The Harbinger

by Pat Adams-Wright

  The ice blue eyes held her gaze as Leah shook her head so vigorously, she sent her blonde tresses flailing. The look of panic still hadn’t receded from her face. Ellie was so full of sympathy for the child, but she had to take charge. She was the adult here, although she also felt some mental trauma at witnessing the display of atrocious cruelty.

  Grabbing her mobile from her bag, she looked up the phone number of the library. “What’s your mum’s name, Leah?” asked Ellie, scanning the child to make sure she was holding herself upright with no difficulty.

  “Holly Simons,” she answered, almost in a whisper. “She’s only been there a short time. I hope she doesn’t get in trouble.”

  Ellie shook her head just as the call connected. “Hello? Could I speak to Holly Simons, please?” she asked, trying to avoid the anxiousness in her voice.

  There was silence on the other end for a moment. Ellie could detect the wariness emanating from who she suspected was Holly herself. “Speaking. Who is this?” she asked hesitantly.

  “I don’t know if you remember me. Ellie Hanray? The woman who—”

  “Yes, I remember you. You’re the woman whose book didn’t turn up. I had a word with our supplier and—”

  “I’m sorry to cut you off, but this isn’t about the book.” Ellie looked at Leah, who was beginning to look worse by the minute. Blood had seeped through the tissue and was spreading out like a cruel stain. “It concerns your daughter.”

  “Leah?”

  “Yes, I’m afraid I came across a group of girls attacking her. I think she may have to go to the hospital. She has a cut on her face and probably other damage too, from what I saw of the incident.”

  Holly quickly jumped into the conversation. “Where are you?” she asked hurriedly, concern hanging heavily in her voice.

  Ellie could hear the rustle of papers and the jingling of keys.

  “Near the front entrance of the school on the roadside. I didn’t take her into the school because I think she might be in shock.”

  “I’m on my way. I’ve got my car, so I’ll only be a few minutes.”

  Ellie was a little concerned. This incident must have come as a shock to Holly. She didn’t want it reflected in her driving. “Please drive carefully. I’m with her, so she’s in good hands,” Ellie said with more confidence than she actually felt.

  The line went dead. Holly would take no notice of her last comment, she knew. Leah was her child, and rushing to your child’s side when they are distress is what parents do. Good parents, anyway. What does that make me, she wondered?

  “Your mum’s on her way, Leah. She’ll only be a few minutes.” It was then Ellie noticed the child shivering badly. Ellie didn’t know whether the cold or shock was causing it, but either way, it wasn’t good. She took off her winter coat and placed it around Leah’s shoulders, thankful she had put on the extra cardigan this morning. She pulled the coat’s collar tight to Leah’s neck and fastened a couple of buttons. A few drops of blood dripped onto the collar. Ellie put another tissue on top of the original one and pushed quite firmly.

  “Try to keep some firm pressure on it, sweetheart,” she said, transferring Leah’s hand under her own. Then she briskly rubbed her hands over Leah’s shoulders. Leah flinched at her touch.

  The waiting seemed endless, but then, quite suddenly, in the distance, Ellie heard a screech of car tyres. “I think your mum’s here,” said Ellie, knowing that’s exactly how she would have driven if Alex had been in Leah’s position. A blue Ford Fiesta came into view as the car cornered on two wheels and whizzed up Freemont Avenue towards them. It screeched to a halt in front of them.

  Holly was out of the car without turning off the engine. Her hand moved to her mouth when she saw Leah’s blood. “Oh, my God! Leah, are you all right, sweetie? Look at me! Talk to your mum, sweetheart.”

  “Mum,” said Leah, “I feel a little wobbly.”

  Holly grabbed her to support her weight.

  Ellie looked at Leah. She had turned the colour of milk. “Look, you take her in the back and keep her awake. I’ll drive,” she said to Holly, who seemed to sense the immediacy of the situation when she saw the look on Ellie’s face.

  Ellie jumped in the car, adjusted the seat and mirrors before driving, while Holly saw Leah into the rear seat. Holly pulled the seatbelt across Leah so she could keep hold of the temporary dressing. Ellie got another tissue from the bag and passed it over to Holly when she saw the seepage from the wound.

  “That should be enough until we get to the hospital.” Ellie looked at Holly, engaging her big green eyes. “We’ll be there in no time. Traffic will be light.”

  Ellie hoped she had spoken the truth.

  3

  Ellie handed Holly another cup of vapid coffee from the hospital’s vending machine. She took it automatically while still staring trance-like at the opposite wall. They were in the Relative’s Waiting Room, just opposite the minor injuries operating theatre. The room was airless and gloomy, having no natural light and only a flickering strip light. The medical profession knew how to give advice freely and repeatedly, yet they left a defective strip light in a waiting room. She hoped nobody with epilepsy had to spend any time in there.

  Ellie looked at Holly, her facial features… softening. “She’ll be okay,” said Ellie, knowing the hackneyed remark would probably be unwelcome, but she was at a loss as to what else to say. She reached across and squeezed Holly’s forearm, hoping the touch of another person would give her some comfort. Ellie’s hand began to tingle.

  Holly turned towards her and offered a hesitant smile. She lowered her head into her cupped hands and let out a wracked sob. Ellie rubbed her back, knowing from experience emotion was better out than bottled up. The retention is what would cause the lasting damage—not the sobbing.

  As Ellie put her free arm around Holly’s shoulders and pulled her in for a hug, the door flew open with great force. Holly’s face lifted, and she was quickly on her feet, spilling coffee in her haste to put it on the floor, and then running into the man’s arms. He was the perfect description of tall, dark, and handsome. Even with his chiselled features distorted with worry, he remained handsome. The redolence he brought with him was one of expensive masculine fragrance. Ellie appreciated the relief from the medicinal smell of the hospital.

  “How is she? Can I see her?” His body language suggested he was full of worry from head to toe, stiff as a board with hands clenched into tight fists, knuckles white. He was obviously Leah’s dad. His fists unfurled as he pushed Holly away from his embrace, holding her firmly by the shoulders as he waited for an answer.

  “She’s in surgery,” she informed him with a dithery voice. “The plastic surgeon said he doesn’t know if there will be a scar until he’s had a good look. He seemed a little worried that the wound is jagged.” Holly looked up into his eyes as though waiting for a comment. There wasn’t one. “We can see her when she’s out of surgery. Until then, we have to wait.” Holly let out another sob and returned to her seat, dabbing her face repeatedly with a tissue.

  As he turned to follow Holly, he looked at Ellie for the first time. “Are you the lady I have to thank for looking after my daughter?” he asked in a low voice. He sounded as though his sails had lost their wind

  “Yes, I am Ellie Hanray. Pleased to meet you. I’m just sorry the circumstances are what they are.” Ellie stood and offered her hand, which he took a little hesitantly, transferring the moisture from his palm to Ellie’s dry one. She wiped her hand surreptitiously down the side of her coat.

  He pointed to the blood on the front and collar of Ellie’s coat. “Your coat will need dry cleaning. Please, send me the bill. It’s the least I can do.”

  His words were kind, but Ellie thought she detected something in the background. As though he was saying what he believed he should rather than what he actually felt. She shook her head.

  “Not necessary, but thanks for the offer. I’m just glad I was there to help. Actually, if you’r
e going to stay with Holly, I’ll go home. I don’t want to intrude.”

  Holly spoke in answer as she retook her seat. “Ellie, I can’t thank you enough. Phil will stay now. Please, let me get you a taxi for your trouble.”

  “Truly, Holly, it’s been no trouble. You save everything you have for your little girl. Give her a hug from me, and I’ll no doubt see you at work. Nice meeting you, Phil.”

  He looked shocked at her comment. “Er, yes, thank you. Nice meeting you, too.”

  Holly rose from her seat to give Ellie a kiss on the cheek. Ellie could still feel it when she got home.

  Ellie sat at home, a mug of tea in hand, feet up on the pouffe, and laptop balanced precariously on her lap. She’d looked at the same set of figures four times, and she still hadn’t worked out the cost of materials for the job in hand. Not that it would be her problem. The woman had decided to get the work done herself, but Ellie liked to include an estimate, just in case there was a change of heart and her services might be required at a later date. Concentrate, she screamed at herself in her head, but it was no good. It had gone. Her thoughts were alternating between imagining Leah in a hospital bed and her mum kissing Ellie on the cheek. She lifted her hands to touch the spot on the side of her face and closed her eyes in reflection.

  Ellie could feel the hot moisture of the touch and the incredible softness of Holly’s lips against her skin. She gasped at the thought of those lips touching her own, of them kissing her breasts, and then kissing…

  For goodness’ sake, Ellie! “What the hell are you thinking,” she said aloud to herself. “They are a happy family. Let it go.”

  She remembered when Phil arrived and questioned a few things she’d seen. Although concerned about his daughter, he hadn’t been overly bothered about Holly. Yes, he’d returned her hug, but only briefly. However, there didn’t seem to be any fondness there. Perhaps he was shy and didn’t show his feelings in public. Ellie imagined herself in the same situation, she would have held Holly close for a long time. She would have buried her hands in those blonde curls and whispered words of consolation and positivity. Stroked her back and planted loving kisses on the side of her head for comfort. Phil had done nothing of the kind. A quick hug and that was it. Perhaps they were going through a rough time. Whatever it was, Ellie would bet it wasn’t temporary. She had lost her son. He was dead forever. Did it really matter what their marital status was? No, it didn’t. Not my circus… she thought.

  Ellie took her cup to the kitchen, pondering on tonight’s dinner. She knew forcing yourself to eat wasn’t a good thing, but she must. She looked at herself in the reflection of the kitchen window. Her shoulder length burnished gold hair had remained unscathed in the drama. She couldn’t see blood anywhere on her face, although she was surprised to see how drawn and haunted her features looked.

  There was no doubt she had lost vast amounts of weight since her loss of Alex. Today, she had forgone lunch so she could treat herself to one of Sue’s cakes but missed that too. She hadn’t had a bite to eat since her one slice of toast at breakfast, yet here she was, forcing herself to look at food. She stared herself in the eye. Gone was the harrowed look they’d carried for so long. As far as she could make out, her eyes had sunk a little, with dark circles beneath them. She vowed to get more sleep. Her mother hadn’t been pleased when Ellie cancelled on her, either. Yet another battle coming up.

  Before she could amble her way to the refrigerator, she saw something sweep past her window, which made her blink with bewilderment. Bats at dusk, but it was pitch black outside, not to mention cold, so she was certain it wasn’t one of those. She had never seen a bird at night, although she knew some owls were given to it. Again, she’d never seen them around her house.

  As she was mentally ticking things off the list of possibilities of what it could be, her eyes still scanning the window, a robin landed on her windowsill. She blinked in astonishment. No, she thought to herself… it can’t be! She pushed her face towards the window to get a better look as the bird’s head bobbed and pushed forward, looking straight at her. It was then she noticed the tiny black mark on the edge of its red breast. How the heck?

  She reached out her hand and grabbed the biscuit tin, taking out a rich shortbread petty-coat tail and breaking the fan-shape into small pieces as she went to the door. She opened it and was greeted with a blast of frigid air. She scurried around the side of the house, hoping her slippers would cope in the ice, fully expecting the bird to have flown, but it was still there, following her every move. She reached out and placed the pile of crumbs beside it. It made no effort to fly, but kept its gaze on her, enveloping her in its stare.

  “I’m sorry I can’t stay long. It’s absolutely freezing out here,” she said, pulling her trusty cardigan close to her body. Her teeth were already chattering. She shook her head in disbelief. “I don’t know how any bird survives in this weather. How did you find me? Have you been following, and I never noticed? You should have made yourself known. I’m clueless most of the time these days. Since I lost my son…”

  She pulled around her heavy cardigan again, this time tighter, enveloping her torso as much as possible, pulling her arms snugly around herself to keep it in place, hoping to keep her dwindling body heat in.

  The bird walked forward, as though to offer some comfort, its beady eyes keen and alert. There was brief eye-to-eye contact at which time Ellie could have sworn she heard the voice of her son as clear as day.

  “Everything will be all right, mummy,” it said.

  Ellie moved her hands to her open mouth. Surely, she imagined things. She felt awkward and embarrassed. “I’m sorry. I have to go,” she said through her chattering teeth.

  As she walked back to the kitchen, Ellie berated herself. “Thinking nonsense like that will get you confined to a padded cell. Don’t you dare repeat your thought to another soul,” she said aloud.

  Could it be Alex? Could the bird be him in another guise, wanting to communicate some comfort to her?

  She convinced herself she was trying to find ways to reject the feelings of guilt that washed over her by such fanciful thinking.

  Ellie tried to settle in front of the TV with her cheese on toast and a cup of tea. Surprisingly, she felt buoyed after her encounter with the bird. It was the first time she’d really enjoyed her food since Alex had died, the taste of the strong tangy cheddar lingering on her tongue. She ate Sue’s cakes on a regular basis, and although they were extremely good, Ellie didn’t derive much pleasure from them. Not like the meal she’d just eaten. She was tempted to go make herself another couple of slices. Perhaps my appetite’s on its way back, she thought to herself. Mum will be pleased.

  Ellie’s mum cancelled their next meet-up due to an unexpected offered hospital cancellation spot.

  “I hope you don’t mind, darling,” she said in a telephone call. “I didn’t want to put it off any longer. I fear old age is creeping up on me quicker than expected.”

  Ellie laughed. “Mum, fifty-eight is not old. If you wore the high heels a little less, it would ease pressure on your back, I’m sure. I honestly don’t know why you feel the need to dress to the nines all the time.”

  Her mother retorted in a sharp voice, “Because you never know who you might meet or when. How you can wear those horrible jogging things is beyond me. What would you do if you met the love of your life while wearing those things?”

  “She would only be the love of my life if those things didn’t matter.” Ellie breathed a sigh of relief, thanking her lucky stars her mother had cancelled. She couldn’t cope when her mother wouldn’t see sense.

  “Yes, well, I better be off. I need to do some shopping. I’ll ring you later.”

  Ellie rolled her eyes. “Yes, of course.”

  Therefore, Ellie found herself wandering to the library, knowing she would be able to have a cup of coffee and a piece of cake in peace. Not having to rack her brains for a topic that would interest her mother was a godsend. She never kne
w how much hard work her mum was, except on the odd occasions when she wasn’t there. Guilt overtook her when she wondered if she was neglecting her mother. Outdoor pursuits only interested her dad these days, what with his garden and allotment, and he’d never been one for talking much, anyway. He was often out for hours on end, leaving her mum to do what she favoured, which didn’t leave an awful lot time in the house together. Perhaps she ought to make more of an effort on her dad’s behalf. Spending more time in her mum’s company didn’t enthral Ellie, but she would do it for her dad.

  The library’s warm hug was waiting for her as soon as she walked in. The smell of the books and the chatter of the visiting townsfolk welcomed her warmly. Just as she was passing the reception desk on the way to Sue’s Place, a voice called from behind her.

  “Are you ignoring me or do you want to know about your book?”

  Ellie could hear the smile in the words. She didn’t need to see the large green eyes under the mop of blonde hair to know it was Holly.

  Ellie spun around so quickly, she almost lost her balance. “I’m sorry,” she said in a ragged breath that surprised her. “It never crossed my mind you’d be working—at least not for a while.”

  Holly looked as though she was searching for the right thing to say. Her brows gravitated towards each other as she lowered them. “Yes, well, to be honest, Leah and I are driving each other crazy. There are only so many times you can play Monopoly, Cluedo, and other board games before the action becomes meaningless. I gave in and allowed her to play on her tablet, but even that has lost its shine when she can’t talk to her friends during school hours. Hence, her dad has taken a few hours off to keep her company.”

  Ellie nodded, remembering how she felt during periods of illness at that age. Friends and what they have to say is the be-all end-all.