riley’s mum can relax, we can relax, too.”
Riley took his place on the couch next to me. I welcomed his warm presence. I pressed my thigh against his, and our arms brushed together. I would’ve melted into him if I could have. He gave me a soft questioning look, as if asking what was wrong. I only shook my head. I didn’t want to worry him, but I knew it was already too late.
I wanted to hold his hand. It was right there, inches away.
Some awful nagging, pestering feeling mushroomed up inside me. I couldn’t stand it anymore.
I shot up off the couch, grabbing Riley’s wrist and pulling him along with me. Everyone turned to stare. Before they could even ask, I announced loudly, “Mom, Dad, I’m gay. Riley’s not my friend. He’s my boyfriend. And I’m tired of having to hide it.”
Everyone, including Riley, was staring at me. Panic exploded in my chest. I suddenly felt sick. I didn't want to stick around to see the reaction.
Molly caught my eye. She was mouthing car keys.
I understood immediately. I took Riley and stormed to the front door, snatching Molly’s keys to her car.
“Aaron, where are we going?” Riley asked, startled.
“I don’t know. I need air.” I slammed the car door closed as he took the shotgun seat.
“Are you okay to drive? You’re upset,” he said.
“I’m fine.” I exhaled shakily. “I’m fine.”
He didn’t seem convinced, watching me with sympathetic eyes. “Aaron,” he said softly. “Let me drive. I’ll go wherever you tell me to.”
I paused, breathing heavily, then nodded. “Okay.”
We switched places, and Riley turned on the ignition, backed up out of the gravel driveway, and took off down the darkened road.
Chapter Twenty
The black sky rolled on endlessly above us. I focused on the stars as Riley drove, picking out constellations and shapes. Anything to deal with the gut-wrenching anxiety blooming in my stomach.