Who I Am With You

by Amanda Lanclos

  I hit something, letting her know I’m awake, because I feel slightly guilty for eavesdropping on her. Walking out into the kitchen and seeing her in just my t-shirt makes my cock stand to attention. Come on boy, four times in one night ain’t enough for you?

  “Casey, I’ll call you back.” She listens to her for a second before handing the phone to me. “She wants to talk to you.”

  Grabbing the phone, I place it to my ear. “Well, what do I owe the pleasure?” I drawl into the iPhone.

  “Cut the shit, Dallas. If you hurt her, I’m going to hurt you.” She seethes into my ear. Hurt her? I’m the one whose heart was ripped out of their chest.

  “I’ve never had any intention of hurting her. So, you can stop with the bullshit. And you want to talk about hurting someone? Maybe we should talk about my brother,” I growl.

  “You have got to be kidding me. Austin tell you I broke his little heart? He would, damn bastard.”

  “Wow, you haven’t changed much Cas.” I roll my eyes as I look at Kennedy. She’s looking at me like I’ve lost my mind, but she doesn’t remember the past.

  “Yeah, just like your arrogant cocky ass brother. The one who took my virginity and then was like yeah, I don’t want a girlfriend. But thanks Casey,” her tone comes out monotone and as I sit there, I can see her point. Sounds like him. “Why do you think it was so easy for me to leave with Kennedy? I was running from the pain your arrogant brother caused.”

  “I didn’t know. I’m sorry Cas. I should have known. Here’s Kennedy. Just know, I’d never do anything to hurt her.” The words are a conviction as I speak them. I’d never done anything to hurt her yet.

  “Oh? Hmm, that’s not the story I heard,” she mutters but then the phone goes dead. The fuck?

  Chapter Nine

  “Well, that was awkward,” I shrug my shoulders in an attempt to clear the air. I could cut the tension with a knife as I watch Dallas gripping the kitchen counter. The veins on his arms are popping out from the exertion he’s using on the granite. I’m sure if it was possible he’d be able to crumble that to dust.

  “Kennedy, she said something to me, that really has me thinking,” he seethes as he looks at me. The glare in his eyes is scaring me. If I hadn’t seen the side of him I’d seen last night, I would run and never look back. “I know you can’t remember, but when you do I want to know.”

  “Know what?” I squeak as I lean against the counter.

  “She said I hurt you. Kennedy, I never hurt you. You walked out of MY life,” he hits his chest to make sure I know he means his. “You moved to New York and didn’t look back. I was devastated.”

  “Dallas, I…”

  “No Ken, you listen. I’m not going to lie to you. After you left, I was a mess. I drank, I fucked my way through a lot of women, trying to get you out of my head. But that was months, MONTHS, after you left.” As he looks at me, I notice his hazel eyes look browner from the anger in them. “I’m not perfect, I’ve made my mistakes, but dammit none of them were ever hurting you. I’ve always worshipped the ground you walked on.”

  “Dallas, I can’t remember my past, but just being with you last night confirms that. I don’t think you’d do anything to hurt me.” Tears well in my eyes as I see him clenching his chest as if his heart is in pain. “I… I wish I could remember. It would be so much easier.”

  Walking over to him, I slide my hands over his bare chest. This man is the perfect specimen with how chiseled he is. He shakes his head, before slowly moving away from me. I try to mask my hurt as I walk back to the stove to continue cooking the pancakes I’d made for breakfast. I don’t really know what to say, because I can’t remember what the hell happened. I finish cooking, putting a plate together for him full of eggs, bacon and pancakes. Setting it down in front of him on the bar, I turn back around and go back to fix my own.

  Racking my brain, trying to figure out what the hell happened between us, only causes me to become even more frustrated with myself. I want, no need to know what the hell happened. There is no way I would just walk away from this man. When I feel his hand on me, I jump, sending the pancake out of the pan and up in the air. It lands on the counter with a splat and I can’t help but laugh. The gut tingling laughs continue as I double over from them. He’s laughing with me, the green filling his hazel eyes, making them kind again.

  “What were you thinking about? I called your name twice,” he drawls as he turns the stove off before I end up burning myself.

  “You did? I’m sorry.” I move around him to plate my own food, when his hand grips my arm, effectively stopping me.

  “What was on that beautiful mind of yours?” His eyes stare into mine as if to let me know that he’s going to pull it out of me, regardless of what I want.

  “I was trying to make myself remember,” I mumble, looking away from him. No one understands how horrible it is to wake up and not remember anything about your life. To know that thirteen years of my life are missing. It sucks so damn bad.

  “Kennedy,” he grabs my chin, making me look at him. “Babe, I never meant to make you feel like that. I was just so distraught over the fact that I could have hurt you.”

  “I’m sorry, I promise though, I will work hard to remember.” Tears stream down my face and he pulls me into his chest.

  “I’m an asshole. I shouldn’t have acted that way. You’ll remember on your own terms, I just hope I never hurt you. If I did, I’m as much in the dark as you are.” His hands graze over my lower back and up to my shoulders before repeating their earlier movements.

  “Dallas, unless you want a repeat of last night. I’m really going to need you to stop that.” He chuckles when my breathless words fall onto his ears. “I’m so serious.”

  “Ken, makeup sex is always the best.” His eyes meet mine and the desire in them almost knocks me to my knees.

  “Were we fighting? I’m so confused,” I huff as I slowly lick my lips. He smiles as he leans down, grabbing my hips and hoisting me up onto the counter.

  “Nah, but we may have had a little speed bump.” His eyes trail over my body, making me feel beautiful as he takes in every curve his shirt is hiding.

  “What are you doing?” I try to sound stern, but the truth is I want him just as badly as he wants me.

  “I decided I wanted something else for breakfast, Ken.” He smirks, as his hands slide over my inner thighs. “And, thankfully you helped me by leaving those fine little panties on my floor.”

  “Hey! I cooked that with love! You’re gonna eat it, too!” Crossing my arms over my chest, I glare at him and he laughs.

  “You saying you love me, Kennedy?” His eyes sparkle with amusement as his hands grasp my thighs.

  His words catch me so off guard that all I can do is open my mouth and close it again, much like a fish would do. “I um,” I grasp for words because I may have loved him, but is that what I’m feeling right now?

  “I’m only kidding, Kennedy. But, I really do want you for breakfast, so lean back on those hands of yours and spread your legs.” His voice drops huskily as he kneels down onto the kitchen floor.

  Leaning back on the counter, I obey his command. His head slides between my legs and I moan loudly as I feel his tongue glide between my slick folds. My hand comes out, wrapping my fingers in the brown curls on his head. The man is doing things with his tongue that I would have never known was possible if I wasn’t experiencing them firsthand right now. My mind is on cloud nine and I don’t ever want to leave.

  “Dallas!” I grip the counter with my other hand, my whole body trembling as the pleasure he’s bringing to me rips through me. I don’t even know half the things that are spewing from my mouth as I come all over his tongue.

  “You are one fine woman,” he rasps as he lines his cock to my center and slams inside. My body still trembling from my orgasm is making me want to push him away, but I can’t. Even if this kills me, I’d at least die happily.

  “You feel so good,” I dig my nails into his
shoulders as he slams in and out of me with his massive dick. No man should be as perfect as Dallas. Not only is he devastatingly handsome, successful and well-mannered, the man has a dick that he can use to his advantage. “Oh!” I gasp as he works his hips into me, hitting the spot that always sends me soaring.

  “That’s right baby, come for me. You’re mine,” he growls as he slams into me, my muscles clench down on his cock as my orgasm rips through me sending him into his own.

  “Wow,” I pant as I slide off the counter, my legs are shaking as I hold onto him for support.

  “Damn right. That was incredible.” He looks at me as he kisses my forehead. “Why don’t you go take a shower and I’ll clean the kitchen after I cook you some fresh food.”

  “That sounds amazing,” I start to walk toward the bathroom when I turn around. “Or, you could come join me.”

  “We’d never get out of this house if I did that and sadly I have to take care of the ranch or things will go sour quickly.” He gives me a wink as he pulls the eggs out of the fridge, throwing the contents of my plate in the garbage.

  Walking into the bathroom, I turn the water on before going to the sink. I look through his drawers along the vanity, looking for a toothbrush. When I’ve looked through everything and I can’t find one, I settle on the one sitting on the counter. It’s not like we haven’t swapped enough bodily fluid in the past twenty-four hours. Oh shit. I quickly brush my teeth before I take off the shirt and feel between my legs. My fingers pull away from my swollen lips, covered in his release.

  My body shakes, but for a different reason. What if I get pregnant? “Dallas!” I yell out as I lean against the sink.

  “What is it?” He gasps as he appears at the door in record speed. “Kennedy? Wait do you remember?”

  “No,” I rasp as I catch my breath. “You,” I grab my stomach, trying not to throw up. “You weren’t wearing a condom.”

  “Shit,” he grunts as he looks at me. “I didn’t even think, Kennedy.”

  “What are we going to do?” I shake as I think about bringing a life into this world, when I don’t even remember my own.

  “Ken, if it comes up we will handle it. It used to always be us against the world. Okay, well maybe Austin and Casey too, but we always came out on top.” He gives me that smile, the one that got me in this damn situation and I want to slap him.

  “If it happens, I’m keeping it, just so you know.” When the words come out, his face changes as if I’d slapped him.

  “Damn right we are. Kennedy, I’ve loved you since I was fourteen years old. I don’t care if the last ten years have changed us. I’ve never stopped and I probably never will,” he grabs me, pushing me against the wall and kissing me hard. “If we made a baby, I’m going to enjoy raising it. You ain’t getting rid of me. I’ve already told you, you’re mine.”

  “God, you are hot.” I turn to jelly as the man says the words that every woman wants to hear. “But from now on, we need to use condoms until I can get a test and get put on something.”

  “Deal,” he nods before letting me go. “But, I won’t lie. Being inside you with nothing, feeling you that way again. It was incredible.”

  “Ugh!” I push him with my hand as I walk into the shower, letting the water hit me before I turn back. “And, very irresponsible. We don’t know each other anymore. What if you hate who I was?”

  He comes into my view, grabbing my face on both sides of my cheeks, his eyes blazing into mine. “I could never hate you. My heart,” he grabs my hand, placing it on his chest so that I can feel the organ, pounding underneath my hands. “It beats for you, Kennedy. It was made for you, and only you.”

  “Good God,” I rasp, my own heart beating in rhythm with his, pounding deep inside my chest. “You sure know the words to make a woman’s brain turn to scrambled eggs.”

  He chuckles as he kisses me again. “I’m only pointing out the obvious when it comes to you, babe. It has always and will always be you.”

  “What did I do to deserve you?” I sigh against his chest, smiling as I think about just how much this week has changed my life.

  “You’ve just been you, Ken. If I’m being honest, I think we were destined to be together.” His voice trails off as he kisses my head. “Come on, I gotta get out there and take care of the horses and cattle. You wanna come help me?”

  “Um, I would love to. But, I have to go help Stella. She pays me,” I grumble as I kick at the floor.

  “Oh good Lord, that woman is a trip,” he laughs as he slides a shirt over his chest, effectively cutting off my view.

  “A trip? A pain in the ass, maybe.” I slide on the clothes I had on, making a mental note to pack more clothing into my rental in case I need it.

  “Nah, you just need to get to know her better. She’s really a good lady.”

  “She is,” I smile sincerely, which shocks me. Up until now, I’d thought she’d just been this annoying lady who made me do annoying things, but she was trying to get us back together. “She just wanted us to be together again.”

  “Well, we are. You’re mine, I’ll tell you until you believe it.” He kisses my lips before winking and walking toward the kitchen. “Can I take you out on a date tonight?”

  “Really?” I trail behind him, shocked that he’d ask. “I’d love that.”

  “Good, I want the town to know my girl is back with me.”

  “I was wondering when you was gonna show on up here,” Stella cackles as I walk up to her porch. “Been over there with ole Dallas, huh?” She waggles her eyebrows making me turn the shade of the tomato in her hand.

  “Now, that’s none of your business,” I haughtily reply. I cross my hands over my chest, hating that she knows exactly what I’ve been doing.

  “That boy is too my business. I’ve been watching over that boy for years now. But, you’re good for him.” She pats my hand and smiles. “Now, help me cook a meal, cause after today I have a feeling you won’t be coming to work for me anymore.”

  “Why? Are you firing me?” I look at her in shock as she laughs at me. “What’s so funny, Stella?”

  “Girl, ain’t nobody doing no firing, but I have a feeling that Dallas is gonna want his woman with him. And, you need to be.” She nods as she heads into the house. “Besides, I’ll be bothering you enough. I like seeing that man without his shirt on too much.” She chuckles as she goes into the kitchen and pulls out the ingredients to make a cake.

  “What’s the occasion?” She normally doesn’t pull the cake mix out, from what she’s told me. Unless it’s something important.

  “Gotta go on over to the church tonight for bible study. We normally bring a little something for it. I decided to make one of my famous Coca-Cola cakes.”

  “A what?”

  “You’re gonna find out soon enough. Come on, we can make two and you can eat one with Dallas, after your date.” She grins coyly as she goes to sifting flour.

  “How’d you know about my date?”

  “He called me.”

  “He called you? For what?” I am seeing red, because now I see why she doesn’t think I would be here after today. He told her he didn’t want me to be.

  “Now, I see those wheels turning in that pretty little head of yours. And they spinning so fast in the wrong direction, you gonna sabotage yourself before you even start.” She continues to sift the flour and other ingredients while I seethe. “He called to thank me for sending you back to him.”

  “Oh,” I mumble under my breath. “Well, I guess he’s right. I appreciate it too.”

  “Yeah, well I knew you’d be good for him.”

  “How can you be so sure? I’m afraid that when I remember what sent me running from him in the first place, I may do it again.” I can’t believe I’ve just voiced my fears to Stella. She may be the best thing to happen, because she brought me back to Dallas, but for some reason I think I’d have run into him eventually.

  “Because, I think you aren’t remembering anything for
now because you’re making a future built on the here and now, not the past. It’s called the present for a reason. You’re giving yourself a chance to start over, with the man that God intended you to be with, girl. Don’t be stupid.” She smacks my hand with her wooden spoon before she starts stirring the ingredients in her bowl.

  “Did you really just pour a whole bottle of Coke in there?” My voice is shrill as I watch her stir the cake batter full of coke.

  “Oh dear God. Baby, why do you think it’s called Coca-Cola cake?”

  “Oh,” I sigh. “That would make sense.” I laugh softly as she shakes her head muttering something that sounds oddly like ‘what am I going to do with you’.

  “Baby girl, I think all that bleach you putting on that head of yours is killing your brain,” Stella looks at me as my mouth hangs open in shock. “Or, you just aren’t the brightest color in the box,” she mumbles under her breath as if I’m not standing there within range to hear her.

  “I am very bright! I run my own business!” I huff, throwing my hands in the air. “You’re an infuriating old woman!”

  “Old? Baby, don’t make me go toe to toe with you. This old woman will put your ass on the floor in a pile so fast.” Her eyes blaze with irritation as she stares at me.

  I buckle over in laughter as I hold my sides. “Oh, goodness,” I pant as I try to catch my breath. “Stella, I love you.” Tears are streaming from my eyes as she looks at me as if I’ve gone mental.

  “Maybe I shouldn’t have hooked you up with my sweet Dallas. You may be too damn crazy for him.”

  “I’m not crazy, Stella.”

  “Sure, you keep telling yourself that.” Shaking her head, she uses her hands to spread Crisco oil onto the pan before sprinkling it with flour.

  I stand there watching in fascination as she expertly pours the batter into the pans and places them into the oven. As they cook she makes her icing, all from scratch, because that’s what Stella does. Or, so I’ve been told. That woman never uses store bought stuff, it’s always homemade.