by Rita Hestand
"Yeah, he was a good man. He liked you too. He told me many times before he died, he wished we'd have just taken you with us. He knew it was too late, but he still wished it so. He just figured a little girl had no business traipsing around the country with two men."
"I thought you said he didn't want you taking me out of there."
"He didn't at the first, but the last time we were here, and we stayed with you and the Cheyenne, he regretted not taking you with us. But after we left your camp, he'd often sit around the fire and tell me we should have. He knew you were better off with a tribe of Indians than two men wandering about the countryside. Wasn't a life for a girl. He couldn't offer you anything. We never officially had a home, except maybe the fort."
"You live at the fort now?" She glanced away.
"When I'm there, but I'm not there very often. I no sooner get back from one thing, and they have something else for me."
"Do you like scouting?"
"Sometimes, I get to see the country, meet some nice people. Meet some onry people too."
"And you never married, why?" She asked innocently.
"I don't know… "
"You kiss like you know how… had a lot of practice I guess." she smiled.
"You think so?" He grinned at her.
"Have you ever had a lady?"
He stared at her intently, "That's not a lady-like question to ask a man."
"I know that. But you're my friend and I feel like I can ask you anything." She stared into his eyes now.
He put his fingers on her cheek now and his thumb stroked her there. She stared with wonder.
"Let's just say I've been around the barn with a few unsavory kind of women… "
She frowned, he took his hand away. "Unsavory…. Am I unsavory?"
He reached to push a strand of her hair from her face, "No," he said softly. "You're not. But then, I haven't been around the barn with you, either."
She chuckled, nearly choking on her coffee.
"Then I guess you won't go behind the barn with me, will you?" she chuckled.
"Don't tempt me, Lucy. You're not the kind to go behind the barn with."
"I'm not?" She swallowed as he stared into her eyes and smiled.
"No," his grin suddenly faded. "You're the kind a man takes to his bed… " he said softly, his finger dotting her nose as he got up and moved away. "You're the kind a man marries… "
"Do you even believe in marriage?" she asked softly.
He came back toward her, staring at her. "Of course, I do."
Spellbound, she sat there sipping the rest of her coffee and wondering exactly what he meant by that. If he believed in it, why hadn't he married?
The way she felt about Aiden was so different than anyone else in her life. She knew about men and women and how they made love, the Indians were not shy about it. But she'd never found anyone she wanted in that way… except…
She thought about Claw Hand suddenly. They'd never made love. They were both too shy and the timing just wasn't right. She didn't love him that way, and she was pretty sure he didn't love her that way either. They were simply companions that took care of each other. They had a good life together, but… there was something lacking.
But Aiden was the man she'd waited a lifetime for. She had loved him so long, and so deeply for so many different reasons. And their kisses sizzled against her heart when she thought about them. Even if he never kissed her again, she'd hold those kisses close. He was the only man that kissed her like that, the only man she'd let kiss her like that.
When she'd kissed Aiden that day, jumping from the tree, she kissed with all her heart, and strangely he hadn't scolded her for it. She wondered why.
She had no business kissing him like that, but she loved him so much, so hard, she could do no less when she saw him. After all, it had been four long years.
Four years of missing Aiden, God, she was pitiful.
She had longed for the day when she was old enough to tell him how she felt, but now she wasn't sure she could. She knew if it was meant to be, it would happen, sooner or later. And if it wasn't, she would have to satisfy herself some other way. They flirted with each other, and it was fun, but he had no idea that she really meant all the things she said to him.
Aiden would have a beautiful woman. A woman more like Gloria. She was a real lady. And he deserved someone like her, someone who could warm his bed and make love like an adult.
She had wondered how making love would be. She knew she would throw her whole heart into it, just like she had with the kiss. She would be wild, reckless even, engaging, but what kind of man would want that from a woman?
But she knew now, after seeing Aiden again, that she would never love another. And it saddened her.
She got up and started cooking and the others began to rouse.
Pumpkin came to help her, and they talked. Gloria was fixing her hair and adjusting her clothes. This was not the kind of life she was used to.
But the one thing Lucy smiled about was that perhaps Gloria and her husband would get along better now. Already they were clinging to each other more and Gloria hadn't mentioned the child in a couple of days now.
Perhaps the lie between them was gone and they could move on with their lives together. She prayed it was so. She liked happy endings.
But along about noon someone busted the doorway of the cave and walked in with guns loaded. It was two very big men with sizable guns in their hands. They weren't good men either, Lucy sized them up quickly. They had dirty looking hair and teeth and smelled like a buffalo hunter.
Angus bristled. But the men didn't hesitate to aim their guns at him if he tried anything.
"What we got here?" one of the big ugly men asked. They walked around the women, ignoring Frank and watching Angus. They didn't see Aiden in the back by the horses.
"Bunch of misfits, looks like. A lady and a dandy, an old trapper and his squaw, and well now… " One of them that was doing the talking moved toward Lucy.
He eyed her sharply up and down.
She didn't back up, she didn't show fear, but inside she was shaking.
"You don't look like no lady. No sir, you look like some kind of white squaw."
Lucy held her head high.
"I wouldn't touch her mister, if I were you." Aiden came from the back of the cave toward them.
"Oh, and why the hell not?"
"Well for one, you don't know who you are dealing with." Aiden smirked.
"Oh, and who is that?"
"She's the White Silver Fox." Aiden told them.
"Do tell!" The biggest man came up to her and studied her. "I've heard of her. Didn't think I'd actually ever see her, though. She's kind of little to have such a big name, though, don't you think?"
"She might be little, but she's handy with a knife," Aiden threatened.
"Maybe I'll just take her and see how handy she is."
Gloria shrieked. "Please, what do you want?"
The man turned to look at Gloria now. "Well now, this one's got some class and spunk."
"Get your hands off her mister," Lucy yelled at him as the man stroked Gloria's cheek.
"Jesse, what do you think?"
"Too high class for us, and you know it. But now that white squaw, who'd care if we took her? I think I want to see what this White Silver Fox has underneath all them clothes… The way I see it, I can't tell if she's a man or a woman." The man came closer and he unfastened his pants and they fell to the floor. He was naked from his waist down, as his pants fell to his boots.
Gloria shrieked again at his audacity.
Lucy whipped out her knife and stuck it under his chins as he tried to get out of his pants.
Gloria shrieked.
"What the hell, lady?"
"Pull them back up and back off." Lucy instructed as she wield the knife in her hands.
He started to laugh, and she sneered at him, "Or I might just cut the protruding parts of your body off." She grit her teeth and gl
ared at him boldly. He'd never know she was as shook up as Gloria, no one would, except maybe Aiden.
She moved the knife to below his waist.
"Okay, okay… you made your point." He frowned, "I thought he was foolin' tellin' me you’re the White Silver Fox, but then you wield that knife like you know how to use it."
"I do, and I will."
He pulled his pants up.
The other man turned to face her now and sneered at her, "I reckon I can hold her down if you really want her."
"And I reckon I'll shoot you dead, if you touch one hair on her head." Aiden came forward now, he'd politely taken Angus gun from his hip while they were busy with Lucy.
"If she's really the White Silver Fox, what the hell do you care?" The big man eyed Aiden sharply. "You into white squaws?"
"That's not your concern. Your concern is that I'm going to shoot you dead if you even try to touch her."
Jesse scrambled for his pants that fell when Aiden moved closer. The other looked shocked that he hadn't been prepared.
"There's the door, get out, and don't come back." Aiden told them.
They moved slowly toward the door. Jesse cast Lucy a snide grin. "Maybe we'll run into you later…"
"I wouldn't count on it mister." Aiden cocked his gun.
Aiden followed them.
Gloria let out a breath. Lucy put her knife up.
Aiden handed Angus his gun and smiled at him. "Well, that was an interesting way to spend the morning, wasn't it?"
Gloria stared at Lucy, "I can't believe you pulled a knife on that man and almost cut off… " she stopped then laughed.
Lucy grinned. "He was a lot bigger than me, but I figure a knife will kind of even the odds. Especially where I aimed to cut. Funny, how men are squeamish about things like that."
Aiden shot her a smile. "You've haven't lost your touch."
"Can't afford to." She told him with a grin.
Then he saw her hands shaking, and his grin faded. She might look tough, act tough, but underneath it all, she was all woman, and he was just now realizing how much. What was it that scared her? He knew her well, she didn't scare that easily, but something had bothered her.
Chapter Eleven
That evening as Angus and Pumpkin turned in, and Gloria and Frank went to bed, Aiden and Lucy sat by the fire talking.
He asked about some of the Indians he favored from her tribe. She told him all about them. He asked about her father, Chief Yellow Deer.
"He's beginning to age. I'm sure Long Knife will take over the tribe soon."
"You don't like Long Knife, do you?"
"I don't think he'll be as good a chief, that's for sure."
"Why?"
"He hates the whites and he'll make war. When he takes over, my powers with the tribe won't matter, for he won't listen. He has no intention of living on a reservation. Or taking orders from me. He's the reason Claw Hand and I married."
Aiden eyed her, "What do you mean?"
"Long Knife wanted to marry me. I didn't. He went to Yellow Deer and asked for me personal like. Yellow Deer said if he offered enough, I was his."
"Yellow Deer would have given you to him?" Aiden frowned.
"Yes, it's his son, Aiden. But Claw Hand offered more horses. He knew I didn't want to marry Long Knife."
"Did Long Knife ever try anything with you?"
"Yes… "
"Did he hurt you?"
"Yes."
"It's a long story and not a nice one, Aiden. When Claw Hand died, I left the tribe, Aiden…"
"You left the tribe?"
"I had to. With Claw Hand dead, Yellow Deer would let Long Knife have me. I knew that, so I left."
"What have you been doing…"
"What do you mean?"
"I mean, have you been traipsing around the mountains here alone, all that time?"
"I stayed with the Sioux camp for a while. But when the Cheyenne moved closer to them, I left there. I won't marry Long Knife." She insisted. "He'd have found me there. I had to move again."
"My God, honey, why didn't you tell me?"
"It wasn't your worry, it's mine."
"Is this Long Knife dangerous?"
"He'll make war if Yellow Deer dies."
"I mean is he dangerous to you?"
"Only if he finds me." She insisted. She saw the distress on Aiden's face, and moved away from him. "It's not your worry, Aiden."
"I'm not gonna let you climb all over these mountains alone."
"I can take care of myself, Aiden. You should know that. I've been doing it for six months now, without a problem."
"Six months. You must be petrified of him to leave the tribe like that." Aiden paced.
"I won't marry a man like that."
"A man like what?" Aiden came closer.
"You just won't leave it alone, will ya?" she asked.
"I want the whole story and don't leave anything out." He told her, his gaze narrowing on her now.
"He raped a squaw, White Deer, when she screamed, he slit her throat. She died instantly" Lucy's eyes teared up. "She was my friend, he killed her because she was scared of him."
"Does Yellow Deer know this?"
"No."
"Why not?" Aiden stared one more.
Now a tear did escape, she turned away. "Because I came upon them, when she screamed. I saw what he'd done, I saw him running away. He knows I saw!"
"Your petrified of him."
"He's Yellow Deer's son. Yellow Deer raised me. How could I hurt him by telling him?
"Did you tell Claw Hand?"
"Yes, that's why he offered so many horses for me, and married me. If Long Knife bothered me then, the tribe would know of it and send Long Knife away."
"Why didn't you tell me this?"
"I don't want you involved in it. That's why I didn't want to go back to the Cheyenne when we left the Sioux."
"When those men came in here, you were scared. It's not like you to be scared. Did Long Knife ever hurt you?"
She turned away.
She was crying now and moving about. "He caught me one night as I was bathing in the river. He…. He raped me and held a knife at my throat while he did it. He said if I ever told Yellow Deer, he'd kill me."
"My God," Aiden cried out and jerked her into his arms. "I'll kill him, myself."
"No, no Aiden. Don't you see, after that I couldn't tell Yellow Deer, I was too ashamed."
"We have to set this straight Lucy, you can't run around the countryside like this forever." He told her.
"Look, I'll go to your fort. I'll listen, and if you can bring Yellow Deer to me, I'll tell him what they want. He'll listen. But I can't go back to the camp."
"I'll never let him hurt you again. My God, Lucy, you weren't even going to tell me about this?"
"No, it is not your concern. I can take care of myself."
"Did he ever touch you again?"
"No."
"Was that your first time?"
"Yes… " she said not looking at him.
"We'll talk about this later, after I've had time to think." Aiden told her.
"My father will listen to me, and he will make the others listen, but many of the young bucks feel as Long Knife does. They'd rather go out in a blaze of glory than die on a reservation. Already there are rumors that the whites want our land agin. They've found gold, and miners come. Many settlers have tried to move up here, Long Knife does what he can to discourage that of course. He has killed many times. He is very dangerous. But some day, he will get what is coming to him."
"So, what you are saying is, your father will comply with the White soldiers, but Long Knife won't."
"That's about the size of it, Aiden."
"And what does this mean for you?"
"I don't know. The hills are precious to my father, to be able to hunt exclusively here, to roam the hills and be happy means so much to him. But settlers come, they invade the land and the army does not make them move. They want to cut down
the trees and look for gold and silver.
"Long Knife would rather die than see them take the hills from us. And they will take them, Aiden, it's only a matter of time. And in some ways, I can't blame them."
"I'm worried about you Lucy."
She turned to look at him "I'll be fine."
"Not alone you won't. But you're not going to be alone any more. I'll never let him touch you again."
It was obvious that both couples were heavily engaged in sex from the grunts and groans and moans.
Lucy's face was flushed.
"Guess married life is pretty satisfying," Aiden remarked with an amused grin.
"I guess." Lucy remarked, trying her best to ignore the sounds. "Thanks for sticking up for me today."
"You don't have to thank me for that," he nudged her on the shoulder. "I'd have killed them before I let them touch you."
"You don't have to be a hero for my sake Aiden." She glanced at him and grinned.
"Tell me, would you have cut it off?" He grinned at her now.
Her face turned bright red, but she chuckled. "I doubt it, men can't seem to live without them. Besides I didn't want to shock Gloria." She nudged him back. Then she added, "But if I'd have been alone, yes, I would have, in a heartbeat, for I will let no man take me like a whore again. Never again. And that was why I was shaking. It brought back that memory."
"I believe you would." He put his arm around her. "And I'm glad you've got the good sense to know what to do."
"What's this idea you have when we go to the fort." She asked out of the blue. As she set her cup down on the ground.
"I was thinking that if I take you back in a white woman's dress, maybe things would be easier for you. Would you wear a dress? I mean a white woman's dress."
She stared for a long moment, "You think a dress is going to change their attitude?"
"Not entirely but showing them, you are white might make them treat you better." He told her. "Especially the women and the officers."
She stared him in the eyes, "Are you ashamed to know me as I am? Is that why you suggest such a thing?"
"Not at all." He didn't hesitate to say. "I like who you are Lucy. But I want them to treat you right, like a lady, the lady you are."
She sighed, "Then I will wear one, but where will we get one?" She asked.