Ruined

by Shiloh Walker

  He made a gesture toward his face, but it wasn’t so much about the scars, or his messed-up eye and the impaired vision. It was about what had led to it—Hanson. Monica. All of it. “Just stop. This is one area you have no say in—no right to speak. You think I’ve been brooding . . . over Monica.”

  Taking a few steps toward his now silent brother, he said, “In a way, you’re right. I have been—because I’ve been blaming myself.” When Zach started to speak, Sebastien just talked over him. “I should have seen it, realized something was wrong. I should have been able to save her—something. It was my fault—that was why I was brooding. But over the past few months, I started to realize maybe it wasn’t. Maybe I didn’t need to drown myself in a bottle. The person to blame was the son of a bitch who killed her—and the bastards who let him walk every time somebody else accused him of abuse. But not me . . . and not her.”

  Zach opened his mouth, then closed it.

  “What, nothing to say there?” Sebastien crossed his arms over his chest. “

  “Seb . . .” Zach expelled a harsh breath of air. “Look, I know you went through a rough time. I think . . . No. I know that’s why this has me tripped up. I don’t want you latching on to something and hoping it will last just because it seems like . . . I dunno . . . something good.”

  “Something good? You think me being in love with Marin is something I’m latching on to because it’s . . . something good?” Sebastien didn’t know if he wanted to laugh and explode. “You’re not getting it. I’m not latching on. I’m in love with her. She’s pregnant with my baby. That’s all good . . . and it’s all real. I don’t have to make up fairy tales to be happy and I’m not chasing oblivion in a bottle, either.”

  “Not yet.”

  The calm response had Sebastien jerking his head back. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

  “Marin. She’s in love with you?” The words, so flatly stated, caught Sebastien off guard.

  “What?”

  Zach turned around, shoving his hair back before leaning over the desk. They were in a library, a bright open one with windows that faced out over the property. The sun slanted in through the windows, but the party was taking place out back and these windows faced out over the side yard and the desert.

  “Well, that answers the question.” Zach nodded, but not like he was happy with himself.” You two don’t act like people who are in love with each other, Seb. Abby sees me and she kisses me. I see her and I do the same. Keelie can’t keep her eyes off Zane, and have you seen how Ressa is with Trey? He can’t be near her without playing with her hair or touching her in some way. And Mom and Dad? Married almost forty years and they’re the same way.” Zach turned to him. “I haven’t seen you touch her except for when you two dropped that bomb on us. You’re not dating. The papers would be having a field day with it if you were. Marin always tells Abby when she’s hooked up and I end up hearing about it through her. Abby’s been teasing me about how she thinks you two might have something going, but if Marin was in love . . .” Zach laughed a little. “When she falls in love, we’re always the first to know, Seb.”

  Zach continued to stare at him, commiseration in his eyes.

  “You know what, Zach? Fuck you.”

  ***

  Zach’s words echoed in her mind as she strode away from the library.

  “When she falls in love, we’re always the first to know.”

  She loved him, but sometimes, she wanted to smack him. She’d almost walked right into the library and done it, right there.

  But she’d stopped herself.

  She had a better idea.

  Marin strode through the house, one goal in mind.

  “Hey, wait . . . Wait up. Where are you going?”

  “I’m taking care of something.” When Abby caught her arm, Marin slowed, but only a little.

  “Look, all of that . . .” Abby tried for a smile, but it was a miserable attempt. Hard to tell she used to be an actress. “Zach means well, you know that.”

  “Zach’s a dumb-ass,” Marin retorted. “When you go yell at him, be sure to tell him I said that.”

  When Abby saw Marin grab her purse from the stand by the door, her eyes widened. “Hey, you’re not—oh, no. You are not leaving. Not like this.”

  “I’m not leaving, per se.” Marin grabbed Abby and hauled her in for a quick hug. “Like I said, I’m taking care of something. And do me a favor—make sure you tell Zach what I said. I’ll be back soon.”

  “But . . .”

  Marin closed the door on Abby’s attempt to stop her, striding for the rental car. Sebastien had listed her as a secondary driver, although she’d told him she didn’t plan on driving his phallic symbol. Now she was glad he had, because she needed transportation.

  Zach’s words circled in her head, over and over.

  “When she falls in love, we’re always the first to know, Seb.”

  “My ass.” Throwing the car into reverse, she left a little plume of dust as she backed out and another when she came out of the three-point turn. Just because she wasn’t overly fond of the Corvette didn’t mean she didn’t know how to handle a sports car.

  She was in Tucson in under thirty minutes and at her destination in under forty.

  Overall, her trip took less than two hours. Impressive, considering she was making one of the biggest purchases of her life.

  ***

  “You are a dumb-ass.”

  Zach flinched as a book smacked down on his head.

  Abby glared at him.

  “What?” he asked warily, although he had a bad feeling forming in his gut.

  She went to smack him again, but he dodged. That caused him to spill the whiskey he’d been drinking and it went all over him and the nice, comfy jade-green leather couch. Well, at least it wasn’t white. And leather cleaned up pretty easy, right?

  Still wary, he got up while the whiskey continued to soak through his jeans. “What’s this about, Abs?” He gave her the smile she’d once told him melted her knees.

  “Dumb-ass,” she said again, not swayed by the smile at all. She threw the book down, still glaring at him.

  “You’ve said that.”

  “The first one was for Marin.” Abby crossed her arms over her chest and glared at him. That position did amazing things for her breasts, but when his eyes strayed, hers narrowed and he immediately focused back on her face. “The second time was for me. I might say it again, too.”

  Running his tongue across his teeth, Zach pondered that, and then he said, “If I’m going to be verbally abused, I need to refill my glass.”

  “Don’t you want to know why Marin and I think you’re a dumb-ass?”

  Zach thought he probably didn’t want to know. Especially if it had Abby mad at him. “Well . . .”

  Not giving him a chance to finish, she came up behind him and leaned in, her lips just an inch from his ear. Abby was a tall woman and with the heels she’d worn, it put them just about eye to eye. He’d told her earlier that he planned to turn her around and put her over the couch the second they got home. She’d gotten pink in the face and told him she’d hold him to it. Now he was thinking he might be sleeping on the couch—alone.

  For a week.

  “You didn’t close the door all the way, baby. Some people heard that man-to-man talk you had with Sebastien. Including me . . . and Marin.”

  Zach closed his eyes, squeezing them shut so hard he saw starbursts of color behind his lids. “Son of a . . .”

  “Bastard.”

  He jerked his head around and saw Sebastien standing just a few feet away.

  “Aw, hell.” Tipping his head back, he stared up at the ceiling. Then, because there wasn’t much to be done for it, he refilled his whiskey and tossed it back. He considered having another because this was going to hurt. Sebastien’s hands were
almost the size of dinner plates nowadays and he had plenty of muscle to back those hands up.

  But he didn’t. Setting the glass down with a decisive clink, he turned to Sebastien and held out his hands at his side. “Come on, then. Get it over with.”

  Abby made a derisive snort as she came around to stand between them, looking from him to Sebastien.

  “Seb . . .” she began.

  Zach cut her off. “It’s cool, Abby. I probably deserve it and it will make him feel better.”

  “No.” Sebastien was the one who spoke, his voice gentle, deceptively so. “It won’t.”

  He turned around and walked off.

  Abby sighed and looked at Zach. “You’re almost right, Zach. I think you do deserve it. But it won’t make him feel better. Marin left.”

  Zach’s mouth fell open. “She . . . what?”

  Abby turned and walked away, leaving him there. He didn’t see the smile curling her lips. He felt bad, which she figured was what he needed—for a little bit. Marin had already texted her and told she’d be on her way back soon.

  She had no idea what her friend was up to, but she’d seen something in Marin’s face when her friend looked at Sebastien.

  Zach hadn’t quite figured it out yet, but he would. The man she married wasn’t an idiot. Willfully blind, maybe, but not an idiot.

  Chapter Eighteen

  Where are you?

  He’d sent Marin the text maybe ten minutes after the mess with Zach, and it had taken her twenty minutes to text back. During those twenty minutes, Sebastien had figured one thing out.

  Marin wasn’t at the house any longer. That brilliant deduction was made upon discovering the absence of the rental car. He’d kept from texting her again, waiting until his temper cooled, because he didn’t want take his anger out on her—Zach’s hard head would be better.

  Her answer had just now popped up.

  About ready to head back. See you soon.

  He almost texted her again, but held off.

  He didn’t know why she’d left. Okay, it had something to do with what she’d heard. He didn’t know what she’d heard, exactly. Quite a bit had been said. He didn’t know how much she’d heard.

  Hopefully she’d tell him.

  He might have to rethink his decision to hit Zach, but for now, he was staying exactly where he was, right on the porch that faced out over the road.

  Keelie and Zane had no neighbors.

  The beautiful house was set back from the road on an isolated piece of land and it made it easy to see when somebody was coming.

  It took a little more time to ascertain that the vehicle coming maybe a half hour later was the Corvette he’d rented. She drove it like a pro and he couldn’t help but smirk as he recalled the dry remark she’d made about the overtly “phallic-ness” of the car—or something to that effect. Apparently she knew how to handle penis symbols.

  He was on his feet as she turned down the drive and walking toward her when she pulled the car into the empty spot at the end of the U.

  He opened the door and without waiting for her to say anything, he caught her chin and kissed her, rough and desperate, one arm going around her waist while he pushed the other into her hair. They were both breathing harder when he ended the kiss. “Where in the hell did you go?”

  “I . . . um . . .” She paused and licked her lips. Her lashes lifted up and the lambent heat there made him want to kiss her all over again.

  He almost did, but he made himself stop before he could. “Well?”

  “I decided to go shopping. Sometimes a girl just gets that urge, Seb.” She turned away and reached back into the car.

  His eyes dropped to her butt and the way the long, skinny skirt drew tight against her curves. He didn’t touch. At least not until she was facing him again, and then he rested a hand on her hip, searching her eyes. They were bright, glinting with a hot light. But he knew Marin—despite what some asshole brother of his might think. She wasn’t mad, but she was up to something.

  “I know you heard,” he said, deciding that the beating around the bush bullshit was for the birds.

  She smiled and leaned in, pressing her lips to his. “I’m not surprised. I told Abby to give Zach a message.”

  “What, that he’s an idiot?”

  “Close.” She nudged him back and he let her, watching as she closed the door. She held one bag in her hand.

  One.

  “If you had a mad rush to go shopping to vent some fury, you didn’t buy much.”

  “Well, if you know what you’re looking for, you don’t need to buy much.” She took his hand and they started to walk. “Come on. My sunscreen has probably worn off. We don’t need to piss Sojo off.”

  Sebastien scowled but managed not to mutter, “Fuck Sojo,” under his breath. If he had done that, she’d probably hear about it and she’d make his life hell. He didn’t need that on top of the rest of the bullshit he was dealing with. Judging by the look Marin slid him, she was picking up on his thoughts just fine, though.

  “You can’t yell at me for thinking something,” he said.

  “I can’t read your mind.”

  “Yeah, you go ahead and say that. I can tell by the smirk on your face you knew exactly what I was thinking.” He opened the door, still looking over his shoulder at her and almost crashed into Zach. Stopping in his tracks, he hissed out a breath. “You’re not who I want to see right now, Zach. Maybe in a few hours. Or in a few days. Thanksgiving, at the very latest.”

  Zach opened his mouth. Marin slid between them, even as Abby popped up, from out of nowhere, it seemed to Sebastien. How a tall, redheaded bombshell could manage to remain inconspicuous until that very moment, he had no idea, but he could have sworn she hadn’t been in the entryway. “Zach needs to say something, Seb. Then I’ll drag him away, okay?”

  This time, he was the one who opened his mouth—and Marin cut him off. Looping her arm through his, Marin tugged him away from Zach and into the living room as she said, “Zach can talk in a few minutes, Abby. Trust me, he had the floor long enough earlier. It’s my turn to speak now. Where is everybody?”

  “Outside—” Abby started to say, only to be cut off by Keelie.

  “Some of them are. I came in to refill the margaritas. They are going like mad out there. Hey, Marin. You’re back.” Her gaze slid from Zach to Sebastien, and then she glanced over her shoulder. “Zane, you might be playing referee in a few minutes.”

  “Shit. I’ll just get Mom. I’m not getting involved in this. If Zach’s going to be stupid . . .” Zane wandered in, looked from his wife to his brothers, then to Abby before finally settling his gaze on Marin. A slow, smug grin lit his face. “Nah, matter of fact, I think Marin can probably handle this.”

  He made his way farther into the living room. “Come on, Keelie. This will probably be fun.”

  Sebastien said, “Actually, I think this is—”

  “Oh, it’s going to be entertaining,” Marin said, cutting him off—again. Then she leaned over and pressed a loud, smacking kiss to his lips. He was caught off guard by that enough to go quiet. For a minute. “Hey, Abby, why don’t you and the hero go round up everybody else?”

  “I’m not—” Zach snapped.

  Abby slapped his arm before he could finish, and then hooked hers through his elbow and began to drag him along. “Come on. I might let you out of the doghouse in the next month if you do whatever it takes to keep our pregnant friend happy, Zach.”

  Javi and his wife passed by next, pausing to wave at Keelie and tell Zane bye and happy birthday. Marin waved them in. “Stay a little longer. I’ve got . . . something.” She didn’t want to go any further than that.

  “Something bigger than ‘we’re pregnant’?” Javi joked. “What, you getting married now? Can I sell it to the tabloids and get money?” The beautiful woman at his sid
e elbowed him sharply and he consoled her. “I’m joking, mi corazón . . . I’m joking.”

  While the two of them bickered, Marin turned toward Sebastien. If she knew Abby, her friend would have the rest marching in here in no time so she smiled up at him.

  “Zach and Abby used to be the first people to know,” she said, leaning against him and wrapping her arms around his shoulders.

  Sebastien didn’t have any trouble following, either. He knew exactly what she was talking about. “Marin, look . . .”

  Sliding a hand down, she pressed a fingertip to his lips. “But if you ask Abby when the last time I called her all bubbling over about a guy? She’s going to tell you it’s been a while. A long while. Probably . . . man, five or six years. I used to think every other guy I met might be the one. Then it got harder and harder to figure out who the one might be, because none of them were the one. So I stopped calling.”

  Swaying closer, she pressed her lips to his, a warm, satisfied pleasure curling through her. Eyes still on his. “The first time I really started feeling a tug for a guy was . . . well, I didn’t want to think too much about it. He seemed all wrong. Younger, focused on so many other things and definitely not headed in the direction I was.”

  Sebastien had gone rigid against her. But Marin didn’t stop speaking. He needed to be the first to know.

  It had just hit her not that long ago, but it was right. All around her, people had gone quiet and she realized some of those standing close might be able to hear. But that didn’t stop her. “Then this awful thing happened . . . and well. We won’t get into that. I started spending more time around him, though, and that tug got stronger and stronger, but I still didn’t tell Abby . . . or Zach. It just didn’t occur to me. They’re still my friends, but I’ve got another friend—he’s probably the best friend I’ve got. And yes . . . I did know what you were thinking outside.”

  Grinning at him, she said, “Don’t worry. I won’t tell the director what you were thinking.”

  “Marin . . .” Sebastien said, his voice a low growl.