Moon Grieved (Mirror Lake Wolves Book 5)

by Jennifer Snyder

  Dorian had been bandaged up good enough by the time we brought Tate and the others to Gran. She had had a long night mending everyone, but it wasn’t anything she couldn’t handle. Gracie had woke and helped as much as she could, and Violet had stayed to help too. Tate would be okay, but his injuries would take his wolf longer to heal than some of the others.

  The scent of burgers grilling made its way to my nose as I stepped out of the woods and into the trailer park. I followed my nose until I spotted a large table in front of the party building. The Bell sisters stood behind it with drunken grins plastered on their withered with age faces. I wondered how many of their special drinks they’d had today.

  In front of them was a tasty-looking buffet. Sheila stood beside the old women, filling a plastic bowl with chips. Dorian was nowhere to be seen. I imagined she had him laid up in their trailer, healing even though I was sure he was probably feeling much better.

  “What’s all this?” Eli asked when we neared the sisters and Sheila.

  “A way to say thank you for what y’all are out there doing,” Sheila insisted. She wiped her hands on a napkin and passed Eli a paper plate. “There’s more than enough food here, so take what you want. We’ve got Philly cheesesteaks, hot dogs, and cheeseburgers.”

  As soon as she said hot dogs and cheeseburgers, I spotted my dad off to the side, manning the grill. It was good to see he’d found himself a place in all of this. A way to help. I knew it was important to him.

  When we returned to the trailer park last night, I’d been unable to sleep and had slipped outside to gaze at the stars. I’d spotted him in front of Gran’s with a bottle of whiskey in hand. He hadn’t opened it, but it was clear from the look on his face he’d been in a dark enough place to. I was sure it was because the conversation between him and Mom earlier had made him feel worthless, even if that hadn’t been Mom’s intention.

  When he slipped the bottle back into the bushes and headed inside the tension in my muscles melted away, but the pain in my heart lingered.

  “Hey, sweetheart,” he said when he noticed me staring at him. “Hot dog or cheeseburger?”

  I shook my head. “No, I think I’ll have a Philly cheesesteak.”

  “Suit yourself.” He grinned.

  A wide smile stretched across my face as he whistled to himself while continuing to flip burgers. I was glad he’d found something to busy himself with. He needed a purpose within the pack. Something to feel proud of himself for.

  Manning the grill today was a good place to start.

  “Everything looks delicious,” Eli insisted as he glanced at the food covering the table.

  “Oh, good,” Violet said as she walked toward us carrying a case of water. “You finally came back. I was getting ready to send a text and let you know the food was ready.”

  “I think my subconscious knew there was something waiting,” Max insisted as he took a paper plate from Sheila and reached for one of my Dad’s cheeseburgers.

  I accepted a plate from the oldest Bell sister and piled on barbecue chips before reaching for a Philly. I noticed Mom grab a plate and a hamburger bun before she headed to Dad at the grill.

  “Are these your famous cheeseburgers?” she asked as she placed a kiss on his cheek.

  “They are.” He placed a burger on her bun and grinned.

  I’d forgotten how much he enjoyed cooking. It had always been a passion of his. Something he had learned from Gran for sure. I remembered them taking turns cooking dinner during the week when I was little. Mom never cooked. I wasn’t sure if it was because she didn’t enjoy it, or if she didn’t know how.

  “I’ve missed your cheeseburgers,” Mom insisted.

  “I’ve missed cooking them.” Dad flipped a burger high in the air and caught it on the spatula before placing it back on the grate of the hot grill. “I’d forgotten how much I enjoyed it.”

  “You used to love cooking. I’m surprised you put away your spatula for so long,” Mom insisted as she squirted ketchup on the top part of her bun.

  “I was in a dark place,” he said without looking up from the grill.

  I wondered if he was remembering last night and how he’d almost allowed himself to return to that dark place again. I hadn’t mentioned anything to anyone about what I’d seen, not even Eli, because I felt it wasn’t my secret to share.

  Dad was happier today. Maybe it was because he was cooking, or maybe it was because he’d fought an old demon and won.

  Either way, I was glad to see him smile.

  Once I made my plate, I stepped to where Eli stood and ate. Gran came into view, followed by Gracie. It was odd to see her not with Cooper. From the basket Gracie was carrying, I knew she was helping Gran tend to the pack members who’d been injured in last night’s epic battle again. I was glad to see her spend time with Gran, even if it was for something so horrible.

  “Did you get another one today?” a soft voice asked, jarring me from my thoughts.

  Jonas had come out of nowhere. He looked up at Eli, begging him to say yes.

  Eli shook his head. “No. We’ll get another one soon though. Trust me.”

  “I do.” Jonas smiled.

  Eli ruffled Jonas’s hair. “Good. Did you get something to eat?”

  “I had a hot dog.”

  “What? No chips?” Eli teased.

  “I wasn’t really that hungry,” Jonas said with a shrug.

  “I know barbecue chips are your favorite. There were some over there.” Eli pointed to where the youngest Bell sister was dishing out giant handfuls of them. “Better get some before Ms. Bell passes them all out.”

  “Here, you can have some of mine.” I grabbed a handful and held them out to him. “I got too many. I won’t be able to eat them all.”

  “Thanks,” he said as he grabbed them from me.

  He crunched on one as he walked back to his trailer. The windows were dark, as though the trailer was in mourning. It had me thinking of June.

  “How’s your mom?” I asked Eli, knowing he’d taken a moment to check on her this morning before we began patrol.

  “She’s doing okay,” Eli said before he took a bite of his Philly. “She’s supposed to go to the funeral home tomorrow morning to pick up my Dad’s ashes. It’s got her all shook up.”

  His voice was cold and unfeeling as though he wasn’t truly processing the words he was saying. In fact, I wasn’t sure he’d processed his father’s death at all yet.

  “I’m sure,” I said. “Does she need anyone to give her a ride? If so, I’d be glad to.”

  I still felt bad for not visiting with her sooner than I had.

  Eli glanced at me, his bright green eyes glittered in the sunlight. “I love you.”

  “I love you too,” I said, not understanding where his sudden declaration came from.

  “You care so much about everyone in this pack.”

  I shrugged. “Doesn’t everyone? We’re family.”

  “Not as much as you,” Eli insisted. “No. Mom doesn’t need you to give her a ride because I’m taking her. I feel like I should, you know? I need to be there for her.” His voice shook when he spoke, and I was glad to see an emotion besides anger surrounding his father’s death trickle through him.

  “I think it’s great you’re taking her.”

  “Thanks.” Eli wiped his mouth with his napkin. “I’m thinking about making all of my brothers come. It’s something we should do as a whole family.”

  “That’s a good idea.” I smiled. “I’ll probably give Ridley a call in the morning while you’re with your family to touch base and make sure the witches are still on track in putting up that ward.”

  Eli pulled me into him and placed to sloppy kiss against my lips. “Beautiful, compassionate, and brilliant. How the hell did I get so lucky?”

  “Oh, whatever,” I said as I playfully slapped him away.

  He grinned, and I felt like I’d won the lottery. The last few days Eli had turned into a hard, cold version of himsel
f with everything that had happened, a version I didn’t recognize. I knew it was because he was dealing with a lot, and I hated to see him seem so cold.

  This smile, though. It was golden.

  20

  The full moon hung brightly in the sky. I wanted so badly to head out to the lake and meditate, but I knew the woods weren’t someplace to go alone, more so now than ever.

  Instead, I settled for a patch of grass between our trailer and Glenn and Taryn’s. It wasn’t ideal, but it was better than nothing.

  I pulled in a deep breath for a count of one, and then exhaled for a count of three. After a few breaths, the tension in my shoulders eased, and my muscles relaxed as I soaked in the beautiful moon goddess’s rays of light. Today had been difficult, but I knew tonight would be even worse. It would be emotional and heavy because tonight we said goodbye to our alpha.

  Sadness crept through me. It was the deeply rooted kind, the kind you knew without a shadow of a doubt you wouldn’t be able to shake free from no matter how hard you tried.

  I lifted my face to the moon and closed my eyes, sending a silent prayer to the moon goddess, asking that she help me make it through the night, that she help all of us.

  My cell rang, jolting me out of my thoughts.

  I rushed to answer it, thinking it might be Ridley. She was supposed to call once her family had been able to set the ward in place. I hoped that was what she was calling me for now. I could use some good news.

  “Hey,” I answered.

  “Hey. I hope I’m not bothering you,” she said. “I just wanted to let you know we got the ward up.”

  “That’s great. Thanks so much for letting me know. I think the news will have everyone resting a little easier tonight.”

  “There was a little difficulty though,” Ridley said. “Something seemed to be fighting us.”

  My stomach somersaulted. “What do you mean?”

  “Just that it should’ve been easier to set the ward in place than it was.”

  “What would cause issues? Could it be because there are more vampires in town than we anticipated?” I chewed my bottom lip.

  “Not necessarily,” Ridley insisted. “My aunt thinks there was some kind of magic at play. Something attached to the vampires.”

  The Sire Brand.

  Shit. I’d completely forgotten about it. Since so much chaos had taken place between the last time anyone from the pack talked with the Caraway witches, I was positive they hadn’t been informed of the new information about the vampires.

  They had never been told about the Sire Brand.

  It had slipped my mind the other day when I talked to Ridley, asking for an update.

  “There was something called a Sire Brand attached to the vampire we killed in the woods,” I said. “I’m sorry we forgot to mention it to you with everything going on.”

  “A Sire Brand? Like a special bond between a vampire and their maker?”

  “No. This was explained to me as something more like a branding. Julian found it on the vampire we took out. She was part of the Midnight Reaper group, and she was vicious as hell. She had a crazy power where she could wield invisible razor blades. She managed to slice up a few of our pack members before we took her down.”

  “I’m glad you took one of them out, but did Julian happen to say what the Sire Brand was for? Or what it does?” Fear registered in her voice. “If it is too powerful, the ward we placed might not work. Just because it’s up, doesn’t mean it’s strong enough to fight against something like that.”

  “Julian said it’s a magical mark that makes vampires become compelled to do whatever the vampire who branded them wants. Basically, the vampire in charge doesn’t have to share the ability of compulsion, all they have to know is a special rune. Once they have it on a vampire they want with the intent of them doing something for them, that vampire remains under their control until they die.” I hoped that was everything Julian had mentioned about the strange mark. “Apparently, it’s an ancient mark he hasn’t seen in a long time.”

  “Damn it,” Ridley whispered into the phone. I wasn’t positive, but I was pretty sure it was the first time I’d ever heard her cuss. “The ward we put up might not stay in place. I’ll have to talk to my aunt about this and get back to you. Julian said it was a magical rune, right?”

  “Yeah. One from the middle ages.”

  “Hmm. I wonder if my aunt knows anything about it. If she does, we might be able to tweak the ward. If not...well, who knows what we’ll be able to do to help the situation.” Her voice lacked confidence, which had my stomach twisting into knots.

  “I’ll call you back later. If it happens to be too late, then I’ll call you tomorrow. I know your pack is dealing with a lot tonight, and I don’t want to bother you,” Ridley said.

  “Thanks.” I licked my lips. “I’m not going to mention this to Eli. Not tonight. You’re right, my pack is going through enough tonight. No one needs this added to their plate, especially not Eli. Please make sure your aunt doesn’t contact him about this.”

  “I will. Why don’t I go ahead and say I’ll call you tomorrow instead of later tonight? I need time to look in to things and so will my aunt,” Ridley said. The knots in my stomach began to unwind. It was nice to know Ridley was taking care of this for me, for us. “I really am sorry for your pack’s loss. For Eli’s and his family. Please let him know I’ll be thinking of him tonight.”

  “I will,” I said before I hung up.

  A long breath expelled from my lips as I stood and crammed my cell into my back pocket. When I stepped inside the trailer, Eli was sprawled across the couch with Moonshine on his chest. A TV show played on low in the background, but Eli wasn’t looking at the screen. His gaze was fixed on the ceiling fan, watching as it spun.

  “Hey.” I closed the front door behind me. “Are you okay?”

  “Not really,” Eli said. Pain reflected in his tone.

  I moved to the couch where he lay and positioned myself on the edge of the coffee table. My heart pounded. I didn’t know what to say because I’d never had a parent die. I’d had one disappear for a few years, but this wasn’t the same. It wasn’t even close.

  “Do you want to talk about it?” I asked, my gaze never wavering from him.

  “My mind is going in circles. I can’t believe we’re saying goodbye to my dad tonight.” His voice cracked when he spoke. “I really thought I’d have more time with him.”

  I stared at him, watching as his brows furrowed while he became lost in his thoughts. Was he thinking of the things he always thought they’d do together? Was he remembering past memories the two of them shared?

  “I've been trying to remember what the last thing I said to him was,” he said. “I know it wasn’t what I wanted my last words to be to him.”

  “Say those words tonight,” I suggested in a soft voice.

  Eli swallowed hard. “I don’t know what I’ll say tonight.” He smoothed a hand over his face and released a long exhale.

  Tears swelled in my eyes as I stared at him. I couldn’t imagine the pain he was feeling. Same as I couldn’t imagine one of my parents dying suddenly and me not being able to say goodbye.

  “I didn’t think I’d have to step up as alpha so soon. I thought I had years before that responsibility fell to my shoulders.”

  I placed a hand on his forearm. “I know. I’m here for you, though. You’re going to make it through this. We’re in this together.”

  The ghost of a smile twitched at the corners of his lips as his gaze shifted to me. “I know, and I love you for sticking with me,” Eli said. “I just hope I can be half the alpha my dad was.”

  “You’ll do fine. I’m sure he’s already proud of everything you’ve accomplished the last couple of days.”

  “Maybe.” Eli’s stare drifted back to the ceiling fan. “I don’t want to let anyone down. I’m worried I might not be as good of an alpha as he was to our pack, that I might not be able to handle the responsibility wel
l enough. What if I screw up?”

  “I’d say those are pretty damn normal fears to have.” The words flew from my mouth without thought. They weren’t anything Eli had expected me to say, but maybe that’s why they brought a smile to his face when I didn’t think it was possible.

  Eli’s lips formed a small smirk. “Pretty damn normal, huh?” he repeated.

  “Well, yeah. I’m sure when your dad first became alpha he worried he’d screw up too. That’s normal. It’s also normal to screw up. I’m sure your dad did at one point or another while being alpha. It’s what people do. We make mistakes. Nobody’s perfect. And the honest truth is, no one expects you to be either.”

  “Have I told you how much I love you?”

  I laughed. “You have, but I’m always willing to hear it again.”

  “I love you, Mina Ryan,” Eli said. “And there’s no way in hell I’d be able to make it through this without you.”

  I leaned in and pressed my lips to his. “I love you too.”

  “Lie with us,” he insisted as he moved over on the couch. Moonshine huffed and readjusted herself on his chest as though she were pissed with the movement. “Don’t mind her. There’s plenty of room,” he said as he stroked behind her ears.

  I snuggled into his side, grateful he was in a place where he wanted me close again. Closing my eyes, I pushed everything from my mind and focused on giving Eli all of my love because he was so damn deserving.

  21

  Eli’s mom led the pack through the woods toward the lake. Everyone carried a paper lantern as we followed. The area had been searched minutes before by Dorian, who had healed up nicely, and a few other members of the pack.

  It was sad we had to look for the Midnight Reaper group of vampires before we could say goodbye with a traditional ceremony to our beloved alpha.

  My wolf howled in mourning once we reached the lake, and June spun to face us. A glass jar containing the ashes of Eli’s dad glinted in the moonlight. Jonas, Micha, Cooper, and Tate, who still was a little cut up, flanked one side of June while Eli flanked the other. My gaze traveled over their faces, unable to linger long because the sight of their pain hurt me too badly.