by Vi Keeland
As I headed toward the door, Garrett said more calmly, “Yeah, you definitely do not want to keep those two waiting, I know how they can be.”
He smirked, and my heart flipped.
“I’ll see you later,” I replied quietly.
As I headed back towards the building, I heard him say, with his voice cracking, “Leila.”
I turned my head to look at him. My heart was breaking as I saw sadness in his eyes.
“It was good to see you.”
I nodded my head and said, “It was good to see you too.” It came out in a whisper, and I was on the verge of tears.
Chapter Four
As I rushed through the lobby, trying to contain my emotions, I nearly took the bathroom door off its hinges as I opened it. Holy Fucking Shit! I screamed in my head. I immediately ran into the handicapped stall and started pacing back and forth in a complete panic. I tried to keep my tears from running down my face. The last thing I needed was to look all red and blotchy.
How could this be happening? Not only was I stuck at a wedding with a bunch of bitches, but Garrett, the love of my life, who smashed my heart into a million little pieces, he was here with the douche of honor.
I stopped pacing, leaned up against the stall door, and began to take deep breaths to calm myself.
I searched for my cell phone in my camera bag and immediately sent a text to Nicole.
Me—
You are never going to believe who is at a wedding that I am getting ready to shoot right now. . . . Garrett is here! What the fuck am I going to do? I’ve locked myself in a bathroom stall and I am texting you. Want to know what is even better about this? He’s here with the fucking maid of honor! Fuck my life!
My phone went off almost instantly.
Nicole—
Are you shitting me right now? He’s there? Where has he been? How does he look? Is he dating her or just her date at the wedding? Why didn’t you just call me?
Me—
I didn’t call because I am freaking the fuck out! The last thing I need is someone walking into the bathroom while I am talking shit about Bridezilla and the douche of honor. I only spoke with him briefly. He says he’s here with her. That he’s not dating her. I am pretty sure he’s in the Marines or something cuz he’s in uniform. By the way he looks amazing!
Nicole—
#1—Calm the fuck down. #2 – Please God tell me you look hot!
Me—
Well, to say I look hot. . . .LMFAO!! I nearly passed out when I realized it was him. I’m not sure how I am looking. Best description would probably be Hot Mess.
Nicole—
It is going to be ok. You’re going to be fine. Stop panicking and pull yourself together. You need to march your ass back out there and talk to him.
Me—
I can’t go and talk to him. I should be heading back to the bridal suite to take these fucking pictures. Why does this always happen to me?
Nicole—
Do you get a break? Any chance you can sneak away and talk to him?
Me—
I got to go. I’ll try to text you later on and keep you updated.
I put my phone back in my camera bag, pulled myself together, and left the bathroom stall. I walked over to the mirror to see exactly what I looked like. “Holy Hell!” I said out loud. “What a way to make an impression with Garrett, Leila,” I muttered as I stared into the mirror. I leaned over the vanity to get a better look at myself. “Damn, you look like death warmed over.” I placed my camera bag on the counter and dug around for my lipstick, blush and eyeliner hoping they would help with my situation. The only thing that was going to help me was a Christmas Miracle, and I was shit out of luck because it was only September.
Thoughts of our meeting were running through my head. Boy, I could have handled that better. I’d rehearsed what I would say to him in my head probably a million times. There were so many things I wanted to say to him, so many things I wanted to tell him.
Garrett was the last person I had ever expected to see at a wedding I was working. He had pretty much fallen off the face of the earth after our break-up. Our mutual friends never once mentioned his name to me.
After Garrett left, I cut myself off from the world. I refused to leave my room for almost three months. My mother got so worried about me. She started to bring my food to my room and would sit there and watch me eat. I would speak to no one, not even Nicole. She must’ve called and texted fifty times a day. Some days I would just hit ignore on my phone while others, I would just shut it off completely. I was lucky if I slept three or four hours a night. I had lost almost ten pounds, and I looked like a zombie.
Then one day Nicole staged her own form of an intervention. . . .
Nicole showed up at my doorstep in August. I was lying on my bed staring at pictures of Garrett and me, as I did every day. She must have rung the doorbell a hundred times. Eventually, she came around to the back of my house and stood directly under my window. She began to scream at the top of her lungs “Leila, if you don’t open that god damned door, I’m going to kick it in!”
I went to the window and opened it up. “Go away!” I shouted and slammed the window back down.
“No, I’m not going to go away. You’ve sat up in your room feeling sorry for yourself long enough. You are either going to let me in or I will kick the door down,” she yelled back at me.
I could tell by the tone in her voice she meant what she said. I emerged from my room and ran down the stairs worried she was actually going to kick in my door. I was also worried my neighbors were going to call the police.
I flung the door open and she was leaning up against the doorframe with her arms across her chest. “Well, it’s about fucking time,” she snapped.
She pushed her way past me and marched into my kitchen, and I followed her. She lifted herself up onto the kitchen counter. She looked downright furious. “Alright Leila, enough is enough. I know he broke your heart, but you have to move on. You are supposed to start WSU in three weeks!”
I looked at her, hung my head and said shamefully, “I’m not going.”
“Excuse me? I think I may have heard you wrong. Did you just say you are not going?”
“Yeah, you heard me. I am not going!” I said with a bit more confidence in my voice.
“Oh, you’re fucking going!” She said as she launched herself off the counter, making her way to my side of the kitchen. “If I have to personally move into the dorms with you and walk you to every single one of your classes, I will.”
I gave her a funny look and started to laugh.
She stepped closer to me and put her arm around me. “I love you, Leila. But you really need to get your shit together. This is no way to live your life. . . .” A noise from in the lobby woke me from my daydream. I gave myself a long look in the mirror, made sure I was presentable and headed towards the bridal suite. I knew I had to be cordial to Susan and Marie even if it was going to kill me. Katie’s reputation was on the line, not mine. I knocked on the door and then poked my head through.
“Hi, Susan,” I said politely. “Are you ready to put your dress on?”
She glanced at the door and snapped, “Yes.”
I entered the room and I immediately felt the animosity between Susan, Marie and myself. Christ, are these two really going to be bitches all fucking day?
Chapter Five
The rest of the day went fairly well. I tried to be as nice as possible to the douche twins and kept a fake smile plastered on my face at all times. I also tried to keep my distance from Garrett. Although, he was Marie’s date, he was not in the bridal party, and for the most part, he was hanging around the bar while I was taking the formal pictures of the wedding party. He came over from time to time to see if Marie needed or wanted anything. He wrapped his arms around her and whispered into her ear. She gave out an obnoxious loud cackle that made everyone turn their attention to them. I glanced their way and noticed his eyes were on me, and I quickly l
ooked away.
A few more times during the day, I caught him looking at me. The butterflies in my stomach went crazy. It truly amazed me that after all this time he still could havethat effect on me. I could tell by the look in his eyes and the tone in his voice that he had quite a few drinks already. I was always able to tell when he’d been drinking, even if he only had one. He had always been blown away by that and called it one of my many talents…
Seeing him like that made me think about the time we went out for our first Valentine’s Day.
We’d been dating for about three months. Garrett opted not to go to college when he was hired to work full-time at a local paper company. Though it was within walking distance from his house, he saved up enough money to buy a car. It wasn’t anything fancy. Actually, it was kind of beat up, but it got him from point A to point B and that was all that mattered. Usually his point A was his house and his point B was my house.
He called me and told me he was on his way to pick me up, and that he had something special planned for us. Right off the bat, I could tell something was different about his voice. When he showed up at my house, I could smell stale beer on him. I pushed him out of the door and yelled to my mom that I would be home by eleven. I ran to his car and jumped in the driver’s seat, even though I only had my learner’s permit at the time. I was not going to let him get busted for a DUI, when I could drive perfectly fine.
I turned to him and started yelling, “Are you crazy? You’re driving after you’ve been drinking? It’s Valentine’s Day you know, the cops are going to be out in full force! And you are not even old enough to be drinking!”
“Come on, Babe. Don’t be mad,” he said with an adorable smirk on his face. He reached over and grabbed my hand, brought it to his mouth and kissed the back of it.
I looked over at him. With a big smile on my face I said, “God, I hate you. . . Where are you taking me anyway?”
“It’s a surprise.”
“Well you might want to tell me about this surprise since I’m now the one driving.”
“Alright, drive to Wales Park,” he replied.
“Wales Park? It’s freaking freezing out and you want to go to a park?” I asked with doubt in my voice.
“Don’t worry, Babe, I’ll keep you warm,” he winked and gave me a huge smile which made me laugh.
Let’s be clear here, even though I was only sixteen, Garrett was not my first sexual partner. Most kids my age were experimenting with drugs and booze and then there was me, experimenting with sex. So I knew exactly what he meant by “keeping me warm”.
“Oh, really? And what makes you think I want you keeping me warm?” We pulled into the park and I found a spot near the railroad tracks. He took my hand and pulled me closer to him. He put his face up against mine and took a deep breath.
“God, I love the smell of your hair,” he said as he nuzzled his face into my hair.
I pushed him away. “You’re just saying that to get in my pants,” I said grinning from ear to ear.
He reached around me into the back seat of the car and pulled out a gift bag. I gave him a puzzled look.
“Happy Valentine’s Day, Babe,” he said.
“You said no presents,” I said, slapping his chest.
“No, I said, I didn’t want you buying me any presents. I didn’t say anything about me not getting you something. Plus, I made it. It didn’t cost me anything.”
As I went to put my hand inside the bag he said, “Be careful it may cut you.”
I gave him a puzzled look and reached into the bag. I pulled out a heart made of barbed wire that was painted red.
“Do you like it?” He asked excitedly.
“I love it!” I wrapped my arms around him to give him a big hug.
He slowly moved away from me and looked me dead in the eyes. “Babe, I need to tell you something.”
I felt my heart skip a beat, my palms began to sweat and I was feeling anxious. “What?” I said as my voice cracked.
“Why are looking so nervous?” He laughed.
“Because. . . You’re freaking me out!”
He ran his hands through my hair and exhaled. “These past few months have been amazing. I’ve never felt like this about any other girl.”
I swallowed hard, not knowing what to say or do. As I began to speak he put his fingers over my lips.
“Shhh. . . Let me finish. Leila, I’ve never told anyone this before. . . I love you.”
Suddenly, I felt a tap on my shoulder. I jerked around to see Tony the DJ standing there.
“Are you all set with taking pictures? It’s almost time for the bride and groom to be announced.”
“Yes, I’m all set.”
“Great!”
Once Tony gathered the bridal party together and got them in line for their introductions, I made my way into the reception hall. My eyes scanned the room, looking for Garrett. I found him standing with a group of guys by the bar. It appeared as if they were doing tequila shots.
I shot him a smile and kept walking. He returned the smile and went back to drinking. I checked my watch. It was almost 5:30pm. Ok. You can do this, only four more hours. You’re doing good.
The remainder of the night passed by very quickly, the caterers in this place had it down to a science. The next time I checked my watch it was almost time for me to go. I was looking forward to ending the day. It was difficult for me to see Garrett and Marie all over each other on the dance floor. He nuzzled his face into her hair and then stared at me, making me feel very uncomfortable. Marie seemed to really enjoy flaunting his attention at me. They were grinding on the dance floor, and her eyes were always on me. It was almost like she knew Garrett and I had a past, or she was just a super bitch who wanted to show me that the hottest guy in the room was with her. Either way she was really getting on my nerves, and I was so ready to get out of there.
As soon as my watch hit 9:30 PM, I gathered my stuff and got ready to head out to my car. I made sure Garrett was out on the back patio first, and then I made my move. I usually stopped and said my goodbyes to the bride and groom, but in this case, there was no way in hell I was doing that.
As I walked to my car, I realized the temperature must have dropped a good twenty degrees since this afternoon. I shivered and told myself that I should really start keeping a jacket in the back seat of my car. Just as I reached the Honda and opened the door, I heard “Leila! Wait up!” I spun around in shock to see Garrett jogging across the parking lot.
I dropped my head down and whispered, “Fuck, I was so close to getting away.” Apparently, my perfect escape plan sucked ass.
“So, you weren’t even going to say goodbye?” He said as he jogged up to my car.
“Well, I didn’t want to bother you and the douche of honor. She was on you like a fly on shit all night. Does she know who I am?”
“No, she doesn’t know about you. She just became very possessive when she realized a beautiful single woman was staring at me. And like I told you before I am just here with her.”
“What gives you the idea that I am single? And just for the record I wasn’t staring at you, so please don’t flatter yourself,” I snapped.
He winced at my words.
“Um. . . I just assumed because, I saw no ring on your finger. Aww, shit Leila. That didn’t come out right. I just thought you were single. I apologize if you’re dating someone,” he stammered.
“Well, you can tell the douche of honor not to worry, you’re all hers,” I said in a very snotty tone and abruptly turned back towards my car to leave.
His words stopped me. “Babe . . . I . . . I . . . Mean Leila, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to upset you. Please don’t leave angry.”
Dropping my head I said, “Garrett, I’m not leaving angry, I’m just leaving. I didn’t want to have to say goodbye again. The last time we said goodbye it almost killed me. Not that you would’ve known or even cared for that matter.” I was trying so hard to hold back the tears that were welling
up in my eyes.
I felt his body move closer to me, filling the gap between us. The butterflies started going again in my stomach. “Are you sure you are okay?” He asked has he gently touched my shoulder.
I shrugged his hands off. “Yes, I am fine. I’m tired. It has been a really long day and I just want to go home. I still have an hour and a half drive ahead of me and I would like to have some time to relax at Danny’s.”
“Danny? Is he your boyfriend?” He asked in an annoyed tone.
I spun around to face him. “No, Danny’s is the bar I work at. I usually have a few drinks before bed to help me sleep. I don’t sleep much.”
“Oh . . . It was really great to see you, Leila.” He leaned in to give me a hug, and I could smell the alcohol on him.
“Oh, there you are, I’ve been looking all over for you!” We both froze. I peered over his shoulder to see Marie giving me a death stare as she walked towards us.
Garrett abruptly spun around. “I was just walking Lei – I . . . Mean the photographer out to her car. It’s dark out here and I wanted to make sure she got off safe.”
“Well, she’s obviously at her car and she looks pretty safe to me! Can we go back in now? It’s my sister’s wedding and you shouldn’t be seen with the hired help,” she sneered.
His eyes scanned to mine. I nodded my head and said very quietly with a quiver in my voice, “I’m fine, go ahead.”
“It really was great to see you,” he whispered.
As he began to walk away, I jumped into my car and immediately turned on the heat. I was now chilled to the bone, although I was unsure if it was actually from the cold air. I couldn’t get out of there fast enough. It took all of ten seconds for me to pull out of the parking spot before the tears started to fall.
As I drove away, I turned on the radio to keep my mind off of what had just happened, but Katy Perry was singing The One That Got Away. “Really, of all the songs to play on the radio, this song has to be playing right now!” I said out loud. Tears were pooling in my eyes, and I could barely see the road. I pulled over and rolled my window down to get some fresh air. I started to feel the onset of hyperventilation.