Far Country

by Malone, Karen

  Suddenly she heard Steve’s voice only a few feet above her. “Don’t stop now,” he said quietly. “You’re nearly there.”

  Deborah dug her fingers into a tiny crack and pushed up with her toes. Her left hand found another questionable grip. She wedged her right foot into a crevice and pushed up again, breathing hard.

  “Good. Give me your hand.” Deborah reached up with her right hand and felt an immense relief as Steve’s strong fingers closed over her wrist. “Bring your right foot up to that nub,” he coached. Carefully she felt around with her foot until she found the perch.

  “Okay, you’ve got it!” Steve encouraged her, pulling her up gently. With a heave, Deborah lifted herself to the ledge and scrambled back several feet before collapsing just outside of the cave mouth. Steve sat beside her, grinning admiringly. “I can’t believe you actually followed me,” he said.

  Deb shook her head. “Neither - can I,” she gasped. “That – was – insane.”

  Steve laughed. “If you think that was insane, wait until we try going back down!”

  Deborah flexed her aching fingers and frowned ruefully. “Is it much worse?”

  Steve shrugged. “I don’t know,” he admitted. “I’ve never made it all the way up before.”

  Deborah’s eyebrows shot up in surprise. “You’re kidding.”

  Steve shook his head. “Nope. I know Jill is afraid of heights. I was only planning to go high enough to get her to give up”

  Deb sat up, bewildered. “So why’d you climb all the way up today?”

  Steve gave her a lopsided smile. “Because you kept following me.”

  She made a face. “Smart,” she said sarcastically.

  He nodded. “I thought so, too. But we’re here now- might as well check out the cave.” He stood and held out a hand to help her up. Deborah allowed him to pull her to her feet and turned to look around. The mouth of the cave was wide enough to stand in, almost. It went back into the cliff about fifteen feet. The floor of the cave was a fine grained dirt. A few boulders and bare grayish-white ledges led to the rear of the cave. Several mud dauber nests dotted the roof, but that was about all there was to see. They stared at it for about thirty seconds in disappointment.

  “Well, that was fun,” Deborah said drily. “Guess we should start back down now.”

  Steve nodded in agreement. He turned, and then flinched as lightning flashed nearly overhead. Deb and Steve stared in awe at the impressive line of thunderheads looming above the tree line.

  “That came up fast!” Deborah exclaimed. “We’d better hurry if we’re gonna get down to the others...” Thunder cracked in their ears and fat drops of rain spattered the ground around them.

  “I don’t think we’re going anywhere for awhile,” Steve replied grimly. He turned, peering down to the water. He could see that the group was already clambering up the far bank and heading to a screened in covered picnic shelter. Pete turned and waved, then mouthed the word ‘wait there’ when he saw Steve and Deborah looking down at them. The rain was already falling harder, soaking their partially dried t-shirts and hair.

  “He’s right. Let’s get inside the cave,” Steve said. “This probably won’t last long.” Deb nodded and they ducked inside. They watched as the sky darkened quickly, and the wind whipped the trees around the river. Eventually, they sat down across from each other just inside the mouth, absorbed in watching the light show just outside.

  Wet from the river as well as the rain, Deborah shivered and wrapped her arms around her legs for warmth. Steve eyed her uncomfortably. He was shivering as well.

  “Look,” he said at last. “Come over here and sit with me. Two of us together have got to be a bit warmer.”

  Deb nodded, feeling strangely shy suddenly. She sat between Steve’s legs and leaned stiffly against his chest. He wrapped his arms around her, feeling just as awkward while the storm continued its rampage outside. Slowly, heat began to return to their clammy skin. Deborah relaxed and leaned more comfortably against Steve’s chest as his arms seemed to draw her even closer. His chin rested lightly on the top of her head. This is rather nice, she reflected drowsily.

  Fifteen minutes dragged by, then ten more. The thunder storm passed by fairly quickly, but the rain showed no signs of letting up. Relaxed now inside the cradle of Steve’s arms, her eyes drooped. After awhile, Deborah drifted off to sleep.

  Steve stared out at the sheets of rain. It was coming down so heavily it obscured even the edge of the ledge outside the cave. He was alone in the world with a beautiful redhead sleeping trustingly in his arms, and he liked the way it felt.

  “I’m tired of being alone,” he whispered. Deborah stirred at the sound of his voice. He shifted slightly, seeking a more comfortable position against the rough rock wall. Steve thought about what Reverend Graham had said about getting on with his life. Was that what he should do? Even thinking about it caused Steve’s heart to twist in guilt. Yet sitting here, holding Deborah, feeling her warmth, recalling her smile, or the light touch of her hand on his arm…even the steady rhythm of her breathing as she slept in his arms…it all felt so right! But then, why did he feel so guilty?

  Because of you, Sarah will never have a chance to have moments like this. You took that from her! The accusation pounded in his brain, and it was the truth. There was no denying what his carelessness had cost her, and him. Steve sighed in frustration. The truth was he might never be free of his guilt. As long as Sarah ‘lived’ in coma he would never be truly free to love someone else.

  For a moment, Steve’s arms tightened around Deborah, and he savored the feel of her. If ever he could learn to love someone else again, it would be someone like Deborah.

  Steve stared out at the rain for a while longer. It showed no sign of letting up. Soon, his head drooped forward, and he too, fell asleep.

  When he awoke sometime later, he found that he had fallen over onto his left side, but Deborah still remained cradled in his arms. He lifted his head to look outside. The rain had stopped at last, and the sun was casting long shadows. It must be close to 8:00!

  He looked down at Deborah, to find her gazing up at him with a bemused expression in her sleepy green eyes. Steve’s heart skipped a beat. She really was beautiful.

  “How long have I been sleeping?” She asked.

  “Hard to say, maybe a couple of hours. I was out, too,” he admitted.

  Her eyes widened. “Then it will be dark soon! Do we have time to get down safely?”

  “Hope so. Unless you’d like to spend the night up here and try it in the morning?” He asked.

  Deborah smiled softly. “Tempting,” she replied. “The view is nice but the bed is kind of hard.” She pushed herself into a sitting position.

  Steve winced at the pain in his shoulder as he tried to sit up. “Tell me about it!” He agreed as he tried to brush the imbedded gravel off of the left side of his body. He stood and pulled Deborah to her feet. She wobbled and leaned against him for support. “My leg’s gone numb!” She moaned as the unpleasant tingle of returning blood flow spread through her feet.

  Steve tightened his grip around her waist to support her, secretly savoring again at how good it felt to hold her close… Deborah glanced up at him through her lashes and Steve’s heart seemed to stop.

  For a moment their eyes held. Without quite knowing how it happened, Steve found his lips touching hers. Deborah remained perfectly still in his arms, allowing the hesitant caress to continue at Steve’s pace. Slowly, the kiss deepened and Deborah responded with restrained pleasure. After a moment, Steve rested his forehead on hers and laughed shakily. “Wow, I hadn’t planned for that to happen.”

  Deborah smiled, a soft light in her green eyes. “S’Okay. I like surprises.” Sensing that things were about to get awkward, she stretched on tip toe and kissed him on the nose, then gently pulled away. “But I think we need to hold that thought until we are down from the cave and back at the camp. It’s going to be dark by the time we make it back to the
store.”

  Steve grinned sheepishly and looked around. “I kind of forgot where we were.”

  Letting her go, he stepped to the mouth of the cave and waved at the rest of the group, who were sitting inside the picnic shelter on the far bank still. Steve could make out Chuck, stretched out on one of the tables. He appeared to be asleep. He saw Jill reach across the table and shake him back to consciousness. He could read her sour expression even from here. If she had been trying to get Chuck to pay her more attention, it clearly hadn’t worked.

  Steve and Deborah made a slow decent over the slippery rocks and breathed a sigh of relief when they finally reached the bottom. The little cliff was stingy in its hand and foot holds. A poor choice could send them crashing into the boulders that lay half submerged at its base.

  Steve looked at Deborah as their feet finally touched the tiny sand spit at the base of the cliff and shook his head in relief. “I don’t think I will be trying that climb any time soon again. I don’t know what I was thinking in the first place.”

  “Pity,” Deborah agreed. “I rather liked the cave.” She caught his eye and smiled but Steve looked away, a shadow crossing his face. What had gotten into him? His head told him that, even if he didn’t still love Sarah, he had no business starting a relationship with Deborah. He was too messed up to be worthwhile boyfriend material. But… another part of him wanted to take her back in his arms and spend a lot more time exploring that kiss. She had certainly seemed willing!

  Chuck was standing on the far bank, still stretching and yawning. “We piled your tubes over there, in the bushes,” he informed them. “Man, that storm was something! I didn’t think the rain would ever end!”

  “How would you know?” Jill laughed derisively. “He snored so loud at times we couldn’t even hear the thunder!” She called across to Deborah.

  The rest of the group hefted their tubes and skittered down the embankment. Pete waded in and moaned. “It feels colder than ever!” He announced plaintively.

  “Who’s stupid idea was it to do this, anyway?” Chuck grumbled , easing in to the water beside Pete.

  “Yours!” came back a chorus of replies.

  “Next time, do me a favor and ignore me,” he said grimly. Then he sighed. “Well, lets get this over with!” He fell onto his tube and pushed away from the bank. One by one, the rest of the group joined him.

  “One good thing,” Steve said as he tossed Deborah her tube. “The rain has made the current even faster. We should practically fly the rest of the way.”

  “Praise the Lord in all things,” Deb replied through her chattering teeth, as she pushed her tube back out into the current.

  “Amen!” Pete agreed as he sped by them.

  True to Steve’s prediction, they rounded the last curve sooner than they could have hoped. The tubes shot over the last set of mini rapids and drifted into the wide area that the public used as the local swimming hole. From there, they paddled to the landing and tiredly climbed the grassy bank to the parking lot. The sun was low in the sky but daylight still lingered. Everyone was relieved to have completed the run before dark had closed in on them on the river.

  As they hit the parking lot, Jill glanced at some wooden stalls and mad a bee line for them. “I don’t know about you,” she said to Deborah, “but I want to rinse under some warm water in the showers.”

  Pete and Chuck were already heading for the store to pick up some snacks and drinks for everyone.

  “Guess I’ll go crank the heater in the truck,” Steve said. He looked a little uncomfortably at Deborah, who was still standing next to him. “Coming?”

  “No, I’ll go with Jill,” she decided. She grabbed a dry towel out of the backpack in the truck bed and headed toward the shower stalls.

  Steve felt vaguely relieved. He wasn’t ready to be alone with her again so soon. He unlocked the door, cranked the engine and the heater, and then pulled it up near the store exit. He could make out Pete and Chuck, arms laden with chips, Twinkies and Gatorade, nearing the front of the checkout line. He glanced in the rearview mirror to see if Jill and Deborah had warmed up enough to leave the showers. Jill was nowhere to be seen, but Deborah was standing just outside the stalls, talking to a powerfully built man with short dark hair. Clearly she had never made it into the shower.

  Steve watched them through the rearview mirror. She was facing his direction, so only the back of the man’s head was visible. Steve couldn’t tell if she knew the man she was speaking with. She didn’t appear scared, but there was a wary look on her face that told him something about the encounter wasn’t quite right. Frowning, Steve continued to watch them, unsure if she would resent him if he intruded. Suddenly, the man reached out to grip Deborah’s arm. She stepped back out of his reach. The man gestured angrily, and Deborah shook her head, an angry frown on her face as she had to shake his hand off for a second time.

  “That’s it,” Steve decided. He threw open the door and strode toward Deborah. Deborah saw him approaching but instead of relief, she looked strangely frightened. Confused by the look on her face, Steve paused in mid-stride only a few feet away. The stranger caught the direction of Deborah’s glance and turned abruptly to see what had distracted her. His eyes locked with Steve’s and widened in disbelief. He turned an accusing stare back at Deborah.

  Steve stood frozen, too stunned to move or speak. He was older, more muscular, and with a hard edge to his movements and eyes. But it was still David.

  David’s eyes continued to bore accusingly in to Deborah’s. “Tell me,” he hissed angrily, “that you are not here with him.”

  “No, she is here with us, too,” Pete stepped up calmly on one side of Steve. Chuck stood squarely on the other. No one spoke for a moment. Finally, Pete stepped forward and offered a hand. “My name is Pete. We all work together at the park. Is there something we can help you with?”

  David ignored the hand. “I came to see Deborah,” he answered dismissively. Pete dropped the hand but continued in his calm friendly voice to try and engage the stranger in conversation. “So you’re a friend of hers, then?” He asked, looking toward Deborah’s stiff face for confirmation, but she remained silent, watching both the stranger and Steve with a mixture of dread and uncertainty.

  The stranger’s gaze turned to Steve. A sneer crossed his handsome features. “You could say.” He acknowledged sarcastically. “Seeing as we were engaged.”

  Stunned silence reigned as all eyes turned to Deborah for confirmation. She blanched white then blushed crimson and looked as if she were about to cry. She glanced toward Steve, who was staring blankly at the two of them.

  “You two were engaged…?” he asked in disbelief, clearly wanting her to deny what he had said.

  “I broke up with you almost two years ago, David!” She answered in a low, shaky voice. She turned to Steve. “We broke up a long time ago,” she repeated, a hopeless look in her eyes. “before he even joined the marine corps. I didn’t say anything about David and me because I never thought you’d – never thought we’d…” she stuttered into a helpless silence.

  David didn’t miss the implication of her words. His anger blazed and distorted his handsome features. He turned on her in fury. “You knew Deb! The one person! And you’re here - with him!” He gripped her arms. “I loved you! I came back here looking for you, and I find you with him!” He shouted, shaking her angrily.

  Snacks flew in all directions as Chuck and Pete scrambled to restrain David.

  “What the hell is going on here?” Chuck roared, wrenching the stranger’s arm behind his back. “Back off, or I will arrest you, whoever you are!” He threatened, his eyes flashing with indignation to see one of his rangers manhandled.

  David stood firmly sandwiched between Chuck and Pete, panting in his fury. He glared from Deborah to Steve, clearly far from being calm enough to be released from their lock hold on his arms.

  Deborah rubbed her shoulders, the bruises already showing through the red prints where David’
s hands had dug deeply into her arms. “I wrote you, David!” she told him resentfully. “This is my job! I was assigned here! Steve is assigned here, too, just like I am - it wasn’t like I asked to come here!”

  David sneered again. “But you didn’t mind it, did you?” He told her sarcastically. “You’ve always had a crush on him. You didn’t have a chance while my sister was around, but now, what’s to stop you?” He laughed harshly and spat at her feet. “No wonder you broke up with me!”

  “I broke up with you because you were acting crazy!” She shot back at him defiantly.

  “I saw how you were looking at him just now!” He retorted, his voice rising in renewed anger. Then he winced as Chuck and Pete automatically tightened their hold.

  “She’s telling the truth.” Steve spoke suddenly, although he avoided looking at Deborah, who paled at his flat statement. “We work in the park together,” he said woodenly. “Nothing more than that. Trust me.”

  David’s face twisted into disgust. “I trusted you with my sister,” he said in a low, ugly voice. “Look what you did to her!”

  “It was an accident, David,” Steve answered through gritted teeth. “I’d give anything to change that night. I can’t stand the thought of her lying in that bed!”

  David smiled coldly. He spoke in quiet triumph. “You won’t have to think of her any more at all, Steve. That is why I am home. She died of a stroke last week. She’s dead,” he repeated. .”You’ve killed her at last.”

  Silence followed as Steve stared in shock at David. His head began to spin. Sarah was dead? It was too much to comprehend. Steve staggered back a couple of steps, trying to take it in. Was this some kind of joke? Was David lying? But no, it was there in David’s eyes. His own pain was too raw to conceal. Sarah was gone.

  Abruptly, Steve turned on his heel and strode away from them all.

  Sarah was dead! He’d never really given up all hope that she would wake up someday. The knowledge that there was nothing left to hope for crushed him. Dimly, he heard David’s voice yelling after him, and he paused to make out the words.