Quiz Queens

by K. L. Denman

  At first glance, Liam appears to be working on the assignment. However, closer study reveals this may not be the case. He’s holding his pen in his left hand, but he isn’t writing with it. No, he’s doing some sort of exercise. The muscles in his arm are twitching. Okay, they are not exactly twitching. The correct word would be flexing. This is interesting. I pick up my pen and clench it. The muscles in my forearm move—a tiny bit. Not nearly enough for anyone else to notice. There’s something fascinating about Liam’s rippling muscles. It’s as if they have an independent life. That’s a foolish thought. I look past Liam to see if other nearby males have this ability. I notice the new kid, Javier. He’s hunched over his papers and is mostly invisible. His wild, curly hair hides most of his face, and his plaid shirt covers his arms. The only muscle movement I can see is his hand, working the pen. Very ordinary.

  Back to Liam. He’s amped things up. He’s crumpled his work sheet into a ball and laid his forearm on his desktop, his hand palm up. He squeezes the paper ball, and his bicep muscles bulge. The underarm seam on his black T-shirt is ripped open. Is this why muscled people are said to be “ripped”? I suddenly have a strange impulse to reach out and stroke his arm. Why would I think that?

  And then Liam looks straight at me and grins. Like he knows I wanted to touch him. My face flames, and I turn away—fast. I think I hear him chuckle. I also think that grin reminds me of someone. Who? And then I know. Sherry’s losers. They all have that grin.

  I want to tell Kiara I’ve changed my mind. Guys are way too dangerous. But she practically dances the whole way home from school and doesn’t shut up long enough for me to say a word.

  I decide I’ll tell her when we’re back in her room. After she hands me a bag of my favorite pecan cookies, I can’t do it. “I asked Mom to make them especially for you,” she says.

  “Kiara…”

  “No, no, Jane. You deserve them. Don’t worry—she made lots. Plenty for everyone.”

  “That’s good.” My smile is weak. “I wouldn’t want another raid from the twins.” Kiara has seven-year-old twin brothers. They’re terrors, and I love them like they are my own brothers.

  “Okay!” Kiara claps her hands. “Let’s do this.”

  I stop myself from rolling my eyes and settle for a sigh. “Are you sure about this?”

  “Totally. Why?”

  “No reason.” It occurs to me that it’s one thing to make a list of questions. But in typical Kiara style, her plan is incomplete. She hasn’t thought about how she’ll get Omar and Liam to participate. This scheme is doomed, so there is no need for me to talk her out of it. “What have you got so far?”

  “Um…I told you already. Favorite color and lucky number.”

  “Huh. Okay.” I reach into my pack and pull out a pen and paper. “Why are those questions important?”

  She looks at me with something like pity. “Isn’t it obvious? If I know his favorite color, I can wear it. And if I know his lucky number, I can pick that date to make my move.”

  “Your move?”

  She giggles. “You know. Like, if his lucky number is five? Then on the fifth of next month, I’ll…flirt with him.”

  I raise my brows. “Seriously? Do you even know how to flirt?”

  “For sure. I’ve watched some online tutorials. It’s easy. You have to make eye contact and have the right posture.” She must see something in my face because she adds, “I mean, body language. Like, don’t cross your arms.”

  “Omigod,” I mutter under my breath. “It’s worse than I thought.”

  “What?”

  “Nothing. What if his lucky number is something like forty-three?”

  “It won’t be. Jeez, Jane. Who would have that?”

  I shrug. “I don’t know. It’s possible.”

  “Well, if he’s that weird I won’t be interested. Can we just start making more questions?”

  I pick up my pen. “How about this one? If you ever become famous, what would you like to be famous for?”

  She tips her head to one side and considers. “Yeah. I like it.”

  I scribble down the question. “All right. Here’s another one. Have you ever cheated on anything or anyone?”

  “Hmm. Why would I ask that?”

  “Because it’s important. Remember Sherry’s boyfriends? Numbers two, four and seven?”

  Her eyes widen. “Right. She was really hurt. So yeah. We’ll include it. And maybe we should have a question about honesty too. Like, How important is honesty in a relationship?”

  “Good one.” I jot down both questions. “I think we could use the one you liked from the questionnaire. Something to do with your perfect day?”

  “Yeah. Describe your perfect day. Then maybe another easy one like, What is your favorite movie?”

  “That’s a little too easy. How about which is more important, beauty or brains? And why?”

  “Nice.” Kiara nods.

  My pen moves again. “Okay, we’ve got seven so far. If we get three more, we’ll have ten. That should be enough.”

  A few minutes pass while we ponder. Kiara comes up with, “What is your favorite plant?”

  I look at her. “Um…why?”

  She shrugs. “I don’t know. I’m running out of ideas.”

  “I believe you. How about asking if they like kids? That tells you something about a person.”

  “True.” She nods. “But the kid one is risky. They might think it means I’m crazy. Like I’m already looking to get married. Or even that I’m pregnant and…” She stops and bites her lip. “Sorry, Jane. I wasn’t thinking.”

  “No worries. You have a point. Don’t want to scare them off with a kid.” I take off my glasses to clean them while I think. “Maybe the question could be do you like pets? Or, What’s your favorite animal?”

  “Yeah!” She nods vigorously. “Favorite animal. Good one.”

  I write it down. “Two more. Ah! How about asking, What superpower would you like to have?”

  “Oooh. Yes!”

  “One more. And I think I’ve got a good one. What are your plans for the future?”

  Kiara frowns. “I don’t know. That’s a boring question.”

  I point my pen at her. “But it’s important.”

  She rolls her eyes. “When you’re fourteen?”

  “Especially when you’re fourteen.” I add the question to our list. “There. That’s ten. We’re done. Do you want me to type it up on the computer?”

  “That would be great. And then…” She hesitates. This is when her plan fizzles and dies.

  “And then?” I prompt. I could be smirking.

  Gleefully she hugs me. “I’ve got it all figured out, Jane. You won’t believe it.”

  Chapter Four

  Kiara is right. I don’t believe she’s got this figured out. I take a pecan cookie from the bag and lean back in my chair. “Okay. So tell me.”

  She moves to sit cross-legged on her bed and composes herself. She presses her hands together under her chin like she’s praying.

  “You’re going to do yoga?” I ask.

  She laughs. “No.” But she takes a deep yoga-type breath before giving me a sideways look. “You might not like it.”

  “Why not?”

  “Because it’s sort of tricky. Like the coyote.”

  I have a bad feeling about this. “Just tell me already.”

  “Okay. So what I want to do is make two copies of the quiz. One for Omar and one for Liam. Then we’ll put them in an envelope with a letter that says this is a chance to earn extra marks. For Career and Personal Planning.”

  “I don’t get it.”

  “Wait. There’s more.” Her eyes are huge. “Then we’ll sneak the envelopes onto their desks.”

  “Ummm…”

  Kiara holds up a hand. “And obviously, we don’t want them to give these back to Ms. Kalkat.”

  “Obviously.”

  “So the letter will instruct them each to hand in the completed
quiz at the office. To Mrs. Peebles.”

  Mrs. Peebles is the ancient office secretary. She’s often confused. Sometimes she forgets to turn off the school PA system, and we hear her singing. It’s always the same song. “Old MacDonald had a farm. E-I-E-I-O…” Personally, I think she’s trying to tell us something.

  “And how do you get the quizzes back from Mrs. Peebles?” I ask. I’m pretending to go along with this plan. But the more I hear, the more I hate it.

  “Glad you asked. Mrs. Peebles likes you, Jane.”

  It’s true. I was in the office one time when she broke into song. I sang along with her. “So?”

  “So I was thinking. You could go to her. Tell her you’re doing an extra project. She’ll believe it because you’re an overachiever. You could tell her it’s an anonymous survey to see how many people will complete an anonymous survey.”

  I glare at Kiara. “You want me to lie to Mrs. Peebles?”

  She rolls her eyes. “It won’t hurt her or anything. All you have to do is go back later and ask her for them. And, voilà!” She watches me eagerly. Like she thinks I’m going to be impressed.

  I take a bite of my cookie and try to decide where to start. “So. Let me get this straight. You want to trick the guys into doing the quiz. Then you want me to trick Mrs. P. And nowhere in this so-called plan do I see you doing the quiz. With them.”

  Her nose wrinkles. “I can’t do that.”

  “Wasn’t that the whole point? You do the quiz with them. So you get to know each other?”

  She waves her hands. “No, no, no! That’s only for that professional thing you have. For Sherry. There’s no way I can get up the nerve to ask them. But I want to see what they’re like.”

  I pick up the list of questions we wrote. I feel like tearing it up. One question in particular stands out. I read it aloud. “How important is honesty in a relationship?”

  Kiara blinks. “What?”

  “This question. You wanted it on the list. So I’m asking you. How would you answer that one, Kiara?”

  She turns pink. “Jane. It’s only a quiz. I’m not hurting anyone.”

  “But you obviously expect them to think honesty is important. And me too. And you’re asking me to lie for you? You know I won’t do that.” It’s true. With Sherry, I’ve seen how much damage lies can cause.

  She looks away. Her chin is trembling. “Jane, come on. You’re taking this too seriously. And how often do I ask you for a favor? Hardly ever.”

  “No?” I scoff. “You asked me to help you with this quiz.”

  Her chin goes up. “Yeah. And you said you would. Now you want to go back on your word?”

  I open my mouth to tell her that was before I found out I had to lie. But I snap my mouth shut as I get an idea. A coyote idea. One that might fix this whole thing. My idea would mean no boyfriend troubles for Kiara. And it would teach her a lesson about honesty. It’s about time I stood up for myself.

  I fold the sheet of questions and slide it into my pack. “Fine. I’ll help you. I’ll take this home and get it ready tonight.”

  She squeals and leaps off the bed. “Yes! Thank you!” She wraps me in a hug. “Omigod, this is sooo exciting.” She bounces up and down. “You’re the best bestie ever, Jane.”

  I have to agree. Friends don’t let friends be fools.

  Chapter Five

  When I get home, Sherry is much better. She’s wearing clothes and is actively playing her video game. She’s not up to asking about my day. That is just as well. I would have to tell her it sucked.

  After our gourmet meal of salad and grilled cheese sandwiches, I get Sherry to promise she’ll go back to work tomorrow. Then I get to work. This is the letter I write to go with the quiz:

  Dear Student,

  Enclosed is a quiz. You are receiving this optional work to provide you with an opportunity to earn extra marks. Return your completed quiz, sealed in this envelope, to Mrs. Peebles, the office secretary.

  Do not write your name on your quiz. Due to the nature of the questions, your identity is protected. Each quiz is numbered. Your number has been recorded. If your quiz is returned, the number on it will be matched to your name for credit, but answers will be kept anonymous.

  Good luck.

  The Career and Personal Planning Team

  I couldn’t bring myself to forge Ms. Kalkat’s name. But I’m okay with saying I’m part of “The Career and Personal Planning Team.” Kiara might be my only student, but I am helping her with personal planning.

  Next, I type up the quiz questions. I make nice blank lines for the answers. It looks good. Professional. Too easy? Hmm. I toy with the idea of adding more questions. If the school was getting us to answer an anonymous questionnaire, it wouldn’t be like this one. It would have questions about drugs, alcohol, home life and sex. We’re asked to do those sometimes, so they know how many of us are “at risk.”

  But the offer of extra marks should be enough to motivate the guys. I’m pretty sure they need all the help they can get. I have to give Kiara credit for that idea. Then I print out three copies of the quiz. I carefully pencil a random number on the upper right-hand corner of each: 17, 22, 5. I print three copies of the letter and put one and a quiz into each envelope.

  I double-check the rotating class schedule. Career and Personal Planning is first period tomorrow. I take a shower, do my homework, then go to check on Sherry.

  “I’ll get up early with you tomorrow,” I tell her.

  “You don’t have to,” she says. “I’ll be fine.”

  “I need to get to school early anyway.”

  “Suit yourself.” She yawns. Then she looks at me. “But thanks, Jane.”

  She can be all right sometimes.

  The last thing I do before bed is check my phone. I kept it off all evening. There are ten missed calls, all from Kiara. And about ten more text messages. I send a reply. Hey. No worries. The quiz is ready. I’m going to bed early. Have to make sure Sherry gets up for work. See you at school!

  Then I turn my phone off again. And I leave it off the next morning. As promised, I make sure Sherry gets up and out the door for work. Then I gather up the envelopes and my books and head for school.

  Mrs. Peebles is pleased to see me. “Jane, dear. You’re here early. Is everything okay?”

  “Just fine, Mrs. P. I came to ask a favor.”

  “If I can do it,” she says, beaming, “I will.”

  I feel terrible about lying to her. I choose my words carefully so they’re not totally dishonest. I show her one of the envelopes. “I’m going to be handing these out to some students. It’s for an extracurricular project. But it’s anonymous. So I’m hoping the students will return them to you. And then I’ll stop by later to pick them up.”

  “Ah.” She nods. “I’ll bet you’re too shy to let them see how smart you are. Tsk-tsk. I hope you get past that one day, Jane. Do you remember what Dolly Parton said?”

  “Um…no.” I’ve heard the name Dolly Parton, but I have no idea who this is.

  “She said, Find out who you are and do it on purpose. Isn’t that great advice?”

  “Yes.” I nod earnestly. “That’s really good.” It actually is. I’d like to think I’m following it right now. “So.” I waggle the envelope. “Is this okay with you?”

  “Absolutely, dear.”

  “Thanks, Mrs. P. See you later.”

  She waves me off, and I head for Career and Personal Planning. As I hoped, no one else is there yet. I set my pack on my desk and prepare to distribute the envelopes.

  Then Ms. Kalkat walks in. “Jane. You’re here early.”

  Does everyone have to state the obvious? “Yes.”

  “Is everything all right?”

  And everyone has to ask me that? “All good,” I reply.

  “Excellent. Then I wonder if I might ask you a favor?” She’s holding a stack of paper. “Would you mind putting these out on everyone’s desk for me?”

  My grin feels huge. �
��No problem, Ms. Kalkat. I’d be happy to.”

  “Thank you. I forgot something in the staff room. I’ll be right back.”

  “Okay.” I take the stack of paper, our assignment for today. I work fast, laying one on each desk. When I reach Omar’s and Liam’s desks, it’s easy to slide their envelopes under the assignment. But who should get the third quiz? I haven’t decided, but it doesn’t really matter. Javier? Why not? I don’t bother to check which number they get. That won’t matter either.

  Chapter Six

  I’m laying the last assignment paper on the last desk when someone hisses, “Jane!” I spin to find Kiara advancing on me. “What are you doing?”

  I smile. “What does it look like? Ms. Kalkat asked me to hand these out.”

  Still whispering, she asks, “What about the quizzes?”

  My smile widens. “All done.” I gesture toward the assignment papers. “Perfect cover, eh?”

  She brings a hand to her mouth. “No way. Are you kidding me?” She wraps me in a hug. “How did you manage that?”

  “I didn’t have to do anything. Ms. Kalkat just showed up and”—I shrug—“it happened.”

  “Wow. It’s like an omen.”

  “What?”

  Her eyes are huge. “An omen. That this is the right thing to do. I mean, to have it work out so easily—it’s practically a miracle.”

  “A miracle? I don’t know if I’d go that far.”

  She grips my arm. “Maybe not. But it’s definitely a good sign.” She tugs me toward Omar’s and Liam’s desks. Her eyes fixate on their assignment papers. “So.” She points. “The envelopes are there?”

  I nod.

  “Ooooh.” She bounces a bit. “What about the letter?”

  “The letter?”

  “I want to see the letter you wrote.”

  “Um…” I stall. “I don’t have an extra copy with me.”

  “But I want to see it!” She eyes the paper on Omar’s desk. The edge of the envelope tucked underneath is visible. There is no way I want her to see that letter. Kiara makes a move toward Omar’s desk, and I block the way.