The Wolf Within Me

by Cheree Alsop

  Haunted High Book 1

  The Wolf Within Me

  By Cheree Alsop

  Copyright © 2017 by Cheree L. Alsop

  All rights reserved. This book or any portion thereof may not be reproduced or used in any manner whatsoever without the express written permission of the author except for the use of brief quotations in a book review.

  This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents are a product of the author’s imagination. Any resemblance to actual persons, events, or locales is entirely coincidental.

  ISBN

  Cover Design by Robert Emerson

  Editing by Sue Player

  www.ChereeAlsop.com

  To my husband Michael

  and our children Myree, Aiden, and Ashton:

  I love you with all of my heart.

  To my readers:

  Never underestimate the worth and power

  Of a single person. You have the ability to

  Make waves that will touch shores you can’t

  Even imagine. Believe.

  ALSO BY CHEREE ALSOP

  The Haunted High Series-

  The Wolf Within Me

  The Ghost Files

  The Silver Series-

  Silver

  Black

  Crimson

  Violet

  Azure

  Hunter

  Silver Moon

  The Werewolf Academy Series-

  Book One: Strays

  Book Two: Hunted

  Book Three: Instinct

  Book Four: Taken

  Book Five: Lost

  Book Six: Vengeance

  Book Seven: Chosen

  Heart of the Wolf Part One

  Heart of the Wolf Part Two

  The Galdoni Series-

  Galdoni

  Galdoni 2: Into the Storm

  Galdoni 3: Out of Darkness

  The Small Town Superheroes Series-

  Small Town Superhero

  Small Town Superhero II

  Small Town Superhero III

  Keeper of the Wolves

  Stolen

  The Million Dollar Gift

  Thief Prince

  When Death Loved an Angel

  The Shadows Series

  Shadows- Book One in the World of Shadows

  Mist- Book Two in the World of Shadows

  The Monster Asylum Series

  Book One- The Fangs of Bloodhaven

  Book Two- The Scales of Drakenfall

  Girl from the Stars

  Book 1- Daybreak

  Book 2- Daylight

  Book 3- Day’s End

  Book 4- Day’s Journey

  Book 5- Day’s Hunt

  The Dr. Wolf Series

  Book 1- Shockwave

  Book 2- Demon Spiral

  Book 3- The Four Horsemen

  Book 4- Dragon’s Bayne

  The Pirate from the Stars

  The Prince of Ash and Blood

  Chapter One

  There was a split second between laughter and the sound of the car striking the cement bridge barrier. I gripped the steering wheel so hard I swore I felt it crack. The car pivoted upward and over the railing that was supposed to keep vehicles safe from the raging water below. I glanced in the rearview mirror and met Drake’s eyes. My brother’s gaze was filled with terror that no doubt reflected my own as we plummeted downward. A scream came from Sebastian in the passenger seat. I turned my head to look at him the same moment that the car hit the water.

  The force of the airbags deploying along with the crash of the car into the water struck so hard I blacked out. I came to at the sensation of icy water flowing past my knees.

  “Finn, help!” Drake shouted from the backseat.

  My seatbelt wouldn’t unlock. Panic surged through me as the water flowed higher. I struggled in my seat, but the button wouldn’t give. In a moment of desperation, I yanked at the seatbelt. The buckle popped and I was out.

  Sebastian’s head lolled forward. His arms dangled in the water that was now past his waist. I stared at the blood that trailed down his forehead.

  “Finn!” Drake’s panicked voice gave me focus. The rear of the car was beginning to sink lower than the front. He struggled, but couldn’t unlock the seatbelt.

  I climbed between the seats and grabbed Drake’s buckle. I jerked back and it broke free.

  “We need to get Sebastian out,” I told him.

  The terror in my brother’s eyes reminded me of one life-changing fact. Drake couldn’t swim.

  “Come on!” I shouted above the roar of the river. I put my shoulder against the door and shoved with all of my strength. It opened a crack. I pushed again and forced my shoulders into the opening. Putting my hands against the door frame and my back to the door, I pushed with all my might. The door opened grudgingly.

  An ice floe hit the door with a resounding thud. The icy bite of the water lapped at my waist.

  “Grab onto me,” I told my brother.

  He did so with wordless obedience. The fear on his face said he was moments from breaking down, then we would both be lost. If I was going to reach the shore and make it back for Sebastian, I had to act now. I gritted my teeth and pushed away from the car.

  I immediately realized why rescue swimmers held onto those they rescued instead of the other way around. In his panic, Drake climbed on top of me, pushing me deeper into the water. I struggled with the weight of my younger brother and the crush of the ice-filled water. My sneakers touched the bottom of the river. Adrenaline filled me. I pushed off and fought my way back to the top

  “Calm down!” I shouted at Drake. “You’re going to drown us both!”

  To my relief, he let me hook my arm around his shoulders the way I had seen in the movies. I kicked off the car and struggled through the water toward the shore. When my feet finally touched the ground, I shoved Drake ahead of me. He scrambled up the bank and pulled me with him. We both collapsed in the dirt.

  “The car!” Drake gasped.

  I shoved up to a sitting position just in time to see the car sink beneath the water.

  “Sebastian!” I shouted.

  “Finn, wait!” Drake said with terror in his voice.

  I jumped off the bank without looking back. The water was so cold it stole my breath and made my muscles seize. Ice floes battered against me. I could barely make out the hood of the car against the dark water. I dove beneath the surface. Drake’s door had shut. I pounded against it, but I couldn’t break through the glass. I hit the window again and again, but the water hindered my strength.

  My arms stopped responding to my commands and my paddling was no longer enough to keep me afloat. I tried to hold onto the car, but my frozen fingers couldn’t find a purchase. Exhaustion stole through my sluggish mind. I knew in that moment that I was going to drowned.

  “Finn!” I heard Drake shout weakly from the bank.

  I couldn’t let him down and I wouldn’t let Sebastian die, but I didn’t know what else I could possibly do. Hopelessness swarmed through my mind as black dots danced in my vision. My head sank beneath the water.

  My shoes touched the bottom of the river once more. The heartbreak that would be on my dad and Julianne’s face surfaced in my mind. Sebastian’s family would be devastated, and all because of a patch of ice on the bridge. It was my fault. I had to fix it.

  My body gave a jerk of protest at the air I wasn’t able to draw in. Panic filled me, but despite my flailing arms, I couldn’t find which way was up. My eyes closed against my will and my arms hung suspended in the water. The last bubble of air escaped from my mouth. Darkness filled my mind.

  Live. The word was a demand from something deep inside of me, a voice I didn’t know existed. It was mor
e of a guttural growl than a word, and the feeling that came with it had such insistence that something had to answer. And something did.

  An unfamiliar sensation welled up from deep inside my chest. My muscles tensed and pulled. My eyes flew open and my lips pulled back from my teeth at the pain, releasing the last precious breath of air I had. I doubled over, turning in the water as my joints pulled. A surge of agony jabbed through my skull with the force of a knife. I felt my clothes tear and my shoes slip away. I thought I would black out with the pain. I struggled not to pull in a breath. I was to the edge of what I could bear, and then it was gone.

  I didn’t have a chance to think about what had happened. My lungs screamed for air and the darkness stealing from the edges of my mind said I was out of time. I pushed off from the bottom of the river. It was easier to swim, but I couldn’t figure out why. I reached the car with measured strokes and surfaced to take a breath. My lungs felt fuller and the darkness of the night was tinged with white and gray as though someone shone a spotlight on us from above. Perhaps someone had heard the accident. Maybe help was coming. But Sebastian didn’t have time.

  I ducked beneath the water and slammed into the front windshield. It shattered beneath the force and the panes of glass drifted free in the water. I pushed my way inside the car. Sebastian’s head lolled forward, his eyes closed and mouth open. I reached for his seatbelt, and could only stare at the strange limb that had replaced my hand.

  I blinked at the sight of the paw of a huge dog where my fingers should have been. It made no sense whatsoever. I must have hit my head harder than I thought when the car slammed into the water. I scrabbled at the seatbelt, but the paw was useless without a thumb. Frustrated and panicking, I bent my head and bit at the belt. My teeth sliced through the fabric easier than a knife. Sebastian drifted upward toward the top of the car.

  Without hands, I had no other choice than to grab his shirt in my teeth. I yanked his body forward, forcing us both through the shattered windshield. I pushed off from my car toward the surface.

  The instant my head broke the surface, I gulped in air; but I didn’t hear the same response from Sebastian. My heart thundered in my ears. I grabbed his shirt again and pulled him toward the shore.

  “Finn, where are you?” Drake called; his eyes scanned the dark water desperately from the edge of the bank.

  I gave a muffled grunt when I neared the edge. It was the only sound I could force my throat to make. I saw Drake’s dark form startle at how close we were. I could barely keep my head above the surface. He saw me struggling with Sebastian and waded out to grab him. I followed them both to the edge of the river.

  Drake heaved Sebastian onto the side of the bank and knelt next to him. I pushed up as well. My legs shook as I fell onto the grass. I could barely force myself to crawl to Drake’s side.

  “Come on,” my younger brother was saying. Tears streamed down his face. He patted Sebastian’s cheek, but there was no response. The boy’s lips were blue and his partially-lidded eyes stared blankly past my brother. The sight of the blood that continued to drip down the side of his face gripped my heart in a tight fist.

  “Bast, please,” Drake pleaded.

  I took a shuddering breath, trying to come to terms with what had just happened.

  “He’s dead, Finn,” Drake sobbed. He turned to me and his eyes widened. He scooted back. “S-stay away from me,” he said, holding up his hands.

  I tried to tell him that I was his brother, but the only thing that came out was a low growl. Shocked, I backed up quickly as well. I saw my paws in the moonlight. A glance back showed a tail and hind legs. I couldn’t understand what was happening. Fear filled my limbs with ice colder than the water had been. I ducked into the trees behind me and ran.

  “Finn, where are you?” Drake’s trembling voice called behind me.

  I shuddered at the sight of the paws stretching out before me. I felt too close to the ground. The smells of the forest I ran through were overpowering. Some detached part of my brain catalogued them as I ran, rabbit, grouse, pond overgrown with cattails, the musk of an ermine, the heady scent of the needle-laden pine trees. I could tell the age of the rabbit by how much scent it left in its tracks. I knew that several fat trout lazed beneath the cattails. I also knew the ermine was out looking for a mate by the scent of her musk.

  I don’t know how I knew these things. None of it was familiar. Even the smell of the pine trees above me was different. I could tell one was rotting from beetles by the sweet tang in its scent. Another served as a home for a hearty family of squirrels. They stuck their heads out of the hole and chattered at me when I ran past. I ducked my head and loped on, as afraid of the things my nose revealed as by the way my body felt when I ran.

  My unfamiliar legs stretched out as if they enjoyed the motion. My lungs pumped, filling and letting out the air with anticipation for the next breath. I could feel the wind in the fur that covered my body, tangling through it as though a part of it. I easily leapt fallen logs and twisted around bushes with a grace that my human body could never have. The fact that the body I wore wasn’t human pushed at me relentlessly. The irony taunted at the back of my mind. In running from what I had become, the act of running revealed it to me. The harder I ran, the more futile my flight.

  I collapsed against a tree as the sun rose. I blinked my unfamiliar eyes at the landscape that turned from black, white, and gray, to every hue of gray imaginable and unimaginable. I hadn’t known such colors existed. As I lay there panting, I marveled at the beautiful shades of a leaf touched by the morning sun, the way the gray colors, for that was the only way I could describe them, shaded together with such perfection it stole my breath.

  I knew deep down that I was in shock, that my fascination with the leaf was merely my mind’s way of distracting me from what had happened. I wasn’t in a place to cope mentally with the accident, Sebastian’s death, or what had happened to me. Instead, I stared at the leaf, watching the shades charge with hues of light as the sun rose to its pinnacle and then descended with stark disinterest in what happened below.

  As night fell, strange stirrings started beneath my skin. My muscles felt as though they needed to stretch. My paws itched, and the long muzzle that had taken over my nose and mouth ached. I wanted to be back in the form I knew, in the body that was my own. I closed my eyes, took a deep breath, and felt myself begin to change once more.

  It didn’t hurt as badly as before, but the pulling and changing was uncomfortable. Within the space of a few minutes, I lay on my back in my familiar body, gasping to catch my breath. A tear leaked from my tightly shut eyes and trailed down my cheek. I hated feeling sorry for myself, but I had never felt so helpless in my life. I wiped the tear away and told myself I was angry instead, but even I wasn’t convinced.

  “Finn!”

  My dad’s shout carried along the gentle evening breeze. I pushed up to a sitting position.

  “Finn, where are you?”

  The desperation in his voice brought me to my feet. I glanced down and realized that I was completely naked. Shame filled me and I crouched, wrapping my arms around my knees. I wasn’t sure if I should let him find me, especially when I didn’t even know what I was. Maybe I was dangerous. Drake had certainly backed away fast enough. Perhaps I should leave and never return.

  The fact that I had nowhere to go kept me glued to the spot. I heard my dad walk closer and closer. As the sun faded away, the grays took over from the colors my eyes had seen. It was easier to make out objects in the darkness, but the reminder whispered that whatever had happened to me wasn’t over.

  “Finn, answer me, son!”

  The sweep of his flashlight through the trees neared the small grove where I waited. Though I couldn’t force myself to run, I found myself wishing that he would pass me by. Guilt that he had searched for so long warred with my fear of what had happened and my own part in it.

  The beam of light reached through the trees and swept past my face. My father
paused, then brought it back.

  “Finn?” he said in a voice just above a whisper. “Oh, thank goodness, Finn!” He ran into the clearing; the expectancy on his face broke my heart.

  I turned my head away and heard him slow.

  “Finn, everything’s going to be alright.”

  I shook my head. My voice broke when I said without looking at him, “Everything’s a disaster.”

  My dad paused a few steps behind me. I heard his feet shuffle in the dead leaves that littered the forest floor. “I brought you some clothes,” he finally said.

  Whatever power of thought I had left was caught by the statement. I glanced back at him. “What made you think I needed clothes?”

  Dad’s face lowered, but not before I saw the truth in his eyes. My heart skipped a beat. “You know what happened to me.”

  Dad nodded. He looked at me again and held up the backpack he carried. “Put these on. We can talk on the way back home.”

  “I shouldn’t go home,” I told him.

  He crossed to me with a look of understanding so stark in his gaze that I couldn’t turn away. “Where else would you go? We’re family.”

  I took the clothes and was inwardly grateful when he turned away to give me my privacy. I had to admit that pulling on the pants and shirt, and even the simple act of tying my old sneakers, made me feel more normal. The thought that my new sneakers now lay at the bottom of the river made me feel sick as more of a metaphor of my life than any regret for the sneakers themselves. They had always been a bit snug and the right one tended to squeak on the tile floors at school, negating the name sneaker.

  “Finn?”

  I shook my head to bring my thoughts back in order and glanced at Dad.

  “Let’s go home,” he said.

  “Sebastian’s dead.”

  A sigh lowered Dad’s shoulders. When he met my gaze, he looked as though my statement had aged him ten years. I realized at that moment how much of his calm demeanor had been forced for me. I wished I was still young enough to pretend with him.