Miz Scarlet and the Bewildered Bridegroom

by Barton, Sara M.

  “Now you’re just being silly!” she told me churlishly. “You know that’s not what I mean!”

  “What do you mean?” I softened my tone, playing good cop.

  “Well, maybe they’re manipulating people into wanting to get married.”

  “In that case, I’m surprised the Googins girls and Edna are still single. Heaven knows the three of them would probably kill to walk down the aisle again. In fact, I think the Queen of Clean would pay a small fortune to anyone who can get Big Larry to pop the question, especially during baseball season.”

  She gave me an ‘if looks could kill’ glare, so I gave her a moment to process her own conversation.

  “Well, when you put it that way, it does sound kind of ridiculous,” she admitted sheepishly.

  “The modern day version of a shotgun wedding,” I teased.

  “Only without the gun. Maybe they use fairy dust and magic potions,” she giggled, her sense of humor returning. We burst out laughing at the same time.

  “We’ve been under such a strain, Jenny, that we’re imagining things that go bump in the night. It would be foolish for anyone to try anything now, especially with the police taking such an interest in the case. The logical explanation is that Mark Pritchard is probably just looking to steer prospective brides and grooms Karin’s way. Maybe he’s got a contract with her or he gets a commission for each couple he brings to her. Or maybe he’s hoping we’ll start doing weddings and he’ll pick up some more business.”

  “When you put it that way, I guess there might be a logical explanation for his pushiness.” Those narrow shoulders twitched briefly, conceding the point. “I still don’t like him.”

  “Nor do I,” I had to admit. “But we can’t string him up just because we think he’s pushy.”

  “Maybe we could hire a couple of those cherubs to do it.”

  “Given the fact that Mark’s well over six feet and at least two hundred and fifty pounds, we’d need more than two,” I kidded.

  “Ten might do it,” she decided, “especially if they bring their bows and arrows.”

  “And on that note, it’s ‘back to reality’ time. We’re burning the few brain cells we have left on nonsense,” I informed her, my confidence renewed. “We’re seeing beasts in the shadows and conjuring up trolls with every odd noise. We need to come to our senses and force ourselves to think rationally.”

  “Okay, so what’s the rational explanation for what’s going on?” she wanted to know. I gave it some serious consideration. If someone else had been the victim on the receiving end of this cruel taunting, what would I have concluded?

  “Someone doesn’t want us to go into the wedding business, probably because we’re competition. The harassment seems to suggest that if we continue to do weddings, we’ll be punished for our efforts, with more sabotage.”

  “Does this mean the Pinault-Magnusdotter wedding is the first and last for the Four Acorns Inn?”

  Those beautiful eyes seemed to fill with disappointment as she stared at me. What was I going to tell her?

  “It’s just a matter of solving the mystery. Our biggest obstacle at the moment is the fact that we don’t know who is behind the effort. Once we nab the culprit, I see no reason why we can’t do weddings.”

  “Sounds like a plan.” She gave me a thumbs-up.

  “Good.” I leaned over to pat her knee and then turned my attention back to my laptop, ready to tackle the next issue for the Pinault-Magnusdotter wedding. “Until there’s actual evidence that Mark Pritchard is directly involved, we’ll just carry on.”

  “You’ll tell Kenny any way, won’t you...just to be on the safe side?” I saw that little flicker of doubt in her eyes. Maybe it wouldn’t hurt to tell him we had concerns. I was confident he’d at least consider the possibility that Mark and Karin were in cahoots.

  What was bothering me most? It was the bizarre nature of the case. The break-in and the punctured tires were scary enough on their own, but the homemade bomb at the front door made absolutely no sense to me. Were the quarter-sticks put there for the sheer pleasure of watching us squirm? Wouldn’t that seem to suggest that whoever was behind these attacks had a bird’s eye view of what went on inside the Four Acorns Inn? A bird’s eye view...did that include some way to monitor our movements, our conversations, our activities?

  Or had someone done some research on the Four Acorns Inn? Did they know about my unfortunate romance with Ned Sorkin and his hidden history as an environmental saboteur? Long before I had learned about Ned’s true motive in seducing me, we Wilsons had been targeted in an ugly plot to ruin us. Were we supposed to believe this new violence was some kind of revenge for putting Ned and his half-brother, Jere, in prison? Had they hired Karin to finish the job? The moment that thought crossed my mind, I banished it. I was just being silly, worrying about nothing, I told myself. After all, Ned hadn’t just gone after the Wilsons; we weren’t his only victims. He’d kidnapped the entire Jordan family in order to get his hands on Jim Jordan’s computer hacking expertise, so that he could carry out his evil plot.

  There was another possibility, though, one that made a little more sense to me. Karin might be using Ned’s violent history to camouflage her campaign of harassment to knock the Four Acorns Inn out of the wedding game. Was she vicious enough to do that? I’d met her just a handful of times. Sure, she’d been involved with Seth Von Bethen, the Mediquick Air Ambulance CEO, and that involvement had resulted in divorce proceedings when his wife caught them up at Wallace’s mansion. No doubt Seth was facing a significant financial hit, given Amber was leaving their marriage of seventeen years with half the community property. But what did that have to do with the party planner harassing us?

  “Maybe Karin wants to buy Wallace’s mansion, but she doesn’t want to pay the current fair market value,” I said aloud, more to myself than to Jenny. “Maybe she’s hoping that if we’re all scared that we’re being threatened again, we’ll put both houses on the market, flee Cheswick, and she can snap them up for a song.”

  Had she counted on Seth to invest in her company and back her efforts to buy Wallace’s mansion? What if that divorce had actually ruined her plans, because Seth no longer had as much disposable income?

  “Now it sounds like you’re the one who’s letting your imagination run away with you,” the teenager remarked, as she watched me with concern. Maybe she was right. Maybe we were making a mountain out of a mole hill by assuming that someone wanted to cause us real harm.

  “I’m sure we’re just being a couple of Nervous Nellies, Jen. We’re spooking ourselves. You’ll see. There’s nothing to worry about. We’ll find out this is all just some idiot’s idea of a funny prank.”

  Now that tiny voice inside me was screaming, struggling to be heard: I said, “Danger, Will Robinson!” What’s wrong with you? Do you think you’re invincible?

  And then it hit me. As easily as one’s imagination can run wild, it can also run away from the truth. What if the M-80 explosives weren’t as harmless as we thought? We never had the chance to find out because Dave Wilkie was caught in the act.

  What if the next incident proves to be more dangerous... or even deadly? What will we do if all this madness escalates?

  “Are you okay?”

  I looked up to see my teenage assistant staring at me. Running a frazzled hand through my hair, I came up with a quick excuse to explain my sudden urge to hop up out of my chair and head into the kitchen. I needed time to think. “I forgot to thaw the spinach for my tiny quiches.”

  “Is that all? I thought there was something wrong.”

  “Something is if I don’t have an appetizer for the cocktail hour.”

  “Want me to help?”

  “Actually, could you do me a huge favor and run to the store for....” My mind went blank. What could I use? “Batteries.”

  “Batteries?” Her eyebrows shot up. “Um, sure. I guess so. What size?”

  “D,” I replied. “I want to make sure all the f
lashlights in the guest rooms work, just in case we have a power failure.”

  I sent her off with a twenty dollar bill and a coupon. The moment she was out the door, I was on the phone to Kenny.

  “Hey, do you have a moment?” I asked.

  “Just barely, Scarlet. What’s the problem?”

  “Is there some way that people can tap into our security system?”

  “Say what?”

  “Can someone access our security system remotely and use it to watch us?”

  “I suppose it’s possible, but I find it unlikely that anyone would use....”

  I interrupted him, my words spilling out like a faucet that won’t turn off. “Kenny, what if someone knows how to time these incidents because he’s watching us through your cameras?”

  “Whoa!” He sounded shocked. “What brought this on?”

  “I don’t know,” I confessed. “Call it a feeling. Call it deductive reasoning. All I know is that the only reason that front door didn’t blow up was because I woke up and came downstairs in time. If I hadn’t, that detonator would have worked and the explosion would have created absolute chaos at the Four Acorns Inn.”

  “But it didn’t happen that way, Scarlet,” he said calmly.

  “But it could have,” was my nervous reply. “What if we’re looking at the possibility of incidents that are going to escalate? Maybe it was only pure luck that prevented the quarter-sticks from going off.”

  “But the point is that they didn’t blow.”

  “But they could have. What about the vandalism of the White Oak Room?”

  “What about it?”

  “Why were they so confident they’d get away with it? They were in disguise. It was just dumb luck I recognized Neil Kradic.”

  “Where are you going with this, honey?”

  “These bad things are happening, Kenny, and we’re only stopping them coincidentally. We’re stumbling into the situation in the nick of time.”

  “I’ll take it any way I can.”

  “But you’re missing the big picture! You bring in Ruth and Edna as guests. What happens? The trouble goes away, even though Max and Larry aren’t hanging out at the inn. It’s like we’re being watched from the inside now and the bad guy is just waiting for them to leave. It’s like someone is...is...casing the joint.”

  “But I’ve got surveillance cameras trained on the inn, Scarlet. No one can come or go without the action being picked up on camera.”

  “And ever since you turned them on, there’s been no trouble. So, I’ll ask again, Kenny. Is there some way someone could tap into the system?”

  There was a subtle change, just a hint of concern that crept into his reply, but I heard it all the same. “The system is state-of-the-art, babe. There’s no way someone could tap into the system to watch the Four Acorns Inn. But....”

  “But what?”

  “Maybe they’re not tapping into the system. Maybe they’re watching the system.”

  “I don’t understand.”

  “I have it hooked up to Bur’s big screen TV. I’ve been parking my carcass on the sofa to watch the monitors on a split screen,” Kenny replied somewhat sheepishly. It was his admission that he made a professional mistake. “It never occurred to me to pull the drapes.”

  I considered my brother’s second-floor accommodation with the large picture window. The carriage house sat on the edge of the pond behind the Four Acorns Inn, and beyond the pond was a tree-covered hill, part of the nature preserve open to the public; for someone with a pair of binoculars, it served as the perfect vantage point for spying on us.

  “You think that means someone is watching from the woods?”

  “That would explain how folks know when to attack. They’re watching my team watch your back.”

  “How would you test your theory?” I inquired, feeling a little less apprehensive now that Kenny was taking me seriously. Maybe we could beat the bad guys at their own game.

  “I think I’ll run a loop tape on the big TV and see if I can set a trap, Scarlet.”

  “That sounds complicated,” was my answer.

  “We might as well take advantage of the opportunity. I’ll set things up with Max. Don’t worry, honey. We’ll make sure we’ve got you covered.”

  “Thanks. I feel better knowing you’re on the case. There’s just one thing. If whoever is spying on us knows you’re watching the action from Bur’s apartment, wouldn’t it be better to just pack up and let them see you leave?”

  “Au contraire,” he countered. “If we pull out, they’ll get nervous and think we might be onto them. But if we leave the current security in place and tweak it to make them feel safe, they won’t look for the real eyes and ears.”

  “You’re going to con the watcher into thinking he’s on top of things?”

  “Exactly. I want him to show himself. What good is it for us to catch the hirelings? We want the brains behind this scheme.”

  Chapter Eighteen --

  “Scheme,” I repeated. “That’s what Jenny called it. I thought she was just overreacting.”

  “The kid has a good head on her shoulders, Scar. Her instincts are spot on, even when her imagination tries to fill in the blanks and gets carried away. She reminds me of you as a teenager.”

  “You think so?” I was taken aback. This was the first time he had mentioned a resemblance between me and my assistant. “In what way does she remind you of me?”

  “She just can’t help herself. She’s naturally curious and whenever she thinks something is going on, she can’t mind her own beeswax to save her life. She just charges into the fray.”

  “And that’s how you see me, a raving butt-in-ski who sticks her nose where it doesn’t belong?” I was feeling attacked. That kind of comment was likely to get Kenny’s fanny kicked.

  “I do. It’s one of the many reasons I love you,” he laughed heartily, not bothering to hide his amusement. “Need I remind you you’re the reason that Jenny is still alive, Miz Scarlet? Your adamant refusal to leave her in New Jersey when she was in danger, even though folks thought you should, spoke volumes about your character. Look at her now. She’s no longer an endangered runaway. She has family and friends who care. She’s going to college. None of that would have happened if you had minded your own business and turned a blind eye to her plight. You didn’t quit on her. You stood by her.”

  “Well,” I took a deep breath, surprised at the sweet words of praise, “since you put it that way....”

  “I’ve got a meeting in Avon with a client. I’ll call you later.”

  “Bye.”

  Kenny was as good as his word. He and Max set up a second monitor, this time up in the small attic storage closet off the sitting room I shared with Jenny. Ruth sat up there during the day, keeping an eye on the action in real time. She had our phone numbers programmed into a emergency alert program and could call us at the drop of a hat with a warning if anything seemed suspicious. Meanwhile, Max took the previously filmed security footage and spliced it together carefully. He ran it on my brother’s big screen TV in the carriage house. Once he had it done, he gave us wardrobe instructions every morning, making sure we wore clothing that was similar enough to what was showing on the security loop that day.

  On Friday, my mother accompanied Dr. Van Zandt to the cancer center for some more tests, and then to the Wadsworth Museum for lunch in the cafe, followed by a tour. They were gone for much of the day. Lacey had an exercise class and lunch with friends. Ruth and Edna finally had some time to get to know each other.

  I served them lunch on the sun porch. Ruth had her tablet propped up as she ate and conversed; she kept one eye on it, monitoring the video feed for any signs of intrusion.

  “Here are your Cobb salads, ladies. Enjoy.” I set their plates down in front of them and returned a moment later with freshly baked corn muffins and butter.

  “It looks delicious, Scarlet.” Ruth was already stabbing a tender piece of romaine with her fork.

&nb
sp; “Indeed,” Edna agreed. I grabbed the pitcher of ice tea and refilled their glasses. “I just wanted you to know I’m leaving with Ruth tomorrow, Scarlet. She’s invited me to stay with her up in Boston for the weekend.”

  I admit it. I did a double-take. “Boston?”

  “Yes.”

  “Oh. What will you two be doing?”

  “We’ll see the sights and maybe take in a concert at the Esplanade,” Ruth informed me.

  “Huh. Gee, maybe you could call Big Larry while you’re up there.” I gave Edna a sideways glance. Wait for it....Wait for it...Wait....

  “I might. It depends on whether I’ve got time.”

  “Right.” It took all my willpower to wipe that smirk off my face. Edna had decided to play it cool, so I followed her lead. “He’s probably too busy anyway. The Red Sox might be on the road.”

  “No, they’re not,” she corrected me. “They’re playing Tampa Bay all weekend long.”

  “Are they?” I asked, forcing myself to look innocent. I could see the corners of Ruth’s mouth twitching as she resisted a smile. “That’s good to know. How did you find that out?”

  “Ruth’s a season ticket holder and she thought I might like to go to a game or two.”

  “Well, if you do, I hope you have a chance to hook up with Big Larry. It would be a shame to waste the trip and not at least have a couple of minutes to say hi.”

  “I might,” she replied nonchalantly, “if there’s time.”

  She turned and gazed out into the garden. Ruth and I exchanged glances; this time neither one of us could resist a grin.

  “I’ll be in the kitchen if you two need anything.” I left them to their travel plans and went back to the kitchen. Since all of our guests would check out and return to their respective homes on Saturday morning, I got to work on our farewell barbecue. I started by marinating the shrimp and then I moved on to the corn on the cob. Peeling back the husks, I stripped the silk away, bundled the remains, and put them into the refrigerator to chill. Bur would have to soak them before they went on the grill. Next on my to-do list was making dessert. I gathered the ingredients for peach pie. I tossed flour, butter, water, salt, and a couple tablespoons of oil into the Cuisinart, following the recipe for Julia Child’s food processor pie crust. Once the dough came together, I wrapped it in plastic wrap and refrigerated it. With peeler in hand, it was time to tackle the peaches.